S/O Why do you care if moms stay home?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also, if you guys are talking about husbands draining accounts, hiding assets etc.: first of all, know what your husband's paycheck amount is and where all the money is going. If you are middle class, it is truly unlikely that your husband will be able to siphon significant amount of money without a judge finding out easily based on your lifestyle expectations (in which case, your husband will also pay a large fine because that kind of behavior is illegal). If you are rich, okay, maybe your husband can drain off significant amounts of money into another account, buy a boat during your divorce, etc., without anyone noticing, BUT you are also rich, so while you may not get what you deserve in that divorce, that are you still going to get enough money that you won't be poor after the divorce by any means.

Instead of all of this paranoia why don't you and your dh sit down with a financial advisor and get all this stuff laid out and get a plan for your future in place.

Whether you are working or SAH, if your spouse is a dishonorable, untrustworthy type who you can see screwing you over big time when you hit retirement age then you might seriously want to talk to an attorney now because being married to a person like that is probably not in your best interests.

Hey kids. Mommy trusts daddy enough to sleep with him and to allow him to make medical decisions for me if I'm unable, but I don't trust him with my money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have learned one thing from this thread. Rich SAHMs are easily triggered into arguing and will go on and on about their personal situation to prove their point.

Hello. You are a teeny tiny minority. Your situation likely does not apply to anyone else. Also, you just sound insecure. Just ignore the triggering posts. That will bug em more than you responding.

Y’all need to stop and either care for your kids or get back to work.

Rich or fairly well off SAHM are not a teeny tiny minority HERE. The women who stay at home in Vienna or Chevy Chase and post here are probably pretty well off, no? We are talking about DC and this area, not middle America or Florida or something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have learned one thing from this thread. Rich SAHMs are easily triggered into arguing and will go on and on about their personal situation to prove their point.

Hello. You are a teeny tiny minority. Your situation likely does not apply to anyone else. Also, you just sound insecure. Just ignore the triggering posts. That will bug em more than you responding.

Y’all need to stop and either care for your kids or get back to work.

Rich or fairly well off SAHM are not a teeny tiny minority HERE. The women who stay at home in Vienna or Chevy Chase and post here are probably pretty well off, no? We are talking about DC and this area, not middle America or Florida or something.

It's especially biased because we are talking about mid-day Wednesday...you'll notice lots of posters on this board during that time are
-SAHMs who have school-aged or older children (there seem to be a lot of moms of high school and jr. high aged kids here during the day)
-moms who WOH in those coveted unicorn flexible jobs that let them take breaks to post here or WAH

The moms who are busy executives, biglaw lawyers who are busy billing to clients, etc. are not here in large numbers. The moms who have jobs like teaching and medical professions that require them to be present are not here at those hours. The moms who are SAHMS to four kids including an infant and a toddler are not here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have learned one thing from this thread. Rich SAHMs are easily triggered into arguing and will go on and on about their personal situation to prove their point.

Hello. You are a teeny tiny minority. Your situation likely does not apply to anyone else. Also, you just sound insecure. Just ignore the triggering posts. That will bug em more than you responding.

Y’all need to stop and either care for your kids or get back to work.

Rich or fairly well off SAHM are not a teeny tiny minority HERE. The women who stay at home in Vienna or Chevy Chase and post here are probably pretty well off, no? We are talking about DC and this area, not middle America or Florida or something.

It's especially biased because we are talking about mid-day Wednesday...you'll notice lots of posters on this board during that time are
-SAHMs who have school-aged or older children (there seem to be a lot of moms of high school and jr. high aged kids here during the day)
-moms who WOH in those coveted unicorn flexible jobs that let them take breaks to post here or WAH

The moms who are busy executives, biglaw lawyers who are busy billing to clients, etc. are not here in large numbers. The moms who have jobs like teaching and medical professions that require them to be present are not here at those hours. The moms who are SAHMS to four kids including an infant and a toddler are not here.

Toddler mom here. Mid-afternoon is toddler naptime - and actually naptime for most other babies, too.

[Anonymous]

Anybody getting tired of these threads yet?

As someone who is strongly on one side of this debate I am still getting tired of all the mischaracterization of what those on both sides try to say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have learned one thing from this thread. Rich SAHMs are easily triggered into arguing and will go on and on about their personal situation to prove their point.

Hello. You are a teeny tiny minority. Your situation likely does not apply to anyone else. Also, you just sound insecure. Just ignore the triggering posts. That will bug em more than you responding.

Y’all need to stop and either care for your kids or get back to work.

Rich or fairly well off SAHM are not a teeny tiny minority HERE. The women who stay at home in Vienna or Chevy Chase and post here are probably pretty well off, no? We are talking about DC and this area, not middle America or Florida or something.

I live in Florida and the majority of families need 2 incomes to live comfortably. A lot of parents stay home with the children for the first few years but they all go back to work eventually. A lot of people think Florida is cheap but that’s not necessarily true. If you live in a nice city in major city houses at at least 300-400k. We live in Miami but have lived in other cities. It’s harder to find higher paying jobs here. My husbands income is 105k. That’s not enough for me to be a sahm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have learned one thing from this thread. Rich SAHMs are easily triggered into arguing and will go on and on about their personal situation to prove their point.

Hello. You are a teeny tiny minority. Your situation likely does not apply to anyone else. Also, you just sound insecure. Just ignore the triggering posts. That will bug em more than you responding.

Y’all need to stop and either care for your kids or get back to work.

Rich or fairly well off SAHM are not a teeny tiny minority HERE. The women who stay at home in Vienna or Chevy Chase and post here are probably pretty well off, no? We are talking about DC and this area, not middle America or Florida or something.

I live in Florida and the majority of families need 2 incomes to live comfortably. A lot of parents stay home with the children for the first few years but they all go back to work eventually. A lot of people think Florida is cheap but that’s not necessarily true. If you live in a nice city in major city houses at at least 300-400k. We live in Miami but have lived in other cities. It’s harder to find higher paying jobs here. My husbands income is 105k. That’s not enough for me to be a sahm.

That’s half what it costs here. And yes I get that incomes are higher here too. So is educational status. My point stands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have learned one thing from this thread. Rich SAHMs are easily triggered into arguing and will go on and on about their personal situation to prove their point.

Hello. You are a teeny tiny minority. Your situation likely does not apply to anyone else. Also, you just sound insecure. Just ignore the triggering posts. That will bug em more than you responding.

Y’all need to stop and either care for your kids or get back to work.

Rich or fairly well off SAHM are not a teeny tiny minority HERE. The women who stay at home in Vienna or Chevy Chase and post here are probably pretty well off, no? We are talking about DC and this area, not middle America or Florida or something.

OMG, yes they are. Stay away from sharp objects, PP. That bubble of yours will pop all over you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anybody getting tired of these threads yet?

As someone who is strongly on one side of this debate I am still getting tired of all the mischaracterization of what those on both sides try to say.

This is the worst part of these threads.

One PP says something, and another PP completely misinterprets it as a personal insult.

The second PP then proceeds to type five paragraphs about their personal situation and blah blah blah that anecdote is supposed to refute the misunderstood post from the first PP.

lather, rinse, repeat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have learned one thing from this thread. Rich SAHMs are easily triggered into arguing and will go on and on about their personal situation to prove their point.

Hello. You are a teeny tiny minority. Your situation likely does not apply to anyone else. Also, you just sound insecure. Just ignore the triggering posts. That will bug em more than you responding.

Y’all need to stop and either care for your kids or get back to work.

Rich or fairly well off SAHM are not a teeny tiny minority HERE. The women who stay at home in Vienna or Chevy Chase and post here are probably pretty well off, no? We are talking about DC and this area, not middle America or Florida or something.

OMG, yes they are. Stay away from sharp objects, PP. That bubble of yours will pop all over you.

What are you going on about? Or are you including the lower income black and Hispanic stats from DC? I’m sorry, but the vast majority of DCURM posters are not in that group. We are for the most part privileged and well educated. It’s a rarified area and sharply divided along racial lines unfortunately. I just looked up stats for my zip code and our poverty rate is 2% with medium income well over 100k. And mind you I live in what is considered a diverse area for this part of the suburbs: only 70-something percent white.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I never jump into these stupid debates and did not read the prior posts, but for this one I have to, because the OP betrays the total ignorance about history, women's rights, and the role of women in society.

It is not just about what you, Cindy Lou, decide to do with your career once you have kids. It's about the bigger picture, and the fact that when women are not able to, for various reasons, combine career with family, or when we collectively as a society start to spin a narrative that children are hurt when women work, then women feel pressured to drop out, or guilted into dropping out, or forced into it, and then women (and children) suffer the consequences, for example:

-when you have only male OB/GYNs who force you into c-sections and many other procedures because of a lack of understanding or care for what women face
-when there is less money given in the budget process of government to education, or protection for families, because men typically value these things less
-- when you get no paid maternity leave because CEOs are all men and so are the legislators
-- when scientists run studies only on male subjects because they assume women are the same
-- when rape kids go untouched because it's simply not a priority for police departments (mostly male)
-when you have no access to birth control because male legislators don't value it

I could go on and on. All of the above is part of our history and was part of our reality for hundreds/thousands of years. This is why women have fought to be in the workplace. So when SAHMs start talking about "who cares when women aren't part of the workforce," well that is just completely stupid.

Sorry, but don’t agree. My csections were encouraged by women — and my crappy follow up care was completed by women. I don’t think it’s fair to just blame societys’ issues on men. It’s not just men holding women back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anybody getting tired of these threads yet?

As someone who is strongly on one side of this debate I am still getting tired of all the mischaracterization of what those on both sides try to say.

I agree and I’m strongly on one side also.
Studies saying kids all turn out the same regardless (assuming similar family SES) are interesting as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never jump into these stupid debates and did not read the prior posts, but for this one I have to, because the OP betrays the total ignorance about history, women's rights, and the role of women in society.

It is not just about what you, Cindy Lou, decide to do with your career once you have kids. It's about the bigger picture, and the fact that when women are not able to, for various reasons, combine career with family, or when we collectively as a society start to spin a narrative that children are hurt when women work, then women feel pressured to drop out, or guilted into dropping out, or forced into it, and then women (and children) suffer the consequences, for example:

-when you have only male OB/GYNs who force you into c-sections and many other procedures because of a lack of understanding or care for what women face
-when there is less money given in the budget process of government to education, or protection for families, because men typically value these things less
-- when you get no paid maternity leave because CEOs are all men and so are the legislators
-- when scientists run studies only on male subjects because they assume women are the same
-- when rape kids go untouched because it's simply not a priority for police departments (mostly male)
-when you have no access to birth control because male legislators don't value it

I could go on and on. All of the above is part of our history and was part of our reality for hundreds/thousands of years. This is why women have fought to be in the workplace. So when SAHMs start talking about "who cares when women aren't part of the workforce," well that is just completely stupid.

Sorry, but don’t agree. My csections were encouraged by women — and my crappy follow up care was completed by women. I don’t think it’s fair to just blame societys’ issues on men. It’s not just men holding women back.

Same here! And not just a female doctor, but two female doctors of the same minority group I’m in. It’s really no use making generalizations.

[Anonymous]

There are good and bad moms of all working or non-working backgrounds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have learned one thing from this thread. Rich SAHMs are easily triggered into arguing and will go on and on about their personal situation to prove their point.

Hello. You are a teeny tiny minority. Your situation likely does not apply to anyone else. Also, you just sound insecure. Just ignore the triggering posts. That will bug em more than you responding.

Y’all need to stop and either care for your kids or get back to work.

Rich or fairly well off SAHM are not a teeny tiny minority HERE. The women who stay at home in Vienna or Chevy Chase and post here are probably pretty well off, no? We are talking about DC and this area, not middle America or Florida or something.

OMG, yes they are. Stay away from sharp objects, PP. That bubble of yours will pop all over you.

What are you going on about? Or are you including the lower income black and Hispanic stats from DC? I’m sorry, but the vast majority of DCURM posters are not in that group. We are for the most part privileged and well educated. It’s a rarified area and sharply divided along racial lines unfortunately. I just looked up stats for my zip code and our poverty rate is 2% with medium income well over 100k. And mind you I live in what is considered a diverse area for this part of the suburbs: only 70-something percent white.

The DC area has one of the lower percentages of SAHMs compared to other cities across the country (look it up). Therefore, regardless of education level, SAHMs are highly likely to be a minority on here to begin with. Even here, rich SAHMs will be a subset of that. Teeny minority here, teeny tiny minority in the country. But man are they vocal on here. It's the entitlement, I think.