Considering an affair

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go read some of the stories on surviving infidelity or talk about marriage, and then see if you still want to be a cheater. Maybe consider getting individual counseling to figure out why you think potentially blowing up your family could be a good idea.

Seriously? Those stories do nothing for me. I always end up thinking how pathetic the cheated upon seem.

Is this the OP? You sound really uncomfortable with emotions. Have you ever been to therapy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go read some of the stories on surviving infidelity or talk about marriage, and then see if you still want to be a cheater. Maybe consider getting individual counseling to figure out why you think potentially blowing up your family could be a good idea.

Seriously? Those stories do nothing for me. I always end up thinking how pathetic the cheated upon seem.

Is this the OP? You sound really uncomfortable with emotions. Have you ever been to therapy?

I'm not OP, but I am uncomfortable with emotions. You got me there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go read some of the stories on surviving infidelity or talk about marriage, and then see if you still want to be a cheater. Maybe consider getting individual counseling to figure out why you think potentially blowing up your family could be a good idea.

Seriously? Those stories do nothing for me. I always end up thinking how pathetic the cheated upon seem.

Is this the OP? You sound really uncomfortable with emotions. Have you ever been to therapy?

I'm not OP, but I am uncomfortable with emotions. You got me there.

Let me add, I specifically went to those sites to read about the cheated upon ... to see if I'd empathize with them. And I do somewhat/sometimes. But mostly, no. Perhaps I am a sociopath as a PP noted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You must be low on empathy — for your spouse and their spouse (and kids).

In other words, she’s a woman.

Oh hey, incel bro! How’s the weather over in Moscow today?

LOL, stupidest possible response. More proof that women aren't funny and the Left can't meme.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a stupid way to scratch an itch. Find a better way.

OP here. A better way...how? Clearly I am not happy with what I am getting at home and conversations about our sex life has gotten us nowhere. On top of that, my husband travels and who knows what he is doing on these trips where he's staying out after midnight "entertaining clients". So maybe before anyone judges, its not always one sided. I am just trying to find a discreet way to fill a void in my marriage without blowing up my family. Unlike a lot of women on dcum, i need regular sex in my life and that is just not happening.

You’re looking for excuses to cheat and you want us to validate your decision. People who want to cheat, cheat. It doesn’t sound like you’re happy in your marriage or that you trust your husband (although that just sounds like you’re trying to justify your own desire to cheat). Look, OP you obviously want to cheat, but as others have said, be aware of the consequences. If caught, you will screw up your children’s lives, damage your marriage, jeopardize your job, and lose the respect of your friends and colleagues. If you’re willing to risk your life this way, then why not divorce?

I don't agree. She didn't ask what anyone thinks about her decision. One she has already made. And she didn't ask for judgement although that is mostly what she has received. She asked for specific advice about how to approach the target of her desires. I'm sure she realizes the risks involved. She needs sex and she is not getting it in her marriage. What advice would you give her husband or any husband who has driven his wife to look elsewhere?

[Anonymous]

Too bad you don’t live in Annapolis. I’d be more than happy to scratch that it for you. Good luck...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go read some of the stories on surviving infidelity or talk about marriage, and then see if you still want to be a cheater. Maybe consider getting individual counseling to figure out why you think potentially blowing up your family could be a good idea.

Seriously? Those stories do nothing for me. I always end up thinking how pathetic the cheated upon seem.

I mean... you’re probably a sociopath. Just go ahead and do it, if you lose at least some access to your children they are probably better off.

I was thinking the same. This OP is missing something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a stupid way to scratch an itch. Find a better way.

OP here. A better way...how? Clearly I am not happy with what I am getting at home and conversations about our sex life has gotten us nowhere. On top of that, my husband travels and who knows what he is doing on these trips where he's staying out after midnight "entertaining clients". So maybe before anyone judges, its not always one sided. I am just trying to find a discreet way to fill a void in my marriage without blowing up my family. Unlike a lot of women on dcum, i need regular sex in my life and that is just not happening.

You’re looking for excuses to cheat and you want us to validate your decision. People who want to cheat, cheat. It doesn’t sound like you’re happy in your marriage or that you trust your husband (although that just sounds like you’re trying to justify your own desire to cheat). Look, OP you obviously want to cheat, but as others have said, be aware of the consequences. If caught, you will screw up your children’s lives, damage your marriage, jeopardize your job, and lose the respect of your friends and colleagues. If you’re willing to risk your life this way, then why not divorce?

I don't agree. She didn't ask what anyone thinks about her decision. One she has already made. And she didn't ask for judgement although that is mostly what she has received. She asked for specific advice about how to approach the target of her desires. I'm sure she realizes the risks involved. She needs sex and she is not getting it in her marriage. What advice would you give her husband or any husband who has driven his wife to look elsewhere?

If this is just about her wanting sex, why is she targeting her married co-worker? Can’t she find a FWB? It sounds like she’s looking for something else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do I test the waters and let him know I am interested?

Tell him about your predicament regarding how you're not getting it at home and stressed...
See what his response is.

[Anonymous]

Why don't you just divorce instead of turning into a slut? Your marriage is obviously over if you are considering an affair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a stupid way to scratch an itch. Find a better way.

OP here. A better way...how? Clearly I am not happy with what I am getting at home and conversations about our sex life has gotten us nowhere. On top of that, my husband travels and who knows what he is doing on these trips where he's staying out after midnight "entertaining clients". So maybe before anyone judges, its not always one sided. I am just trying to find a discreet way to fill a void in my marriage without blowing up my family. Unlike a lot of women on dcum, i need regular sex in my life and that is just not happening.

You’re looking for excuses to cheat and you want us to validate your decision. People who want to cheat, cheat. It doesn’t sound like you’re happy in your marriage or that you trust your husband (although that just sounds like you’re trying to justify your own desire to cheat). Look, OP you obviously want to cheat, but as others have said, be aware of the consequences. If caught, you will screw up your children’s lives, damage your marriage, jeopardize your job, and lose the respect of your friends and colleagues. If you’re willing to risk your life this way, then why not divorce?

I don't agree. She didn't ask what anyone thinks about her decision. One she has already made. And she didn't ask for judgement although that is mostly what she has received. She asked for specific advice about how to approach the target of her desires. I'm sure she realizes the risks involved. She needs sex and she is not getting it in her marriage. What advice would you give her husband or any husband who has driven his wife to look elsewhere?

If this is just about her wanting sex, why is she targeting her married co-worker? Can’t she find a FWB? It sounds like she’s looking for something else.

I don't know because she didn't say but maybe she has some notion that he would be open to it?

[Anonymous]

People who think having an affair won't "blow up their family" are clueless. Kids aren't stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a stupid way to scratch an itch. Find a better way.

OP here. A better way...how? Clearly I am not happy with what I am getting at home and conversations about our sex life has gotten us nowhere. On top of that, my husband travels and who knows what he is doing on these trips where he's staying out after midnight "entertaining clients". So maybe before anyone judges, its not always one sided. I am just trying to find a discreet way to fill a void in my marriage without blowing up my family. Unlike a lot of women on dcum, i need regular sex in my life and that is just not happening.

It wouldn’t matter if your husband were DTD with a different woman (or man!) on every trip. Your integrity is what you have control over. If you don’t GAF about it, why is that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People who think having an affair won't "blow up their family" are clueless. Kids aren't stupid.

Did you have an affair that ended badly? Stop presuming what you've read on the internet or what happened to you will happen to everyone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t do it with someone at work. Bad idea for many reasons.

Scratch that itch elsewhere, OP.

OP here. FWIW it's not someone from work. It's someone I am doing business with currently, and we both work for ourselves.