DS Suffers Socially Because His Mom Doesn't Make friends With Other Moms

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP here. The hate doesn't surprise me, tbh. It just proves I'm right.

I already coach his baseball team. My ex does nothing. She's a loser and a bad mom so I was asking for help to get her to be a better mom. Apparently that touched a few nerves. lol.


Oh, honey. The only nerve that's touched is yours. Roll up the sleeves and take responsibility for your own child.
Anonymous
I really don’t understand this thread at all, TBH.

My kids are 12, 10, and 7. They all have plenty of friends. I am introverted and am NOT friends with most of their friends’ parents (only a few, and that is between all three kids combined). I’m polite with them and will chat a moment and say hi but I see no need to be friends with any of them. I have my own friends.

I drive them places (activities etc) and invite kids over if they ask me to.

I will invite the kids they ask regardless of how I feel about their parents (even if I care enough to outright dislike the parent).

I don’t see your point OP. Does your DS want to have a kid over? Then text the parent and ask. You have him signed up for an activity already, it seems. What else is there to do really? Again- I don’t understand what the problem is here.
Anonymous
OP sounds like some repressed good ol' southern boy that misses his mama!

Sorority girl? Bitch, I'm 50!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP sounds like some repressed good ol' southern boy that misses his mama!

Sorority girl? Bitch, I'm 50!


HAHAHA love it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Interesting that the posters state that since the wife works she is too busy to help the kids social life but those same people expect OP who we presume is employed to be able to handle the social life.

Smells like female hypocrisy. How shocking.


He's the one that's so goddamn concerned about their child's social life. If he cares that much, he should do something about it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP here. The hate doesn't surprise me, tbh. It just proves I'm right.

I already coach his baseball team. My ex does nothing. She's a loser and a bad mom so I was asking for help to get her to be a better mom. Apparently that touched a few nerves. lol.


Lie. If you coached (or even helped out a little), you would have mentioned that originally.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP here. The hate doesn't surprise me, tbh. It just proves I'm right.

I already coach his baseball team. My ex does nothing. She's a loser and a bad mom so I was asking for help to get her to be a better mom. Apparently that touched a few nerves. lol.


You screwed up by marrying a loser.

You fixed that by divorcing her.

Unfortunately, you can't fix her or change the fact that she is the mother of your child. You will have to make up where she is lacking. Perhaps you can get sole custody and hire a nanny/personal assistant to do some of what you need done.
Anonymous
OP, why aren’t you planning outings and get togethers with the baseball people?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. The hate doesn't surprise me, tbh. It just proves I'm right.

I already coach his baseball team. My ex does nothing. She's a loser and a bad mom so I was asking for help to get her to be a better mom. Apparently that touched a few nerves. lol.


I call "troll". I don't know a single man who uses "lol". Try harder next time and maybe listen more to how women talk.


Im a man and I use lol. I also use emojis, eat sushi, and like getting my hair played with. I bet that blows your narrow little mind.


Ew, dude. I get that you're triggered. You don't need to recite catch phrases from your Tinder account!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP here. The hate doesn't surprise me, tbh. It just proves I'm right.

I already coach his baseball team. My ex does nothing. She's a loser and a bad mom so I was asking for help to get her to be a better mom. Apparently that touched a few nerves. lol.


Your ex-wife dodged a massive bullet. I bet she feels like she's been busted out of prison after divorcing you.
Anonymous
OP what specifically is it that you envision for your son- as socially ideal?

IME school and an activity (soccer, baseball, etc) is mostly enough for a kid that age. There still tend to be frequent birthday parties as well, at that age. Add in a play date here and there. I’d say that is fairly typical based on my DCs and others we know. I have noticed that “only children” - kids without siblings- tend to do play dates a bit more often.

Are you picturing him having plans every day? Or something else? Sounds like attends school and does an activity- sounds normal enough to me.

Besides- your ex can do whatever she wants with him when he is with her. If you want more stuff going on for him- do it on your time.



Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP here. The hate doesn't surprise me, tbh. It just proves I'm right.

I already coach his baseball team. My ex does nothing. She's a loser and a bad mom so I was asking for help to get her to be a better mom. Apparently that touched a few nerves. lol.

And does your son have friends through the baseball team that you coach? And if he does, are you saying that it's not enough, and that the mom should join some group to get your son to have more friends?

Honestly, I don't understand why you think parents should engineer their kids' social lives? I get involving your kids in activities. We do for our kids, of course. Scouts, soccer, dance, what have you. But it's not to make friends, though that can be a side benefit. My kids make their own friends. We have made adult friends through our children's activities, but that's not why we had our children join the activities. We will certainly do playdates if my kids want to, but we don't manufacture friendships for our children. Yes, you want to foster an environment for your children to be able to make friends, but that doesn't mean that *you* as the parent has to be involved in an organization to do that. Why can't your son just be put in some other activity where he might make a friend?

It's great that coach his baseball team. I'm always greatful for parents who volunteer their time, but I am not going to go out of my way to join a group that I don't like just so that my kids can make more friends. They should learn how to do that on their own without my involvement at some point.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. The hate doesn't surprise me, tbh. It just proves I'm right.

I already coach his baseball team. My ex does nothing. She's a loser and a bad mom so I was asking for help to get her to be a better mom. Apparently that touched a few nerves. lol.


You screwed up by marrying a loser.

You fixed that by divorcing her.

Unfortunately, you can't fix her or change the fact that she is the mother of your child. You will have to make up where she is lacking. Perhaps you can get sole custody and hire a nanny/personal assistant to do some of what you need done.


+1
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My ex DW is not a girly girl. She doesn't do junior league or volunteer at food centers or any other of the things my son's friends moms do. She does not click with them at all. She's not socially awkward at all and is quite successful professionally, but she just isn't a sorority girl.

As such, my 8 year old son gets excluded from a lot of thing organized by the other moms.

How do I change this?

I'm not a sorority girl, either, and I'd rather eat dirt than be a part of an organization that acts like a sorority just so my kids can be part of that clique group. No thank you.

-signed a scout troop leader and parent
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. The hate doesn't surprise me, tbh. It just proves I'm right.

I already coach his baseball team. My ex does nothing. She's a loser and a bad mom so I was asking for help to get her to be a better mom. Apparently that touched a few nerves. lol.


You screwed up by marrying a loser.

You fixed that by divorcing her.

Unfortunately, you can't fix her or change the fact that she is the mother of your child. You will have to make up where she is lacking. Perhaps you can get sole custody and hire a nanny/personal assistant to do some of what you need done.


+1

+1 isn't this what moms with deadbeat ex-husbands do.. compensate for the lacking parent? That's what my sister has done with her deadbeat ex.
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