Can't wait to change my surname, but notice many women keeping theirs, is there a reason for this trend?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do men with double hyphenated last names tend to do when they get married?

Like say Jane Canniff and John Neubauer get married and become Jane Canniff-Neubauer and John Canniff-Naubauer, and they have a son and name him Sebastian Canniff-Neubauer. What does Sebastian do with his last name when he gets married?

Anyone have any anecdotes of men they’ve known in this situation?

Do they add the wife’s last name on? Sebastian Canniff-Naubauer-Smith and Sally Canniff-Naubauer-Smith?

Do they drop one of the last names and add hers on? Canniff-Smith?

Does the wife take the last names of her father in law and mother in law? Sally Canniff-Neubauer?

Just wondering what people have done in this situation.

And the wife could theoretically have a hypenated name too. Caniff Naubauer Smith Weinstein?

She could theoretically call herself Taylor Swift if she felt like it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do men with double hyphenated last names tend to do when they get married?

Like say Jane Canniff and John Neubauer get married and become Jane Canniff-Neubauer and John Canniff-Naubauer, and they have a son and name him Sebastian Canniff-Neubauer. What does Sebastian do with his last name when he gets married?

Anyone have any anecdotes of men they’ve known in this situation?

Do they add the wife’s last name on? Sebastian Canniff-Naubauer-Smith and Sally Canniff-Naubauer-Smith?

Do they drop one of the last names and add hers on? Canniff-Smith?

Does the wife take the last names of her father in law and mother in law? Sally Canniff-Neubauer?

Just wondering what people have done in this situation.

The Spanish have worked this out.

It's true that naming traditions can vary from one country to another, and what works in one place may not be as practical in another. In the United States, it's common for individuals to take their husband's last name upon marriage, and this practice has practical benefits, such as streamlining administrative tasks like taxes, passports, and usernames and emails.

Managing multiple last names can indeed be cumbersome and confusing, and that's one of the reasons many choose to follow the U.S. naming tradition. It's important to recognize that naming practices can differ around the world, and what works best often depends on the specific cultural and administrative context of each country.

How in the world would my passport application, username, and emails be made easier if I had changed my last name to my husbands or he to mine?? Seriously please explain that because I do not recall a single instance of having difficulty in any of these situations.

Married 30 years, never has it been cumbersome or confusing to have different last names. And our kids have gone to multiple schools, had numerous doctors including specialists, and we have traveled often and internationally.

Sorry to disappoint you and spoil your narrative which seems rooted in maybe the early 1900’s?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do men with double hyphenated last names tend to do when they get married?

Like say Jane Canniff and John Neubauer get married and become Jane Canniff-Neubauer and John Canniff-Naubauer, and they have a son and name him Sebastian Canniff-Neubauer. What does Sebastian do with his last name when he gets married?

Anyone have any anecdotes of men they’ve known in this situation?

Do they add the wife’s last name on? Sebastian Canniff-Naubauer-Smith and Sally Canniff-Naubauer-Smith?

Do they drop one of the last names and add hers on? Canniff-Smith?

Does the wife take the last names of her father in law and mother in law? Sally Canniff-Neubauer?

Just wondering what people have done in this situation.

And the wife could theoretically have a hypenated name too. Caniff Naubauer Smith Weinstein?

Wow your concern for other people’s names is truly remarkable.

[Anonymous]

Wow dcum so lib and out our touch with most of women taking the last name, beware of this forum make sure to do research in other places

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow dcum so lib and out our touch with most of women taking the last name, beware of this forum make sure to do research in other places

Too funny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do men with double hyphenated last names tend to do when they get married?

Like say Jane Canniff and John Neubauer get married and become Jane Canniff-Neubauer and John Canniff-Naubauer, and they have a son and name him Sebastian Canniff-Neubauer. What does Sebastian do with his last name when he gets married?

Anyone have any anecdotes of men they’ve known in this situation?

Do they add the wife’s last name on? Sebastian Canniff-Naubauer-Smith and Sally Canniff-Naubauer-Smith?

Do they drop one of the last names and add hers on? Canniff-Smith?

Does the wife take the last names of her father in law and mother in law? Sally Canniff-Neubauer?

Just wondering what people have done in this situation.

The Spanish have worked this out.

It's true that naming traditions can vary from one country to another, and what works in one place may not be as practical in another. In the United States, it's common for individuals to take their husband's last name upon marriage, and this practice has practical benefits, such as streamlining administrative tasks like taxes, passports, and usernames and emails.

Managing multiple last names can indeed be cumbersome and confusing, and that's one of the reasons many choose to follow the U.S. naming tradition. It's important to recognize that naming practices can differ around the world, and what works best often depends on the specific cultural and administrative context of each country.

How in the world would my passport application, username, and emails be made easier if I had changed my last name to my husbands or he to mine?? Seriously please explain that because I do not recall a single instance of having difficulty in any of these situations.

Married 30 years, never has it been cumbersome or confusing to have different last names. And our kids have gone to multiple schools, had numerous doctors including specialists, and we have traveled often and internationally.

Sorry to disappoint you and spoil your narrative which seems rooted in maybe the early 1900’s?

Right? Having a different last name than my husband has caused zero problems for me ever. I'm American-born, and it never occurred to me that I wanted to change my name.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been reading through this forum and have noticed a concerning trend of negative attitudes towards American cultural norms, like the tradition of taking a husband's last name, which is embraced by approximately 85% of women in the U.S. This practice is more than just a tradition; it's an integral part of our social and family structure.

Your participation in these discussions, marked by a dismissive stance towards American customs, is troubling. It's crucial to understand that expressing such negativity, especially in public forums, can have serious implications for your integration into American society. This attitude and visible disdain towards the U.S. could also adversely affect your visa status and the process of obtaining a green card.

While it's important to maintain your personal identity and beliefs, showing respect for the customs of your host country is essential when living in a new community. Publicly insulting these traditions can be seen in a negative light, possibly impacting your efforts to adapt to life in the U.S.

I encourage you to reconsider your approach and engage with cultural differences respectfully. Your experiences and viewpoints are important, but so is demonstrating a willingness to understand and integrate into the cultural context of your new home.

LOL

I did not change my name and my family has been here for centuries. It hasn’t been a problem. Ever.

Omg the person who is "reminding us" is so offensive
I travel at least 2x year internationally with my 3 kids who gasp have a different last name and who are now teens and have never had an issue

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow dcum so lib and out our touch with most of women taking the last name, beware of this forum make sure to do research in other places

The DC/VA/MD area has the most highly educated population in the country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do men with double hyphenated last names tend to do when they get married?

Like say Jane Canniff and John Neubauer get married and become Jane Canniff-Neubauer and John Canniff-Naubauer, and they have a son and name him Sebastian Canniff-Neubauer. What does Sebastian do with his last name when he gets married?

Anyone have any anecdotes of men they’ve known in this situation?

Do they add the wife’s last name on? Sebastian Canniff-Naubauer-Smith and Sally Canniff-Naubauer-Smith?

Do they drop one of the last names and add hers on? Canniff-Smith?

Does the wife take the last names of her father in law and mother in law? Sally Canniff-Neubauer?

Just wondering what people have done in this situation.

The Spanish have worked this out.

It's true that naming traditions can vary from one country to another, and what works in one place may not be as practical in another. In the United States, it's common for individuals to take their husband's last name upon marriage, and this practice has practical benefits, such as streamlining administrative tasks like taxes, passports, and usernames and emails.

Managing multiple last names can indeed be cumbersome and confusing, and that's one of the reasons many choose to follow the U.S. naming tradition. It's important to recognize that naming practices can differ around the world, and what works best often depends on the specific cultural and administrative context of each country.

How in the world would my passport application, username, and emails be made easier if I had changed my last name to my husbands or he to mine?? Seriously please explain that because I do not recall a single instance of having difficulty in any of these situations.

Married 30 years, never has it been cumbersome or confusing to have different last names. And our kids have gone to multiple schools, had numerous doctors including specialists, and we have traveled often and internationally.

Sorry to disappoint you and spoil your narrative which seems rooted in maybe the early 1900’s?

Right? Having a different last name than my husband has caused zero problems for me ever. I'm American-born, and it never occurred to me that I wanted to change my name.

Fantastic for both of you. I chose to change my name and it has caused me zero problems in my professional life, while traveling, etc. The paperwork was extremely easy, too.

Wouldn’t it be great if women could actually support other women’s decisions instead of trying to one-up each other? Isn’t that the goal here? That we can do what we WANT to do and what feels right for US?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow dcum so lib and out our touch with most of women taking the last name, beware of this forum make sure to do research in other places

The DC/VA/MD area has the most highly educated population in the country.

And the most judgmental and insecure, it seems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been reading through this forum and have noticed a concerning trend of negative attitudes towards American cultural norms, like the tradition of taking a husband's last name, which is embraced by approximately 85% of women in the U.S. This practice is more than just a tradition; it's an integral part of our social and family structure.

Your participation in these discussions, marked by a dismissive stance towards American customs, is troubling. It's crucial to understand that expressing such negativity, especially in public forums, can have serious implications for your integration into American society. This attitude and visible disdain towards the U.S. could also adversely affect your visa status and the process of obtaining a green card.

While it's important to maintain your personal identity and beliefs, showing respect for the customs of your host country is essential when living in a new community. Publicly insulting these traditions can be seen in a negative light, possibly impacting your efforts to adapt to life in the U.S.

I encourage you to reconsider your approach and engage with cultural differences respectfully. Your experiences and viewpoints are important, but so is demonstrating a willingness to understand and integrate into the cultural context of your new home.

I am a birthright United States citizen and your thinly veiled Trumpist threats about my “green card” don’t scare me. They are also an embarrassment to the idea of America as a nation of laws. Get bent.

I understand the need for a respectful and constructive discussion, and I appreciate your perspective on this matter. It's essential to maintain a respectful tone and avoid political attacks, as this conversation is about cultural practices and traditions.

However, there seems to be some confusion in your previous posts. You mentioned "in your country" when discussing naming traditions, which led to the assumption that you might have had experiences in another country. If you are a birthright United States citizen, that's perfectly fine, and there's no need to present different perspectives.

Let's focus on the cultural aspects and traditions we are discussing without delving into political discussions or attacks. It's important to engage in open and respectful dialogue to better understand each other's viewpoints and foster a productive conversation. Additionally, please refrain from bringing up political references as they are not relevant to this conversation.

ChatGPT is confused about how many people it is in conversation with and about what constitutes “politics.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been reading through this forum and have noticed a concerning trend of negative attitudes towards American cultural norms, like the tradition of taking a husband's last name, which is embraced by approximately 85% of women in the U.S. This practice is more than just a tradition; it's an integral part of our social and family structure.

Your participation in these discussions, marked by a dismissive stance towards American customs, is troubling. It's crucial to understand that expressing such negativity, especially in public forums, can have serious implications for your integration into American society. This attitude and visible disdain towards the U.S. could also adversely affect your visa status and the process of obtaining a green card.

While it's important to maintain your personal identity and beliefs, showing respect for the customs of your host country is essential when living in a new community. Publicly insulting these traditions can be seen in a negative light, possibly impacting your efforts to adapt to life in the U.S.

I encourage you to reconsider your approach and engage with cultural differences respectfully. Your experiences and viewpoints are important, but so is demonstrating a willingness to understand and integrate into the cultural context of your new home.

I am a birthright United States citizen and your thinly veiled Trumpist threats about my “green card” don’t scare me. They are also an embarrassment to the idea of America as a nation of laws. Get bent.

I understand the need for a respectful and constructive discussion, and I appreciate your perspective on this matter. It's essential to maintain a respectful tone and avoid political attacks, as this conversation is about cultural practices and traditions.

However, there seems to be some confusion in your previous posts. You mentioned "in your country" when discussing naming traditions, which led to the assumption that you might have had experiences in another country. If you are a birthright United States citizen, that's perfectly fine, and there's no need to present different perspectives.

Let's focus on the cultural aspects and traditions we are discussing without delving into political discussions or attacks. It's important to engage in open and respectful dialogue to better understand each other's viewpoints and foster a productive conversation. Additionally, please refrain from bringing up political references as they are not relevant to this conversation.

Dude, stop using ChatGpt please! You were the one “threatening” green card and visa status for US critics. Go away weirdo

Let's make things clear: I'm not ChatGPT, but I'm here to provide information and facilitate a respectful discussion. Please, let's refrain from introducing personal bias and liberal views into the conversation. It's important to approach this topic with an open and balanced perspective. The 85% statistic represents a widely observed cultural practice in the United States, and our aim is to discuss it objectively and respectfully.

No, this is not “our” aim.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do men with double hyphenated last names tend to do when they get married?

Like say Jane Canniff and John Neubauer get married and become Jane Canniff-Neubauer and John Canniff-Naubauer, and they have a son and name him Sebastian Canniff-Neubauer. What does Sebastian do with his last name when he gets married?

Anyone have any anecdotes of men they’ve known in this situation?

Do they add the wife’s last name on? Sebastian Canniff-Naubauer-Smith and Sally Canniff-Naubauer-Smith?

Do they drop one of the last names and add hers on? Canniff-Smith?

Does the wife take the last names of her father in law and mother in law? Sally Canniff-Neubauer?

Just wondering what people have done in this situation.

The Spanish have worked this out.

It's true that naming traditions can vary from one country to another, and what works in one place may not be as practical in another. In the United States, it's common for individuals to take their husband's last name upon marriage, and this practice has practical benefits, such as streamlining administrative tasks like taxes, passports, and usernames and emails.

Managing multiple last names can indeed be cumbersome and confusing, and that's one of the reasons many choose to follow the U.S. naming tradition. It's important to recognize that naming practices can differ around the world, and what works best often depends on the specific cultural and administrative context of each country.

How in the world would my passport application, username, and emails be made easier if I had changed my last name to my husbands or he to mine?? Seriously please explain that because I do not recall a single instance of having difficulty in any of these situations.

Married 30 years, never has it been cumbersome or confusing to have different last names. And our kids have gone to multiple schools, had numerous doctors including specialists, and we have traveled often and internationally.

Sorry to disappoint you and spoil your narrative which seems rooted in maybe the early 1900’s?

Right? Having a different last name than my husband has caused zero problems for me ever. I'm American-born, and it never occurred to me that I wanted to change my name.

Fantastic for both of you. I chose to change my name and it has caused me zero problems in my professional life, while traveling, etc. The paperwork was extremely easy, too.

Wouldn’t it be great if women could actually support other women’s decisions instead of trying to one-up each other? Isn’t that the goal here? That we can do what we WANT to do and what feels right for US?[/quote]

That’s not what OP asked us to discuss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do men with double hyphenated last names tend to do when they get married?

Like say Jane Canniff and John Neubauer get married and become Jane Canniff-Neubauer and John Canniff-Naubauer, and they have a son and name him Sebastian Canniff-Neubauer. What does Sebastian do with his last name when he gets married?

Anyone have any anecdotes of men they’ve known in this situation?

Do they add the wife’s last name on? Sebastian Canniff-Naubauer-Smith and Sally Canniff-Naubauer-Smith?

Do they drop one of the last names and add hers on? Canniff-Smith?

Does the wife take the last names of her father in law and mother in law? Sally Canniff-Neubauer?

Just wondering what people have done in this situation.

The Spanish have worked this out.

It's true that naming traditions can vary from one country to another, and what works in one place may not be as practical in another. In the United States, it's common for individuals to take their husband's last name upon marriage, and this practice has practical benefits, such as streamlining administrative tasks like taxes, passports, and usernames and emails.

Managing multiple last names can indeed be cumbersome and confusing, and that's one of the reasons many choose to follow the U.S. naming tradition. It's important to recognize that naming practices can differ around the world, and what works best often depends on the specific cultural and administrative context of each country.

How in the world would my passport application, username, and emails be made easier if I had changed my last name to my husbands or he to mine?? Seriously please explain that because I do not recall a single instance of having difficulty in any of these situations.

Married 30 years, never has it been cumbersome or confusing to have different last names. And our kids have gone to multiple schools, had numerous doctors including specialists, and we have traveled often and internationally.

Sorry to disappoint you and spoil your narrative which seems rooted in maybe the early 1900’s?

Right? Having a different last name than my husband has caused zero problems for me ever. I'm American-born, and it never occurred to me that I wanted to change my name.

Fantastic for both of you. I chose to change my name and it has caused me zero problems in my professional life, while traveling, etc. The paperwork was extremely easy, too.

Wouldn’t it be great if women could actually support other women’s decisions instead of trying to one-up each other? Isn’t that the goal here? That we can do what we WANT to do and what feels right for US?[/quote]

That’s not what OP asked us to discuss.

+1. OP said she can’t wait to change her name and does not understand why women would not want to do that.

Because if you don’t like your name, you can change it at anytime and you don’t have to wait to get married. Taking your husband’s name puts you in an inferior role. You are not his property and don’t belong to him.

If you want your family to have the same last name, pick a different one entirely for everyone. Do not take your husband’s!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow dcum so lib and out our touch with most of women taking the last name, beware of this forum make sure to do research in other places

Like in your trailer park?