My Fiance told me yesterday that he wants me to move out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have any kind of written co-ownership agreement?

There is no written co- ownership agreement in place.

Call a lawyer today. What area are you in?

I'm in Virginia.

[Anonymous]

Is your name on the house title?

[Anonymous]

why would you buy a house together if not married

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow! My heart goes out to you OP. I agree with others in that don’t move not one iota. He is making an emotional decision on something that is contractual and in the eyes of the court - emotions won’t be considered. They will look at the terms of the agreement only. For the time being, document and collect every bill you have paid half on and proof of payment towards mortgage. Next step- shut down communication. Don’t get into why he wants to break up or any of it. Just shut down your emotions. Feed your children, get on the phone with an attorney, sleep in the bedroom with them and get on a schedule so you can avoid this jackass. For your own mental sake start looking for an apartment or an Airbnb and just line up a place to land. If I knew you in real life I would open my home. You can’t change the past and no shame in your reason for moving in before a ring or any of that. People do switcharoos all the time. Have a good cry in private spaces and then screw your head on to keep moving. And when/if he comes to his senses - you need to be so far gone from his life that he has to use a shovel to dig you up from his memory. My heart goes out to you! Sending a special prayer for you on this day.

Done, done and done. He lost me when he announced that the relationship was over and demanded that I move out for no valid reason other than because he said so. That is for sure not the way you treat someone that you supposedly loved. Thank you for holding me in your prayers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have any kind of written co-ownership agreement?

There is no written co- ownership agreement in place.

Call a lawyer today. What area are you in?

I'm in Virginia.

Stafford County? Not many counties in NoVA where houses are that cheap, and school has already started.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is your name on the house title?

yes, both our names are on the title and deed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is your name on the house title?

yes, both our names are on the title and deed.

Best sell and ditch this mistake. Better now than when married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:why would you buy a house together if not married

Because we were in what I thought at the time was a long term loving relationship and planning to get married?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have any kind of written co-ownership agreement?

There is no written co- ownership agreement in place.

Call a lawyer today. What area are you in?

I'm in Virginia.

Stafford County? Not many counties in NoVA where houses are that cheap, and school has already started.

Or Culpepper.

[Anonymous]

Op any way you can get a single mom roomate? Any way He would be willing to let you stay there at least this school year? Tell him that if you two wait a year, you are more likely to make at least some profit on the sale. At this point you'd lose money with all the costs you put into the purchase and moving etc.

Are there other housing options you could swing alone? An apartment?

[Anonymous]

Don’t panic over the O2 sensor, it won’t disable your car - you can definitely wait a few weeks if that fits your budget better. I speak from long experience with O2 sensors and what mechanics have always told me.

I caution you against agreeing to his new terms for paying utilities, wherein you pay up front and he’s going to pay you back (sure, right). You need to demand that he fork over the cash the day the bill is paid, or that he provide the card he’s been providing all along. There is no reason for him to be changing that situation except that he’s getting ready to cheat you. Is his name on the utilities, or just yours?

Please, embrace your inner cynic and second guess everything he says or does. Be suspicious. He has just utterly betrayed you and warrants no benefit of the doubt and no continued loyalty from you, he is a snake in the grass and you must operate from the expectation that he is looking to strike at every turn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:why would you buy a house together if not married

Because we were in what I thought at the time was a long term loving relationship and planning to get married?

When was the wedding date? He might be getting cold feet.

[Anonymous]

He sounds extremely selfish and immature. Stay in the house with your children and lwt let him be silent. Agree with the other posters that you should consult a lawyer concerning the house.

[Anonymous]

He's definitely seeing someone. Is that how his prior marriage ended? Cheating?

Blending homes/kids without being married, buying a home together without being married is crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op any way you can get a single mom roomate? Any way He would be willing to let you stay there at least this school year? Tell him that if you two wait a year, you are more likely to make at least some profit on the sale. At this point you'd lose money with all the costs you put into the purchase and moving etc.

Are there other housing options you could swing alone? An apartment?

I know a neighbor who is a single mom. We first met at the bus stop when we found out that our elementary school kids are the same age. We are not close though, I'd say we are friendly acquaintances. Her oldest child moved out of the house this year and now it's just her and her youngest. She mentioned when we first me that she's probably going to sell in a few years (to downsize) since she doesn't need a whole single family house for just her and her kid.

If my ex and I end up selling within the next 30-60 days (his timeline) and I am not able to secure another place (purchase or rental) to live in. I have considered reaching out to my neighbor to ask if I could rent a room/basement in her house, etc until another opportunity for me to buy in our community opens up.

In my less than 24 hours of research it seems like there may be a couple of options...

I heard from a neighbor that another neighbor (who I don't know) is going to be listing their house for sale this week and I am considering reaching out to them to see if I can buy their house. I just don't know if I can get everything together in time (loan paperwork, buyer's agent etc) to put in an offer this week. Also, lets say I rush to make an offer on that house this week, and it's accepted then I'm on the hook for the mortgage here and the new mortgage there. I'm just not sure if the timeframes line up and if rushing into something that I know is about to hit the market would be a smart decision before finalizing what my ex and I are going to do with our current house.

There is also a second option... We are in a newer community and the builder recently announced that they are about to start building some townhouses nearby. The builder hasn't released the home sites yet and I don't even know what the expected completion date of the new town homes would be. They will probably be priced at high 300's/ low 400's which I could swing.

I totally agree that we'd lose money on the sale of our single family home but honestly for me at this point it's not about the money. After understanding the reality of the situation I know that I need to protect myself and the kids, even if it means loosing thousands. Plus, I already know that there is no way he'd agree to me staying here for a year when all he wants is to keep the house and kick me out.

Furthermore, if the a**holery that he has displayed in the last 24 hours since his big announcement is indicative of what is yet to come, I could see things getting really bad and I don't think it's best to prolong something that could quickly turn from an uncomfortable to a high conflict situation.

Regarding other housing options - Yes, I could swing something alone and have since yesterday been looking for sale properties/rentals to have an understanding of what my options are but there's not much on the market right now in our school district.