What are your rules about smoking pot at home?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they didn’t stop I’d change the locks. Neither of their grandparents would take them in either if they used drugs. Thankfully we raised responsible children and we don’t have issues like this.

You are absolutely insane. I’m sure this kind of crazy came out about different things in their childhood so don’t be surprised when they choose to cut you out.

Are you upset that we’ve raised normal, healthy, happy, intelligent, high functioning children?

You mean they turned out great in spite of how awful you are? Why would I be upset about that?

But YOU should be upset that you would proudly throw your amazing children into the street because of something as minor as pot.

Huh? If the prior poster raised responsible, normal, healthy, happy, intelligent, high functioning children, who will not smoke pot - it just signifies that the kids have turned out great because the parents have done a great job in raising them - why would the kids then need to be thrown into the street?

Your circular reasoning is just not making sense.

Are you smoking pot?

- DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is new for us. Our college student is home for the summer and is smoking pot. I don’t like it and need to lay down some ground rules. If I say no pot at home, I don’t want to push them to go somewhere unsafe to smoke. I want them to stop completely. I have a high school-aged child and home and don’t want this around him either. How are you handling a pot-smoking young adult under your roof?

If you are serious about it, drug testing as a condition of paying tuition and living in your home rent-free. If they don't want to do this, you can help them find other options for this fall. They are over 18, they can decide if this is worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they didn’t stop I’d change the locks. Neither of their grandparents would take them in either if they used drugs. Thankfully we raised responsible children and we don’t have issues like this.

You are absolutely insane. I’m sure this kind of crazy came out about different things in their childhood so don’t be surprised when they choose to cut you out.

Are you upset that we’ve raised normal, healthy, happy, intelligent, high functioning children?

You mean they turned out great in spite of how awful you are? Why would I be upset about that?

But YOU should be upset that you would proudly throw your amazing children into the street because of something as minor as pot.

Huh? If the prior poster raised responsible, normal, healthy, happy, intelligent, high functioning children, who will not smoke pot - it just signifies that the kids have turned out great because the parents have done a great job in raising them - why would the kids then need to be thrown into the street?

Your circular reasoning is just not making sense.

Are you smoking pot?

- DP

I love how my circular reasoning isn't making sense yet you completely misunderstood and mischaracterized what I was saying.

Any parent who would "change the locks" and disown his/her children for a minor infraction is a shit parent in my book. I was not commenting on how the children turned out. I was commenting on the idea that he/she is willing to let her children be homeless because they smoked pot. That is about as horrible as you can be as a parent.

Guaranteed both of you drink and have smoked pot in the past.

[Anonymous]

We don't allow anyone to smoke in our home or yard. Gross.

[Anonymous]

I love how my circular reasoning isn't making sense yet you completely misunderstood and mischaracterized what I was saying.

Any parent who would "change the locks" and disown his/her children for a minor infraction is a shit parent in my book. I was not commenting on how the children turned out. I was commenting on the idea that he/she is willing to let her children be homeless because they smoked pot. That is about as horrible as you can be as a parent.

Guaranteed both of you drink and have smoked pot in the past.

NP who just read through this thread. You do understand that most of the adults on this thread disagree with you and actually set boundaries at home because they recognize the dangers of pot? Having consequences for violating those boundaries does not make one a horrible parent. In fact, a parent allowing a child to use drugs at home at will is a far worse example of parenting. Read about the dangers of today's strain of pot versus 20 years ago (and that's without the added danger of fentanyl) and what happens to kids who become addicted. YOU are the parent who I try to have my kids avoid - the one who thinks they are progressive and cool and stands by while their kid makes destructive decisions. And no, I have not smoked pot ever because I saw how it was the gateway to my sibling completely destroying their life and the wreckage that left for the rest of the family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I love how my circular reasoning isn't making sense yet you completely misunderstood and mischaracterized what I was saying.

Any parent who would "change the locks" and disown his/her children for a minor infraction is a shit parent in my book. I was not commenting on how the children turned out. I was commenting on the idea that he/she is willing to let her children be homeless because they smoked pot. That is about as horrible as you can be as a parent.

Guaranteed both of you drink and have smoked pot in the past.

NP who just read through this thread. You do understand that most of the adults on this thread disagree with you and actually set boundaries at home because they recognize the dangers of pot? Having consequences for violating those boundaries does not make one a horrible parent. In fact, a parent allowing a child to use drugs at home at will is a far worse example of parenting. Read about the dangers of today's strain of pot versus 20 years ago (and that's without the added danger of fentanyl) and what happens to kids who become addicted. YOU are the parent who I try to have my kids avoid - the one who thinks they are progressive and cool and stands by while their kid makes destructive decisions. And no, I have not smoked pot ever because I saw how it was the gateway to my sibling completely destroying their life and the wreckage that left for the rest of the family.

Do you realize that I am not commenting on setting boundaries? I'm commenting on "we would change the locks and the grandparents wouldn't take them in either." That kind of black and white, hystrionic thinking is shitty parenting, ESPECAILLY given that we are talking about adults here.

I never said I would allow pot smoking in my house.

The rest of your post is just nonsense I don't care to read or comment on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I love how my circular reasoning isn't making sense yet you completely misunderstood and mischaracterized what I was saying.

Any parent who would "change the locks" and disown his/her children for a minor infraction is a shit parent in my book. I was not commenting on how the children turned out. I was commenting on the idea that he/she is willing to let her children be homeless because they smoked pot. That is about as horrible as you can be as a parent.

Guaranteed both of you drink and have smoked pot in the past.

NP who just read through this thread. You do understand that most of the adults on this thread disagree with you and actually set boundaries at home because they recognize the dangers of pot? Having consequences for violating those boundaries does not make one a horrible parent. In fact, a parent allowing a child to use drugs at home at will is a far worse example of parenting. Read about the dangers of today's strain of pot versus 20 years ago (and that's without the added danger of fentanyl) and what happens to kids who become addicted. YOU are the parent who I try to have my kids avoid - the one who thinks they are progressive and cool and stands by while their kid makes destructive decisions. And no, I have not smoked pot ever because I saw how it was the gateway to my sibling completely destroying their life and the wreckage that left for the rest of the family.

Do you realize that I am not commenting on setting boundaries? I'm commenting on "we would change the locks and the grandparents wouldn't take them in either." That kind of black and white, hystrionic thinking is shitty parenting, ESPECAILLY given that we are talking about adults here.

I never said I would allow pot smoking in my house.

The rest of your post is just nonsense I don't care to read or comment on.

“Speak softly and carry a big stick.”

Teddy R.

I realize authority, expectations, boundaries and consequences aren’t popular with most DCUMs but the combination of those principles works wonders when raising children.

We said what we meant and we meant what we said. Our children knew that. We gave them an great deal of freedom during their childhood and they rarely let us down.

Our children don’t do drugs. I’m confident they never will. Allowing your children to do drugs is as bad as parenting gets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I love how my circular reasoning isn't making sense yet you completely misunderstood and mischaracterized what I was saying.

Any parent who would "change the locks" and disown his/her children for a minor infraction is a shit parent in my book. I was not commenting on how the children turned out. I was commenting on the idea that he/she is willing to let her children be homeless because they smoked pot. That is about as horrible as you can be as a parent.

Guaranteed both of you drink and have smoked pot in the past.

NP who just read through this thread. You do understand that most of the adults on this thread disagree with you and actually set boundaries at home because they recognize the dangers of pot? Having consequences for violating those boundaries does not make one a horrible parent. In fact, a parent allowing a child to use drugs at home at will is a far worse example of parenting. Read about the dangers of today's strain of pot versus 20 years ago (and that's without the added danger of fentanyl) and what happens to kids who become addicted. YOU are the parent who I try to have my kids avoid - the one who thinks they are progressive and cool and stands by while their kid makes destructive decisions. And no, I have not smoked pot ever because I saw how it was the gateway to my sibling completely destroying their life and the wreckage that left for the rest of the family.

Do you realize that I am not commenting on setting boundaries? I'm commenting on "we would change the locks and the grandparents wouldn't take them in either." That kind of black and white, hystrionic thinking is shitty parenting, ESPECAILLY given that we are talking about adults here.

I never said I would allow pot smoking in my house.

The rest of your post is just nonsense I don't care to read or comment on.

“Speak softly and carry a big stick.”

Teddy R.

I realize authority, expectations, boundaries and consequences aren’t popular with most DCUMs but the combination of those principles works wonders when raising children.

We said what we meant and we meant what we said. Our children knew that. We gave them an great deal of freedom during their childhood and they rarely let us down.

Our children don’t do drugs. I’m confident they never will. Allowing your children to do drugs is as bad as parenting gets.

Please point to where I said I allow my child to do drugs.

I know you're desperate, but surely you can say whatever it is you need to say without lying.

I'll say it again, if you have to take such drastic measures as to make your children homeless for a fairly minor infraction (smoking pot is not the same as doing drugs) then you have failed as a parent and as a person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I love how my circular reasoning isn't making sense yet you completely misunderstood and mischaracterized what I was saying.

Any parent who would "change the locks" and disown his/her children for a minor infraction is a shit parent in my book. I was not commenting on how the children turned out. I was commenting on the idea that he/she is willing to let her children be homeless because they smoked pot. That is about as horrible as you can be as a parent.

Guaranteed both of you drink and have smoked pot in the past.

NP who just read through this thread. You do understand that most of the adults on this thread disagree with you and actually set boundaries at home because they recognize the dangers of pot? Having consequences for violating those boundaries does not make one a horrible parent. In fact, a parent allowing a child to use drugs at home at will is a far worse example of parenting. Read about the dangers of today's strain of pot versus 20 years ago (and that's without the added danger of fentanyl) and what happens to kids who become addicted. YOU are the parent who I try to have my kids avoid - the one who thinks they are progressive and cool and stands by while their kid makes destructive decisions. And no, I have not smoked pot ever because I saw how it was the gateway to my sibling completely destroying their life and the wreckage that left for the rest of the family.

Do you realize that I am not commenting on setting boundaries? I'm commenting on "we would change the locks and the grandparents wouldn't take them in either." That kind of black and white, hystrionic thinking is shitty parenting, ESPECAILLY given that we are talking about adults here.

I never said I would allow pot smoking in my house.

The rest of your post is just nonsense I don't care to read or comment on.

“Speak softly and carry a big stick.”

Teddy R.

I realize authority, expectations, boundaries and consequences aren’t popular with most DCUMs but the combination of those principles works wonders when raising children.

We said what we meant and we meant what we said. Our children knew that. We gave them an great deal of freedom during their childhood and they rarely let us down.

Our children don’t do drugs. I’m confident they never will. Allowing your children to do drugs is as bad as parenting gets.

Please point to where I said I allow my child to do drugs.

I know you're desperate, but surely you can say whatever it is you need to say without lying.

I'll say it again, if you have to take such drastic measures as to make your children homeless for a fairly minor infraction (smoking pot is not the same as doing drugs) then you have failed as a parent and as a person.

Are you currently using drugs? Please point to where I said you allow your children to use drugs?

When did I say I ever had to lock my child out of the house. That we’re serious about accountability takes care of almost every potential problem. Our children are intelligent enough to weigh whether the time is worth the crime.

You’re incredibly defensive about this topic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I love how my circular reasoning isn't making sense yet you completely misunderstood and mischaracterized what I was saying.

Any parent who would "change the locks" and disown his/her children for a minor infraction is a shit parent in my book. I was not commenting on how the children turned out. I was commenting on the idea that he/she is willing to let her children be homeless because they smoked pot. That is about as horrible as you can be as a parent.

Guaranteed both of you drink and have smoked pot in the past.

NP who just read through this thread. You do understand that most of the adults on this thread disagree with you and actually set boundaries at home because they recognize the dangers of pot? Having consequences for violating those boundaries does not make one a horrible parent. In fact, a parent allowing a child to use drugs at home at will is a far worse example of parenting. Read about the dangers of today's strain of pot versus 20 years ago (and that's without the added danger of fentanyl) and what happens to kids who become addicted. YOU are the parent who I try to have my kids avoid - the one who thinks they are progressive and cool and stands by while their kid makes destructive decisions. And no, I have not smoked pot ever because I saw how it was the gateway to my sibling completely destroying their life and the wreckage that left for the rest of the family.

Do you realize that I am not commenting on setting boundaries? I'm commenting on "we would change the locks and the grandparents wouldn't take them in either." That kind of black and white, hystrionic thinking is shitty parenting, ESPECAILLY given that we are talking about adults here.

I never said I would allow pot smoking in my house.

The rest of your post is just nonsense I don't care to read or comment on.

“Speak softly and carry a big stick.”

Teddy R.

I realize authority, expectations, boundaries and consequences aren’t popular with most DCUMs but the combination of those principles works wonders when raising children.

We said what we meant and we meant what we said. Our children knew that. We gave them an great deal of freedom during their childhood and they rarely let us down.

Our children don’t do drugs. I’m confident they never will. Allowing your children to do drugs is as bad as parenting gets.

Please point to where I said I allow my child to do drugs.

I know you're desperate, but surely you can say whatever it is you need to say without lying.

I'll say it again, if you have to take such drastic measures as to make your children homeless for a fairly minor infraction (smoking pot is not the same as doing drugs) then you have failed as a parent and as a person.

Are you currently using drugs? Please point to where I said you allow your children to use drugs?

When did I say I ever had to lock my child out of the house. That we’re serious about accountability takes care of almost every potential problem. Our children are intelligent enough to weigh whether the time is worth the crime.

You’re incredibly defensive about this topic.

I suspect you might be using drugs while typing this (see we can both do this nonsense). If you didn't say that you'd lock your children out, then I wasn't responding to you, was I? Learn how to read and follow the discussion. It's funny how I wasn't even talking to you but I'm the defensive one. Never change DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Love how some here have the only options to allow drugs in house or the ADULT offspring is homeless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I love how my circular reasoning isn't making sense yet you completely misunderstood and mischaracterized what I was saying.

Any parent who would "change the locks" and disown his/her children for a minor infraction is a shit parent in my book. I was not commenting on how the children turned out. I was commenting on the idea that he/she is willing to let her children be homeless because they smoked pot. That is about as horrible as you can be as a parent.

Guaranteed both of you drink and have smoked pot in the past.

NP who just read through this thread. You do understand that most of the adults on this thread disagree with you and actually set boundaries at home because they recognize the dangers of pot? Having consequences for violating those boundaries does not make one a horrible parent. In fact, a parent allowing a child to use drugs at home at will is a far worse example of parenting. Read about the dangers of today's strain of pot versus 20 years ago (and that's without the added danger of fentanyl) and what happens to kids who become addicted. YOU are the parent who I try to have my kids avoid - the one who thinks they are progressive and cool and stands by while their kid makes destructive decisions. And no, I have not smoked pot ever because I saw how it was the gateway to my sibling completely destroying their life and the wreckage that left for the rest of the family.

Do you realize that I am not commenting on setting boundaries? I'm commenting on "we would change the locks and the grandparents wouldn't take them in either." That kind of black and white, hystrionic thinking is shitty parenting, ESPECAILLY given that we are talking about adults here.

I never said I would allow pot smoking in my house.

The rest of your post is just nonsense I don't care to read or comment on.

“Speak softly and carry a big stick.”

Teddy R.

I realize authority, expectations, boundaries and consequences aren’t popular with most DCUMs but the combination of those principles works wonders when raising children.

We said what we meant and we meant what we said. Our children knew that. We gave them an great deal of freedom during their childhood and they rarely let us down.

Our children don’t do drugs. I’m confident they never will. Allowing your children to do drugs is as bad as parenting gets.

Please point to where I said I allow my child to do drugs.

I know you're desperate, but surely you can say whatever it is you need to say without lying.

I'll say it again, if you have to take such drastic measures as to make your children homeless for a fairly minor infraction (smoking pot is not the same as doing drugs) then you have failed as a parent and as a person.

Are you currently using drugs? Please point to where I said you allow your children to use drugs?

When did I say I ever had to lock my child out of the house. That we’re serious about accountability takes care of almost every potential problem. Our children are intelligent enough to weigh whether the time is worth the crime.

You’re incredibly defensive about this topic.

I suspect you might be using drugs while typing this (see we can both do this nonsense). If you didn't say that you'd lock your children out, then I wasn't responding to you, was I? Learn how to read and follow the discussion. It's funny how I wasn't even talking to you but I'm the defensive one. Never change DCUM.

I’m the OP with the locksmith’s number saved in my phone. You obviously have lost track of the conversation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Love how some here have the only options to allow drugs in house or the ADULT offspring is homeless.

Adult home from college: Hi, Mom. Here’s my laundry. What’s for dinner? I’m home from college!
[adult home from college lights up to smoke in house]
Parent: Hey, no smoking in house, rules haven’t changed since you’ve been at college.
Adult home from college: Lighten up, I’m an adult now. Oh and wake me tomorrow at noon, I’m meeting friends for lunch. I’ll need cash.
[parent hands over cash, does laundry, makes dinner, sets reminder to wake at noon and says nothing more about smoking so adult home from college won’t end up homeless]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Love how some here have the only options to allow drugs in house or the ADULT offspring is homeless.

Exactly! No middle middle ground. It's quite sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I love how my circular reasoning isn't making sense yet you completely misunderstood and mischaracterized what I was saying.

Any parent who would "change the locks" and disown his/her children for a minor infraction is a shit parent in my book. I was not commenting on how the children turned out. I was commenting on the idea that he/she is willing to let her children be homeless because they smoked pot. That is about as horrible as you can be as a parent.

Guaranteed both of you drink and have smoked pot in the past.

NP who just read through this thread. You do understand that most of the adults on this thread disagree with you and actually set boundaries at home because they recognize the dangers of pot? Having consequences for violating those boundaries does not make one a horrible parent. In fact, a parent allowing a child to use drugs at home at will is a far worse example of parenting. Read about the dangers of today's strain of pot versus 20 years ago (and that's without the added danger of fentanyl) and what happens to kids who become addicted. YOU are the parent who I try to have my kids avoid - the one who thinks they are progressive and cool and stands by while their kid makes destructive decisions. And no, I have not smoked pot ever because I saw how it was the gateway to my sibling completely destroying their life and the wreckage that left for the rest of the family.

Do you realize that I am not commenting on setting boundaries? I'm commenting on "we would change the locks and the grandparents wouldn't take them in either." That kind of black and white, hystrionic thinking is shitty parenting, ESPECAILLY given that we are talking about adults here.

I never said I would allow pot smoking in my house.

The rest of your post is just nonsense I don't care to read or comment on.

“Speak softly and carry a big stick.”

Teddy R.

I realize authority, expectations, boundaries and consequences aren’t popular with most DCUMs but the combination of those principles works wonders when raising children.

We said what we meant and we meant what we said. Our children knew that. We gave them an great deal of freedom during their childhood and they rarely let us down.

Our children don’t do drugs. I’m confident they never will. Allowing your children to do drugs is as bad as parenting gets.

Please point to where I said I allow my child to do drugs.

I know you're desperate, but surely you can say whatever it is you need to say without lying.

I'll say it again, if you have to take such drastic measures as to make your children homeless for a fairly minor infraction (smoking pot is not the same as doing drugs) then you have failed as a parent and as a person.

Are you currently using drugs? Please point to where I said you allow your children to use drugs?

When did I say I ever had to lock my child out of the house. That we’re serious about accountability takes care of almost every potential problem. Our children are intelligent enough to weigh whether the time is worth the crime.

You’re incredibly defensive about this topic.

I suspect you might be using drugs while typing this (see we can both do this nonsense). If you didn't say that you'd lock your children out, then I wasn't responding to you, was I? Learn how to read and follow the discussion. It's funny how I wasn't even talking to you but I'm the defensive one. Never change DCUM.

I’m the OP with the locksmith’s number saved in my phone. You obviously have lost track of the conversation.

Yeah, I'm the one that lost track