Has anyone in here had an affair with a mutual friend or a neighbor of theirs ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These nanny writers need to put down the porn, it's so obvious. I'm sure all the wives were just mean and nasty, and all the husbands were just sweet and helpless, and ya'll just pranced around in bikinis all day

Actually, I'd like to hear more about what the au pairs/nannies did as they were laying in bed listening to the husband take the wife to Poundtown.

I'm sure you would, perhaps ask about it in the explicit forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband slept with our married neighbor who was also a good friend of mine. We all have kids. We are now separated, and the other couple is still together. Our kids play together, and our whole block was good friends but have somewhat fractioned into groups now. This has definitely made everything super awkward around here!

Ugh. Don't any of these idiot cheaters know the saying "don't sh*t where you eat?".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^ au pair - I was a nanny for two years for a wonderful family and I had a big time crush on the dad but never did anything about it thank God! They were living in California and we were scheduled to go on a vacation to Hawaii but the mom couldn’t go at the last minute due to work reasons but the the rest of us went. We stayed at a condo and for a week I felt like a very young mom because that’s what I was doing except for no sex.

Did the dad ever make a move on you? A week at a condo on the beach can be very enticing.

Not once and back then I looked darn good in a bikini. The people we met all assumed I was his wife and when they found out I was the nanny there was plenty of eye rolling. We had some flirty fun with that but that was as far as it went. He and his wife had a great relationship so it wasn’t going to happen. That was 25 or so years ago and they are still happily married.

I had the same experience - had a huge crush on the dad. He was hot and such a good guy. His wife was always very condescending to him and talked to him like he was an idiot. Being exposed to that was like nails on a chalkboard. He just absorbed it, never complained and took care of everything for the family. He was really great with his daughters too. I fantasized about sleeping with him more than I care to admit. They had a pool so he saw me in a bikini (which I looked great in) regularly. I flirted with him and could tell he found me attractive but he never made a move and there were lots of opportunities (like her nonstop “girls trips”). At the time I had fantasized about him so much that I would have slept with him in a minute if he asked. Looking back, I’m so glad I didn’t.

I was a live in nanny for a few families and I really got to see what couples are like behind the scenes. One woman was incredibly nasty to her husband but if you were a friend of hers you would never know it. My favorite couple had a very active sex life and my room was right beneath theirs so I often heard the going’s on which could get very raucous. I was pretty jealous because the dad was very good looking so I just fantasized it was me he was having sex with.

I'm sure he was doing the same. They must have known you could hear them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

You were annoyed by her. The gall of you. You are a horrible person.

Not the PP, but you're a judgmental one. People are people with all their imperfections and frailties. You weren't there to witness or to understand the situation fully. People fall for each other for any number of reasons and not everyone who marries knowingly signs up for the situation they face years later -- sometimes people bear little resemblance to the person they once were. Point is, you don't know this person at all beyond 2 paragraphs, yet you so willingly cast judgment and dispersion on someone you've never met. Must be nice to be perfect, though you sound like you've been burned/scorned.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

You were annoyed by her. The gall of you. You are a horrible person.

Not the PP, but you're a judgmental one. People are people with all their imperfections and frailties. You weren't there to witness or to understand the situation fully. People fall for each other for any number of reasons and not everyone who marries knowingly signs up for the situation they face years later -- sometimes people bear little resemblance to the person they once were. Point is, you don't know this person at all beyond 2 paragraphs, yet you so willingly cast judgment and dispersion on someone you've never met. Must be nice to be perfect, though you sound like you've been burned/scorned.

+1 Thank you for stating that so well. I wasn't able to put together a paragraph that eloquent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You were annoyed by her. The gall of you. You are a horrible person.

Not the PP, but you're a judgmental one. People are people with all their imperfections and frailties. You weren't there to witness or to understand the situation fully. People fall for each other for any number of reasons and not everyone who marries knowingly signs up for the situation they face years later -- sometimes people bear little resemblance to the person they once were. Point is, you don't know this person at all beyond 2 paragraphs, yet you so willingly cast judgment and dispersion on someone you've never met. Must be nice to be perfect, though you sound like you've been burned/scorned.

+1 Thank you for stating that so well. I wasn't able to put together a paragraph that eloquent.

+2. Well said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You were annoyed by her. The gall of you. You are a horrible person.

Not the PP, but you're a judgmental one. People are people with all their imperfections and frailties. You weren't there to witness or to understand the situation fully. People fall for each other for any number of reasons and not everyone who marries knowingly signs up for the situation they face years later -- sometimes people bear little resemblance to the person they once were. Point is, you don't know this person at all beyond 2 paragraphs, yet you so willingly cast judgment and dispersion on someone you've never met. Must be nice to be perfect, though you sound like you've been burned/scorned.

+1 Thank you for stating that so well. I wasn't able to put together a paragraph that eloquent.

+2. Well said.

Pots calling the kettle black. you scold pp, but accuse her of being a horrible judmental person. If you want people to speak nothing, but kindness to you you should a) avoid knowingly involving yourself in an affair as pp did b) avoid recounting your affair as a "cute" little anecdote from your 20s. while excusing the husband and disparaging the wife.

[Anonymous]

Wow also a former nanny here and all the dad did was leave toilets splattered with diarrhea and a million half full coffee cops around the house for kids to spill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow also a former nanny here and all the dad did was leave toilets splattered with diarrhea and a million half full coffee cops around the house for kids to spill.

Right. I was a nanny for over a decade, including live in. It was for the most part quite mundane, and I had zero interest in getting with the children's' father. Although I was there for the kids, to do my job, so that might be the difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow also a former nanny here and all the dad did was leave toilets splattered with diarrhea and a million half full coffee cops around the house for kids to spill.

Right. I was a nanny for over a decade, including live in. It was for the most part quite mundane, and I had zero interest in getting with the children's' father. Although I was there for the kids, to do my job, so that might be the difference.

Seems like the Dads worth getting with could manage to handle their kids without needing a nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow also a former nanny here and all the dad did was leave toilets splattered with diarrhea and a million half full coffee cops around the house for kids to spill.

Right. I was a nanny for over a decade, including live in. It was for the most part quite mundane, and I had zero interest in getting with the children's' father. Although I was there for the kids, to do my job, so that might be the difference.

Seems like the Dads worth getting with could manage to handle their kids without needing a nanny.

Caring for kids is a full time job. If both parents are working the kids would either have to have a nanny or be in daycare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow also a former nanny here and all the dad did was leave toilets splattered with diarrhea and a million half full coffee cops around the house for kids to spill.

Right. I was a nanny for over a decade, including live in. It was for the most part quite mundane, and I had zero interest in getting with the children's' father. Although I was there for the kids, to do my job, so that might be the difference.

Seems like the Dads worth getting with could manage to handle their kids without needing a nanny.

Caring for kids is a full time job. If both parents are working the kids would either have to have a nanny or be in daycare.

You don't need a full-time nanny who cleans up Dad's coffee cups and goes on Hawaiian vacations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow also a former nanny here and all the dad did was leave toilets splattered with diarrhea and a million half full coffee cops around the house for kids to spill.

Right. I was a nanny for over a decade, including live in. It was for the most part quite mundane, and I had zero interest in getting with the children's' father. Although I was there for the kids, to do my job, so that might be the difference.

Seems like the Dads worth getting with could manage to handle their kids without needing a nanny.

Caring for kids is a full time job. If both parents are working the kids would either have to have a nanny or be in daycare.

You don't need a full-time nanny who cleans up Dad's coffee cups and goes on Hawaiian vacations.

I was a full time nanny and I got to travel to many places I never would have visited in my early 20’s. They were ‘working’ vacations for me but most of the time the whole family was together and they included me. Both parents worked full time but they were really good parents. And the dad did his own dishes and laundry!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

Wow, where was this?

We lived in Bethesda! Host family still live there.

Has the dad ever tried finding you on fb ? Also, was he good in the sack ? Are you still au pairing or do you have a family of your own?

We are friends on Facebook but I’m friends with the entire family including extended family. I am not an Au pair anymore. I went to university after my Au Pair year and met my husband. He was good in the sack. I don’t know how to explain it but he paid a lot of attention to me. It felt very emotional, he would hold and kiss me for a long time. Back then I thought it was about me but when I look back now I think he was just looking for a human touch and he was trying to connect with someone who could make him feel like a man. Their relationship was awful. I lived in the house for a year and never saw them touch each other once, now even a pat on the back. I wish I could share more of what she would do to him in front of me and the kids. I’m afraid if I shared those who know her may figure out who I am.

Just a thought. but maybe the relationship was awful because the husband had a habit of cheating on his wife.

Seriously. You didn’t have the history and don’t know what this guy did. Honestly, you should feel bad and not sure why you still keep in touch with family. Do you want to feel good about how bad this marriage is so that you feel less bad about cheating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You were annoyed by her. The gall of you. You are a horrible person.

Not the PP, but you're a judgmental one. People are people with all their imperfections and frailties. You weren't there to witness or to understand the situation fully. People fall for each other for any number of reasons and not everyone who marries knowingly signs up for the situation they face years later -- sometimes people bear little resemblance to the person they once were. Point is, you don't know this person at all beyond 2 paragraphs, yet you so willingly cast judgment and dispersion on someone you've never met. Must be nice to be perfect, though you sound like you've been burned/scorned.

+1 Thank you for stating that so well. I wasn't able to put together a paragraph that eloquent.

+2. Well said.

Pots calling the kettle black. you scold pp, but accuse her of being a horrible judmental person. If you want people to speak nothing, but kindness to you you should a) avoid knowingly involving yourself in an affair as pp did b) avoid recounting your affair as a "cute" little anecdote from your 20s. while excusing the husband and disparaging the wife.

+100. Well said. Pot calling the kettle black.