Before I overreact, am I right to be mad at the school?

[Anonymous]

I think your kid is trying to paint himself as a victim. Or you are. How often does your sweetie find himself in these situations?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m upset because the school has no proof my son said anything (he claims he didn’t and he’s being thrown under the bus, but of course, grain of salt) but they are treating that as a greater offense than having a close and escalating verbal altercation in the hallway that had to be broken up by an adult. (The boy is still in class as we speak. My son thinks he will try to fight him after school now but is afraid to tell anyone because they aren’t on “his side”.)

How does your son know that the he is being "punished" more than the other kid? Was your kid punished? Tell your son not to trash talk people unless he is willing to reap the consequences. Otherwise you are going to raise a titty baby.

Nobody is being punished, that’s the thing. I will absolutely be punishing my son for his mouth, but in the mean time, he’s worried this boy will confront him after school.

Guess he shouldn't run his mouth. Tell him to apologize.

[Anonymous]

Meh, my DD was the shit stirring drama llama once and told Girl B what Girl A (or whatever) said and they all got in trouble. I think she deserved it. That boy has dirty hands as well, it's a jerk move to tell someone something that will only serve to hurt. That wasn't something a friend would do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are out of line. Your kid talked trash and paid the price. School handled fine.

Um, no. Yes, kid was out of line. But physical confrontation -esp over something so dumb- is never ok.

They should both bear responsibility here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m upset because the school has no proof my son said anything (he claims he didn’t and he’s being thrown under the bus, but of course, grain of salt) but they are treating that as a greater offense than having a close and escalating verbal altercation in the hallway that had to be broken up by an adult. (The boy is still in class as we speak. My son thinks he will try to fight him after school now but is afraid to tell anyone because they aren’t on “his side”.)

How does your son know that the he is being "punished" more than the other kid? Was your kid punished? Tell your son not to trash talk people unless he is willing to reap the consequences. Otherwise you are going to raise a titty baby.

Nobody is being punished, that’s the thing. I will absolutely be punishing my son for his mouth, but in the mean time, he’s worried this boy will confront him after school.

He should go tell the school counselor he is afraid to leave after school. Hopefully, he has learned a lesson about talking shiid about people.

[Anonymous]

OP you sound somewhat unstable and emotional.

The school handled this appropriately. No one was hurt. Your son acted poorly and was disciplined as he should have been, but you have no say in whether another child should be disciplined or not. I don't see the problem except maybe you need a mental health day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are out of line. Your kid talked trash and paid the price. School handled fine.

Um, no. Yes, kid was out of line. But physical confrontation -esp over something so dumb- is never ok.

They should both bear responsibility here.

We have zero information that the other kid wasn't also talked to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP you sound somewhat unstable and emotional.

The school handled this appropriately. No one was hurt. Your son acted poorly and was disciplined as he should have been, but you have no say in whether another child should be disciplined or not. I don't see the problem except maybe you need a mental health day.

Agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are out of line. Your kid talked trash and paid the price. School handled fine.

Um, no. Yes, kid was out of line. But physical confrontation -esp over something so dumb- is never ok.

They should both bear responsibility here.

Are you the OP? You never said there was a physical confrontation. You're changing your tune now that you see how the comments are going.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m upset because the school has no proof my son said anything (he claims he didn’t and he’s being thrown under the bus, but of course, grain of salt) but they are treating that as a greater offense than having a close and escalating verbal altercation in the hallway that had to be broken up by an adult. (The boy is still in class as we speak. My son thinks he will try to fight him after school now but is afraid to tell anyone because they aren’t on “his side”.)

Your son now claims he didn’t say anything? In your first post you said your son was talking trash and admitted that to you. Now he claims he didn’t say anything? I think he’s trying to make himself the victim when in actuality he is the one who started this whole situation by making mean comments.

Also “the boy is still in class as we speak.”? Where else would he be? Did you expect this other kid to get suspended because he confronted your son? There are plenty of times kids don’t even get suspended for actually fighting and you’re upset this kid didn’t get suspended for confronting your son about your son’s jerk comment?

[Anonymous]

Here's the problem with phones.

OP's kid just went through this drama. He call's OP at lunch, sobbing about this and telling her the details because he's embarrassed and got reprimanded by the school adults.

But now, OP is (understandably) also upset, worrying about her kid who is sobbing in the bathroom (or whatever) and angry at whoever made him feel this way.

So she's ready to call the school and yell at them, before her son is even home.

If this had been pre phones, kid would have been at school another 4 hours before coming home and retelling this story. At which point, he would be over it or it would be a bad part of the day which is now in the past. They'd talk about not talking poorly about classmates, then move on.

Instead, OP is upset and taking it out on the school, and the school now has to deal with normal kid poor behavior, an angry mom, and a kid who now thinks that by calling mom they will be vindicated. Rinse repeat.

[Anonymous]

In addition to learning that he should think before he speaks, your son has learned another important lesson: Boy A is a shit stirrer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m upset because the school has no proof my son said anything (he claims he didn’t and he’s being thrown under the bus, but of course, grain of salt) but they are treating that as a greater offense than having a close and escalating verbal altercation in the hallway that had to be broken up by an adult. (The boy is still in class as we speak. My son thinks he will try to fight him after school now but is afraid to tell anyone because they aren’t on “his side”.)

Oh please. Calm down until you get all the facts. Yeah, it sucks he's worrying about a consequence that (while frowned upon in modern society) is a tale as old as time. So what was the other boy supposed to do? Calmly explain that he is indeed good at basketball? Not display anger? Not let your kid know the impact of his words? And why is he even on his phone telling you about it? Guilt, that emotion that comes when you know you done screwed up.

[Anonymous]

No you are not. School is doing the best they can. Your kid needs to learn not to talk trash. Glad he’s calling you though. Guess he now knows friend B is not a friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are out of line. Your kid talked trash and paid the price. School handled fine.

Um, no. Yes, kid was out of line. But physical confrontation -esp over something so dumb- is never ok.

They should both bear responsibility here.

Are you the OP? You never said there was a physical confrontation. You're changing your tune now that you see how the comments are going.

Yup, and I’ll bet you the other kid said something like, “If you have something to say to me, say it to my face”, and then there was verbal sparring. You don’t know it would have become physical. You said it escalated, which means the son was giving it back. Maybe if he’d apologized for trash talking, this would be over.