snooping

[Anonymous]

I don't snoop, but I also don't hide anything. If he wants to use my phone I'm not going to freak out and same on his side. I believe some things should be kept private -as in he doesn't need to know every thought or conversation I have with friends. Even though we are a couple we are still individuals and should be respected as such.

[Anonymous]

Never snooped had open access. Then exDW started acting weird and locked phone. Found out she was having an affair from emails.
From now on - trust but verify!

[Anonymous]

It's vicious cycle.

Once you snoop, you have to follow up snoop to see if anything has happened since you last snooped; confront the person on what you find; then they know you're snooping and work harder to hide things; they don't trust you to not snoop and you don't trust them to not be hiding something which you should be snooping about.

It's best to not get into this.

- Signed, a Recovering Snooper.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do, and I totally trust my DH, so I think I'm just nosy. It's made me really hate one of his friends in particular.

Probably because you found out one of his friends isn't a good person. I pay the phone bills, so I see calls etc. I wouldn't be with anyone who was like that.

My phone died before so we shared for awhile, how it should be. I suspect some cheaters on here who got caught or are hiding something.

Ding ding ding! Believe me, I have a high threshold for dude behavior, and this guy's just a pig. I didn't even have to read the phone to know so, but the phone continually confirmed it.

Snooping through my husband's phone made me think less of all of his friends. Also my husband. All they do it make fun of people, typically those less fortunate, and discuss women and sex. It's lame and seems so superficial. It has been pathetic to read my husband's messages. He tries really hard to be cool and it's the same old same old all the time.

Interesting.... I have the same problem with my 16 year old and have had to explain not to do this on text/social media/etc. He also can't write LOL to shit that isn't LOL.

This is why you all shouldn't snoop! What good comes of it? Who needs to read how your husband talks to his friends? What a terrible invasion of privacy. If I was him, I'd be pissed!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do, and I totally trust my DH, so I think I'm just nosy. It's made me really hate one of his friends in particular.

Probably because you found out one of his friends isn't a good person. I pay the phone bills, so I see calls etc. I wouldn't be with anyone who was like that.

My phone died before so we shared for awhile, how it should be. I suspect some cheaters on here who got caught or are hiding something.

Ding ding ding! Believe me, I have a high threshold for dude behavior, and this guy's just a pig. I didn't even have to read the phone to know so, but the phone continually confirmed it.

Snooping through my husband's phone made me think less of all of his friends. Also my husband. All they do it make fun of people, typically those less fortunate, and discuss women and sex. It's lame and seems so superficial. It has been pathetic to read my husband's messages. He tries really hard to be cool and it's the same old same old all the time.

Interesting.... I have the same problem with my 16 year old and have had to explain not to do this on text/social media/etc. He also can't write LOL to shit that isn't LOL.

This is why you all shouldn't snoop! What good comes of it? Who needs to read how your husband talks to his friends? What a terrible invasion of privacy. If I was him, I'd be pissed!

What good? We had an open and amazing conversation about racist comments, calling girls ho's, making sexual references about somebody's mom, starting rumors about girls/boys/families...

We discussed how if feels fun and innocent, but it is not, it is not moral. Now that his friends moms have read the group chats they have forbidden certain kids from their house, and they should.


He should always be careful about what he puts in writing because it can always come back to bite you in the ass, even if it doesn't it just is not nice. Good an honerable people do not try to cricitize, hurt and talk bad about others to make themselves feel better.

Oh yea, I also figured out which kids drink/drink and drive, smoke pot, smoke pot and drive. I know which parents serve alcohol to minors. I could go on forever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's vicious cycle.

Once you snoop, you have to follow up snoop to see if anything has happened since you last snooped; confront the person on what you find; then they know you're snooping and work harder to hide things; they don't trust you to not snoop and you don't trust them to not be hiding something which you should be snooping about.

It's best to not get into this.

- Signed, a Recovering Snooper.

[Anonymous]

Here is a good explanation about why "snooping" is good for a marriage and blind trust is bad.

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8121_snoop.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do, and I totally trust my DH, so I think I'm just nosy. It's made me really hate one of his friends in particular.

Probably because you found out one of his friends isn't a good person. I pay the phone bills, so I see calls etc. I wouldn't be with anyone who was like that.

My phone died before so we shared for awhile, how it should be. I suspect some cheaters on here who got caught or are hiding something.

Ding ding ding! Believe me, I have a high threshold for dude behavior, and this guy's just a pig. I didn't even have to read the phone to know so, but the phone continually confirmed it.

Snooping through my husband's phone made me think less of all of his friends. Also my husband. All they do it make fun of people, typically those less fortunate, and discuss women and sex. It's lame and seems so superficial. It has been pathetic to read my husband's messages. He tries really hard to be cool and it's the same old same old all the time.

Interesting.... I have the same problem with my 16 year old and have had to explain not to do this on text/social media/etc. He also can't write LOL to shit that isn't LOL.

This is why you all shouldn't snoop! What good comes of it? Who needs to read how your husband talks to his friends? What a terrible invasion of privacy. If I was him, I'd be pissed!

What good? We had an open and amazing conversation about racist comments, calling girls ho's, making sexual references about somebody's mom, starting rumors about girls/boys/families...

We discussed how if feels fun and innocent, but it is not, it is not moral. Now that his friends moms have read the group chats they have forbidden certain kids from their house, and they should.


He should always be careful about what he puts in writing because it can always come back to bite you in the ass, even if it doesn't it just is not nice. Good an honerable people do not try to cricitize, hurt and talk bad about others to make themselves feel better.

Oh yea, I also figured out which kids drink/drink and drive, smoke pot, smoke pot and drive. I know which parents serve alcohol to minors. I could go on forever.

We're shifting to children now?
I thought the subject was snooping on spouses and significant others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here is a good explanation about why "snooping" is good for a marriage and blind trust is bad.

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8121_snoop.html

Good point, blind trust is the worst. I've seen some people really burned by this either by cheating or financial. You should treat your marriage like you do your accounts, carefully review from time to time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here is a good explanation about why "snooping" is good for a marriage and blind trust is bad.

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8121_snoop.html

To each their own, but if my spouse said I wasn't entitled to privacy because I was now married, I would end my marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here is a good explanation about why "snooping" is good for a marriage and blind trust is bad.

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8121_snoop.html

To each their own, but if my spouse said I wasn't entitled to privacy because I was now married, I would end my marriage.

What are you keeping "private"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here is a good explanation about why "snooping" is good for a marriage and blind trust is bad.

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8121_snoop.html

To each their own, but if my spouse said I wasn't entitled to privacy because I was now married, I would end my marriage.

What are you keeping "private"?

Perhaps I am communicating with a friend about something embarrassing and confidential. The content, substance and mere existence of which is none of your business. Your snooping is a monumental violation. Monumental.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here is a good explanation about why "snooping" is good for a marriage and blind trust is bad.

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8121_snoop.html

To each their own, but if my spouse said I wasn't entitled to privacy because I was now married, I would end my marriage.

What are you keeping "private"?

Perhaps I am communicating with a friend about something embarrassing and confidential. The content, substance and mere existence of which is none of your business. Your snooping is a monumental violation. Monumental.

My friends and I have a rule, if I tell you something I assume you will tell your spouse. Maybe if you did tell your spouse everything it would stop you from doing embarrassing things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here is a good explanation about why "snooping" is good for a marriage and blind trust is bad.

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8121_snoop.html

To each their own, but if my spouse said I wasn't entitled to privacy because I was now married, I would end my marriage.

What are you keeping "private"?

Or communications with a therapist. Maybe I am worried about you. Maybe I think you need help and I am talking to your mom and sister.

Or maybe it's work related. I'm a lawyer and I sometimes get texts and emails. That's none of your business and your snooping could have serious consequences to others.

You are controlling and insecure. If you couldn't pick a partner you could trust, that's your problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here is a good explanation about why "snooping" is good for a marriage and blind trust is bad.

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8121_snoop.html

What are the credentials of this "marriage builders" website? For all I know they write articles for Cosmo. Just because you post a link does not make it so.