S/O Why do you care if moms stay home?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually don't care what people do. I just care how they talk about it. And I've found a lot of SAHMs talk about staying home as if I'm all but dooming my kids to prison by being a working mom.

"Do they even know you?"
"Do you die inside when they cry for the nanny instead of you?"
"You'll never get this time back."

Don't forget, "I could never let a stranger raise my child."

But I don't care if moms choose to sah either, except when they have too much time on their hands and get all overly involved in my kid's school and inflict obligations on me that I don't care about or have time for and then want to be appreciated for their "contributions."

Yes, that one and "why even have kids if you don't want to spend time with them?" really get me. Things no one says to working dads....

[Anonymous]

Oh yes! The letting strangers raise the children. But is soon as they hit kindergarten it’s all OK. ?

[Anonymous]

I personally haven't met anyone who disliked SAHM's, and if I did I wouldn't care an ounce.

-SAHM

[Anonymous]

On a personal level it doesn’t bother me at all. I have friends who SAHM.

For some reason it illogically bothers me wrt divorce and alimony. Which is dumb bc I’m unlikely to divorce. But on a policy level I don’t like that I wouldn’t get as much alimony / child support because I work. I think the chips should fall where they lie. I can’t get back time with my kids so they shouldn’t get money lost.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) it doesn’t affect me on a personal level, but make no mistake it affects me from the level that when they retire, they haven’t paid into the system for however many years. Just coatailling their husband and taking money working people have put into the system through FICA.
Claiming to have “the most important and hardest” job in the world. Sorry babe, once your kids are in elementary school, you are living a life of leisure, stop pretending otherwise.
2) I don’t care other than believing they are lazy and persist on continuing the stereotype of dependence on men versus contributing to equality.

This exactly. I believe that they are bringing all women down by allowing companies to justify the fact that all women quit when they have kids etc. Even worse when they have daughters and push them so hard academically. SAHMs of a daughter at a fancy private school? And they don’t even see the hypocrisy.

Goes double for those who have degrees from fancy institutions that could’ve gone to someone who would actually use them.

No, I actually think it is people with attitudes like this who bring all women down. Think it through.

Yes. Depending on your husband’s salary and being totally impotent without him - And with no identity outside of your husband and children - completely raises up women.

Do you look yourself in the mirror believing in this?

Troll

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) it doesn’t affect me on a personal level, but make no mistake it affects me from the level that when they retire, they haven’t paid into the system for however many years. Just coatailling their husband and taking money working people have put into the system through FICA.
Claiming to have “the most important and hardest” job in the world. Sorry babe, once your kids are in elementary school, you are living a life of leisure, stop pretending otherwise.
2) I don’t care other than believing they are lazy and persist on continuing the stereotype of dependence on men versus contributing to equality.

This exactly. I believe that they are bringing all women down by allowing companies to justify the fact that all women quit when they have kids etc. Even worse when they have daughters and push them so hard academically. SAHMs of a daughter at a fancy private school? And they don’t even see the hypocrisy.

Goes double for those who have degrees from fancy institutions that could’ve gone to someone who would actually use them.

So... Even though it makes me happier to stay home with my daughter while she's little, I'm supposed to keep working for the benefit of YOUR career....?
Also, I did use my degree for several years before having children, and I plan to use it again. But I don't agree that a career is the only reason to get a college degree. I'm an educated citizen, which in the end is probably the bigger benefit to society of my education, vs what I'd be doing with my degree in some corporate office. Should I have stopped at a high school degree if I planned to stay home for a few years with my kids? Should I have not gone to school at all....?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) it doesn’t affect me on a personal level, but make no mistake it affects me from the level that when they retire, they haven’t paid into the system for however many years. Just coatailling their husband and taking money working people have put into the system through FICA.
Claiming to have “the most important and hardest” job in the world. Sorry babe, once your kids are in elementary school, you are living a life of leisure, stop pretending otherwise.
2) I don’t care other than believing they are lazy and persist on continuing the stereotype of dependence on men versus contributing to equality.

This exactly. I believe that they are bringing all women down by allowing companies to justify the fact that all women quit when they have kids etc. Even worse when they have daughters and push them so hard academically. SAHMs of a daughter at a fancy private school? And they don’t even see the hypocrisy.

Goes double for those who have degrees from fancy institutions that could’ve gone to someone who would actually use them.

No, I actually think it is people with attitudes like this who bring all women down. Think it through.

Yes. Depending on your husband’s salary and being totally impotent without him - And with no identity outside of your husband and children - completely raises up women.

Do you look yourself in the mirror believing in this?

Troll

Don’t even know what you mean. Totally legitimate thought. Bringing women down our women who work to support themselves? Alrighty!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) it doesn’t affect me on a personal level, but make no mistake it affects me from the level that when they retire, they haven’t paid into the system for however many years. Just coatailling their husband and taking money working people have put into the system through FICA.
Claiming to have “the most important and hardest” job in the world. Sorry babe, once your kids are in elementary school, you are living a life of leisure, stop pretending otherwise.
2) I don’t care other than believing they are lazy and persist on continuing the stereotype of dependence on men versus contributing to equality.

This exactly. I believe that they are bringing all women down by allowing companies to justify the fact that all women quit when they have kids etc. Even worse when they have daughters and push them so hard academically. SAHMs of a daughter at a fancy private school? And they don’t even see the hypocrisy.

Goes double for those who have degrees from fancy institutions that could’ve gone to someone who would actually use them.

So... Even though it makes me happier to stay home with my daughter while she's little, I'm supposed to keep working for the benefit of YOUR career....?
Also, I did use my degree for several years before having children, and I plan to use it again. But I don't agree that a career is the only reason to get a college degree. I'm an educated citizen, which in the end is probably the bigger benefit to society of my education, vs what I'd be doing with my degree in some corporate office. Should I have stopped at a high school degree if I planned to stay home for a few years with my kids? Should I have not gone to school at all....?

You are obviously about you and not about the greater good. Your daughter will not benefit from that. Read the studies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) it doesn’t affect me on a personal level, but make no mistake it affects me from the level that when they retire, they haven’t paid into the system for however many years. Just coatailling their husband and taking money working people have put into the system through FICA.
Claiming to have “the most important and hardest” job in the world. Sorry babe, once your kids are in elementary school, you are living a life of leisure, stop pretending otherwise.
2) I don’t care other than believing they are lazy and persist on continuing the stereotype of dependence on men versus contributing to equality.

This exactly. I believe that they are bringing all women down by allowing companies to justify the fact that all women quit when they have kids etc. Even worse when they have daughters and push them so hard academically. SAHMs of a daughter at a fancy private school? And they don’t even see the hypocrisy.

Goes double for those who have degrees from fancy institutions that could’ve gone to someone who would actually use them.

So... Even though it makes me happier to stay home with my daughter while she's little, I'm supposed to keep working for the benefit of YOUR career....?
Also, I did use my degree for several years before having children, and I plan to use it again. But I don't agree that a career is the only reason to get a college degree. I'm an educated citizen, which in the end is probably the bigger benefit to society of my education, vs what I'd be doing with my degree in some corporate office. Should I have stopped at a high school degree if I planned to stay home for a few years with my kids? Should I have not gone to school at all....?

You are obviously about you and not about the greater good. Your daughter will not benefit from that. Read the studies.

I did. They say all I have to do is work before she's 14. But yea, sorry, I do care more about my happiness and my own family than about your career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) it doesn’t affect me on a personal level, but make no mistake it affects me from the level that when they retire, they haven’t paid into the system for however many years. Just coatailling their husband and taking money working people have put into the system through FICA.
Claiming to have “the most important and hardest” job in the world. Sorry babe, once your kids are in elementary school, you are living a life of leisure, stop pretending otherwise.
2) I don’t care other than believing they are lazy and persist on continuing the stereotype of dependence on men versus contributing to equality.

This exactly. I believe that they are bringing all women down by allowing companies to justify the fact that all women quit when they have kids etc. Even worse when they have daughters and push them so hard academically. SAHMs of a daughter at a fancy private school? And they don’t even see the hypocrisy.

Goes double for those who have degrees from fancy institutions that could’ve gone to someone who would actually use them.

So... Even though it makes me happier to stay home with my daughter while she's little, I'm supposed to keep working for the benefit of YOUR career....?
Also, I did use my degree for several years before having children, and I plan to use it again. But I don't agree that a career is the only reason to get a college degree. I'm an educated citizen, which in the end is probably the bigger benefit to society of my education, vs what I'd be doing with my degree in some corporate office. Should I have stopped at a high school degree if I planned to stay home for a few years with my kids? Should I have not gone to school at all....?

PP, don’t even engage with this person. They have to be trolling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) it doesn’t affect me on a personal level, but make no mistake it affects me from the level that when they retire, they haven’t paid into the system for however many years. Just coatailling their husband and taking money working people have put into the system through FICA.
Claiming to have “the most important and hardest” job in the world. Sorry babe, once your kids are in elementary school, you are living a life of leisure, stop pretending otherwise.
2) I don’t care other than believing they are lazy and persist on continuing the stereotype of dependence on men versus contributing to equality.

This exactly. I believe that they are bringing all women down by allowing companies to justify the fact that all women quit when they have kids etc. Even worse when they have daughters and push them so hard academically. SAHMs of a daughter at a fancy private school? And they don’t even see the hypocrisy.

Goes double for those who have degrees from fancy institutions that could’ve gone to someone who would actually use them.

So... Even though it makes me happier to stay home with my daughter while she's little, I'm supposed to keep working for the benefit of YOUR career....?
Also, I did use my degree for several years before having children, and I plan to use it again. But I don't agree that a career is the only reason to get a college degree. I'm an educated citizen, which in the end is probably the bigger benefit to society of my education, vs what I'd be doing with my degree in some corporate office. Should I have stopped at a high school degree if I planned to stay home for a few years with my kids? Should I have not gone to school at all....?

You are obviously about you and not about the greater good. Your daughter will not benefit from that. Read the studies.

I did. They say all I have to do is work before she's 14. But yea, sorry, I do care more about my happiness and my own family than about your career.

Or your own pride or equality within your family or how your pre-teens perceive you. But that’s awesome. You do you.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know why WOHMs hate on SAHM so much but I will tell you it happens in real life and on DCUM. I’ve been at the receiving end of many comments as an SAHM. Including just yesterday. I wish I had the guts to ask them why they care so much about my family’s choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) it doesn’t affect me on a personal level, but make no mistake it affects me from the level that when they retire, they haven’t paid into the system for however many years. Just coatailling their husband and taking money working people have put into the system through FICA.
Claiming to have “the most important and hardest” job in the world. Sorry babe, once your kids are in elementary school, you are living a life of leisure, stop pretending otherwise.
2) I don’t care other than believing they are lazy and persist on continuing the stereotype of dependence on men versus contributing to equality.

This exactly. I believe that they are bringing all women down by allowing companies to justify the fact that all women quit when they have kids etc. Even worse when they have daughters and push them so hard academically. SAHMs of a daughter at a fancy private school? And they don’t even see the hypocrisy.

Goes double for those who have degrees from fancy institutions that could’ve gone to someone who would actually use them.

So... Even though it makes me happier to stay home with my daughter while she's little, I'm supposed to keep working for the benefit of YOUR career....?
Also, I did use my degree for several years before having children, and I plan to use it again. But I don't agree that a career is the only reason to get a college degree. I'm an educated citizen, which in the end is probably the bigger benefit to society of my education, vs what I'd be doing with my degree in some corporate office. Should I have stopped at a high school degree if I planned to stay home for a few years with my kids? Should I have not gone to school at all....?

Yes. If you want to SAH for a few years with your kids, then you have wasted them. However, if you want to retire early, then you are lauded, even if you went to a fancy school. If you start late as a non-traditional student at a fancy school or professional school, that’s also great. Those years out of the workforce are fine.
So it’s sort of about working and using your degree, but only if you are a woman and dropping out of the workforce for this one specific reason.

[Anonymous]

https://me.me/i/13498140

[Anonymous]

I would care a hell of a lot more if I had daughters. As long as my boys marry working women it’s not my problem.