Click here for Bad Advice

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Need to hire a new cleaning person. Interviewed someone who said she uses Elbow Grease. Has anyone heard of this before? Appreciate honest reviews. House is 10,000 sq ft and I'm only interested in green and organic products. Trying to save the planet!

She should clean the house for free - the experience of being on your mansion is invaluable. When will she ever be in that type of home? She should be so lucky!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a real situation, but it makes me so mad that I need to just laugh about the whole thing or I'll lose my sanity, so please give me all the bad advice...

I've been in a long, difficult custody battle and my xH finally agreed to let me take DC out of state for a vacation. However, at the last minute, after I already bought plane tickets for 9am, he lets me know that he won't be handing over DC to me until the regularly scheduled custody exchange at 8am. When I told him we'd miss our flight if he did this, he sent me GIFs of crying babies.

My attorney says I can't administer electroshock therapy without a signed consent form. What should I do?

1- Get a a signed consent form.

2- Have sex with him, get pregnant and don’t give him the fetus.

3- Donuts with mustard and tuna.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a real situation, but it makes me so mad that I need to just laugh about the whole thing or I'll lose my sanity, so please give me all the bad advice...

I've been in a long, difficult custody battle and my xH finally agreed to let me take DC out of state for a vacation. However, at the last minute, after I already bought plane tickets for 9am, he lets me know that he won't be handing over DC to me until the regularly scheduled custody exchange at 8am. When I told him we'd miss our flight if he did this, he sent me GIFs of crying babies.

My attorney says I can't administer electroshock therapy without a signed consent form. What should I do?

1- Get a a signed consent form.

2- Have sex with him, get pregnant and don’t give him the fetus.

3- Donuts with mustard and tuna.

Go vegan. Consistently show up at his dinner parties uninvited. Eat all his potatoes. And discourage him from buying title insurance on any future home purchases.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a real situation, but it makes me so mad that I need to just laugh about the whole thing or I'll lose my sanity, so please give me all the bad advice...

I've been in a long, difficult custody battle and my xH finally agreed to let me take DC out of state for a vacation. However, at the last minute, after I already bought plane tickets for 9am, he lets me know that he won't be handing over DC to me until the regularly scheduled custody exchange at 8am. When I told him we'd miss our flight if he did this, he sent me GIFs of crying babies.

My attorney says I can't administer electroshock therapy without a signed consent form. What should I do?

The jeans posted a few pages back are a good start. Hook up with a Sugar Daddy tonight, pick up DC tomorrow at 8 am (and don't shower so X knows what you were up to...that'll show him!), then take SD's private plane to destination choice of SD. Have fun!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Which toilet seat should I buy for my commode?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My boyfriend and I have been dating for 12 years, 3 months, and 27 days. When is he going to pop the question? I'm tired of waiting!

Do you have the cats for the wedding?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m sick of cleaning bathrooms. I want to get rid of all of them in my Bethesda McMansion and just bring a porta potty indoors.

Where can I get a classy one?

Don John. Gold toilets. The BEST toilets. Beautiful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I try to keep my house clean, but my family and friends keeps bringing in germs, dirt and bugs from outdoors. How can I get them to stop contaminating my home?

NASA decontamination chamber before they enter the house. I bought several on EBay, but I suspect they will start selling them on Amazon because of Rocket in his Pocket Bezos. You could also try Etsy but it could be bordered in lace.

I am concerned that even if the germs are removed they will still have that "outside smell". Should I get a scented candle? I have heard they are very high class.

[Anonymous]

My cat is annoyed that I am using her discarded angora hairballs for my tea cozy shop on Etsy. I feel giving her 40% of proceeds is fair.

Now she won't "talk" to me and is clawing my scarlet curtains.

What should I do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My cat is annoyed that I am using her discarded angora hairballs for my tea cozy shop on Etsy. I feel giving her 40% of proceeds is fair.

Now she won't "talk" to me and is clawing my scarlet curtains.

What should I do?

Get a second cat

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are Capri pants flattering on me?

Capris look great. Especially if you have skinny legs and chunky shoes, or large legs with beige shoes that old people wear.

[Anonymous]

I am a man. Can I also wear Capri pants? Many men wear them in Europe. And what kind of shoes should I wear?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a man. Can I also wear Capri pants? Many men wear them in Europe. And what kind of shoes should I wear?

The mermaid pants are unisex. These are the right shoes:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How can I save money to buy a house in Arlington when I make $50K a year? I’m 28 and have 3 kittens.

Run a bake sale to cover a down payment.

[Anonymous]

My child is entering k in the fall. What’s the best way to notify the parents of dumber children in his class how smart he is?