Did a 180 and decided to redshirt my child- question for parents who decided to do the same

[Anonymous]

I am a HS teacher with nearly 20 years of experience, and when I see boys with problems, 95% of them are the oldest ones, not the youngest ones. The youngest ones, or at least the ones that seem most physically immature, may struggle socially, but they do not disrupt the class or engage in behavior that is borderline delinquent. For me, I rather have a younger boy in HS than an older one.

While I appreciate the work that ES school teachers do, they do not see what happens to these children at 14-19. Very different story.

[Anonymous]

We held our late July b-day son back from kindergarten and it was one of the best decisions we've ever made. He is now 16, in high school, and doing great. Isn't it nice that we can all make these very personal decisions for ourselves and our own children.

[Anonymous]

It makes me sad that I'm already worrying about what to do with my toddler son that will turn 5 in July.

FWIW, a friend that is a first grade teacher has said she would recommend holding back boys with summer birthdays and that for the most part her coworkers agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a HS teacher with nearly 20 years of experience, and when I see boys with problems, 95% of them are the oldest ones, not the youngest ones. The youngest ones, or at least the ones that seem most physically immature, may struggle socially, but they do not disrupt the class or engage in behavior that is borderline delinquent. For me, I rather have a younger boy in HS than an older one.

While I appreciate the work that ES school teachers do, they do not see what happens to these children at 14-19. Very different story.

This is a total chicken and egg issue. Many, if not the majority, of those boys were probably held back rather than red shirted, and were held back for delays, issues, etc. that lead to misbehavior later. Redhshirting has only become really popular recently, So this perspective is honestly of limited utility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It makes me sad that I'm already worrying about what to do with my toddler son that will turn 5 in July.

FWIW, a friend that is a first grade teacher has said she would recommend holding back boys with summer birthdays and that for the most part her coworkers agree.

My SIL recommended holding back my September boy almost the day he was born. I agonized over the decision for 4 years and finally decided to send him on time. So far, in K, it's been so-so. I'll find out in another 10 or 15 years whether it was a good idea, I guess, or if we chose wrong.

[Anonymous]

My nephew is an August baby. He was born five weeks early. He's TINY, not even on the growth chart. It's nice to have the option to red shirt him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think OP is embarrassed by her decision. And quite frankly I think she should be.

Send your kid to kindergarten with all the other 5 year olds.

Seriously. My kid started K when she was FOUR (turned five in late September).

[Anonymous]

Why is this thread back???

[Anonymous]

Redhshirting has only become really popular recently, So this perspective is honestly of limited utility.

How do you define recently? I know for a fact that this was a done pretty regularly at least as far back as 25 years ago. I have a file folder full of articles from 25-30 years ago about this very topic. The articles were about how to decide if your child was ready for K and first grade and were very supportive of waiting a year for kids who had summer birthdays.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP is embarrassed by her decision. And quite frankly I think she should be.

Send your kid to kindergarten with all the other 5 year olds.

Seriously. My kid started K when she was FOUR (turned five in late September).

Yay?

[Anonymous]

I have a boy with a September birthday. He will turn five right after school starts and he'll do fine.

If summer birthdays were as big a problem as you people think they are, school systems would change the date. This is all paranoia and insecurity. Someone's child has to be youngest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is how it typically plays out IMO:
Red shirted child does really well in school. Childs parents are very proud. Other parents dismiss these accomplishments, roll their eyes and say "well, of course he is in the highest reading group. His mom had 10-12 more months to prep him"

Red shirted child does well in sports. Childs parents are very proud. Other parents dismiss these accomplishments, roll their eyes and say "well of course he's better than all the other kids. He's had almost another year of growing, coordinating and his dad had another 10-12 months of throwing the ball with him every night in the backyard."
It's almost like these kids accomplishments are put in another category and excused because they are so much older they are expected to be better. And yes, everyone knows who these kids are

Wait? You deliberately hold your hold child back so he/she can an unfair advantage over the other kids, yet you expect the parents of those kids to be impressed with your child? I wouldn't expect other parents to be impressed with my child if he accomplished something on his own 2 feet. This proves the point. You're redshirting in order to get pats on the back.

[Anonymous]

Are Asian-Americans on the redshirting bandwagon? I live in Rockville where there is a big Asian-American population. My son has a late August birthday and I'm inclined to send him on time. Just hoping there are SOME people with involved parents sending their summer boys on time so he has some friends!

[Anonymous]

^^^ maybe they can form a little nerd gang for collective protection against these giant bullies everyone is worried about...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are Asian-Americans on the redshirting bandwagon? I live in Rockville where there is a big Asian-American population. My son has a late August birthday and I'm inclined to send him on time. Just hoping there are SOME people with involved parents sending their summer boys on time so he has some friends!

Son is now three. Late August birthday and preemie to boot. Currently there are nothing indicating he is "behind" any of his peers in preschool. Planning on sending him on time. If something comes up between now and then, of course I'll reconsider.

And he'll probably be a natural in the nerd gang. Both his father and I are nerds.