DD meeting her boyfriend’s parents for the first time, we are both REALLY worried

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She should be herself. If they're too deep into MAGA, then the relationship isn't going to work. Better to find out now.

She never said MAGA. Just stop

"Pretty conservative on some matters" means MAGA. Don't be naive.

So closed minded. Why am I not surprised?!?!

[Anonymous]

How did so many people go from OP saying the parents were conservative in some areas to assuming they’re crazy MAGA. Surely people know many people who may have been raised in a conservative home but aren’t remotely MAGA.

Also, why do so many people seem ok with the DD acting over the top and outrageous. Whether the parents share the same political beliefs or not, shouldn’t people exercise some sort of good manners upon meeting anyone for the first time? No one is saying the daughter shouldn’t feel comfortable answering or asking questions honestly. But she sounds kind of rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As Mel Robbins would say, “Let them.” This isn’t your issue to deal with. Presumably the BF has seen this side of your daughter and is comfortable introducing her to his parents.

Just so you know, Mel Robbins did not come up with that term, but she sure made a lot of money off of using someone else’s idea.

Whose idea was it? Genuinely asking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How did so many people go from OP saying the parents were conservative in some areas to assuming they’re crazy MAGA. Surely people know many people who may have been raised in a conservative home but aren’t remotely MAGA.

Also, why do so many people seem ok with the DD acting over the top and outrageous. Whether the parents share the same political beliefs or not, shouldn’t people exercise some sort of good manners upon meeting anyone for the first time? No one is saying the daughter shouldn’t feel comfortable answering or asking questions honestly. But she sounds kind of rude.

I don't know anyone that would still describe themselves as "conservative" that isn't MAGA. At least, not without immediately and explicitly distancing themselves from MAGA when using the "conservative" term.

[Anonymous]

Not your problem. Your child is a twenty two year adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How did so many people go from OP saying the parents were conservative in some areas to assuming they’re crazy MAGA. Surely people know many people who may have been raised in a conservative home but aren’t remotely MAGA.

Also, why do so many people seem ok with the DD acting over the top and outrageous. Whether the parents share the same political beliefs or not, shouldn’t people exercise some sort of good manners upon meeting anyone for the first time? No one is saying the daughter shouldn’t feel comfortable answering or asking questions honestly. But she sounds kind of rude.

I don't know anyone that would still describe themselves as "conservative" that isn't MAGA. At least, not without immediately and explicitly distancing themselves from MAGA when using the "conservative" term.

I disagree. I’m a conservative in many ways but have never supported the MAGA movement. To me those are such different values that your link is not obvious. Also dont’t forget it’s OP who characterizes them this way. I thought she meant in terms of manners, respect due to elders, etc. Since I’m an East Asian immigrant, I was envisioning something like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How did so many people go from OP saying the parents were conservative in some areas to assuming they’re crazy MAGA. Surely people know many people who may have been raised in a conservative home but aren’t remotely MAGA.

Also, why do so many people seem ok with the DD acting over the top and outrageous. Whether the parents share the same political beliefs or not, shouldn’t people exercise some sort of good manners upon meeting anyone for the first time? No one is saying the daughter shouldn’t feel comfortable answering or asking questions honestly. But she sounds kind of rude.

I don't know anyone that would still describe themselves as "conservative" that isn't MAGA. At least, not without immediately and explicitly distancing themselves from MAGA when using the "conservative" term.

OP never said MAGA. She said the parents were conservative. How do you know they wouldn’t say exactly that, that they are conservative and explicitly not MAGA.

But what does that have to do with the DD being polite? You can be polite and still stand your ground should political issues come up. But also, what group discusses politics in their first meeting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How did so many people go from OP saying the parents were conservative in some areas to assuming they’re crazy MAGA. Surely people know many people who may have been raised in a conservative home but aren’t remotely MAGA.

Also, why do so many people seem ok with the DD acting over the top and outrageous. Whether the parents share the same political beliefs or not, shouldn’t people exercise some sort of good manners upon meeting anyone for the first time? No one is saying the daughter shouldn’t feel comfortable answering or asking questions honestly. But she sounds kind of rude.

I don't know anyone that would still describe themselves as "conservative" that isn't MAGA. At least, not without immediately and explicitly distancing themselves from MAGA when using the "conservative" term.

You're wrong, but also, the parents arent the ones describing themselves here. It's OP, mother of a girl who is dating the son of these people. Even OPs daughter has never met these people, crazy to make all of these assumptions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How did so many people go from OP saying the parents were conservative in some areas to assuming they’re crazy MAGA. Surely people know many people who may have been raised in a conservative home but aren’t remotely MAGA.

Also, why do so many people seem ok with the DD acting over the top and outrageous. Whether the parents share the same political beliefs or not, shouldn’t people exercise some sort of good manners upon meeting anyone for the first time? No one is saying the daughter shouldn’t feel comfortable answering or asking questions honestly. But she sounds kind of rude.

+1
My parents and I are all very liberal democrats but more conservative, in the traditional sense, than any republicans I've ever known. We have a great respect for decorum, manners, decency and respect for elders. I read op in that way but if they were maga, expect more trashy blowhard behavior than your daughter could muster.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How did so many people go from OP saying the parents were conservative in some areas to assuming they’re crazy MAGA. Surely people know many people who may have been raised in a conservative home but aren’t remotely MAGA.

Also, why do so many people seem ok with the DD acting over the top and outrageous. Whether the parents share the same political beliefs or not, shouldn’t people exercise some sort of good manners upon meeting anyone for the first time? No one is saying the daughter shouldn’t feel comfortable answering or asking questions honestly. But she sounds kind of rude.

+1
My parents and I are all very liberal democrats but more conservative, in the traditional sense, than any republicans I've ever known. We have a great respect for decorum, manners, decency and respect for elders. I read op in that way but if they were maga, expect more trashy blowhard behavior than your daughter could muster.

So you're a MAGA apologist. That's almost as bad. MAGAs should be called out and ostracized at every opportunity.

[Anonymous]

It can both be true that these parents are too fussy/conservative and that DD needs to develop a filter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How did so many people go from OP saying the parents were conservative in some areas to assuming they’re crazy MAGA. Surely people know many people who may have been raised in a conservative home but aren’t remotely MAGA.

Also, why do so many people seem ok with the DD acting over the top and outrageous. Whether the parents share the same political beliefs or not, shouldn’t people exercise some sort of good manners upon meeting anyone for the first time? No one is saying the daughter shouldn’t feel comfortable answering or asking questions honestly. But she sounds kind of rude.

I don't know anyone that would still describe themselves as "conservative" that isn't MAGA. At least, not without immediately and explicitly distancing themselves from MAGA when using the "conservative" term.

OP never said MAGA. She said the parents were conservative. How do you know they wouldn’t say exactly that, that they are conservative and explicitly not MAGA.

But what does that have to do with the DD being polite? You can be polite and still stand your ground should political issues come up. But also, what group discusses politics in their first meeting.

In Trump's time, no one is going to use the "conservative" word unless they mean MAGA. Don't be so naive.

Regardless, it doesn't even matter. This is the chance for the daughter to find out if they're MAGA. If they're not, great. Hopefully they still want women to be able to vote and not force them into back-alley birth control. But that would be good to find out, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let her run her mouth and get dumped. The only way to learn is the hard way.

If the parents are as bad the OP fears, she'll probably be the one doing the dumping.

Then what is she worried about?

I don't think the OP is a reliable narrator here. She's at least withholding a lot of relevant details.

My guess is that the OP is also MAGA but doesn't want to admit it here.

That doesn't explain why the daughter is worried. If she's worried she'll watch her mouth and be on her best behavior. OP is probably worried b/c her daughter's bad manners reflect badly on her for being indulgent and permissive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It can both be true that these parents are too fussy/conservative and that DD needs to develop a filter.

I agree with that. I just disagree with the notion that this is a good time to apply that filter. She should be very direct with the intent of getting direct responses back. MAGAs know their beliefs are abhorrent to most educated individuals and will sometimes try to hide them when they will face unpleasant consequences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let her run her mouth and get dumped. The only way to learn is the hard way.

If the parents are as bad the OP fears, she'll probably be the one doing the dumping.

Then what is she worried about?

I don't think the OP is a reliable narrator here. She's at least withholding a lot of relevant details.

My guess is that the OP is also MAGA but doesn't want to admit it here.

That doesn't explain why the daughter is worried. If she's worried she'll watch her mouth and be on her best behavior. OP is probably worried b/c her daughter's bad manners reflect badly on her for being indulgent and permissive.

Who's to say she is? Or what she's really worried about? Maybe she's worried they're going to be MAGA. The Op hasn't been up front here.