Shoe, Cars, Purses, and Country Clubs Why Are These Status Symbols So Important?

[Anonymous]

I find the focus on dcurbanmom on these status symbols crazy. Why do you care what brand of shoes I wear and the purse I buy or whether I drive a luxury car or if I belong to a CC? We are middle income based on warped private school standards less than 250k per year but close to it. I could make my kids take put loans for college to buy that luxury car and belong to that CC ( we've saved 200k for college)... or keep a high mortgage balance and buy all of this crap to fit in with the parents. What bugs me the most are the wannabees who have no assets (one paycheck away from not being able to pay their mortgage):but flaunt their non-existant wealth and look down on us.

[Anonymous]

You think I care about your stuff. But I don't. Besides, why do you care? I don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What bugs me the most are the wannabees who have no assets (one paycheck away from not being able to pay their mortgage):but flaunt their non-existant wealth and look down on us.

Well, but it sounds like you look down on them, so it probably comes out even.

[Anonymous]

I don't appreciate people dismissing us because they flaunt more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find the focus on dcurbanmom on these status symbols crazy. Why do you care what brand of shoes I wear and the purse I buy or whether I drive a luxury car or if I belong to a CC? We are middle income based on warped private school standards less than 250k per year but close to it. I could make my kids take put loans for college to buy that luxury car and belong to that CC ( we've saved 200k for college)... or keep a high mortgage balance and buy all of this crap to fit in with the parents. What bugs me the most are the wannabees who have no assets (one paycheck away from not being able to pay their mortgage):but flaunt their non-existant wealth and look down on us.

I'm just responding to the last part. The wannabes drive me nuts too. They have no equity in their house and no assets to speak of but drive fancy cars, wear $300 shoes, and carry $1,000 bags. I think these people are just extremely insecure and feel a need to keep up with the Joneses. I prefer financial stability and security over designer bags and kind of laugh to myself at people who waste money on luxuries they cannot afford - we all know who they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't appreciate people dismissing us because they flaunt more.

I really think it's in your head. How about you get your kid in the best school for the kid and then leave it at that? Resist making it about you.

[Anonymous]

I am on DCUM way too much and I don't see a lot of discussion or disagreements about the items you specify in your post. Instead, I see a lot of obsession with politics, schools, child rearing styles and real estate.

If I may say, it seems like your frustrations aren't the result of interactions on DCUM but, rather, real life experiences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't appreciate people dismissing us because they flaunt more.

I really think it's in your head. How about you get your kid in the best school for the kid and then leave it at that? Resist making it about you. Do you have kids? Trust me when the parents look down at your family it impacts the way your kid is treated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't appreciate people dismissing us because they flaunt more.

I really think it's in your head. How about you get your kid in the best school for the kid and then leave it at that? Resist making it about you.

If parents are dismissive to other parents, you don't think the kids pick up on the queues. PLEASE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am on DCUM way too much and I don't see a lot of discussion or disagreements about the items you specify in your post. Instead, I see a lot of obsession with politics, schools, child rearing styles and real estate.

If I may say, it seems like your frustrations aren't the result of interactions on DCUM but, rather, real life experiences.

There a recent thread on "fitting in"where they talk about purses and handbags. No one in real life would come up to me and say I look down on you because you have the wrong handbag, car, and purse...but some people do. Yes, It is a combination of stuff read on dcurbanmom and my real life experiences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't appreciate people dismissing us because they flaunt more.

I really think it's in your head. How about you get your kid in the best school for the kid and then leave it at that? Resist making it about you.

If parents are dismissive to other parents, you don't think the kids pick up on the queues. PLEASE.

I don't think parents are dismissive so no queues for kids in any event. Whatever that means.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't appreciate people dismissing us because they flaunt more.

I really think it's in your head. How about you get your kid in the best school for the kid and then leave it at that? Resist making it about you.

If parents are dismissive to other parents, you don't think the kids pick up on the queues. PLEASE.

Where do you live that other parents at your DCs' school are openly dismissive of you because of your shoes, purse or car? I can't imagine that's actually true.

[Anonymous]

I am so confused.

Here is what I have learned from DCUM:

1. Most rich people are actually not rich, they're middle class.
2. Real rich people don't spend money.
2a. This is good.
2b. Also that way you don't know they're rich.
3. Fake rich people do spend money.
3a. This is bad.
3b. Also that way you're supposed to think they're rich, but you know they're really not, because see 3.
4. Class is not important; what matters is how you treat people.
4a. Unless you're lower class (aka "trailer park" and "trashy"). (For example, your kids drink juice or don't wear rash guards to the pool.)
4b. Or you're a fake rich person (see 3a).

Can somebody please explain?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am so confused.

Here is what I have learned from DCUM:

1. Most rich people are actually not rich, they're middle class.
2. Real rich people don't spend money.
2a. This is good.
2b. Also that way you don't know they're rich.
3. Fake rich people do spend money.
3a. This is bad.
3b. Also that way you're supposed to think they're rich, but you know they're really not, because see 3.
4. Class is not important; what matters is how you treat people.
4a. Unless you're lower class (aka "trailer park" and "trashy"). (For example, your kids drink juice or don't wear rash guards to the pool.)
4b. Or you're a fake rich person (see 3a).

Can somebody please explain?

That about sums it up.

[Anonymous]

This is a problem only at Sidwell as far as I can tell. Maybe GDS too, but never at STA.