Has anyone in here had an affair with a mutual friend or a neighbor of theirs ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
1. Au Pair, don't feel bad. It sounds like you two had a fun time and you ended it when it became untenable. The wife got what she deserved in that situation.

2. The rest of you, relax. Rematches happen, people make mistakes, and, whether you accept it or not, the adulterer is sometimes not the one most at fault... move past all of it with maturity and grace. It's the best form of revenge.

3. And get the money.

FFS. The adulterer is, as the title suggests, most certainly the most at fault for the adultery. They are the one that committed adultery. Penises don’t just happen to fall into vaginas on their own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

Wow, where was this?

We lived in Bethesda! Host family still live there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

Wow, where was this?

We lived in Bethesda! Host family still live there.

Has the dad ever tried finding you on fb ? Also, was he good in the sack ? Are you still au pairing or do you have a family of your own?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

Wow, where was this?

We lived in Bethesda! Host family still live there.

Which neighborhood in Bethesda?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

Wow, where was this?

We lived in Bethesda! Host family still live there.

Which neighborhood in Bethesda?

au pair, don't answer. And also - don't feel bad.

[Anonymous]

I don't think these situations are rare. Happened in our town, our friend group of married parents. It was painful to watch their pain when it all came to light and nearly all of them, the four of them wanted us to take sides, which we tried not to do. It was terrible. One couple moved away. The offending male was suicidal for awhile and we tried to be there for him. Our children are still close friends with the offending mom (who cheated with a friends husband). We never told anyone and will take the secret to the grave

[Anonymous]

WTH did you people grow up?!?!!

I grew up in the 70s/80s and all the parents on our cul-de-sec never cheated with one another and are all still good friends—in their 70s now.

Everyone is married to first spouse. No divorces on our street.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

Wow, where was this?

We lived in Bethesda! Host family still live there.

Has the dad ever tried finding you on fb ? Also, was he good in the sack ? Are you still au pairing or do you have a family of your own?

We are friends on Facebook but I’m friends with the entire family including extended family. I am not an Au pair anymore. I went to university after my Au Pair year and met my husband. He was good in the sack. I don’t know how to explain it but he paid a lot of attention to me. It felt very emotional, he would hold and kiss me for a long time. Back then I thought it was about me but when I look back now I think he was just looking for a human touch and he was trying to connect with someone who could make him feel like a man. Their relationship was awful. I lived in the house for a year and never saw them touch each other once, now even a pat on the back. I wish I could share more of what she would do to him in front of me and the kids. I’m afraid if I shared those who know her may figure out who I am.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WTH did you people grow up?!?!!

I grew up in the 70s/80s and all the parents on our cul-de-sec never cheated with one another and are all still good friends—in their 70s now.

Everyone is married to first spouse. No divorces on our street.

Hate to break it to you, but that is a neighborhood of swingers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

Wow, where was this?

We lived in Bethesda! Host family still live there.

Has the dad ever tried finding you on fb ? Also, was he good in the sack ? Are you still au pairing or do you have a family of your own?

We are friends on Facebook but I’m friends with the entire family including extended family. I am not an Au pair anymore. I went to university after my Au Pair year and met my husband. He was good in the sack. I don’t know how to explain it but he paid a lot of attention to me. It felt very emotional, he would hold and kiss me for a long time. Back then I thought it was about me but when I look back now I think he was just looking for a human touch and he was trying to connect with someone who could make him feel like a man. Their relationship was awful. I lived in the house for a year and never saw them touch each other once, now even a pat on the back. I wish I could share more of what she would do to him in front of me and the kids. I’m afraid if I shared those who know her may figure out who I am.

Thanks for being so honest. I appreciate your posts. All is forgiven from me. You said you learned your lesson and some people do learn from their mistakes. This man sounds submissive. I wonder why he can’t grow a pair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

Wow, where was this?

We lived in Bethesda! Host family still live there.

Has the dad ever tried finding you on fb ? Also, was he good in the sack ? Are you still au pairing or do you have a family of your own?

We are friends on Facebook but I’m friends with the entire family including extended family. I am not an Au pair anymore. I went to university after my Au Pair year and met my husband. He was good in the sack. I don’t know how to explain it but he paid a lot of attention to me. It felt very emotional, he would hold and kiss me for a long time. Back then I thought it was about me but when I look back now I think he was just looking for a human touch and he was trying to connect with someone who could make him feel like a man. Their relationship was awful. I lived in the house for a year and never saw them touch each other once, now even a pat on the back. I wish I could share more of what she would do to him in front of me and the kids. I’m afraid if I shared those who know her may figure out who I am.

Just a thought. but maybe the relationship was awful because the husband had a habit of cheating on his wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

Wow, where was this?

We lived in Bethesda! Host family still live there.

Has the dad ever tried finding you on fb ? Also, was he good in the sack ? Are you still au pairing or do you have a family of your own?

We are friends on Facebook but I’m friends with the entire family including extended family. I am not an Au pair anymore. I went to university after my Au Pair year and met my husband. He was good in the sack. I don’t know how to explain it but he paid a lot of attention to me. It felt very emotional, he would hold and kiss me for a long time. Back then I thought it was about me but when I look back now I think he was just looking for a human touch and he was trying to connect with someone who could make him feel like a man. Their relationship was awful. I lived in the house for a year and never saw them touch each other once, now even a pat on the back. I wish I could share more of what she would do to him in front of me and the kids. I’m afraid if I shared those who know her may figure out who I am.

Sounds like an awful life for them. Have you and he ever spoken about your affair?

[Anonymous]

^ Au Pair, I’m glad to hear you regret that this “happened,” but the way you talk about this gives the impression that you are not taking responsibility for what you did. You made choices, things just didn’t happen to you, and whatever rationalizations you provide (the mom was mean, etc.) does not change the fact that you knowingly did this with a married man while you were responsible for taking care of his kids. IMO, being friends with him on Facebook is bad form. If you really had remorse for your actions, you would cut him out of your life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WTH did you people grow up?!?!!

I grew up in the 70s/80s and all the parents on our cul-de-sec never cheated with one another and are all still good friends—in their 70s now.

Everyone is married to first spouse. No divorces on our street.

Back when key parties were a thing. Also people are good about keeping their secrets back then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you flame me please know that I feel awful about this and have truly changed. When I was an au pair I slept with my boss (it’s weird for me to say host dad)He was really sweet and his wife was awful. She would pick fights all the time and was disrespectful to people at work, in her family even to the kids and I. She used to go on business trips and girl trips all the time. A lot of times when she was away the kids would go to visit their grandparents. I stayed in the basement and one night went upstairs and we started talking and one thing led to another. We had an affair for months. He got really brave and would come down to my room when she went to bed. I thought I was in love with him and he told me he loved me. It become really awkward after a while. The closer we became, the more I annoyed I got when she was around. It become so unhealthy that I rematch and went across the country. After my year was up (back then you couldn’t extend) I came back to DC and I occasionally see them. They are still married. Anyway I see how horrible that was and I’m so sorry I ever got involved in that situation.

You were annoyed by her. The gall of you. You are a horrible person.

DP. And you probably think you’re not?

You are right! I don’t think I’m a horrible person but I do think sleeping with him was a horrible thing to do. I wish that it didn’t happen.

There were no other guys around? I was an Au Pair but sleeping with the host dad was the last thing on my mind, and he wasn't even too much older or completely out of shape.