Be honest- what do you think about women who are content to be just wives and mothers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Why are you so judgemental against others who make different lifestyle choices than yourself?

Good question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I want to know what their Plan B is when the kids leave for college or if a divorce happens.

I have a bunch of money. I’m more like someone who retired really early than like someone who was dying to be a SAHM. I didn’t really like my job so it was an easy call.

[Anonymous]

Different strokes for different folks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think about them.

I do think about them once who are divorced or widowed because people make go fund me accounts and I think, nope.

This is real scarcity mindset. No one who is doing well financially when married is doing gofundme b/c of a divorce.

Statistics don’t support your assertion. Widowed and divorced women take a huge hit financially and it increases their chances of living in poverty significantly.

[Anonymous]

Unless they perform at a very high level, most employees will be forgotten within a few years of leaving their job. The work will continue on with someone else at the desk.

I’ve worked and I’ve been a SAHM. My most important contribution to society is not how much money I made, how many papers I pushed, or how many public accolades I received, but how happy and well adjusted my family is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I want to know what their Plan B is when the kids leave for college or if a divorce happens.

Plan B: For college - enjoy the freedom of not being a cook, housekeeper, laundry, and personal driver. If divorce happens, my spouse knows I'll go after everything but I cannot imagine divorce happening. The bigger concern is death and we have a paid-off house, college fund, savings and I'd get social security. And, life insurance. I could pick up a basic job if I wanted/needed to and be just fine. Believe it or not, some plan for these things. Death worries me more. I hope to die first.

Sounds like my best friend, except it took him 10 years to die. It drained their finances. He was 40 when he got sick. Social security is decades away and not that much when someone only working until 40.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unless they perform at a very high level, most employees will be forgotten within a few years of leaving their job. The work will continue on with someone else at the desk.

I’ve worked and I’ve been a SAHM. My most important contribution to society is not how much money I made, how many papers I pushed, or how many public accolades I received, but how happy and well adjusted my family is.

Same when you empty nest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think about them.

I do think about them once who are divorced or widowed because people make go fund me accounts and I think, nope.

But you do get to feel smug and superior so they are adding to your quality of life, right?

Neither smug nor superior.

Nope. I just am not giving them money because they refuse to work for money.

I don’t understand not working but begging for money. Get a job!

+1

[Anonymous]

I don't think about them. I barely keep up with my own choices.

[Anonymous]

Some mothers like working. My mom worked again by the time I was two. I have worked except for maternity leaves and other very brief periods when my health was bad.

Others find it soul crushing.

The same is true of mothers who SAH.

I wish everyone had what they needed to do what they found helps them thrive

[Anonymous]

Just like all working woman aren't identical, neither are SAHMs. Every human's needs, wants, circumstances, resources, abilities, desires, resources, relationships are different.

Being judgmental only reflects on the person who thinks too much of themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You mean people like me, who are very well-read, can discuss most current events with intelligence and some background knowledge, and also earn significant passive income from my dividends?

I'm doing great, thank you. Feel free to think whatever you want about me.

That fact that you replied sort of indicates you care what people think.

I only judge those that do not contribute in any way to society - volunteer work, pta, kids activities, anything. If all they do is care for their kids, then I judge them as incredibly selfish and lazy.

And what if they're looking after a child with special needs? Or another relative? What if they themselves have a chronic illness and cannot work?
What if the special needs or illness in question is invisible to you?

Judging based on incomplete information is not wise, PP. You never know what's going on in people's lives. Have a little respect and humility.

🙄 that’s exactly what I was saying - they contribute NOTHING to society. Going down the tangent of disabilities for the parent is way off OP’s topic and you know it.

I’m talking about people who get the non special needs kids to school, hit the gym/spa/nail grab lunch with friends, pick up kids and drive them to activities. Then go home and do it all over the next day for 18 years. Then continue to do nothing outside of their own pleasures. Completely selfish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends HOW they do it. My mother was a SAHM and our house was always dirty and she was always laying on the couch in her nightgown watching soaps and talk shows when I came home. It wasn't some super clean house with cookies fresh from the oven after school. She never made me breakfast. She never decorated the house for any holidays. She often "forgot" to take anything out to defrost for dinner and we scrambled to pull together a meal.

So someone like that, I don't feel good. A friend of mine is a SAHM and she gets dressed each morning when her kids do, makes them breakfast, makes their lunches with them, keeps up the house, is always arranging play dates, does holiday decor, makes homemade treats for her kids to pass out to their classes for their birthdays, invites people over spontaneously, etc. She's a great SAHM. She treats it like a full time job.

I do all that and I work, so am I a superhuman (yes, yes we are).

Believe it or not, EVERYTHING is not about YOU, you freaking narcissist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think their kids are lucky.

It depends on the parent. My mom worked and we hated when she took a day off or was home, same with my dad as it was always drama. My mom was miserable being home and hated being a parent. I love being home and tending to things to make everything easier. There is no way mine could do everything they do in terms of school and activities if I didn't handle a lot of it. My spouse works mainly from home and helps a lot but lots of things I do that my mom would never do (i.e. care for elderly relatives, activities, etc.).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
You mean people like me, who are very well-read, can discuss most current events with intelligence and some background knowledge, and also earn significant passive income from my dividends?

I'm doing great, thank you. Feel free to think whatever you want about me.

Dividends, by definition, are unearned. And they don’t generate income. But more importantly, none of this unique to being a SAHM.