Toxic Mothers-In-Law and bizarre things they do

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She "gifts" me her old costume jewelry; gave DH an open costco pack of toothpaste (2 out of the 6 were gone - the box was taped shut with masking tape).

Dang. I see NOTHING wrong with either of those.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When my husband's old girlfriend got divorced, she called DH to tell him that "katie" was back on the market again -- you know, in case he wanted to divorce me and our four children in order to pursue her, I guess.

This was my deceased mil! She would have 2 of his exes over to her house. One came into town and she actually let her stay there a week. It blew my mind then I decided after that my kids weren't going to be around her. Long story, but Karma comes back around. We were in the UP of MI vacationing one Xmas. Apparently she went into the hospital then it became very serious. No one could get a hold of DH because they didn't know who we were staying with. (we didn't want them to) Usually if we went out of state they wanted the phone number of the people we were staying with...I'm totally serious. Control freaks! She ended up dying, the rest of his sisters were mad because they had to do all the work while DH was away having fun. I remember my dad advising me to stick it out.he said.."time is on my side". He sure was right!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She "gifts" me her old costume jewelry; gave DH an open costco pack of toothpaste (2 out of the 6 were gone - the box was taped shut with masking tape).

Dang. I see NOTHING wrong with either of those.

I should mention these were Xmas and birthday gifts. Please don’t gift open boxes of toothpaste or your old crap that you no longer want!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She "gifts" me her old costume jewelry; gave DH an open costco pack of toothpaste (2 out of the 6 were gone - the box was taped shut with masking tape).

Dang. I see NOTHING wrong with either of those.

Sh!t’s pretty funny, but nowhere near toxic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL had a gigantic "grandma' shower with over 40 guests to which I (the mother of the child) was not invited.

You win!

Haha! DP here. I can kinda see inviting all your grandma/older lady buddies and having a big party amongst yourselves. With drinks!

[Anonymous]

OP,
I've often wondered if my MIL does the perfume thing. Our kids will sometimes strongly smell of her, and sometimes she does the laundry and i've noticed the clean clothes smell more like her perfume than clean laundry.

What else has she done: "surprised" us by painting our ceiling and re-finishing some floorboards, telling me that my father "probably" cheats on my mother, hit on my father, and oh so much more.....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When my husband's old girlfriend got divorced, she called DH to tell him that "katie" was back on the market again -- you know, in case he wanted to divorce me and our four children in order to pursue her, I guess.

This was my deceased mil! She would have 2 of his exes over to her house. One came into town and she actually let her stay there a week. It blew my mind then I decided after that my kids weren't going to be around her. Long story, but Karma comes back around. We were in the UP of MI vacationing one Xmas. Apparently she went into the hospital then it became very serious. No one could get a hold of DH because they didn't know who we were staying with. (we didn't want them to) Usually if we went out of state they wanted the phone number of the people we were staying with...I'm totally serious. Control freaks! She ended up dying, the rest of his sisters were mad because they had to do all the work while DH was away having fun. I remember my dad advising me to stick it out.he said.."time is on my side". He sure was right!

So your DH missed the opportunity to see his mother before she died. Yeah, that’s not karma for having an exgirlfriend stay with her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In traditional Australian aboriginal culture, mothers in law and daughters in law do not communicate/interact directly but is done through third party (usually son) Prevents lots of problems

As one of the oldest cultures on earth we can certainly learn something from this practice!

My MIL does this and it drives me NUTS. Will only talk to DH for things like holiday plans, asking to see DC, literally will not talk to me or respond to me. It's incredibly offensive and drives me crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When my husband's old girlfriend got divorced, she called DH to tell him that "katie" was back on the market again -- you know, in case he wanted to divorce me and our four children in order to pursue her, I guess.

This was my deceased mil! She would have 2 of his exes over to her house. One came into town and she actually let her stay there a week. It blew my mind then I decided after that my kids weren't going to be around her. Long story, but Karma comes back around. We were in the UP of MI vacationing one Xmas. Apparently she went into the hospital then it became very serious. No one could get a hold of DH because they didn't know who we were staying with. (we didn't want them to) Usually if we went out of state they wanted the phone number of the people we were staying with...I'm totally serious. Control freaks! She ended up dying, the rest of his sisters were mad because they had to do all the work while DH was away having fun. I remember my dad advising me to stick it out.he said.."time is on my side". He sure was right!

How do you not let the kids see her? My MIL lives close and DH takes DC over every chance he can get. I never go. It really irritates me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In traditional Australian aboriginal culture, mothers in law and daughters in law do not communicate/interact directly but is done through third party (usually son) Prevents lots of problems

As one of the oldest cultures on earth we can certainly learn something from this practice!

That would be utterly weird here and would be seen as a rejection. We can't just import culture here without repercussions!

[Anonymous]

What I wonder is how did these crazy women raise nice men that we married?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What I wonder is how did these crazy women raise nice men that we married?

My DH has almost a decade of therapy. He’s who he is despite that woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I wonder is how did these crazy women raise nice men that we married?

My DH has almost a decade of therapy. He’s who he is despite that woman.

Dear MIL, do not advise me on how to raise my children. I've seen your work.

[Anonymous]

When my then-boyfriend, now husband and I had been living together for several years and MIL knew I was waiting for him to propose, she came to stay with us for a week-long visit. She spent the entire time telling me about her friends who dated men for years only to be dumped and have the men marry their next girlfriend within "months". She also told my husband during the same visit that she wasn't in any hurry for grandchildren.

The stunned, disappointed silence on the phone when we called her the following year to tell her we were engaged was just the sweetest sound.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She "gifts" me her old costume jewelry; gave DH an open costco pack of toothpaste (2 out of the 6 were gone - the box was taped shut with masking tape).

Dang. I see NOTHING wrong with either of those.

Was the toothpaste for like a milestone birthday or Xmas present or something? I love it when my parents give me their Costco extras!