DD Missed Try Outs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should not reach out to AD or Principal. Your dd should play on a club team, and keep improving, and attend the tryouts next year. If you reach out, even IF coach takes her this year because he has to, unless she's a true prodigy, she won't make the team again. And yes, if the 2 injured players, who have played for the coach before will heal before the season (meaning not an ACL for example), it IS appropriate to hold those 2 spots

And she likely won’t play.

She needs to take this as a life lesson to be responsible for making sure all bases are covered. She could’ve even asked a friend to reach out on her behalf.

Her only response to the coach should be along the lines of ‘thank you for the response. I’m disappointed that I missed the tryouts, but understand your rule. I’m joining club xxx to make sure I’m ready to go next year. Should a roster spot open this year, I’d love the opportunity to try out for it.’

Everyone who says this is a life lesson is being a dick. In the real world, people have empathy, which is something many of you lack. This is a kid who just lost a grandparent. It's not time for "teaching a life lesson."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry your daughter missed tryouts and I’m especially sorry for your loss. That would certainly be a valid reason in my book but it’s not surprising that in the world of HS athletics, they are inflexible. When one of my kids was in middle school he was registered for a non-school baseball tryout. He’d been really excited about playing but got a concussion a few weeks before. Since the tryout was months in advance of the season I asked if he could have a tryout a week later and was told that they didn’t make any exceptions. That meant waiting another year. He was disappointed but we accepted it. We later learned this was not in fact the policy for everyone. The world of sports is not always fair. My other son plays HS soccer and he has seen injured kids sit out tryouts but put on the roster because the coach had already seen enough the previous year or in preseason workouts.

Again, yeah it happens because most coaches are dicks, but thi is not how try outs are suppoesed to go. If Bobby ran a 4.4 40 in 2022 that doesn't mean he will run it in 2023. Ok, kids grow like weeds. They get fatter, slower, more awkward. The point of a try out is to collect data and make a fair decision. Lwtting a previous year player skip that is BS, espcially so if it is at the exclusion of others.

Call the AD. The coach is a public employee and he owes you a valid explanation. Demand it.

She didn't come to tryouts, the roster is full and final. That is a valid explanation. If OP goes to the AD "demanding" something she's not entitled to (her daughter on the team) she will ensure her daughter NEVER makes the team.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should not reach out to AD or Principal. Your dd should play on a club team, and keep improving, and attend the tryouts next year. If you reach out, even IF coach takes her this year because he has to, unless she's a true prodigy, she won't make the team again. And yes, if the 2 injured players, who have played for the coach before will heal before the season (meaning not an ACL for example), it IS appropriate to hold those 2 spots

And she likely won’t play.

She needs to take this as a life lesson to be responsible for making sure all bases are covered. She could’ve even asked a friend to reach out on her behalf.

Her only response to the coach should be along the lines of ‘thank you for the response. I’m disappointed that I missed the tryouts, but understand your rule. I’m joining club xxx to make sure I’m ready to go next year. Should a roster spot open this year, I’d love the opportunity to try out for it.’

Everyone who says this is a life lesson is being a dick. In the real world, people have empathy, which is something many of you lack. This is a kid who just lost a grandparent. It's not time for "teaching a life lesson."

So if OP"s daughter tries out and the coach decides to kick off one of the other players that showed up to try-outs and made the team--where's the empathy for that player?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should not reach out to AD or Principal. Your dd should play on a club team, and keep improving, and attend the tryouts next year. If you reach out, even IF coach takes her this year because he has to, unless she's a true prodigy, she won't make the team again. And yes, if the 2 injured players, who have played for the coach before will heal before the season (meaning not an ACL for example), it IS appropriate to hold those 2 spots

And she likely won’t play.

She needs to take this as a life lesson to be responsible for making sure all bases are covered. She could’ve even asked a friend to reach out on her behalf.

Her only response to the coach should be along the lines of ‘thank you for the response. I’m disappointed that I missed the tryouts, but understand your rule. I’m joining club xxx to make sure I’m ready to go next year. Should a roster spot open this year, I’d love the opportunity to try out for it.’

Everyone who says this is a life lesson is being a dick. In the real world, people have empathy, which is something many of you lack. This is a kid who just lost a grandparent. It's not time for "teaching a life lesson."

I have empathy for her…but the tryouts are over and the roster is set.

What are you suggesting anyone do?

[Anonymous]

Why didn’t she reach out when she first realized she was going to miss tryouts-like last Monday?

Was you power and internet out for a week?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Coach was not notified.... before her grandfather died... that he would die around try out.

There was no registration. It was "Be at Madison field 4pm Monday."

She reached out after the funeral, explained the family emergency, and her response was basically too bad so sad.

You and daughter both should have reached out and talked to the coach. If you had, then the coach is being crummy but since neither did not this is not the coaches faults find an opportunity outside of school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should not reach out to AD or Principal. Your dd should play on a club team, and keep improving, and attend the tryouts next year. If you reach out, even IF coach takes her this year because he has to, unless she's a true prodigy, she won't make the team again. And yes, if the 2 injured players, who have played for the coach before will heal before the season (meaning not an ACL for example), it IS appropriate to hold those 2 spots

And she likely won’t play.

She needs to take this as a life lesson to be responsible for making sure all bases are covered. She could’ve even asked a friend to reach out on her behalf.

Her only response to the coach should be along the lines of ‘thank you for the response. I’m disappointed that I missed the tryouts, but understand your rule. I’m joining club xxx to make sure I’m ready to go next year. Should a roster spot open this year, I’d love the opportunity to try out for it.’

Everyone who says this is a life lesson is being a dick. In the real world, people have empathy, which is something many of you lack. This is a kid who just lost a grandparent. It's not time for "teaching a life lesson."

This is absolutely a life lesson. She can send the email that the kind poster above wrote for her, play on her club team, work hard, and try out again next year. I'm sorry for your loss, but there is no guarantee that she would have made the team even if she had been there. There's no guarantee that she would have played if she made the team. It is not fair and will never be fair, but that doesn't mean that she can't rise above this challenge.

[Anonymous]

OP - very sorry for your loss. This happened to DD last year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should not reach out to AD or Principal. Your dd should play on a club team, and keep improving, and attend the tryouts next year. If you reach out, even IF coach takes her this year because he has to, unless she's a true prodigy, she won't make the team again. And yes, if the 2 injured players, who have played for the coach before will heal before the season (meaning not an ACL for example), it IS appropriate to hold those 2 spots

And she likely won’t play.

She needs to take this as a life lesson to be responsible for making sure all bases are covered. She could’ve even asked a friend to reach out on her behalf.

Her only response to the coach should be along the lines of ‘thank you for the response. I’m disappointed that I missed the tryouts, but understand your rule. I’m joining club xxx to make sure I’m ready to go next year. Should a roster spot open this year, I’d love the opportunity to try out for it.’

Everyone who says this is a life lesson is being a dick. In the real world, people have empathy, which is something many of you lack. This is a kid who just lost a grandparent. It's not time for "teaching a life lesson."

The coach can have empathy but that doesn’t mean he can change the fact that tryouts are over and the spots are filled. You seem to be missing the fact that the coach didn’t know the kid wanted to try out and filled all the spots.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[list]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the injured girls were on the team previously that was why their spots were held.

That's not how try outs work. Being on a team one season is not a promise to be on the team another season. You'd think someone on a sports forum would know that.

I'm sure someone on the sports forum would know that is how it works if they were starters.

Get off your high horse.

Nope, still isnt how it works. "Starters" have crap seasons all the time.

Bless your heart. Do you have kids who have actually played high school team sports? Of course that how it works. My kid was offered a sport on his high school basketball team in March of his eighth grade year. Sure he went to tryouts, but they were a formality. That’s how tryouts work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should not reach out to AD or Principal. Your dd should play on a club team, and keep improving, and attend the tryouts next year. If you reach out, even IF coach takes her this year because he has to, unless she's a true prodigy, she won't make the team again. And yes, if the 2 injured players, who have played for the coach before will heal before the season (meaning not an ACL for example), it IS appropriate to hold those 2 spots

And she likely won’t play.

She needs to take this as a life lesson to be responsible for making sure all bases are covered. She could’ve even asked a friend to reach out on her behalf.

Her only response to the coach should be along the lines of ‘thank you for the response. I’m disappointed that I missed the tryouts, but understand your rule. I’m joining club xxx to make sure I’m ready to go next year. Should a roster spot open this year, I’d love the opportunity to try out for it.’

Everyone who says this is a life lesson is being a dick. In the real world, people have empathy, which is something many of you lack. This is a kid who just lost a grandparent. It's not time for "teaching a life lesson."

The coach can have empathy but that doesn’t mean he can change the fact that tryouts are over and the spots are filled. You seem to be missing the fact that the coach didn’t know the kid wanted to try out and filled all the spots.

+1

This may well not even be within the coach’s power to change OP. The roster is filled.

[Anonymous]

OP how do you see this playing out in a positive manner? If you call the AD and the AD forces the coach to offer your DD a tryout and a spot on the roster, the coach will be so POed. Your DD won’t play, coach will not be happy all season, and will remember it all next tryout season.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I am sorry for your family's life.

NO!!!

My apologies, I am sorry for your family's LOSS. Damn autocorrect.

Thank you, it actually made me laugh!

You were very gracious!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should not reach out to AD or Principal. Your dd should play on a club team, and keep improving, and attend the tryouts next year. If you reach out, even IF coach takes her this year because he has to, unless she's a true prodigy, she won't make the team again. And yes, if the 2 injured players, who have played for the coach before will heal before the season (meaning not an ACL for example), it IS appropriate to hold those 2 spots

And she likely won’t play.

She needs to take this as a life lesson to be responsible for making sure all bases are covered. She could’ve even asked a friend to reach out on her behalf.

Her only response to the coach should be along the lines of ‘thank you for the response. I’m disappointed that I missed the tryouts, but understand your rule. I’m joining club xxx to make sure I’m ready to go next year. Should a roster spot open this year, I’d love the opportunity to try out for it.’

Everyone who says this is a life lesson is being a dick. In the real world, people have empathy, which is something many of you lack. This is a kid who just lost a grandparent. It's not time for "teaching a life lesson."

It's not about teaching her anything -- it isn't personal at all. They didn't build the team at her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you child's excuse was religion (like after sunset on Friday) or medical I think the coach is unreasonable. since the other girls reason was medical then it is reasonable.

Also, whether you like it or not, super stars get to make the team even if they are unable to make tryouts.

Sunset after Friday isn't unreasonable if the kid never told the coach ahead of time which you would have plenty of ability to do. If you just don't show up, the coach has no way of knowing why you didn't show up.

At our school it’s honored.

After the fact?
That's absurd. Jews observing the sabbath isn't something that just started last week. Observant Jews know in advance that they will not be able to make soccer tryouts after sundown on a Friday and should tell the coach ahead of time, not after the fact.

Our coaches are not so stupid they need to be told it's the Sabbath.