Parents of boys who became incels

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys need
A mom at home.
Almost zero screen time.
Male and female friends, in real life.
A good education, either at home or in a private school.
Lots of fresh air every day.

If you're not doing that, you're gonna have a bad time. Bottom line.

I found the right wing incel. Be for real. Mom at home isn't happening in this economy. Public schools have better educated teachers than private schools that require minimal education and training.

I want responses from real people who live in the real world.

I know. Public schools have been doing a great job.

Sarcasm aside, your Mom at home is impossible remark is a myth. My family does it on low six-figures, but I know families that do it with Dad earning anywhere between 75k and 600k. Just scale your lifestyle, prioritize the important things first.

Public schools *have* been doing a great job. You seem to be suggesting otherwise as if it’s patently obvious. If that is your intent, I dispute your premise and dismiss you as being not a serious person, ergo your opinion isn’t valid.

[Anonymous]

What about straight up warning your kid? When we were young we were wanted about predators and scams in the internet. Why not approach incels the same way. They want to isolate and radicalized young boys and boys should be warned that those attitudes will make them undateable and friendless. The people behind the screens are not their friends and they aren't looking out for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys need
A mom at home.
Almost zero screen time.
Male and female friends, in real life.
A good education, either at home or in a private school.
Lots of fresh air every day.

If you're not doing that, you're gonna have a bad time. Bottom line.

I found the right wing incel. Be for real. Mom at home isn't happening in this economy. Public schools have better educated teachers than private schools that require minimal education and training.

I want responses from real people who live in the real world.

I know. Public schools have been doing a great job.

Sarcasm aside, your Mom at home is impossible remark is a myth. My family does it on low six-figures, but I know families that do it with Dad earning anywhere between 75k and 600k. Just scale your lifestyle, prioritize the important things first.

Public schools *have* been doing a great job. You seem to be suggesting otherwise as if it’s patently obvious. If that is your intent, I dispute your premise and dismiss you as being not a serious person, ergo your opinion isn’t valid.

Dp but the irony of someone who apparently can’t read any sort of statistic making the completely verifiably false statement that public schools “do a great job.” They certainly did you dirty, pp - good luck out there.

[Anonymous]

No one on this thread knows what "incel" means?
It's a guy who can't get laid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys need
A mom at home.
Almost zero screen time.
Male and female friends, in real life.
A good education, either at home or in a private school.
Lots of fresh air every day.

If you're not doing that, you're gonna have a bad time. Bottom line.

I found the right wing incel. Be for real. Mom at home isn't happening in this economy. Public schools have better educated teachers than private schools that require minimal education and training.

I want responses from real people who live in the real world.

I know. Public schools have been doing a great job.

Sarcasm aside, your Mom at home is impossible remark is a myth. My family does it on low six-figures, but I know families that do it with Dad earning anywhere between 75k and 600k. Just scale your lifestyle, prioritize the important things first.

Public schools *have* been doing a great job. You seem to be suggesting otherwise as if it’s patently obvious. If that is your intent, I dispute your premise and dismiss you as being not a serious person, ergo your opinion isn’t valid.

Dp but the irony of someone who apparently can’t read any sort of statistic making the completely verifiably false statement that public schools “do a great job.” They certainly did you dirty, pp - good luck out there.

NP. My kids’ public schools do a great job considering what they have to work with. Parents—of all socioeconomic levels—have completely abdicated their responsibilities to raise good people. Kids with a solid foundation at home can get a great education at most public schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a problem that the entire discussion in this thread is premised on an assumption that boys are almost inherently at risk of going off the rails and becoming bad. That assumption, which unfortunately has becoming deeply rooted in culture and especially in schools due to liberal political preferences, is the key driver for the problem you are worried about. Right now, girls are boosted and treated like the future at every turn, even in implausible situations. Look at the Super Bowl ads for one example, where, among other things, there was an ad where a minority female implausibly bested the entire men's football team (who were portrayed as hateful ogres throughout). Until you all learn to respect and value boys, expect bad results. Toxic femininity is real and a problem.

Spoken like a true incel. Blaming it all on women with NO accountability for men and boys. I can't take you seriously.

What can parents do to help boys in this new world where women and minorities are rightfully represented. The answer isn't to diminish women or minorities. I want to learn how to help my son coexist and thrive in this new world. I want to avoid prevent him from becoming an incel and recluse.

I appreciate some of the suggestions here regarding chores, etc. Keep those coming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys need
A mom at home.
Almost zero screen time.
Male and female friends, in real life.
A good education, either at home or in a private school.
Lots of fresh air every day.

If you're not doing that, you're gonna have a bad time. Bottom line.

I found the right wing incel. Be for real. Mom at home isn't happening in this economy. Public schools have better educated teachers than private schools that require minimal education and training.

I want responses from real people who live in the real world.

I know. Public schools have been doing a great job.

Sarcasm aside, your Mom at home is impossible remark is a myth. My family does it on low six-figures, but I know families that do it with Dad earning anywhere between 75k and 600k. Just scale your lifestyle, prioritize the important things first.

Public schools *have* been doing a great job. You seem to be suggesting otherwise as if it’s patently obvious. If that is your intent, I dispute your premise and dismiss you as being not a serious person, ergo your opinion isn’t valid.

Dp but the irony of someone who apparently can’t read any sort of statistic making the completely verifiably false statement that public schools “do a great job.” They certainly did you dirty, pp - good luck out there.

Whatever are you prattling about, simpleton? I have a terminal degree and earn $600k. I sure did get got done dirty. Or whatever.

Take a seat. Grownups are speaking. You may talk again when spoken to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No one on this thread knows what "incel" means?
It's a guy who can't get laid.

Yes, but it also means a guy who is angry at women for not being able to get laid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a problem that the entire discussion in this thread is premised on an assumption that boys are almost inherently at risk of going off the rails and becoming bad. That assumption, which unfortunately has becoming deeply rooted in culture and especially in schools due to liberal political preferences, is the key driver for the problem you are worried about. Right now, girls are boosted and treated like the future at every turn, even in implausible situations. Look at the Super Bowl ads for one example, where, among other things, there was an ad where a minority female implausibly bested the entire men's football team (who were portrayed as hateful ogres throughout). Until you all learn to respect and value boys, expect bad results. Toxic femininity is real and a problem.

Have you ever met a kid? Boys are (usually) confident to the point they need to learn humility, compassion and empathy. They need to be taught a lot emotional skills in order to not end up undateable in todays modern world where women will chose to stay single rather than marry them. That’s why we’re ending up with these incels.

Girls, on the other hand, (usually) develop the emotional skills early, independently and successfully. Where they need guidance is building skills like dealing with conflict and risk taking. Skills boys seems to develop more naturally.

That’s not toxic femininity. That’s basic child development.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about straight up warning your kid? When we were young we were wanted about predators and scams in the internet. Why not approach incels the same way. They want to isolate and radicalized young boys and boys should be warned that those attitudes will make them undateable and friendless. The people behind the screens are not their friends and they aren't looking out for them.

This is my approach. My kid likes to watch video game play through videos, so I straight up said "Some people who play a lot of video games have a hard time socializing outside the internet, and it makes them angry. Sometimes that anger is directed at women. So if you see an ad, or the algorithm tries to lead you to a video that you would not want me or your sisters to hear you watching, you need to turn it off."

I have also turned off the function that links YouTube videos to one another.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Boys need
A mom at home.
Almost zero screen time.
Male and female friends, in real life.
A good education, either at home or in a private school.
Lots of fresh air every day.

If you're not doing that, you're gonna have a bad time. Bottom line.

So, privilege?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a problem that the entire discussion in this thread is premised on an assumption that boys are almost inherently at risk of going off the rails and becoming bad. That assumption, which unfortunately has becoming deeply rooted in culture and especially in schools due to liberal political preferences, is the key driver for the problem you are worried about. Right now, girls are boosted and treated like the future at every turn, even in implausible situations. Look at the Super Bowl ads for one example, where, among other things, there was an ad where a minority female implausibly bested the entire men's football team (who were portrayed as hateful ogres throughout). Until you all learn to respect and value boys, expect bad results. Toxic femininity is real and a problem.

Spoken like a true incel. Blaming it all on women with NO accountability for men and boys. I can't take you seriously.

What can parents do to help boys in this new world where women and minorities are rightfully represented. The answer isn't to diminish women or minorities. I want to learn how to help my son coexist and thrive in this new world. I want to avoid prevent him from becoming an incel and recluse.

I appreciate some of the suggestions here regarding chores, etc. Keep those coming.

You are toxic. You treat boys like criminals in waiting while doing everything you can to tell girls they are awesome and can do anything (especially since the world goes out of its way to support them). Then you blame boys for being put off. The problem is you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a problem that the entire discussion in this thread is premised on an assumption that boys are almost inherently at risk of going off the rails and becoming bad. That assumption, which unfortunately has becoming deeply rooted in culture and especially in schools due to liberal political preferences, is the key driver for the problem you are worried about. Right now, girls are boosted and treated like the future at every turn, even in implausible situations. Look at the Super Bowl ads for one example, where, among other things, there was an ad where a minority female implausibly bested the entire men's football team (who were portrayed as hateful ogres throughout). Until you all learn to respect and value boys, expect bad results. Toxic femininity is real and a problem.

Have you ever met a kid? Boys are (usually) confident to the point they need to learn humility, compassion and empathy. They need to be taught a lot emotional skills in order to not end up undateable in todays modern world where women will chose to stay single rather than marry them. That’s why we’re ending up with these incels.

Girls, on the other hand, (usually) develop the emotional skills early, independently and successfully. Where they need guidance is building skills like dealing with conflict and risk taking. Skills boys seems to develop more naturally.

That’s not toxic femininity. That’s basic child development.

You are making my point for me. Do you listen to yourself?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a problem that the entire discussion in this thread is premised on an assumption that boys are almost inherently at risk of going off the rails and becoming bad. That assumption, which unfortunately has becoming deeply rooted in culture and especially in schools due to liberal political preferences, is the key driver for the problem you are worried about. Right now, girls are boosted and treated like the future at every turn, even in implausible situations. Look at the Super Bowl ads for one example, where, among other things, there was an ad where a minority female implausibly bested the entire men's football team (who were portrayed as hateful ogres throughout). Until you all learn to respect and value boys, expect bad results. Toxic femininity is real and a problem.

Spoken like a true incel. Blaming it all on women with NO accountability for men and boys. I can't take you seriously.

What can parents do to help boys in this new world where women and minorities are rightfully represented. The answer isn't to diminish women or minorities. I want to learn how to help my son coexist and thrive in this new world. I want to avoid prevent him from becoming an incel and recluse.

I appreciate some of the suggestions here regarding chores, etc. Keep those coming.

You are toxic. You treat boys like criminals in waiting while doing everything you can to tell girls they are awesome and can do anything (especially since the world goes out of its way to support them). Then you blame boys for being put off. The problem is you.

No is telling boys they can't do anything. I'm certainly not telling my DS or his friends that. They absolutely can but they have to work for it, compete for it, and it's not going to be handed to them. What I'm not going to do is tell my kid that if he fails then it's everyone else's fault. Because it isn't. Failure is a part of life and learning to overcome it is also a part of life. The problem is people like you out there in social media pushing the victim narrative that is debilitating to young boys.

I just want to hear from parents who have worked through this with their sons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a problem that the entire discussion in this thread is premised on an assumption that boys are almost inherently at risk of going off the rails and becoming bad. That assumption, which unfortunately has becoming deeply rooted in culture and especially in schools due to liberal political preferences, is the key driver for the problem you are worried about. Right now, girls are boosted and treated like the future at every turn, even in implausible situations. Look at the Super Bowl ads for one example, where, among other things, there was an ad where a minority female implausibly bested the entire men's football team (who were portrayed as hateful ogres throughout). Until you all learn to respect and value boys, expect bad results. Toxic femininity is real and a problem.

Spoken like a true incel. Blaming it all on women with NO accountability for men and boys. I can't take you seriously.

What can parents do to help boys in this new world where women and minorities are rightfully represented. The answer isn't to diminish women or minorities. I want to learn how to help my son coexist and thrive in this new world. I want to avoid prevent him from becoming an incel and recluse.

I appreciate some of the suggestions here regarding chores, etc. Keep those coming.

You are toxic. You treat boys like criminals in waiting while doing everything you can to tell girls they are awesome and can do anything (especially since the world goes out of its way to support them). Then you blame boys for being put off. The problem is you.

PP was right. You do speak like a true incel. The moment you have to relinquish some power to women you feel threatened. For millennia women and girls have been treated like less than but that was all ok, right? Hell, we had to fight for a right to vote while you think that was just inherently yours. So forgive us while the pendulum swings our way for a change.