Starting to Think I'll Never Meet Anyone

[Anonymous]

I'm discouraged, but I refuse to accept that I'm headed for kaftans and cats.

Look, I get that it is discouraging, but the choices are not snag a man or be headed for "kaftans and cats." I have several friends in their early to late 50s who are single or divorced and not dating. They travel, they have hobbies, they are fun to be around and interesting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I'm discouraged, but I refuse to accept that I'm headed for kaftans and cats.

Look, I get that it is discouraging, but the choices are not snag a man or be headed for "kaftans and cats." I have several friends in their early to late 50s who are single or divorced and not dating. They travel, they have hobbies, they are fun to be around and interesting.

Men follow the path of least resistance. If all men have left are old and high maintenance in the States, men travel, too - to places like Europe, Russia, Mexico, Central America, South America, South Asia... There are plenty of women there. No excuse to say there are no men left. This is a boloney.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all these 35 year old women gagging to go out with men in their 50s? I just turned 40, and am happily married, but there's no way I or my younger friends would be looking at the 50+ crowd. Maybe the women who can't get men closer to their own age, but then they don't seem like such great catches...

I don't know what a 50yo man looks like in your set, but I am a 50yo man and I find I click very well with women from 35 on up. Reasonably fit 50yo men with their life in order and decent post-divorce situations can be a very attractive feature to a 35 to 42 yo woman. I would be happy to have more kids if necessary, but no pressure either way. I don't see much competition from men in those younger age brackets, maybe because a lot of them are married still? And if they aren't married they have some reason why they never married by 40 or so. In any event, the "50+ crowd" isn't all early dinners and false teeth. It's more like work, gym, interesting daily life with friends and family, etc.

Yep, early 50s and that's me too. Plenty of 30-something women are more than happy to go out with me. Love all the anecdata from the "I don't know a single woman my age doing this!" crowd though. (Hint: you don't know every woman in this very large area.)

I have no interest in a late 40s early 50s woman. Why? Firstly, most of them are physically unattractive, and secondly, I just divorced that so why should I go get another version of the same thing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just be glad you're not 70. Men live shorter lives than women, so the retirement communities are full of women with only a few men around. Some of them have been having outbreaks of STDs (not kidding) since the post-menopausal crowd isnt' worried about pregnancy, and that generation didn't grow up in fear of AIDS.

My mom is in assisted living and the thought of all those old codgers getting it on... EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:+ I’m turning 35 this year and the thought of dating a 50 year old turns my stomach. I don’t really care for men over 40 but I’ll go early 40s. Most men I’ve dated have been 30 something and some were a little younger.

50yo man here. There are three types of women:
(1) Only want a man near their own age, and will not consider an older man.
(2) Prefer a man near their own age, but are open to an older man.
(3) Actively prefer an older man.

Just because you are in group one, don't make the mistake of thinking 20- and 30-something women in group three don't exist. And keep in mind, women in group three often conceal this preference from other women because they don't want to hear all the "ewww grosss!" shaming language from women in group one.

Group two, by the way, is good for a fling but generally not a long-term relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all these 35 year old women gagging to go out with men in their 50s? I just turned 40, and am happily married, but there's no way I or my younger friends would be looking at the 50+ crowd. Maybe the women who can't get men closer to their own age, but then they don't seem like such great catches...

I agree. My limit is about seven years older and even that feels a little old. When I was early 30s I didn't even want to date guys who were forty.

There are guys on this board who constantly try to convince women:
A) they need to sleep with men right away
And b) they need to date guys way older because guys around their age and a little
Older aren't interested.

I have zero friends who are willing to date guys fifteen years older or even ten years older.

+ I’m turning 35 this year and the thought of dating a 50 year old turns my stomach. I don’t really care for men over 40 but I’ll go early 40s. Most men I’ve dated have been 30 something and some were a little younger.

If you were a divorced SAH woman that never had a career to fall back on I'm sure you would have a different attitude

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all these 35 year old women gagging to go out with men in their 50s? I just turned 40, and am happily married, but there's no way I or my younger friends would be looking at the 50+ crowd. Maybe the women who can't get men closer to their own age, but then they don't seem like such great catches...

I don't know what a 50yo man looks like in your set, but I am a 50yo man and I find I click very well with women from 35 on up. Reasonably fit 50yo men with their life in order and decent post-divorce situations can be a very attractive feature to a 35 to 42 yo woman. I would be happy to have more kids if necessary, but no pressure either way. I don't see much competition from men in those younger age brackets, maybe because a lot of them are married still? And if they aren't married they have some reason why they never married by 40 or so. In any event, the "50+ crowd" isn't all early dinners and false teeth. It's more like work, gym, interesting daily life with friends and family, etc.

Yep, early 50s and that's me too. Plenty of 30-something women are more than happy to go out with me. Love all the anecdata from the "I don't know a single woman my age doing this!" crowd though. (Hint: you don't know every woman in this very large area.)

I have no interest in a late 40s early 50s woman. Why? Firstly, most of them are physically unattractive, and secondly, I just divorced that so why should I go get another version of the same thing?

I am the first poster in this response.

I would add, at age 50, divorced, I am in the best shape of my life. I have literally never looked better. I worked in large law firms as a young man and ate bad food and never worked out. I then got married and went through the young children years. When I look around downtown and see the 35yo male competition, with some exceptions, most of those guys have beards and paunches and many have little life experience compared to a man with my experience. I am also way "cooler" without trying hard, because I truly DGAF about much. Few things bother me. Having lived my life, when I go out in a group with some 30 to 40 yo guys I almost feel like it's unfair, in comparison to them I must seem like the most interesting man in the world. And I am not bragging, I actually have to tone down my accomplishments because I don't want to look like a blowhard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all these 35 year old women gagging to go out with men in their 50s? I just turned 40, and am happily married, but there's no way I or my younger friends would be looking at the 50+ crowd. Maybe the women who can't get men closer to their own age, but then they don't seem like such great catches...

I don't know what a 50yo man looks like in your set, but I am a 50yo man and I find I click very well with women from 35 on up. Reasonably fit 50yo men with their life in order and decent post-divorce situations can be a very attractive feature to a 35 to 42 yo woman. I would be happy to have more kids if necessary, but no pressure either way. I don't see much competition from men in those younger age brackets, maybe because a lot of them are married still? And if they aren't married they have some reason why they never married by 40 or so. In any event, the "50+ crowd" isn't all early dinners and false teeth. It's more like work, gym, interesting daily life with friends and family, etc.

Yep, early 50s and that's me too. Plenty of 30-something women are more than happy to go out with me. Love all the anecdata from the "I don't know a single woman my age doing this!" crowd though. (Hint: you don't know every woman in this very large area.)

I have no interest in a late 40s early 50s woman. Why? Firstly, most of them are physically unattractive, and secondly, I just divorced that so why should I go get another version of the same thing?

I am the first poster in this response.

I would add, at age 50, divorced, I am in the best shape of my life. I have literally never looked better. I worked in large law firms as a young man and ate bad food and never worked out. I then got married and went through the young children years. When I look around downtown and see the 35yo male competition, with some exceptions, most of those guys have beards and paunches and many have little life experience compared to a man with my experience. I am also way "cooler" without trying hard, because I truly DGAF about much. Few things bother me. Having lived my life, when I go out in a group with some 30 to 40 yo guys I almost feel like it's unfair, in comparison to them I must seem like the most interesting man in the world. And I am not bragging, I actually have to tone down my accomplishments because I don't want to look like a blowhard.

(I mean the second poster - the 50yo man)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+ I’m turning 35 this year and the thought of dating a 50 year old turns my stomach. I don’t really care for men over 40 but I’ll go early 40s. Most men I’ve dated have been 30 something and some were a little younger.

50yo man here. There are three types of women:
(1) Only want a man near their own age, and will not consider an older man.
(2) Prefer a man near their own age, but are open to an older man.
(3) Actively prefer an older man.

Just because you are in group one, don't make the mistake of thinking 20- and 30-something women in group three don't exist. And keep in mind, women in group three often conceal this preference from other women because they don't want to hear all the "ewww grosss!" shaming language from women in group one.

Group two, by the way, is good for a fling but generally not a long-term relationship.

I second this as a late 20s woman married to my early 60s DH. I don't reveal certain details about my husband to acquaintances because I don't want to shock them with the age difference. Oh and if you want to diss my choice of spouse based on his age, save it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all these 35 year old women gagging to go out with men in their 50s? I just turned 40, and am happily married, but there's no way I or my younger friends would be looking at the 50+ crowd. Maybe the women who can't get men closer to their own age, but then they don't seem like such great catches...

For most of them it's a brief sugar daddy thing, nothing more, nothing less. I have a 33 year old friend dating a 50 something guy who in six months has taken on at least three great trips. She knows its not going to be a LTR but she's having some fun.

The guy is an idiot.

This is my brother. He thinks he's the man, but we are doing this:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all these 35 year old women gagging to go out with men in their 50s? I just turned 40, and am happily married, but there's no way I or my younger friends would be looking at the 50+ crowd. Maybe the women who can't get men closer to their own age, but then they don't seem like such great catches...

For most of them it's a brief sugar daddy thing, nothing more, nothing less. I have a 33 year old friend dating a 50 something guy who in six months has taken on at least three great trips. She knows its not going to be a LTR but she's having some fun.

The guy is an idiot.

This is my brother. He thinks he's the man, but we are doing this:

He’s having regular sex with a beautiful woman and he cares if you’re making faces?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all these 35 year old women gagging to go out with men in their 50s? I just turned 40, and am happily married, but there's no way I or my younger friends would be looking at the 50+ crowd. Maybe the women who can't get men closer to their own age, but then they don't seem like such great catches...

For most of them it's a brief sugar daddy thing, nothing more, nothing less. I have a 33 year old friend dating a 50 something guy who in six months has taken on at least three great trips. She knows its not going to be a LTR but she's having some fun.

The guy is an idiot.

This is my brother. He thinks he's the man, but we are doing this:

He’s having regular sex with a beautiful woman and he cares if you’re making faces?

We roll our eyes because they are only interested in his big wallet, not his big belly, and don't think that's brag-worthy.

[Anonymous]

Had sex. Doesn't care what you think

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Had sex. Doesn't care what you think

Eh, I don't really care. His nearly same age daughters do though. They have lost respect for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be glad you're not 70. Men live shorter lives than women, so the retirement communities are full of women with only a few men around. Some of them have been having outbreaks of STDs (not kidding) since the post-menopausal crowd isnt' worried about pregnancy, and that generation didn't grow up in fear of AIDS.

My mom is in assisted living and the thought of all those old codgers getting it on... EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

I don't find this repulsive at all. Who says sexuality has to die before a person does?