Be honest- what do you think about women who are content to be just wives and mothers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They lack drive and tenacity to hold a career.

Ok but so what? Most people are not career driven. Most people work to make money so that they can enjoy life, and if it were possible for them to have a comfortable life without working, they would quit.

I live on a wealthy street and most of the women do not work, or work very part time. The only woman I can think of on my block who is employed full time (besides me) is a single mom because her husband passed away. I work full time despite not needing to for financial reasons, and I regularly question my own sanity. I was also always the overachiever type and I recognize that I’m an outlier.

Nobody said it was good or bad. You insinuated that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They lack drive and tenacity to hold a career.

This is probably a troll, but I'll bite. My husband makes 15 times what I made when I worked out of the house- and I was a 6 figure earner. Because of how we wish to arrange and prioritize our family life, I am currently at home. If I had been the high earned, he would have stayed at home. There's nothing more or less to behind this choice. Sometimes the decision is just math.

Maybe if you had more drive your H would make less.

I'm not sure what your point is. People with different skill sets and careers make different amounts of money. And as much as people like to smugly talk about getting to where they are through drive, a good deal of it is luck. Hard work maybe, but rarely without some luck.

[Anonymous]

I think SAHMs are great. As are moms who work outside the house. I’m delighted every time a woman is able to do what is best for her and her family. All boats rise in the tide and all.

[Anonymous]

I do kind of look down on them though l would never say that. I love working at a job that is very interesting and challenging. I would never choose to cook and clean and drive kids around over my job. I don’t mind cooking a few times a week and am happy to pay for cleaners and child care and private school and spend quality engaged time with my kids, over quantity.

[Anonymous]

The longer I raise kids, the more I realize that to do it right really is a full time job. Either I should do it myself, or have a nanny who devotes herself full-time to it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do kind of look down on them though l would never say that. I love working at a job that is very interesting and challenging. I would never choose to cook and clean and drive kids around over my job. I don’t mind cooking a few times a week and am happy to pay for cleaners and child care and private school and spend quality engaged time with my kids, over quantity.

And I would hate to miss the milestones, events and, yes, the day to day stuff you find so beneath you. I will never regret my choice to stay home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do kind of look down on them though l would never say that. I love working at a job that is very interesting and challenging. I would never choose to cook and clean and drive kids around over my job. I don’t mind cooking a few times a week and am happy to pay for cleaners and child care and private school and spend quality engaged time with my kids, over quantity.

I look down on you because you like your job more than your kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do kind of look down on them though l would never say that. I love working at a job that is very interesting and challenging. I would never choose to cook and clean and drive kids around over my job. I don’t mind cooking a few times a week and am happy to pay for cleaners and child care and private school and spend quality engaged time with my kids, over quantity.

I look down on you because you like your job more than your kids.

And here is the crux of the argument.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do kind of look down on them though l would never say that. I love working at a job that is very interesting and challenging. I would never choose to cook and clean and drive kids around over my job. I don’t mind cooking a few times a week and am happy to pay for cleaners and child care and private school and spend quality engaged time with my kids, over quantity.

I look down on you because you like your job more than your kids.

I like my kids just fine, but not all day every day. I like both my kids, and my job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do kind of look down on them though l would never say that. I love working at a job that is very interesting and challenging. I would never choose to cook and clean and drive kids around over my job. I don’t mind cooking a few times a week and am happy to pay for cleaners and child care and private school and spend quality engaged time with my kids, over quantity.

Goodness, what must you think of the people who clean your house and provide care for your children so you can work?

[Anonymous]

I only roll my eyes at the “let me ask my husband first” ones. Yes, parents who work outside of the home CAN be people who ask their spouse for permission to spend any money, but in my personal experience, I e only encountered that in SAHMs.

As for other SAHMs, I admire them. I need the structure and external expectations of a job. They’re better at a unique set of skills. More power to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do kind of look down on them though l would never say that. I love working at a job that is very interesting and challenging. I would never choose to cook and clean and drive kids around over my job. I don’t mind cooking a few times a week and am happy to pay for cleaners and child care and private school and spend quality engaged time with my kids, over quantity.

I look down on you because you like your job more than your kids.

And here is the crux of the argument.

DP but I think the response was specific to that particular poster who very clearly DOES like her job much more than her kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do kind of look down on them though l would never say that. I love working at a job that is very interesting and challenging. I would never choose to cook and clean and drive kids around over my job. I don’t mind cooking a few times a week and am happy to pay for cleaners and child care and private school and spend quality engaged time with my kids, over quantity.

I look down on you because you like your job more than your kids.

I like my kids just fine, but not all day every day. I like both my kids, and my job.

You describe your kids the way I might describe my cat.

[Anonymous]

I think this is something frequently debated amongst women in their 30s and 40s and thank God, completely dropped in their 50s. Not because kids are grown and it doesn’t matter, but because it becomes apparent that whether someone was a SAHM or not just doesn’t matter. Everyone made the best decisions they could for their families and hopefully ended up with purposeful, fulfilled lives and so did their kids. The meaningless comparisons just intended to prop up the one doing the comparing…they just fade away.

[Anonymous]

What do I think about women who are content to be just wives and mothers? I think I am jealous of them! Really. I work because my salary covers our kids' private school. I'll probably be working until they graduate college and then I will become a SAHDM (Stay at home Dog Mom).