Men: why do women like the bad boys so much?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:2. "Why do some women choose the bad man, when they have access to a variety of both good and bad men who are equally attractive?" This is a harder question IMHO.

To continue the Star Wars metaphor, this is the struggle Leia had when she was interested in both Han Solo and Luke (before she knew Luke was her brother obviously).

[Anonymous]

My friends and I were talking about this recently. I don't go for "bad boys" - never have - but I have on occasion ended up dating them. It's not always easy to tell who's good and who's bad right away. They are generally all nice when they are trying to impress you, and often the bad boys are less nervous and more confident, which can be attractive.

I like "nice" people, but quite honestly, when I'm looking to date someone, "nice" isn't the first adjective I'm looking for. Lots of people are nice or seem nice, and just being nice (to my face) doesn't mean I'll have anything in common with you. I want you to be smart, interesting and have a good sense of humor.

A lot of guys who call themselves "nice" are actually passive aggressive and have anger that will come out if they don't get what they think they deserve. Every woman I know has dated one of those guys. Some guys feel entitled to their own "hot girl" like in the movies. In real life, everyone doesn't just magically get their own "hot girl".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:2. "Why do some women choose the bad man, when they have access to a variety of both good and bad men who are equally attractive?" This is a harder question IMHO.

To continue the Star Wars metaphor, this is the struggle Leia had when she was interested in both Han Solo and Luke (before she knew Luke was her brother obviously).

+ 1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friends and I were talking about this recently. I don't go for "bad boys" - never have - but I have on occasion ended up dating them. It's not always easy to tell who's good and who's bad right away. They are generally all nice when they are trying to impress you, and often the bad boys are less nervous and more confident, which can be attractive.

I like "nice" people, but quite honestly, when I'm looking to date someone, "nice" isn't the first adjective I'm looking for. Lots of people are nice or seem nice, and just being nice (to my face) doesn't mean I'll have anything in common with you. I want you to be smart, interesting and have a good sense of humor.

A lot of guys who call themselves "nice" are actually passive aggressive and have anger that will come out if they don't get what they think they deserve. Every woman I know has dated one of those guys. Some guys feel entitled to their own "hot girl" like in the movies. In real life, everyone doesn't just magically get their own "hot girl".

If you can, watch how a guy treats other guys who are smaller and/or lower on the social pecking order. That'll tell you most of what you need to know about whether a guy is legitimately kind or just putting on a show.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friends and I were talking about this recently. I don't go for "bad boys" - never have - but I have on occasion ended up dating them. It's not always easy to tell who's good and who's bad right away. They are generally all nice when they are trying to impress you, and often the bad boys are less nervous and more confident, which can be attractive.

I like "nice" people, but quite honestly, when I'm looking to date someone, "nice" isn't the first adjective I'm looking for. Lots of people are nice or seem nice, and just being nice (to my face) doesn't mean I'll have anything in common with you. I want you to be smart, interesting and have a good sense of humor.

A lot of guys who call themselves "nice" are actually passive aggressive and have anger that will come out if they don't get what they think they deserve. Every woman I know has dated one of those guys. Some guys feel entitled to their own "hot girl" like in the movies. In real life, everyone doesn't just magically get their own "hot girl".

If you can, watch how a guy treats other guys who are smaller and/or lower on the social pecking order. That'll tell you most of what you need to know about whether a guy is legitimately kind or just putting on a show.

I actually look at how they treat older women, hotel maids, service workers, etc. Most men will be nice and kind to pretty young baristas but How they treat older, invisible women really shows what kind of person they are.

[Anonymous]

I'm 12:51 and I agree with 13:19 and 13:30. How they treat service employees is a big deal. I've dated guys who came off as a bit douchey to their peers but were on a buddy-buddy relationship with the guy who worked in their parking garage and the security guy in their building, and were nice to every server they met. That means a lot to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've posted this before, and will say it again. Most women do not like bad boys. They like hot men. A lot of hot men are jerks, because they can get away with it and because people have catered to them their whole lives because they were so good looking. (Hollywood is filled with these guys....).

Ugly bad boys don't get the women. Hot nice guys get even more women than hot bad boys. This is why guys who are pediatricians and other "helping" fields have a huge advantage. Give a woman two equally attractive men -- one is a pediatric onconlogist with a great relationship with his sisters; the other is a convicted felon who cheats on his girlfriends. I guarantee you that 99% of women are going to prefer the hot pediatrician.

The whole "women prefer bad boys" thing was invented by guys who are not good looking, to excuse why they aren't getting the women ("nice guys finish last"). The truth is that women are almost as shallow as men -- we also like our partners to be hot. Sorry.

So you are saying most women want them all: good looks and good money. What a surprise!

ding, ding, ding

But this is so true. I briefly dated a multi millionaire cheater who was handsome and exceled at art of love making. Yes, he cheats on his wife but i have never bedn treated so well.

Dear Penthouse forum.....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have one son who is extremely attractive, tall, and a very good athlete. Ever since kindergarten, girls have been following him around. It has made him arrogant when it comes to women. No matter how many he might piss off there's 2 more waiting. Im worried he will never settle down. It is women's reaction to him that causes him to be less and less grounded.

Yes, I've talked to him, but the girls keep throwing themselves at him,actung like fools. Last one he broke up with was on my porch srunk at 1am begging for them to bw together. It's outrageous. I wish a girl would come along and give him his own medicine.

...how old is he? They will, don't worry...

-2

This woman is describing my ex twenty years ago. Always been a chick magnet, no matter how dishonest, cold, or manipulative he is. He's gorgeous, charismatic, and (mostly) nice. Every female, from little girls to old ladies, fall in love with him. It's ridiculous.

I agree. It is up to his parents to knock some sense into this kid before he goes on to ruin the lives of several women in the future.

Yes of course it is because we shouldn't assume women should actually exercise decent judgment. Amazing how so many women refuse to accept responsibility for their own judgement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friends and I were talking about this recently. I don't go for "bad boys" - never have - but I have on occasion ended up dating them. It's not always easy to tell who's good and who's bad right away. They are generally all nice when they are trying to impress you, and often the bad boys are less nervous and more confident, which can be attractive.

I like "nice" people, but quite honestly, when I'm looking to date someone, "nice" isn't the first adjective I'm looking for. Lots of people are nice or seem nice, and just being nice (to my face) doesn't mean I'll have anything in common with you. I want you to be smart, interesting and have a good sense of humor.

A lot of guys who call themselves "nice" are actually passive aggressive and have anger that will come out if they don't get what they think they deserve. Every woman I know has dated one of those guys. Some guys feel entitled to their own "hot girl" like in the movies. In real life, everyone doesn't just magically get their own "hot girl".

No they are easy to spot in virtually every instance, you chose to overlook it. Your comment about "nice" people is spot on in my opinion, i hope people take your words to heart. You are right some guys think they are "entitled" to their own hot girl, just as (probably even more) women think they are entitled to their own hot, rich or whatever guy. People are pretty dumb on a whole, we are so brilliant yet so stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friends and I were talking about this recently. I don't go for "bad boys" - never have - but I have on occasion ended up dating them. It's not always easy to tell who's good and who's bad right away. They are generally all nice when they are trying to impress you, and often the bad boys are less nervous and more confident, which can be attractive.

I like "nice" people, but quite honestly, when I'm looking to date someone, "nice" isn't the first adjective I'm looking for. Lots of people are nice or seem nice, and just being nice (to my face) doesn't mean I'll have anything in common with you. I want you to be smart, interesting and have a good sense of humor.

A lot of guys who call themselves "nice" are actually passive aggressive and have anger that will come out if they don't get what they think they deserve. Every woman I know has dated one of those guys. Some guys feel entitled to their own "hot girl" like in the movies. In real life, everyone doesn't just magically get their own "hot girl".

If you can, watch how a guy treats other guys who are smaller and/or lower on the social pecking order. That'll tell you most of what you need to know about whether a guy is legitimately kind or just putting on a show.

I actually look at how they treat older women, hotel maids, service workers, etc. Most men will be nice and kind to pretty young baristas but How they treat older, invisible women really shows what kind of person they are.

Wise words. As the saying goes, "when people show you who they are you better listen".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:2. "Why do some women choose the bad man, when they have access to a variety of both good and bad men who are equally attractive?" This is a harder question IMHO.

To continue the Star Wars metaphor, this is the struggle Leia had when she was interested in both Han Solo and Luke (before she knew Luke was her brother obviously).

Are you seriously suggesting that Mark Hamill and Harrison FOrd were equally attractive (especially at the point that Last Jedi or empire were filmed)???? Again, this boils down yo the fact that Harrison was astoundingly good looking, not the fact that he was a smuggler.
Besides, he’s not really a bad boy. He saved the day, multiple times, at great risk to himself; was a super loyal friend to both Luke and Chewy; and definitely met the above posters test about treating service workers and Older women with respect. He’s more on the mold of “a hooker with a heart of gold”—someone ho is inherently good but due to undefined life circumstances was forced a less than legal means of earning a living. (In fact, for someone living in a dictatorship, black market smuggling is often one of the more moral employment choices, as it’s often the only way decent people can get what they need. I definitely think Lucas chose the role of smuggler for Han with this in mind.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:2. "Why do some women choose the bad man, when they have access to a variety of both good and bad men who are equally attractive?" This is a harder question IMHO.

To continue the Star Wars metaphor, this is the struggle Leia had when she was interested in both Han Solo and Luke (before she knew Luke was her brother obviously).

Are you seriously suggesting that Mark Hamill and Harrison FOrd were equally attractive (especially at the point that Last Jedi or empire were filmed)???? Again, this boils down yo the fact that Harrison was astoundingly good looking, not the fact that he was a smuggler.
Besides, he’s not really a bad boy. He saved the day, multiple times, at great risk to himself; was a super loyal friend to both Luke and Chewy; and definitely met the above posters test about treating service workers and Older women with respect. He’s more on the mold of “a hooker with a heart of gold”—someone ho is inherently good but due to undefined life circumstances was forced a less than legal means of earning a living. (In fact, for someone living in a dictatorship, black market smuggling is often one of the more moral employment choices, as it’s often the only way decent people can get what they need. I definitely think Lucas chose the role of smuggler for Han with this in mind.)

He disregarded very clear statements and physical actions from Leia that she did not want to be romantically involved with him. But, sure. Heart of gold.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:2. "Why do some women choose the bad man, when they have access to a variety of both good and bad men who are equally attractive?" This is a harder question IMHO.

To continue the Star Wars metaphor, this is the struggle Leia had when she was interested in both Han Solo and Luke (before she knew Luke was her brother obviously).

Are you seriously suggesting that Mark Hamill and Harrison FOrd were equally attractive (especially at the point that Last Jedi or empire were filmed)???? Again, this boils down yo the fact that Harrison was astoundingly good looking, not the fact that he was a smuggler.
Besides, he’s not really a bad boy. He saved the day, multiple times, at great risk to himself; was a super loyal friend to both Luke and Chewy; and definitely met the above posters test about treating service workers and Older women with respect. He’s more on the mold of “a hooker with a heart of gold”—someone ho is inherently good but due to undefined life circumstances was forced a less than legal means of earning a living. (In fact, for someone living in a dictatorship, black market smuggling is often one of the more moral employment choices, as it’s often the only way decent people can get what they need. I definitely think Lucas chose the role of smuggler for Han with this in mind.)

He disregarded very clear statements and physical actions from Leia that she did not want to be romantically involved with him. But, sure. Heart of gold.

But she actually did........so there's that.

[Anonymous]

Six of one half dozen of the other ... same ballpark

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:2. "Why do some women choose the bad man, when they have access to a variety of both good and bad men who are equally attractive?" This is a harder question IMHO.

To continue the Star Wars metaphor, this is the struggle Leia had when she was interested in both Han Solo and Luke (before she knew Luke was her brother obviously).

Are you seriously suggesting that Mark Hamill and Harrison FOrd were equally attractive (especially at the point that Last Jedi or empire were filmed)???? Again, this boils down yo the fact that Harrison was astoundingly good looking, not the fact that he was a smuggler.
Besides, he’s not really a bad boy. He saved the day, multiple times, at great risk to himself; was a super loyal friend to both Luke and Chewy; and definitely met the above posters test about treating service workers and Older women with respect. He’s more on the mold of “a hooker with a heart of gold”—someone ho is inherently good but due to undefined life circumstances was forced a less than legal means of earning a living. (In fact, for someone living in a dictatorship, black market smuggling is often one of the more moral employment choices, as it’s often the only way decent people can get what they need. I definitely think Lucas chose the role of smuggler for Han with this in mind.)

He disregarded very clear statements and physical actions from Leia that she did not want to be romantically involved with him. But, sure. Heart of gold.

But she actually did........so there's that.

Sexy men know when "no" means "try harder."