Upstairs is off-limits to guests

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

Your friends wander in/out of your master bedroom like it's grand central station. My friends know better...

Yup. My home is a fun place not a fortress. There are kids running around and playing adults who come and interact with them. I know that you will need to take a Xanax after reading this.

We have a playroom. A yard. And the kids are supervised. They are not allowed to tear all over the house and go into rooms that are off limits. They still manage to have a good time even with all those crazy rules...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

Your friends wander in/out of your master bedroom like it's grand central station. My friends know better...

Yup. My home is a fun place not a fortress. There are kids running around and playing adults who come and interact with them. I know that you will need to take a Xanax after reading this.

We have a playroom. A yard. And the kids are supervised. They are not allowed to tear all over the house and go into rooms that are off limits. They still manage to have a good time even with all those crazy rules...

Great. That’s your home. Other people have an even better time without all these crazy rules.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

Your friends wander in/out of your master bedroom like it's grand central station. My friends know better...

Yup. My home is a fun place not a fortress. There are kids running around and playing adults who come and interact with them. I know that you will need to take a Xanax after reading this.

We have a playroom. A yard. And the kids are supervised. They are not allowed to tear all over the house and go into rooms that are off limits. They still manage to have a good time even with all those crazy rules...

Great. That’s your home. Other people have an even better time without all these crazy rules.

Because finding a Hostess cupcake smashed into the bedspread in your master bedroom is way more fun. How about finding that one of the little darlings flushed your makeup down the toilet in the master bathroom. Ha! So funny!

Seriously, dp. I've hosted my fair share of play dates and there is pretty much NO upside in allowing kids to run into your office, master bedroom/bath, formal living room, etc. Some rooms really should be off limits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

Your friends wander in/out of your master bedroom like it's grand central station. My friends know better...

Yup. My home is a fun place not a fortress. There are kids running around and playing adults who come and interact with them. I know that you will need to take a Xanax after reading this.

We have a playroom. A yard. And the kids are supervised. They are not allowed to tear all over the house and go into rooms that are off limits. They still manage to have a good time even with all those crazy rules...

Great. That’s your home. Other people have an even better time without all these crazy rules.

Because finding a Hostess cupcake smashed into the bedspread in your master bedroom is way more fun. How about finding that one of the little darlings flushed your makeup down the toilet in the master bathroom. Ha! So funny!

Seriously, dp. I've hosted my fair share of play dates and there is pretty much NO upside in allowing kids to run into your office, master bedroom/bath, formal living room, etc. Some rooms really should be off limits.

And in your house they can be. Other people will manage their homes differently. And most people don’t have home offices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

Your friends wander in/out of your master bedroom like it's grand central station. My friends know better...

Yup. My home is a fun place not a fortress. There are kids running around and playing adults who come and interact with them. I know that you will need to take a Xanax after reading this.

We have a playroom. A yard. And the kids are supervised. They are not allowed to tear all over the house and go into rooms that are off limits. They still manage to have a good time even with all those crazy rules...

Great. That’s your home. Other people have an even better time without all these crazy rules.

Because finding a Hostess cupcake smashed into the bedspread in your master bedroom is way more fun. How about finding that one of the little darlings flushed your makeup down the toilet in the master bathroom. Ha! So funny!

Seriously, dp. I've hosted my fair share of play dates and there is pretty much NO upside in allowing kids to run into your office, master bedroom/bath, formal living room, etc. Some rooms really should be off limits.

Again, befriend a better class of people. The company you keep speaks volumes about you. And your example show that your friends and their children are very poorly behaved.

[Anonymous]

It is common sense to not barge into some one’s bedroom. They might have gotten dressed really quickly and left dirty underwear on the floor. Who knows. It seems pretty obvious that that is just rude!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have no business "entering someone's bedroom" w/o their express permission. Sorry you do not seem to get that. And, no, part of hosting is not all about giving up every bit of privacy that you have. Good grief.

Psst. There’s a newfangled invention called a lock. Use it if you want to keep your bedroom a secret hideaway. Other people like to have their homes used visited by family and friends. My kids and their friends go upstairs all the time. I would much rather have kids playing in my house than attached to a phone in isolation.

Right, after being invited up by my kids (or me), my guests are more than welcome to go upstairs.

No guest/kid guest has ever spent time on their phone at my house. How very odd. You must not be very entertaining, or you must have rude friends.

You must be over the age of 90 if no guest has ever spent time on their phone at your house.

Darling, there's a difference between a quick glance at the phone or a moment to answer an email, and a nonstop Dragonvale binge for a 14-year-old. You were referring to kids on phones, and you know it. Stop trying to backpedal.

Nope-although the fact you think you’re psychic is a bit scary. I was referring to adults who take work calls. Lots of my friends do this. And they don’t even look through my underwear drawer while doing so! You might try finding some employed friends.

I have never had a guest ask to take a work phone call in my master bedroom. I can't imagine myself making a request like that, either. People get work calls all the time - in the check out line, at restaurants, at school pick up, etc....somehow they manage. Goodness how do you get through life.

This may shock you. But some people live in homes without master bedrooms. We lived in a 1 BR apartment for years and if a guest needed to do anything out of sight of others it was in our bedroom. But it seems like some of the pearl clutchers on these threads are McMansion types.

Obviously, context matters. When I was 23, I'm sure I asked to step away for a moment into my host's bedroom a time or two. -np

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

NP. You need to stop thinking that there is only one poster who has the view that there are public and private spaces within a home, and even when you have been invited/are being hosted, you need to ask before entering into a private space.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

Your friends wander in/out of your master bedroom like it's grand central station. My friends know better...

Yup. My home is a fun place not a fortress. There are kids running around and playing adults who come and interact with them. I know that you will need to take a Xanax after reading this.

We have a playroom. A yard. And the kids are supervised. They are not allowed to tear all over the house and go into rooms that are off limits. They still manage to have a good time even with all those crazy rules...

Great. That’s your home. Other people have an even better time without all these crazy rules.

Because finding a Hostess cupcake smashed into the bedspread in your master bedroom is way more fun. How about finding that one of the little darlings flushed your makeup down the toilet in the master bathroom. Ha! So funny!

Seriously, dp. I've hosted my fair share of play dates and there is pretty much NO upside in allowing kids to run into your office, master bedroom/bath, formal living room, etc. Some rooms really should be off limits.

Again, befriend a better class of people. The company you keep speaks volumes about you. And your example show that your friends and their children are very poorly behaved.

+1. Seriously. I don’t make rooms off limits to my kids and their friends, but I do ask that food stays in eating areas (kitchen and dining room.).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

Your friends wander in/out of your master bedroom like it's grand central station. My friends know better...

Yup. My home is a fun place not a fortress. There are kids running around and playing adults who come and interact with them. I know that you will need to take a Xanax after reading this.

We have a playroom. A yard. And the kids are supervised. They are not allowed to tear all over the house and go into rooms that are off limits. They still manage to have a good time even with all those crazy rules...

Great. That’s your home. Other people have an even better time without all these crazy rules.

Because finding a Hostess cupcake smashed into the bedspread in your master bedroom is way more fun. How about finding that one of the little darlings flushed your makeup down the toilet in the master bathroom. Ha! So funny!

Seriously, dp. I've hosted my fair share of play dates and there is pretty much NO upside in allowing kids to run into your office, master bedroom/bath, formal living room, etc. Some rooms really should be off limits.

Again, befriend a better class of people. The company you keep speaks volumes about you. And your example show that your friends and their children are very poorly behaved.

+1. Seriously. I don’t make rooms off limits to my kids and their friends, but I do ask that food stays in eating areas (kitchen and dining room.).

Why on earth should a child guest be allowed to play in your master bedroom/bathroom? That makes pretty much zero sense. And, yes, most parents do not allow that.

Play dates happen in the playroom, the basement, the child's own bedroom and outside. These are very, very basic rules that take a minimal effort to establish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is common sense to not barge into some one’s bedroom. They might have gotten dressed really quickly and left dirty underwear on the floor. Who knows. It seems pretty obvious that that is just rude!

My SO and I like to surreptitiously hook up at our friends homes during dinner parties. You wouldn’t believe the things we’ve seen!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

Your friends wander in/out of your master bedroom like it's grand central station. My friends know better...

Yup. My home is a fun place not a fortress. There are kids running around and playing adults who come and interact with them. I know that you will need to take a Xanax after reading this.

We have a playroom. A yard. And the kids are supervised. They are not allowed to tear all over the house and go into rooms that are off limits. They still manage to have a good time even with all those crazy rules...

Great. That’s your home. Other people have an even better time without all these crazy rules.

Because finding a Hostess cupcake smashed into the bedspread in your master bedroom is way more fun. How about finding that one of the little darlings flushed your makeup down the toilet in the master bathroom. Ha! So funny!

Seriously, dp. I've hosted my fair share of play dates and there is pretty much NO upside in allowing kids to run into your office, master bedroom/bath, formal living room, etc. Some rooms really should be off limits.

Again, befriend a better class of people. The company you keep speaks volumes about you. And your example show that your friends and their children are very poorly behaved.

NP. Anyone who would type "better class of people" is an a**hat. Please shut up.

There is no reason for this many pages on this topic. OP is correct. It is rude to go into obviously non-public rooms like bedrooms or home offices without asking, even if you are family. People who do this are rude. End of discussion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is common sense to not barge into some one’s bedroom. They might have gotten dressed really quickly and left dirty underwear on the floor. Who knows. It seems pretty obvious that that is just rude!

My SO and I like to surreptitiously hook up at our friends homes during dinner parties. You wouldn’t believe the things we’ve seen!

You are gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

Your friends wander in/out of your master bedroom like it's grand central station. My friends know better...

Yup. My home is a fun place not a fortress. There are kids running around and playing adults who come and interact with them. I know that you will need to take a Xanax after reading this.

We have a playroom. A yard. And the kids are supervised. They are not allowed to tear all over the house and go into rooms that are off limits. They still manage to have a good time even with all those crazy rules...

Great. That’s your home. Other people have an even better time without all these crazy rules.

Because finding a Hostess cupcake smashed into the bedspread in your master bedroom is way more fun. How about finding that one of the little darlings flushed your makeup down the toilet in the master bathroom. Ha! So funny!

Seriously, dp. I've hosted my fair share of play dates and there is pretty much NO upside in allowing kids to run into your office, master bedroom/bath, formal living room, etc. Some rooms really should be off limits.

Again, befriend a better class of people. The company you keep speaks volumes about you. And your example show that your friends and their children are very poorly behaved.

NP. Anyone who would type "better class of people" is an a**hat. Please shut up.

There is no reason for this many pages on this topic. OP is correct. It is rude to go into obviously non-public rooms like bedrooms or home offices without asking, even if you are family. People who do this are rude. End of discussion.

+ 1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:22 pages? What are you all talking about?!

One group of posters still live like kids in dorms or share houses, where nothing is private and there are most likely people drinking and making out in every corner of every room.

The other group of posters have homes with entertaining space(s) and then areas of the house that are not entertaining spaces, and they expect guests who are at their house for an event to stay where the event is being held unless they're invited or ask to go elsewhere.

The first group can't understand why the second group isn't comfortable with them just poking around the entire house whenever they feel like it (including going up stairs that they weren't welcomed to go up, or opening doors that they weren't welcomed to open) to satisfy their curiosity.

The second group wonders how to identify the first group so we can not invite them to our events.

+ at least seven: my mom, my five sisters, and I

Exaggerate much? There appears to be a poster on this thread who equates not walling off their upstairs to allowing guests to go through their underwear drawer. The poster needs to find a better class of friends.

Your friends wander in/out of your master bedroom like it's grand central station. My friends know better...

Yup. My home is a fun place not a fortress. There are kids running around and playing adults who come and interact with them. I know that you will need to take a Xanax after reading this.

We have a playroom. A yard. And the kids are supervised. They are not allowed to tear all over the house and go into rooms that are off limits. They still manage to have a good time even with all those crazy rules...

Great. That’s your home. Other people have an even better time without all these crazy rules.

Because finding a Hostess cupcake smashed into the bedspread in your master bedroom is way more fun. How about finding that one of the little darlings flushed your makeup down the toilet in the master bathroom. Ha! So funny!

Seriously, dp. I've hosted my fair share of play dates and there is pretty much NO upside in allowing kids to run into your office, master bedroom/bath, formal living room, etc. Some rooms really should be off limits.

Again, befriend a better class of people. The company you keep speaks volumes about you. And your example show that your friends and their children are very poorly behaved.

+1. Seriously. I don’t make rooms off limits to my kids and their friends, but I do ask that food stays in eating areas (kitchen and dining room.).

Why on earth should a child guest be allowed to play in your master bedroom/bathroom? That makes pretty much zero sense. And, yes, most parents do not allow that.

Play dates happen in the playroom, the basement, the child's own bedroom and outside. These are very, very basic rules that take a minimal effort to establish.

We don't have a playroom or a backyard, basement or a backyard, so yes, our playdates happen all over the house. Enjoy your McMansion!