Did a 180 and decided to redshirt my child- question for parents who decided to do the same

[Anonymous]

In my opinion, whenever I see a redshirted child, I assume s/he has learning or social issues. Of course, I would never say that to you but that's what I would think.

Funny. I don't think that at all. I just think the parents were in tune to the child's needs. And, I did not redshirt mine. But, one was April and the other just missed the cut off and was one of the oldest in class--which is, by the way, an advantage.

[Anonymous]

It's a bit of an advantage if they are with their age cohort in general. Kids who are redshirted for vanity reasons will play down to their cohort. In the long run, that is a disservice to the kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a bit of an advantage if they are with their age cohort in general. Kids who are redshirted for vanity reasons will play down to their cohort. In the long run, that is a disservice to the kid.

What does that mean? Most people hold back kids that aren't ready for whatever reason. Not sure what a "vanity" reason would be.

[Anonymous]

It's a bit of an advantage if they are with their age cohort in general. Kids who are redshirted for vanity reasons will play down to their cohort. In the long run, that is a disservice to the kid.




What does that mean? Most people hold back kids that aren't ready for whatever reason. Not sure what a "vanity" reason would be.

Agree. I think the strong anti-redshirt people on here are those with young kids who might benefit. They are not confident with their decision to send their kids. I am not speaking as one who redshirted my kid. I do agree somewhat with those who object to redshirting Spring birthdays--although my DS might have benefited from it, I felt that was too much of a stretch. But, those with summer birthdays, I have no problem. It depends on the kid!

Believe me, as a former K-1 teacher, there are kids who mature later than others--and it does not have anything to do with intelligence. I have a friend who intends to put her Nov kid in first next year at 5. I think it is a huge mistake--although, academically, he appears ready. Behavior--not so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

It's a bit of an advantage if they are with their age cohort in general. Kids who are redshirted for vanity reasons will play down to their cohort. In the long run, that is a disservice to the kid.




What does that mean? Most people hold back kids that aren't ready for whatever reason. Not sure what a "vanity" reason would be.

Agree. I think the strong anti-redshirt people on here are those with young kids who might benefit. They are not confident with their decision to send their kids. I am not speaking as one who redshirted my kid. I do agree somewhat with those who object to redshirting Spring birthdays--although my DS might have benefited from it, I felt that was too much of a stretch. But, those with summer birthdays, I have no problem. It depends on the kid!

Believe me, as a former K-1 teacher, there are kids who mature later than others--and it does not have anything to do with intelligence. I have a friend who intends to put her Nov kid in first next year at 5. I think it is a huge mistake--although, academically, he appears ready. Behavior--not so much.



His behavior wil not improve if he is with kids 1-2 years younger. Being the youngest for some kids is beneficial.

[Anonymous]

His behavior wil not improve if he is with kids 1-2 years younger. Being the youngest for some kids is beneficial.

He is going EARLY--not with his age group. And, no, it is generally not beneficial. I've seen it in action.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Red-shirting was totally the right decision and many years later-not regretting it. To the person who assumed social issues or academic...you are right. DC was socially immature and had wide scatter in skills from very high to very low. DC these days is a very strong student and has friends-still some social issues (on the spectrum), but DC HAS FRIENDS. I see the kids DC's age in the classes above and no way would DC be able to fit in with any of them. My neighbor gave me a really hard time and now years later wishes she had done it with her summer birthday kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Red-shirting was totally the right decision and many years later-not regretting it. To the person who assumed social issues or academic...you are right. DC was socially immature and had wide scatter in skills from very high to very low. DC these days is a very strong student and has friends-still some social issues (on the spectrum), but DC HAS FRIENDS. I see the kids DC's age in the classes above and no way would DC be able to fit in with any of them. My neighbor gave me a really hard time and now years later wishes she had done it with her summer birthday kid.

That has more to do with the personalities of the cohort than the ages of the kids.

[Anonymous]

Why does anyone care what another parent chooses? Do what is best for your child. Use some common sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So your kid will turn 7 in kindergarten? Yeah I wouldn't celebrate his 7th birthday with his kinder friends. My son who just finished 2nd grade is still 7.

My (ontime) son just finished K. At the end of the year, 2 kids turned 7 and two more were turning 7 over the summer. Honestly, I think of those kids as dim. I really do. Nobody's going to say that but they'll think it; forever. Well, until college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait...you're not planning to send your son who turned 5 in May to Kindergarten this fall? Why???

Signed,

A July 27th baby who entered Kindergarten at 5.

Ha, I was also a July 27 baby who went to K at 5! I didn't realize there was anything weird about that. My sister was born in late October and they sent her at 4, as the cutoff then was later (maybe even December??). She wasn't ready and was later held back a year.

Another July 27th baby that started on time. I never felt younger than my peers, and did fine academically and socially.

[Anonymous]

As someone who has close friends who redshirted their July D, I've learned that it can easily backfire. This girl started K right after she turned 6 and excelled in school, especially in reading and writing. Very early on, she earned a reputation as "the smart kid", and was always very proud of herself until 6th grade. One day, she was helping her 6th-grade English teacher prepare for the next day's lesson, and they somehow winded up talking about birthdays, and when her teacher found out she would be turning 13 the following July, she said something along the lines of, "So that's why you're doing so well. Your parents held you back a year. That was smart of them." She then went on to explain how studies showed that older kids usually did better in school. Well, after that, she never thought of herself as smart again. Every time she accomplished something, she said something along the lines of, "I'm supposed to doing better than everybody. I'm older than everybody." She continued to excel throughout middle school and high school, was principal flutist of her all-state honor orchestra for all 4 years of high school, ended up getting into a top conservatory, and now, at 27, plays the flute professionally. But said she found it difficult to feel proud of herself. This is just something to consider for those who plan to redshirt to boost child's self-esteem, as it could very well do the opposite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As someone who has close friends who redshirted their July D, I've learned that it can easily backfire. This girl started K right after she turned 6 and excelled in school, especially in reading and writing. Very early on, she earned a reputation as "the smart kid", and was always very proud of herself until 6th grade. One day, she was helping her 6th-grade English teacher prepare for the next day's lesson, and they somehow winded up talking about birthdays, and when her teacher found out she would be turning 13 the following July, she said something along the lines of, "So that's why you're doing so well. Your parents held you back a year. That was smart of them." She then went on to explain how studies showed that older kids usually did better in school. Well, after that, she never thought of herself as smart again. Every time she accomplished something, she said something along the lines of, "I'm supposed to doing better than everybody. I'm older than everybody." She continued to excel throughout middle school and high school, was principal flutist of her all-state honor orchestra for all 4 years of high school, ended up getting into a top conservatory, and now, at 27, plays the flute professionally. But said she found it difficult to feel proud of herself. This is just something to consider for those who plan to redshirt to boost child's self-esteem, as it could very well do the opposite.

Red shirting causes [the horror] a lifetime sentence of flute-playing. Now I've seen it all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As someone who has close friends who redshirted their July D, I've learned that it can easily backfire. This girl started K right after she turned 6 and excelled in school, especially in reading and writing. Very early on, she earned a reputation as "the smart kid", and was always very proud of herself until 6th grade. One day, she was helping her 6th-grade English teacher prepare for the next day's lesson, and they somehow winded up talking about birthdays, and when her teacher found out she would be turning 13 the following July, she said something along the lines of, "So that's why you're doing so well. Your parents held you back a year. That was smart of them." She then went on to explain how studies showed that older kids usually did better in school. Well, after that, she never thought of herself as smart again. Every time she accomplished something, she said something along the lines of, "I'm supposed to doing better than everybody. I'm older than everybody." She continued to excel throughout middle school and high school, was principal flutist of her all-state honor orchestra for all 4 years of high school, ended up getting into a top conservatory, and now, at 27, plays the flute professionally. But said she found it difficult to feel proud of herself. This is just something to consider for those who plan to redshirt to boost child's self-esteem, as it could very well do the opposite.

Red shirting causes [the horror] a lifetime sentence of flute-playing. Now I've seen it all.

The flute-playing has nothing to do with it. I just added that in to show that she became successful. My main point was that it really hurt her self-esteem when she find out that her accomplishments were merely because of her age, rather than a special personal aspect that she had thought she had.