Parents of boys who became incels

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have two stepsons in college who spend all day in their rooms on screens, have never had jobs, have had zero to one extra curric, no chores, have never dated, struggle to pass their classes despite being smart because they are playing video games rather than doing assignments, etc. I don't think they are right wing. But they are failure to launch (Are living at home in college because they like it better than the dorms).

Their mom is MIA. I've known them since junior high but their dad did not give me say in their upbringing. Their dad let them be on screens as much as they wanted. He did not make them get jobs, did not give them any chores, did not make sure they got outside for fresh air and exercise every day.

They literally spent all day, every day this summer in their rooms on screens. Letting dishes pile up in sink. No jobs. No chores. Did not see friends in person, only online.

If I were their parent, I would have changed the wifi password and taken away their devices until they got jobs.

So my advice is:
-Limit screen time
-Require at least one sport or activity per season
-Send them to summer camp that does not have screens
-Make them do their homework and turn assignments in on time. Have consewuences if they don't (ie dont allow video game playing six hours a day after school - well, dont allow that at all - but particularly not if they don't turn in their homework etc)
-Make them get summer jobs once they hit sixteen or seventeen.
-Give them chores from a young age.

My just out of college daughter says sadly that they are "losers" and that she would not recommend any girl date them. She had friends she saw in person, summer jobs, activities, turned in her homework etc. I didn't just let her sit around on screens all the time.

I think the "crisis" with boys is that many parents have very low expectations of tehir sons' contrubtiuons to their households and classrooms and society and enjoy using screens as babysitters.

So you married their dad, who is apparently also a huge loser. What does that say about YOU.

THIS!

I have never, ever seen a post where I am like....they are all awful?

[Anonymous]

I know several middle age adult incel/failure to launch men. The parents supported them way too long, gave too many chances. I can tell you that these adult incels will take advantage of women and other people - it's a one way street. They are takers. They have phony personas to cover their spotty employment and lack of accomplishments and adulting. That being said, I also think they may suffer from ongoing depression and alcohol addiction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have two stepsons in college who spend all day in their rooms on screens, have never had jobs, have had zero to one extra curric, no chores, have never dated, struggle to pass their classes despite being smart because they are playing video games rather than doing assignments, etc. I don't think they are right wing. But they are failure to launch (Are living at home in college because they like it better than the dorms).

Their mom is MIA. I've known them since junior high but their dad did not give me say in their upbringing. Their dad let them be on screens as much as they wanted. He did not make them get jobs, did not give them any chores, did not make sure they got outside for fresh air and exercise every day.

They literally spent all day, every day this summer in their rooms on screens. Letting dishes pile up in sink. No jobs. No chores. Did not see friends in person, only online.

If I were their parent, I would have changed the wifi password and taken away their devices until they got jobs.

So my advice is:
-Limit screen time
-Require at least one sport or activity per season
-Send them to summer camp that does not have screens
-Make them do their homework and turn assignments in on time. Have consewuences if they don't (ie dont allow video game playing six hours a day after school - well, dont allow that at all - but particularly not if they don't turn in their homework etc)
-Make them get summer jobs once they hit sixteen or seventeen.
-Give them chores from a young age.

My just out of college daughter says sadly that they are "losers" and that she would not recommend any girl date them. She had friends she saw in person, summer jobs, activities, turned in her homework etc. I didn't just let her sit around on screens all the time.

I think the "crisis" with boys is that many parents have very low expectations of tehir sons' contrubtiuons to their households and classrooms and society and enjoy using screens as babysitters.

This is terrible! Are you sure they are not violent? They could be, or possibly become violent

Are the video games used the ultra violent types? I bet at least some of them are

These posts are so much bull shite trolling. No fresh air every day! OMG alert the police. The non stop anxiety some of you have about your sons is so embarrassingly stupid. Did either of you actually attend college?

The lengths to which you go to minimize the growing incel threat lead to only one conclusion here:

- you are an incel. Or a MAGA. Possibly both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have two stepsons in college who spend all day in their rooms on screens, have never had jobs, have had zero to one extra curric, no chores, have never dated, struggle to pass their classes despite being smart because they are playing video games rather than doing assignments, etc. I don't think they are right wing. But they are failure to launch (Are living at home in college because they like it better than the dorms).

Their mom is MIA. I've known them since junior high but their dad did not give me say in their upbringing. Their dad let them be on screens as much as they wanted. He did not make them get jobs, did not give them any chores, did not make sure they got outside for fresh air and exercise every day.

They literally spent all day, every day this summer in their rooms on screens. Letting dishes pile up in sink. No jobs. No chores. Did not see friends in person, only online.

If I were their parent, I would have changed the wifi password and taken away their devices until they got jobs.

So my advice is:
-Limit screen time
-Require at least one sport or activity per season
-Send them to summer camp that does not have screens
-Make them do their homework and turn assignments in on time. Have consewuences if they don't (ie dont allow video game playing six hours a day after school - well, dont allow that at all - but particularly not if they don't turn in their homework etc)
-Make them get summer jobs once they hit sixteen or seventeen.
-Give them chores from a young age.

My just out of college daughter says sadly that they are "losers" and that she would not recommend any girl date them. She had friends she saw in person, summer jobs, activities, turned in her homework etc. I didn't just let her sit around on screens all the time.

I think the "crisis" with boys is that many parents have very low expectations of tehir sons' contrubtiuons to their households and classrooms and society and enjoy using screens as babysitters.

They’re adults. They are in college. You can’t just treat them like children without risking alienation.

?? OP was asking for advice on how to raise KIDS. I was giving her advice on the kid stage.

And they ARE being treated like children even though they are in college, since they don't have to do any chores, get jobs, etc.

So your comment doesn't make sense.

[Anonymous]

f

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know several middle age adult incel/failure to launch men. The parents supported them way too long, gave too many chances. I can tell you that these adult incels will take advantage of women and other people - it's a one way street. They are takers. They have phony personas to cover their spotty employment and lack of accomplishments and adulting. That being said, I also think they may suffer from ongoing depression and alcohol addiction.

I don’t know a single incel. Why do you know so many?

[Anonymous]

Maga created incense

BWI airport some dumb mother let her 16 year old wear a Charlie Kirk t shirt abd her other five kids dumb to a two year old

That’s how you do it racist shits raised by racist dummies

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maga created incense

BWI airport some dumb mother let her 16 year old wear a Charlie Kirk t shirt abd her other five kids dumb to a two year old

That’s how you do it racist shits raised by racist dummies

Are you ok ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know several middle age adult incel/failure to launch men. The parents supported them way too long, gave too many chances. I can tell you that these adult incels will take advantage of women and other people - it's a one way street. They are takers. They have phony personas to cover their spotty employment and lack of accomplishments and adulting. That being said, I also think they may suffer from ongoing depression and alcohol addiction.

I don’t know a single incel. Why do you know so many?

Thank you! I keep asking myself the same question about these posters. Perhaps I don’t see it because our boys are athletes and we gave them a lot of freedom when they were younger.

I wonder if incels are a function of a UMC lifestyle combined with snowplow parenting?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have two stepsons in college who spend all day in their rooms on screens, have never had jobs, have had zero to one extra curric, no chores, have never dated, struggle to pass their classes despite being smart because they are playing video games rather than doing assignments, etc. I don't think they are right wing. But they are failure to launch (Are living at home in college because they like it better than the dorms).

Their mom is MIA. I've known them since junior high but their dad did not give me say in their upbringing. Their dad let them be on screens as much as they wanted. He did not make them get jobs, did not give them any chores, did not make sure they got outside for fresh air and exercise every day.

They literally spent all day, every day this summer in their rooms on screens. Letting dishes pile up in sink. No jobs. No chores. Did not see friends in person, only online.

If I were their parent, I would have changed the wifi password and taken away their devices until they got jobs.

So my advice is:
-Limit screen time
-Require at least one sport or activity per season
-Send them to summer camp that does not have screens
-Make them do their homework and turn assignments in on time. Have consewuences if they don't (ie dont allow video game playing six hours a day after school - well, dont allow that at all - but particularly not if they don't turn in their homework etc)
-Make them get summer jobs once they hit sixteen or seventeen.
-Give them chores from a young age.

My just out of college daughter says sadly that they are "losers" and that she would not recommend any girl date them. She had friends she saw in person, summer jobs, activities, turned in her homework etc. I didn't just let her sit around on screens all the time.

I think the "crisis" with boys is that many parents have very low expectations of tehir sons' contrubtiuons to their households and classrooms and society and enjoy using screens as babysitters.

This is terrible! Are you sure they are not violent? They could be, or possibly become violent

Are the video games used the ultra violent types? I bet at least some of them are

These posts are so much bull shite trolling. No fresh air every day! OMG alert the police. The non stop anxiety some of you have about your sons is so embarrassingly stupid. Did either of you actually attend college?

NP.

Your constant attempts to dismiss the massive and growing incel threat are meaningless.

The fact and proof are that Adolescence was just nominated for a Golden Globe award. And as I already told you, Adolescence has been made free and a recommended part of the UK public schools curriculum.

[Anonymous]

Though there must be millions of these cases, yet another incel murder just dropped in thr news just today,

https://www.pnj.com/story/news/crime/2025/12/05/florida-girl-killed-set-on-fire-pace-danika-troy-gabriel-williams-kimahri-blevins/87610512007/