Anyone try to cultivate a lifelong interest in a certain university and had it backfire?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm basically just thinking of the thread with the mom whose kid doesn't want to go to VT and wants to pay $50k extra per year to go to Boston college..... Yikes .. if I get into a conversation like that, I'll have failed as a parent.

...because?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm basically just thinking of the thread with the mom whose kid doesn't want to go to VT and wants to pay $50k extra per year to go to Boston college..... Yikes .. if I get into a conversation like that, I'll have failed as a parent.

...because?

Because my kid at that point wouldn't understand anything about money or life sucfess if they are trying to convince me that paying $200k extra is worth the difference between one good school and another.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know too many families who raise their kids to love, live, and breathe my alma mater, who are then devastated when they don't get in.

Mind sharing which school?

Georgetown

[Anonymous]

Oh yeah, that's tough. I went there for grad school. Very hard to get into as an undergraduate

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For example, trying to get your kid interested in your alma mater or your state's flagship?

As a Marylander and Maryland grad, I'd be happy if my kids went there (especially with a scholarship), but I wonder if they will be bored of the campus by the time they are college age if they spend too much time there (games, Maryland day etc).

Last thing I'd want is for them to skip the state school and overpay for some mediocre alternative. If they go to some super elite school instead, ok that's fine too.

False dichotomy and you don’t know what you are talking about.

Please do tell.

There are a lot of state and private schools that are not elite and which provide a high quality education that doesn’t entail “overpaying.” Moreover, there are students for whom UMD-CP is not a good fit for any number of reasons, e.g. they would do better in a smaller environment, want a different set of programs, want a rural campus, whatever.

Beyond that, I want my kids to experience something other than Maryland, because to me, part of the point of college is experiencing something different. I don’t want my kids to be “lifelong Marylanders” by default because they had no options other than to attend the state flagship located just down the street.

Can you name those schools for families that do not qualify for FA?

There are a lot of threads on this board on that very topic, i.e. re: schools that award merit scholarships. They include e.g. U South Carolina, U Rochester, Oberlin, the Ohio SLACs (Denison, Wooster, Ohio Wesleyan, Oberlin), Johns Hopkins, Washington University in St. Louis, Case Western Reserve, U. Pittsburgh. The list goes on and includes e.g. Swarthmore and U Chicago (which award very few scholarships, but they do award them).

My kid has high stats and will get into UMD for sure, but is already in at Pitt with merit aid that brings the amount to just a thousand or so more than what UMD would cost for us, in-state. Who can blame him? College Park is a pit and Pitt is a great school in Pittsburgh, which is a fabulous city.

There's a big world out there, with lots of options.

[Anonymous]

^^^ i.e., DC is indifferent to whether UMD admits them because they prefer Pitt. I would, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think there are ways to experience more than Maryland other than going to another college. In particular, I think paying tens of thousands extra to experience some other town in the US is extremely stupid, when that same money could be spent on exploring dozens of countries and learning a handful of other languages (like I did). But those are just my personal priorities..

If you have only ever lived in Maryland, you have not truly experienced life elsewhere, no matter how much you have traveled.

People place emphasis on the most bizarre things. Now, if you’re talking UMDCP vs a small liberal arts college or something then sure, there is a difference. But people who pay $100K just so their kid can go to Big State U in Madison or Ann Arbor or wherever instead of Big State U in College Park under the rationale of “experiencing life elsewhere!!!!!” are absolute suckers.

[Anonymous]

^ +1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For example, trying to get your kid interested in your alma mater or your state's flagship?

As a Marylander and Maryland grad, I'd be happy if my kids went there (especially with a scholarship), but I wonder if they will be bored of the campus by the time they are college age if they spend too much time there (games, Maryland day etc).

Last thing I'd want is for them to skip the state school and overpay for some mediocre alternative. If they go to some super elite school instead, ok that's fine too.

False dichotomy and you don’t know what you are talking about.

Please do tell.

There are a lot of state and private schools that are not elite and which provide a high quality education that doesn’t entail “overpaying.” Moreover, there are students for whom UMD-CP is not a good fit for any number of reasons, e.g. they would do better in a smaller environment, want a different set of programs, want a rural campus, whatever.

Beyond that, I want my kids to experience something other than Maryland, because to me, part of the point of college is experiencing something different. I don’t want my kids to be “lifelong Marylanders” by default because they had no options other than to attend the state flagship located just down the street.

Can you name those schools for families that do not qualify for FA?

There are a lot of threads on this board on that very topic, i.e. re: schools that award merit scholarships. They include e.g. U South Carolina, U Rochester, Oberlin, the Ohio SLACs (Denison, Wooster, Ohio Wesleyan, Oberlin), Johns Hopkins, Washington University in St. Louis, Case Western Reserve, U. Pittsburgh. The list goes on and includes e.g. Swarthmore and U Chicago (which award very few scholarships, but they do award them).

My kid has high stats and will get into UMD for sure, but is already in at Pitt with merit aid that brings the amount to just a thousand or so more than what UMD would cost for us, in-state. Who can blame him? College Park is a pit and Pitt is a great school in Pittsburgh, which is a fabulous city.

There's a big world out there, with lots of options.

Pitt is MUCH easier to get in than CP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For example, trying to get your kid interested in your alma mater or your state's flagship?

As a Marylander and Maryland grad, I'd be happy if my kids went there (especially with a scholarship), but I wonder if they will be bored of the campus by the time they are college age if they spend too much time there (games, Maryland day etc).

Last thing I'd want is for them to skip the state school and overpay for some mediocre alternative. If they go to some super elite school instead, ok that's fine too.

False dichotomy and you don’t know what you are talking about.

Please do tell.

There are a lot of state and private schools that are not elite and which provide a high quality education that doesn’t entail “overpaying.” Moreover, there are students for whom UMD-CP is not a good fit for any number of reasons, e.g. they would do better in a smaller environment, want a different set of programs, want a rural campus, whatever.

Beyond that, I want my kids to experience something other than Maryland, because to me, part of the point of college is experiencing something different. I don’t want my kids to be “lifelong Marylanders” by default because they had no options other than to attend the state flagship located just down the street.

Can you name those schools for families that do not qualify for FA?

There are a lot of threads on this board on that very topic, i.e. re: schools that award merit scholarships. They include e.g. U South Carolina, U Rochester, Oberlin, the Ohio SLACs (Denison, Wooster, Ohio Wesleyan, Oberlin), Johns Hopkins, Washington University in St. Louis, Case Western Reserve, U. Pittsburgh. The list goes on and includes e.g. Swarthmore and U Chicago (which award very few scholarships, but they do award them).

My kid has high stats and will get into UMD for sure, but is already in at Pitt with merit aid that brings the amount to just a thousand or so more than what UMD would cost for us, in-state. Who can blame him? College Park is a pit and Pitt is a great school in Pittsburgh, which is a fabulous city.

There's a big world out there, with lots of options.

Pitt is MUCH easier to get in than CP.

They are not that different. Maryland is number 63 in the national universities rankings, and Pitt is number 70. The common data set for each of them is not very different.

If it were me, I would choose Pitt over Maryland hands-down. Pittsburgh is a much, much nicer place to live than College Park is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think there are ways to experience more than Maryland other than going to another college. In particular, I think paying tens of thousands extra to experience some other town in the US is extremely stupid, when that same money could be spent on exploring dozens of countries and learning a handful of other languages (like I did). But those are just my personal priorities..

If you have only ever lived in Maryland, you have not truly experienced life elsewhere, no matter how much you have traveled.

People place emphasis on the most bizarre things. Now, if you’re talking UMDCP vs a small liberal arts college or something then sure, there is a difference. But people who pay $100K just so their kid can go to Big State U in Madison or Ann Arbor or wherever instead of Big State U in College Park under the rationale of “experiencing life elsewhere!!!!!” are absolute suckers.

So you are saying that the culture and student body and experience in Madison, Wisconsin, or in Ann Arbor is the same as it is in College Park?

Uh huh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think there are ways to experience more than Maryland other than going to another college. In particular, I think paying tens of thousands extra to experience some other town in the US is extremely stupid, when that same money could be spent on exploring dozens of countries and learning a handful of other languages (like I did). But those are just my personal priorities..

If you have only ever lived in Maryland, you have not truly experienced life elsewhere, no matter how much you have traveled.

People place emphasis on the most bizarre things. Now, if you’re talking UMDCP vs a small liberal arts college or something then sure, there is a difference. But people who pay $100K just so their kid can go to Big State U in Madison or Ann Arbor or wherever instead of Big State U in College Park under the rationale of “experiencing life elsewhere!!!!!” are absolute suckers.

So you are saying that the culture and student body and experience in Madison, Wisconsin, or in Ann Arbor is the same as it is in College Park?

Uh huh.

Yes.

[Anonymous]

I mean, I can see cultivating such an interest in, say, UVA or UNC, or the like. But if you’re in Maryland, it is what it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For example, trying to get your kid interested in your alma mater or your state's flagship?

As a Marylander and Maryland grad, I'd be happy if my kids went there (especially with a scholarship), but I wonder if they will be bored of the campus by the time they are college age if they spend too much time there (games, Maryland day etc).

Last thing I'd want is for them to skip the state school and overpay for some mediocre alternative. If they go to some super elite school instead, ok that's fine too.

The main back fires I have seen is when the child does not get into the parent's alma mater.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For example, trying to get your kid interested in your alma mater or your state's flagship?

As a Marylander and Maryland grad, I'd be happy if my kids went there (especially with a scholarship), but I wonder if they will be bored of the campus by the time they are college age if they spend too much time there (games, Maryland day etc).

Last thing I'd want is for them to skip the state school and overpay for some mediocre alternative. If they go to some super elite school instead, ok that's fine too.

False dichotomy and you don’t know what you are talking about.

Please do tell.

There are a lot of state and private schools that are not elite and which provide a high quality education that doesn’t entail “overpaying.” Moreover, there are students for whom UMD-CP is not a good fit for any number of reasons, e.g. they would do better in a smaller environment, want a different set of programs, want a rural campus, whatever.

Beyond that, I want my kids to experience something other than Maryland, because to me, part of the point of college is experiencing something different. I don’t want my kids to be “lifelong Marylanders” by default because they had no options other than to attend the state flagship located just down the street.

Totally agree. I went to undergrad basically in my hometown, and didn’t get the hell out of VA until my Ph.D. in another state. I’m hoping my kid goes “away” to school, since I feel college is ideally a time to spread one’s wings. Sure, if there’s a program in-state that’s a really great fit, so be it, but all things being equal I’d prefer if my kids experience a different part of the country (or world—many students at my kid’s school go abroad for college).