Question for older men who date much younger women

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

Not the PP answering you here. IN my experience, most of them are on bad terms with their parents.

Thaaaaat…makes a lot of sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

When you are a teenage man you quickly learn that it doesn’t matter one bit what her parents think about you. All that matters is what she thinks. If her parents hate you but she wants your D, then she will get your D.

“It doesn’t matter what her parents think” is even more true when she’s in her 20s and has her own place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been in relationships with younger women for about 15 years now. I'm dating a woman now who is 18 years younger than me.

-Do you go out in public on dates?
Absolutely. And younger women love to go out, dancing, bar hopping, etc. I love to be seen with her.

-Do your friends and family know about her?
Of course they do. Why not? Are you implying that I should keep her hidden?

-Do you see a long-term relationship or marriage happening?
I had a long-term, 10 year relationship with my last GF who was 14 years younger. We were talking marriage but she passed. My current relationship is too new to answer that question,

-Is it just to get through to the next “real” relationship?
Again, the implications in your question. Why would it not be a "real" relationship?

-What do you have to talk about?
Everything and anything although I will limit my discussions to things I know she will be aware of and not common knowledge of things before she was born. But I will kind of mansplain those times if I really want to talk about something from those years. Definitely, some of my musical interests include bands she has never heard of but that also makes it intersting.

Honestly, what’s your annual income and net worth ?

I drive a 12 year old Toyota, live in a very modest house I own, not high income at all or anything that shows signs of wealth except one very expensive hobby that I don't even mention for a while. Again, I like your implication that a younger woman only wants me for my money, or perceived wealth but you've failed at it. I will readily admit, as I've gotten older, the pool of women who are willing to date a man 12-20 years younger than me (the range I like) is small, but they are definitely out there and I've learned how to find them. The ratio of available women to men in this area is very favorable to men in general so I believe that does make it easier than most other places in the country. If I chose to date within my age range, or maybe just 5-10 years younger I could line up 3 dates a week for the rest of the year. But, no thanks. I will date women in that range, but it's a rare exception.

As a woman in my 40s I had just the same experience with lining up 2-3 dates a week with men within 5-10 years of my age. I do date a younger man now, but not because of his age bit sexual appeal and intelligence. He’s very highly educated and well travelled. He never dated an older woman before. I don’t date late 50s, they look unsexy to me. I do think it’s a matter of looks more than age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm mid 50s and male. I have never looked better, although I look more or less my age. (Maybe I look 5-10 years younger because I have been eating well, exercising, and dressing well lately.) My girlfriend is 20 years younger. She loves running her fingers through my salt and pepper hair and telling me how sexy it is.

I also have been very attracted to women my own age and older. based on those prior relationships, I completely agree with the prior comment that their hands, necks and faces age the most. Their sexual function seems different too. Though their bodies look fantastic, they seem slower to warm up and get lubricated than younger women. Forutnartely most of them still responded etremely well when I moved things along things slowly.

One thing that women of all ages have shown me is that a woman's sexul response depends a lot on where she is emotionally, how she is feeling at the moment, and how she likes to be held, touched, etc. I've had crazy hot sex for an extended period of time with a highly orgasmic woman who was almost 60, but she told me she went three years without having an O at the end of her marriage. I also totally flopped with a woman in her mid-30s. I couldn't get her off no matter what I did--she said she preferred much rougher men.

30s to me was the lowest libido age. Child birth really affected it, and I had multiple endometriosis related surgeries. It was insane high and fast multiple Os in my 20s. I remember being so wet it was slurping and sheets all wet. Men in early 30s were best marches sexually, we would spend many hours in bed and they could finish 3-4 times
In my 40s the libido from 20s is almost back now that my child is grown up. It does take longer to warm up (but there are good V creams for that, and it’s probably couple min difference). If a man is hot I still finish pretty fast, but men 5+ years older are more on same page with me in terms of tempo, amplitude and time it takes us both to O. I like finishing at the same time with him. A younger man has to finish first then rest then put it in again to let me finish.

It’s just different preferences depending on age. I can understand why 50 yo man would date a 30 yo women - it’s the lower libido years for women with kids, professional demanding jobs etc.

This is thing thats weird to me. People always assume that guys like women in their 20’s because they’re somehow prettier. I find women at every age attractive. Attractive people are attractive - go figure. And, I think this applies for both men and women. The real benefit to dating a younger woman (in the bedroom at least) isn’t the beauty, its the libido. It’s nice to not be the high libido partner for once trying to keep your sex lives from dying. Having a partner who also wants (like really wants) sex, initiates and wants to have fun is amazing. On the slurping part, that was pretty shocking too. Like I was pretty much struggling not to go crosseyed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The women I date, whether middle aged or younger, all want a real emotional connection, as do I, but they all care a lot about physical appearance and professional success.

The most attractive women in their 40s and 50s tend to choose men who are very attractive because they (the men) are athletic or byprofessionally successful. These women aren't necessarily sex maniacs or gold diggers. They are just going with the men they find most appealing.

I'm decent looking and fairly successful professionally so I'm doing ok with women 20 years younger to 10 years older. But I always know there's a risk any woman I'm with will try to upgrade. It's been a sad aspect of dating. I know this is tough for the women too.

Maybe you just can't get past "dating" stage to a commitment stage with someone.If she thinks you're not relationship oriented yes, she will keep looking. Women in their 40-50s don't want to be left single in their 60s. I hope to be solidly re-partnered by my 50, which is why I am dating. Not necessarily remarrying but sharing the same household and life plans for sure.

But the same applies to 20 something: they want to get married at some point.

Same here but the men who want to date me are in their 60s which means I’d be alone in my 60s.

So would be those 20 yo women if their 40 yo dates marry them. I’m 45 very slim and young looking, have no issues dating within 5 years of my own age. Current BF of 6 months is 1.5 years younger and very accomplished and mature. Being slim on dating market does change the game. You’ve got to be super slim, not just normal size. Men associate thin with youthfulness. Few women over 40 are like that but they attract majority of serious relationship minded men. I don’t want to brag, but I had 2-3 weekly dates and dozens of inquiries per day when I was looking. Ended up short listing an early 50s man and a 44 yo, eventually settling with the younger one. I actually thought the 50s yo guy was a better match sexually (took him longer to finish giving me more Os, younger men carry intercourse faster). But I had more in common (interests, lifestyle, aspirations) with someone around my own age. The 50s man didn’t believe in remarriage and seemed to have too much baggage.

Where are you meeting them? Is this all online?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

When you are a teenage man you quickly learn that it doesn’t matter one bit what her parents think about you. All that matters is what she thinks. If her parents hate you but she wants your D, then she will get your D.

“It doesn’t matter what her parents think” is even more true when she’s in her 20s and has her own place.

Interesting. This did not ring true for me or my circle (in my 20s OR 30s. Maybe in my teens, sure…), but I have a good / healthy relationship with my parents / am close with my dad, so that may be the difference (as a PP mentioned)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

When you are a teenage man you quickly learn that it doesn’t matter one bit what her parents think about you. All that matters is what she thinks. If her parents hate you but she wants your D, then she will get your D.

“It doesn’t matter what her parents think” is even more true when she’s in her 20s and has her own place.

Wait are we talking about dating/a real relationship, or having casual sex with? Big difference

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

When you are a teenage man you quickly learn that it doesn’t matter one bit what her parents think about you. All that matters is what she thinks. If her parents hate you but she wants your D, then she will get your D.

“It doesn’t matter what her parents think” is even more true when she’s in her 20s and has her own place.

Wait are we talking about dating/a real relationship, or having casual sex with? Big difference

Almost everyone I’ve dated in DC (20s or 40s) is not from here or their parents are way out in the suburbs, so this issue almost never come up. Dating, but when it’s a woman in her 20s, I might meet her friends but it’s never serious enough for family. It’s always going to end sooner or later and everyone knows that going in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

When you are a teenage man you quickly learn that it doesn’t matter one bit what her parents think about you. All that matters is what she thinks. If her parents hate you but she wants your D, then she will get your D.

“It doesn’t matter what her parents think” is even more true when she’s in her 20s and has her own place.

Wait are we talking about dating/a real relationship, or having casual sex with? Big difference

Almost everyone I’ve dated in DC (20s or 40s) is not from here or their parents are way out in the suburbs, so this issue almost never come up. Dating, but when it’s a woman in her 20s, I might meet her friends but it’s never serious enough for family. It’s always going to end sooner or later and everyone knows that going in.

What a sad waste of time. Those women are very foolish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

Not the PP answering you here. IN my experience, most of them are on bad terms with their parents.

Thaaaaat…makes a lot of sense.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

When you are a teenage man you quickly learn that it doesn’t matter one bit what her parents think about you. All that matters is what she thinks. If her parents hate you but she wants your D, then she will get your D.

“It doesn’t matter what her parents think” is even more true when she’s in her 20s and has her own place.

Wait are we talking about dating/a real relationship, or having casual sex with? Big difference

Almost everyone I’ve dated in DC (20s or 40s) is not from here or their parents are way out in the suburbs, so this issue almost never come up. Dating, but when it’s a woman in her 20s, I might meet her friends but it’s never serious enough for family. It’s always going to end sooner or later and everyone knows that going in.

What a sad waste of time. Those women are very foolish.

Yes, being 20 and dating someone 30+ is 99% of the time a foolish decision and an experience that lends itself to learning from. I myself learned a lot from dating someone I’m much older than myself, and specifically in my early 20s because I think there is something particularly foolish and naive about women that age. I noticed that women tend to learn and age out of this phase where they date an older man, but that the men who date significantly younger girls around 20 tend to remain in that state. It’s a maturity thing. For one cohort it’s a phase, for the other cohort I think it’s because something gets stunted whether intentional or not.

[Anonymous]

Good ol' DCUM. As you can see from this thread, when it's an older man dating a younger woman, people ask if he's rich; she has daddy issues etc.

Then some older women post about dating younger men, and no such questions...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

When you are a teenage man you quickly learn that it doesn’t matter one bit what her parents think about you. All that matters is what she thinks. If her parents hate you but she wants your D, then she will get your D.

“It doesn’t matter what her parents think” is even more true when she’s in her 20s and has her own place.

Wait are we talking about dating/a real relationship, or having casual sex with? Big difference

Almost everyone I’ve dated in DC (20s or 40s) is not from here or their parents are way out in the suburbs, so this issue almost never come up. Dating, but when it’s a woman in her 20s, I might meet her friends but it’s never serious enough for family. It’s always going to end sooner or later and everyone knows that going in.

What a sad waste of time. Those women are very foolish.

If a woman is 22 and says she doesn’t want to even think about marriage until she is late 20s, why is it a waste of time no matter what age she dates.

I’m 43 and have no illusions and am sure some day I’ll age out of being able to date women in their early 20s. I still date women in their 30s and 40s too, so I’ll just keep doing that when the time comes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

Not the PP answering you here. IN my experience, most of them are on bad terms with their parents.

My much younger gf is from an intact family and on excellent terms with both of her parents. And that's been the case for every 20s woman I have dated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I"m mid 40's and a lot of women I date are mid-20's. They are college-educated and inquisitive and we never lack of things to talk about.

I'm also good at "schmoozing" in general, like at networking events and such, so maybe that helps. And I do like Taylor Swift songs but I'm not as into it as they seem to be.

Wow - do their parents tend to hate you?? I don’t find a 50 year old dating a 35 year old remarkable, but mid 20s is YOUNG and that seems creepy

When I was 18, mid-20s seemed really, really old.