Spouse will not respect my need for sleep

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Honestly I’d be upset if my dh went to bed at 9:30...


That sounds like a You Problem.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Honestly I’d be upset if my dh went to bed at 9:30...


All that says about you is that you are immature, selfish, controlling a jerk...


Or that I enjoy my dhs company?


DP. But only on your own terms. So still, immature, selfish, controlling jerk.
Anonymous
I am astounded at anyone who would f*ck with someone else sleep. Utterly astounded.

Signed, DW who needs her sleep and always has and because of that had parents who NEVER had to worry about any sort of curfew

People are made differently.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Honestly I’d be upset if my dh went to bed at 9:30...


All that says about you is that you are immature, selfish, controlling a jerk...


Or that I enjoy my dhs company?


You can enjoy his company when he’s awake, and respect his need for sleep and his natural sleep cycle even if you don’t understand it.
Anonymous
If the problem is that OP/DW wants to spend more time with DH, I'm trying to understand why it's up to him to stay up later, instead of up to her to get up later? or splitting the difference?
Anonymous
^^^"up to her to get up earlier"
Anonymous
Yeah that's really passive aggressive. That kind of stuff usually means deep resentment, anger. There is more than just the bedtime routine isn't there?
Anonymous
Are you going to sleep early to avoid her?

how old are your kids? do they really need help getting ready for school?

do you always miss the kids bedtime?

how long have you been doing this? did you tell her the same when your kids were ready little ?

have you considered changing your behavior and stop being so rigid? go to bed a half hour later for example?
Anonymous
Wow. These responses are so interesting. So many people recommending OP compromise by going to bed later, asking if he (I'm assuming) really needs 9 hours of sleep, etc. At the end of the day he's voiced his concerns to his wife and instead of her speaking up she's being a passive aggressive jerk. This could very well be a deal-breaker for me.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Are you going to sleep early to avoid her?

how old are your kids? do they really need help getting ready for school?

do you always miss the kids bedtime?

how long have you been doing this? did you tell her the same when your kids were ready little ?

have you considered changing your behavior and stop being so rigid? go to bed a half hour later for example?


Why can’t the wife change her behavior and get up earlier if it’s really about “spending more time together,” instead of being a passive aggressive, childish twit?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Wow. These responses are so interesting. So many people recommending OP compromise by going to bed later, asking if he (I'm assuming) really needs 9 hours of sleep, etc. At the end of the day he's voiced his concerns to his wife and instead of her speaking up she's being a passive aggressive jerk. This could very well be a deal-breaker for me.


Yeah, I’m fascinated by all the people who think if you lie in bed for nine hours, you get nine hours of sleep. They’re very lucky if that’s the case and many of us are not wired that way. Before I had kids, I kept hearing how “parents are so exhausted, they fall asleep the minute their heads hit the pillow,” but no matter how tired I am, it’s never been that way.
Anonymous
Guys, just sleep in separate bedrooms at least part of the time.

Tonight I am exhausted. I am currently currently cuddled up in my bed, my husband just kissed me a nice kiss goodnight (we might have had sex if not for my period), and I am about to start reading my book for an hour in supreme and amazing peace before drifting off to sleep.

If this is the only thing you fight about then you are lucky because it is an easy fix!!!

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Are you going to sleep early to avoid her?

how old are your kids? do they really need help getting ready for school?

do you always miss the kids bedtime?

how long have you been doing this? did you tell her the same when your kids were ready little ?

have you considered changing your behavior and stop being so rigid? go to bed a half hour later for example?


Why can’t the wife change her behavior and get up earlier if it’s really about “spending more time together,” instead of being a passive aggressive, childish twit?


Maybe she is tired from dealing with the kids all evening ?
Anonymous
OP, are you doing housework and/or getting the kids off to school in the morning, so that she can sleep in?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Are you going to sleep early to avoid her?

how old are your kids? do they really need help getting ready for school?

do you always miss the kids bedtime?

how long have you been doing this? did you tell her the same when your kids were ready little ?

have you considered changing your behavior and stop being so rigid? go to bed a half hour later for example?


Why can’t the wife change her behavior and get up earlier if it’s really about “spending more time together,” instead of being a passive aggressive, childish twit?


Maybe she is tired from dealing with the kids all evening ?


Then she should put the kids down and go to bed earlier, not demand OP stay up to entertain her like a child.
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