The OP is the one complaining. If he thinks this is a problem, he can fix it. |
No, people are saying that OP sees this as an issue and so what is he doing about it since they both work. Why does he think the mom should be the one to get engaged to better THEIR son's social life, and not himself? |
or, maybe they do. Case in point -- OP who seems to think he is incapable of helping organize his son's social life, so he wants DCUM's advise on how to pressure the mom to do it because presumably, he thinks moms can do it better. |
This is so true. OP, cub scouts or sports is probably your best bet. Tons of boys and opportunity to get to know boys and parents. Both my boys have made friends at cub Scouts and soccer. One den leader is very social and outgoing while his wife is a bit socially awkward. I remember sending an evite to mom and she never responded. I sent it to the dad and he responded yes within the hour. Dad seems in charge of kids. He is also active at school academic extracurriculars. My DH coaches Science Olympiad. |
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I had to google junior league.
Dads can be involved too. I’m a SAHM, am the room parent, active in the pta, etc. I met a lot of parents and kids on a field trip. This was when I was working and not active at school at all. I talked to some moms and dads on the bus. More than the parents, I saw the kids my child talked about. When we host bingo night or movie night, there are some dads who help set up or clean up. I always remember them. We once hosted a party at our house and I always remember the dad who helped clean up afterwards. I also remember the dad who helped make sandwiches for the homeless with my group. The kids of these involved dads are such great kids. I care less about clicking with the mom or dad. I do like my kids to be friends with nice kids. |
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OP here. The hate doesn't surprise me, tbh. It just proves I'm right.
I already coach his baseball team. My ex does nothing. She's a loser and a bad mom so I was asking for help to get her to be a better mom. Apparently that touched a few nerves. lol. |
I call "troll". I don't know a single man who uses "lol". Try harder next time and maybe listen more to how women talk. |
I highly recommend cub scouts. Even if you are not the den leader, lots of opportunities for your son to hang out with other kids and make friends. You should be active. DH and I both have going to anything cub scouts but my kids love it. 8yo DS just went to a kid’s home, not the den leader, and had an awesome time. They did their meeting and got to hang out and play. I was talking and socializing with the moms and dads. It was fun for all. There are camping outings. DH has gotten to know other dads by going on the camping trips. Again, we both are not camping type people but we did this for the kids. They have a blast. |
Im a man and I use lol. I also use emojis, eat sushi, and like getting my hair played with. I bet that blows your narrow little mind. |
I’m going to stick up for OP. Cut him some slack. He is trying to make some friends for his son. DH has a friend who has a similar complaint about his wife. She is a successful doctor and seems antisocial with the kids parents from school. DH told me about an event she once tried to host and no one showed up. They all cancelled last minute or no showed. |
You lost any day in that when you got divorced. Also, you can set up get-togethers with your kid’s friends regardless of what your ex is doing. Or is the real issue that you don’t think your kid has the “right” friends and trying to force your ex into some social engineering to get your kid connected to the “right” people. |
I think we just do not understand what you are asking for here- and why? My 9yo has lots of friends- from school, from sports (baseball, flag football). He attends bday parties (and we throw them) and has a play date here and there. All is well. I see no need to join things I don’t want to, and become friends with other moms - to make friends for my kid. If your kid attends school and sports that’s great. Are you certain that it isn’t an issue your kid’s social skills? I do not say that to be rude, either. But all 3 of my kids have friends, things to do etc with little effort from me. I drive them to activities, host birthday parties annually, invite a kid over here and there if they ask me to. Nothing more needed. |
No, OP is trying to force his ex wife into becoming the kind of social climber he’s incapable of being. |
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Where do you live, OP?
I have met women like you describe. We don’t click and I have no interest in hanging out with them. Fortunately, none of my sons’ friends’ moms fit your description and my kids have lots of friends and no shortage of play date and birthday party invitations. They are both in elementary. I also have a preschool daughter and worry I have to try to blend in with these women for my daughter’s sake. I’m not a girly girl. I am fairly attractive, work out and have an Ivy League education. DH earns a high income and we live in a nice home in the right neighborhood. Do I really want to hang out with women who will judge me or accept me based on where I live and how I look? I think I will pass. |
How shocking that a red piller would deliberately misread a thread to suit his misogynistic worldview. |