Friend who wanted to do childcare bailed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why don’t you just call her on her cell or home phone.

Suzy I was counting on you for childcare. Do you not want to provide that now? No? Ok thanks I have to work on finding a daycare. Hang up.

See not hard. Sometimes you really do need to confront people.

If she was running a daycare, she can’t close due to her own kid with a sniffle. See whatcplan did she have? None.

Find a paid spot. No running home. No saddling your husband in the afternoon. Isn’t he working?

Op. I did confront her last night when she responded with the made up excuse. I told her she left me in a bad spot. Maybe she did want me to pay her?! I really don't know because I am not a mind reader. I kept telling her in the beginning that I wanted to do this properly and pay her a home daycare rate. This was only supposed to be temporarily until December. I was planning on giving her gift cards because she kept insisting on not exchanging cash. I really think it's a cultural thing. My husband is from the same background and he said giving cash could be offensive. I really wish she could have just been honest with me about things and at least finished the week. It was 2 days this week. I have given her ride's to the store's, doctor appointments and I bring her food because she doesn't drive.Anyway it's over now and I will tour a daycare today.

What is the culture?

[Anonymous]

You can always say "We think it is very important Larlo socializes with other children in a more structured setting and we were given a spot in a daycare close to us, so we are putting him in daycare. Thanks for all your help."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can always say "We think it is very important Larlo socializes with other children in a more structured setting and we were given a spot in a daycare close to us, so we are putting him in daycare. Thanks for all your help."

What help?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can always say "We think it is very important Larlo socializes with other children in a more structured setting and we were given a spot in a daycare close to us, so we are putting him in daycare. Thanks for all your help."

What thread did you read?

[Anonymous]

Op here. I toured a daycare at my husband's office today and they have an available spot for our son. I am really happy with the school. I think it's better than a home daycare. I don't know what's going on at a home daycare. How do I know they're not watching TV all day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were you paying her?

Op. No she didn't want me to pay her! My son was only with her for 4 hour's yesterday. I texted her in the evening to confirm things were ok and she did not respond. I also sent her a Facebook message this morning. She is active on Facebook. I told her I would really like to pay an in home daycare rate but she said no. I thought I would buy her gift cards and things like that to show my appreciation. I am trying not to freak out but I have work on Friday. I need reliable childcare. My friend was so excited to do this.

LMAO

You weren't paying the woman and you said she was excited to start an at-home daycare. Meaning a business.

She was waiting for you to bring up the financial remuneration, when you didn't she cut her losses. If I were you I'd apologize and thank her for taking care of your child for free for a day and move on.

[Anonymous]

In what reality does expect someone else to take care of their child for FREE? I wouldn't even take care of my friend's dog without some kind of contribution. OP, you're nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I toured a daycare at my husband's office today and they have an available spot for our son. I am really happy with the school. I think it's better than a home daycare. I don't know what's going on at a home daycare. How do I know they're not watching TV all day?

I don't think you can make such sweeping generalizations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I toured a daycare at my husband's office today and they have an available spot for our son. I am really happy with the school. I think it's better than a home daycare. I don't know what's going on at a home daycare. How do I know they're not watching TV all day?

I vastly prefer my home daycare to the large corporate centers we toured but we also did a lot of legwork to find the right home daycare with the right staff and curriculum and put ourselves on the waitlist for several months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were you paying her?

Op. No she didn't want me to pay her! My son was only with her for 4 hour's yesterday. I texted her in the evening to confirm things were ok and she did not respond. I also sent her a Facebook message this morning. She is active on Facebook. I told her I would really like to pay an in home daycare rate but she said no. I thought I would buy her gift cards and things like that to show my appreciation. I am trying not to freak out but I have work on Friday. I need reliable childcare. My friend was so excited to do this.

LMAO

You weren't paying the woman and you said she was excited to start an at-home daycare. Meaning a business.

She was waiting for you to bring up the financial remuneration, when you didn't she cut her losses. If I were you I'd apologize and thank her for taking care of your child for free for a day and move on.

I think you're being harsh. I asked her many times if she wanted to be paid and she said NO. It was supposed to be a temporary thing for 1 month. I also brought her lunch and a $5 coffee the day she took care of my son. I have given her a ride to doctor appointments, story time and the grocery store many times. She said she wanted to help me out as a friend because I help her out too. She's a flakey person. If she wanted to be paid then she shouldn't have rejected everytime I brought it up. Anyway I am really happy with the school I toured today. I need professional childcare. My friend really screwed me over and she lied to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I toured a daycare at my husband's office today and they have an available spot for our son. I am really happy with the school. I think it's better than a home daycare. I don't know what's going on at a home daycare. How do I know they're not watching TV all day?

I don't think you can make such sweeping generalizations.

Unless your in home daycare has a camera you can view all day I think it's a very valid point. It's one of the reasons we went with a center.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In what reality does expect someone else to take care of their child for FREE? I wouldn't even take care of my friend's dog without some kind of contribution. OP, you're nuts.

I could see this happening with friends. I would feel very uncomfortable accepting money for taking care of my friends dog. You're a bit off pp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were you paying her?

Op. No she didn't want me to pay her! My son was only with her for 4 hour's yesterday. I texted her in the evening to confirm things were ok and she did not respond. I also sent her a Facebook message this morning. She is active on Facebook. I told her I would really like to pay an in home daycare rate but she said no. I thought I would buy her gift cards and things like that to show my appreciation. I am trying not to freak out but I have work on Friday. I need reliable childcare. My friend was so excited to do this.

LMAO

You weren't paying the woman and you said she was excited to start an at-home daycare. Meaning a business.

She was waiting for you to bring up the financial remuneration, when you didn't she cut her losses. If I were you I'd apologize and thank her for taking care of your child for free for a day and move on.

I think you're being harsh. I asked her many times if she wanted to be paid and she said NO. It was supposed to be a temporary thing for 1 month. I also brought her lunch and a $5 coffee the day she took care of my son. I have given her a ride to doctor appointments, story time and the grocery store many times. She said she wanted to help me out as a friend because I help her out too. She's a flakey person. If she wanted to be paid then she shouldn't have rejected everytime I brought it up. Anyway I am really happy with the school I toured today. I need professional childcare. My friend really screwed me over and she lied to me.

I agree with you OP. I am sorry this happened to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In what reality does expect someone else to take care of their child for FREE? I wouldn't even take care of my friend's dog without some kind of contribution. OP, you're nuts.

I could see this happening with friends. I would feel very uncomfortable accepting money for taking care of my friends dog. You're a bit off pp.

If its a job that people get paid for, you should extend the same courtesy to your friends in my opinion. Once in a while - like twice a year - sure watch the dog. But if you're on vacation every month or need a weekly sitter while you're at work, stop being a moocher and pay people what they're worth.

[Anonymous]

It is very possible child had a reaction to the vaccine. Kids have reactions. I find it odd you got a spot for a child under two instantly like that.