Men: why do women like the bad boys so much?

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry, you're starting your question with "Men: Why do women..."? I think YOU are the problem

[Anonymous]

Why would you ask this question to a man? Wouldn't it make more sense to ask women why they like bad boys?

I don't really like bad boys. It's a great fantasy, but reality bites. My one sister does like the bad boys. She married one, and the marriage lasted all of 1.5 years. My other sister and I married kind of geeks (engineers), and we are both still married to those geeks +15 years.

[Anonymous]

I've posted this before, and will say it again. Most women do not like bad boys. They like hot men. A lot of hot men are jerks, because they can get away with it and because people have catered to them their whole lives because they were so good looking. (Hollywood is filled with these guys....).

Ugly bad boys don't get the women. Hot nice guys get even more women than hot bad boys. This is why guys who are pediatricians and other "helping" fields have a huge advantage. Give a woman two equally attractive men -- one is a pediatric onconlogist with a great relationship with his sisters; the other is a convicted felon who cheats on his girlfriends. I guarantee you that 99% of women are going to prefer the hot pediatrician.

The whole "women prefer bad boys" thing was invented by guys who are not good looking, to excuse why they aren't getting the women ("nice guys finish last"). The truth is that women are almost as shallow as men -- we also like our partners to be hot. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH here who was overlooked by my HS love as a "really sweet best friend, but not romantically" in favor of the bad guy.

The way it was explained to me by some women years later is that for girls in HS (and in unfortunate cases, even older women) who have limited self-confidence, they're enchanted by the fact that the bad boy who hates the system and is defiant toward the rules is somehow noticing them (the girl) and seeing the beauty in her, and her alone.

Even assuming that explanation is true, the problem is they didn't develop that preference in a vacuum, they were socially conditioned to believe that crap. It's not like they sat down, did a deeply introspective evaluation of what kind of guy they should get involved with, and decided that this was the best approach.

[Anonymous]

Back to the important part of the thread. Did you know Adam driver was a marine? His ted talk is pretty cool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've posted this before, and will say it again. Most women do not like bad boys. They like hot men. A lot of hot men are jerks, because they can get away with it and because people have catered to them their whole lives because they were so good looking. (Hollywood is filled with these guys....).

Ugly bad boys don't get the women. Hot nice guys get even more women than hot bad boys. This is why guys who are pediatricians and other "helping" fields have a huge advantage. Give a woman two equally attractive men -- one is a pediatric onconlogist with a great relationship with his sisters; the other is a convicted felon who cheats on his girlfriends. I guarantee you that 99% of women are going to prefer the hot pediatrician.

The whole "women prefer bad boys" thing was invented by guys who are not good looking, to excuse why they aren't getting the women ("nice guys finish last"). The truth is that women are almost as shallow as men -- we also like our partners to be hot. Sorry.

Exactly, I like hot guys but they also have to be well educated, from a good family, responsible, nice and kind with good manners. I like a gentleman.

Never been attracted to men who don’t treat me well and generally are irresponsible and unreliable. Why would you want someone like that as a boyfriend or husband or even a friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've posted this before, and will say it again. Most women do not like bad boys. They like hot men. A lot of hot men are jerks, because they can get away with it and because people have catered to them their whole lives because they were so good looking. (Hollywood is filled with these guys....).

Ugly bad boys don't get the women. Hot nice guys get even more women than hot bad boys. This is why guys who are pediatricians and other "helping" fields have a huge advantage. Give a woman two equally attractive men -- one is a pediatric onconlogist with a great relationship with his sisters; the other is a convicted felon who cheats on his girlfriends. I guarantee you that 99% of women are going to prefer the hot pediatrician.

The whole "women prefer bad boys" thing was invented by guys who are not good looking, to excuse why they aren't getting the women ("nice guys finish last"). The truth is that women are almost as shallow as men -- we also like our partners to be hot. Sorry.

SO true about the lust.
And the self appointed "nice guys" are often whiny babies. I'll take an upfront but truthful asshole without an ulterior motive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH here who was overlooked by my HS love as a "really sweet best friend, but not romantically" in favor of the bad guy.

The way it was explained to me by some women years later is that for girls in HS (and in unfortunate cases, even older women) who have limited self-confidence, they're enchanted by the fact that the bad boy who hates the system and is defiant toward the rules is somehow noticing them (the girl) and seeing the beauty in her, and her alone.

Yeah no, this is just gross. Your "HS love" did not owe you her romantic affection just because you perceived yourself as nicer than the other guy. I have plenty of male friends I like as friends that I will never be romantically interested in, whether or not they are themselves in love with me. I have also had crushes on many guys, of varying levels of "niceness" or "badness," that weren't returned, but I'm not of such low self-esteem myself that I get all sour grapes about it - I can accept that I just didn't give them "the feelings." Sorry, buddy, she just wasn't that into you. Deal with it, sheesh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've posted this before, and will say it again. Most women do not like bad boys. They like hot men. A lot of hot men are jerks, because they can get away with it and because people have catered to them their whole lives because they were so good looking. (Hollywood is filled with these guys....).

Ugly bad boys don't get the women. Hot nice guys get even more women than hot bad boys. This is why guys who are pediatricians and other "helping" fields have a huge advantage. Give a woman two equally attractive men -- one is a pediatric onconlogist with a great relationship with his sisters; the other is a convicted felon who cheats on his girlfriends. I guarantee you that 99% of women are going to prefer the hot pediatrician.

The whole "women prefer bad boys" thing was invented by guys who are not good looking, to excuse why they aren't getting the women ("nice guys finish last"). The truth is that women are almost as shallow as men -- we also like our partners to be hot. Sorry.

SO true about the lust.
And the self appointed "nice guys" are often whiny babies. I'll take an upfront but truthful asshole without an ulterior motive.

YES. EXACTLY.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Being the subejct of this fasciantion (or not), do you have any ideas as to why this might be?

I was reminded of this by a thread on the entertainment board where the posters are crushing on Kylo Ren from the latest Star Wars movie. One poster even said "he's a mass murderer but sooo sexy."

It's concerning to me that all the fans are hot for Reylo. It's such an abusive dynamic between them. At one point he actually says to her like "you're nothing. But not to me." That kind of mind twisting is straight out of bad boyfriend 101. It reminds me so much of the Fifty Shades of Gray franchise.

Why is it that girls can't help but be drawn to guys who say things like "you're nothing and nobody. But not to me."

Because most people are brainwashed in school and media to be sheeple.

[Anonymous]

Here's some research on the topic:
https://scholar.google.com/scholar?hl=en&as_sdt=0%2C10&q=%22bad+boy%22+women+men+sex+attractiveness&btnG=

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here who was overlooked by my HS love as a "really sweet best friend, but not romantically" in favor of the bad guy.

The way it was explained to me by some women years later is that for girls in HS (and in unfortunate cases, even older women) who have limited self-confidence, they're enchanted by the fact that the bad boy who hates the system and is defiant toward the rules is somehow noticing them (the girl) and seeing the beauty in her, and her alone.

Yeah no, this is just gross. Your "HS love" did not owe you her romantic affection just because you perceived yourself as nicer than the other guy. I have plenty of male friends I like as friends that I will never be romantically interested in, whether or not they are themselves in love with me. I have also had crushes on many guys, of varying levels of "niceness" or "badness," that weren't returned, but I'm not of such low self-esteem myself that I get all sour grapes about it - I can accept that I just didn't give them "the feelings." Sorry, buddy, she just wasn't that into you. Deal with it, sheesh.

Since the poster never claimed anyone owed him anything, you're pretending to argue against a point he didn't make.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've posted this before, and will say it again. Most women do not like bad boys. They like hot men. A lot of hot men are jerks, because they can get away with it and because people have catered to them their whole lives because they were so good looking. (Hollywood is filled with these guys....).

Ugly bad boys don't get the women. Hot nice guys get even more women than hot bad boys. This is why guys who are pediatricians and other "helping" fields have a huge advantage. Give a woman two equally attractive men -- one is a pediatric onconlogist with a great relationship with his sisters; the other is a convicted felon who cheats on his girlfriends. I guarantee you that 99% of women are going to prefer the hot pediatrician.

The whole "women prefer bad boys" thing was invented by guys who are not good looking, to excuse why they aren't getting the women ("nice guys finish last"). The truth is that women are almost as shallow as men -- we also like our partners to be hot. Sorry.

So you are saying most women want them all: good looks and good money. What a surprise!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've posted this before, and will say it again. Most women do not like bad boys. They like hot men. A lot of hot men are jerks, because they can get away with it and because people have catered to them their whole lives because they were so good looking. (Hollywood is filled with these guys....).

Ugly bad boys don't get the women. Hot nice guys get even more women than hot bad boys. This is why guys who are pediatricians and other "helping" fields have a huge advantage. Give a woman two equally attractive men -- one is a pediatric onconlogist with a great relationship with his sisters; the other is a convicted felon who cheats on his girlfriends. I guarantee you that 99% of women are going to prefer the hot pediatrician.

The whole "women prefer bad boys" thing was invented by guys who are not good looking, to excuse why they aren't getting the women ("nice guys finish last"). The truth is that women are almost as shallow as men -- we also like our partners to be hot. Sorry.

So you are saying most women want them all: good looks and good money. What a surprise!

ding, ding, ding

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH here who was overlooked by my HS love as a "really sweet best friend, but not romantically" in favor of the bad guy.

The way it was explained to me by some women years later is that for girls in HS (and in unfortunate cases, even older women) who have limited self-confidence, they're enchanted by the fact that the bad boy who hates the system and is defiant toward the rules is somehow noticing them (the girl) and seeing the beauty in her, and her alone.

Romance for the win, right? Right. It’s rare, often unhealthy. But that explanation would address a lot of otherwise confusing and negative behavioral dynamics in these scenarios.