Pretending to Not Remember Someone

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. OMG OP you actually think someone who was a middle school girlfriend is still holding a flame for your DH? Thank you. I needed this laugh today.

Well, as a guy who contacted al of his exes after my divorce I can promise you that people do in fact remember who they were once in love or lust with. Even if it was when they were a teenager.

Reaching out to exes after a divorce is very common.

Really? You would contact someone you were in a "relationship" with when you were 12? That's just pathetic.

I was 15 at the end of 8th grade. Lost my virginity that summer. I remember his name, the way he was gentle and everything about it. Occasionally I look him up on FB. I'm 38.

15? Yeesh. Not many people redshirted then. I was 13.

15 does seem really old even for a redshirted kid, but whatever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All of you claiming its normal to forget people in your life might want to get a mental health check up. Sounds like early onset dementia.

Forgetting what you had for lunch is one thing, but forgetting who you dated for 18 months is a HUGE sign something is wrong cognitively.

Make an appt with your DR asap.

+1

Not really, Middle school was 20+ years ago for me, much more significant things have happened in my life than a middle school boyfriend and staying at his house. It's hardly the thing people pretend not to remember. Normal people rent's stuck on middle school at 40.

[Anonymous]

I married my middle school boyfriend! Celebrated 20 years last July!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. OMG OP you actually think someone who was a middle school girlfriend is still holding a flame for your DH? Thank you. I needed this laugh today.

Well, as a guy who contacted al of his exes after my divorce I can promise you that people do in fact remember who they were once in love or lust with. Even if it was when they were a teenager.

Reaching out to exes after a divorce is very common.

Really? You would contact someone you were in a "relationship" with when you were 12? That's just pathetic.

I was 15 at the end of 8th grade. Lost my virginity that summer. I remember his name, the way he was gentle and everything about it. Occasionally I look him up on FB. I'm 38.

NP. All that was oh so sweet until you got to "I look him up on Facebook."

Asking seriously: What purpose does that serve now? To help you recall losing your virginity to this gentle teen boy who is now decades older and (one assumes?) isnt in your life? I
Just don't get people looking up exes from middle or HS years and years later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. OMG OP you actually think someone who was a middle school girlfriend is still holding a flame for your DH? Thank you. I needed this laugh today.

Well, as a guy who contacted al of his exes after my divorce I can promise you that people do in fact remember who they were once in love or lust with. Even if it was when they were a teenager.

Reaching out to exes after a divorce is very common.

Really? You would contact someone you were in a "relationship" with when you were 12? That's just pathetic.

I was 15 at the end of 8th grade. Lost my virginity that summer. I remember his name, the way he was gentle and everything about it. Occasionally I look him up on FB. I'm 38.

15? Yeesh. Not many people redshirted then. I was 13.

Back then it was known as being held back. Depending on how old he was, OP could be guilty of statutory rape.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. OMG OP you actually think someone who was a middle school girlfriend is still holding a flame for your DH? Thank you. I needed this laugh today.

Well, as a guy who contacted al of his exes after my divorce I can promise you that people do in fact remember who they were once in love or lust with. Even if it was when they were a teenager.

Reaching out to exes after a divorce is very common.

Really? You would contact someone you were in a "relationship" with when you were 12? That's just pathetic.

I was 15 at the end of 8th grade. Lost my virginity that summer. I remember his name, the way he was gentle and everything about it. Occasionally I look him up on FB. I'm 38.

NP. All that was oh so sweet until you got to "I look him up on Facebook."

Asking seriously: What purpose does that serve now? To help you recall losing your virginity to this gentle teen boy who is now decades older and (one assumes?) isnt in your life? I
Just don't get people looking up exes from middle or HS years and years later.

To see what he looks like, how he aged, if he's married, a father, a success or failure or any number of other things. Completely natural to be curious about your exes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. OMG OP you actually think someone who was a middle school girlfriend is still holding a flame for your DH? Thank you. I needed this laugh today.

Well, as a guy who contacted al of his exes after my divorce I can promise you that people do in fact remember who they were once in love or lust with. Even if it was when they were a teenager.

Reaching out to exes after a divorce is very common.

Really? You would contact someone you were in a "relationship" with when you were 12? That's just pathetic.

I was 15 at the end of 8th grade. Lost my virginity that summer. I remember his name, the way he was gentle and everything about it. Occasionally I look him up on FB. I'm 38.

15? Yeesh. Not many people redshirted then. I was 13.

Back then it was known as being held back. Depending on how old he was, OP could be guilty of statutory rape.

^ pp

[Anonymous]

What a silly thread.

OP, I suggest some reading on memory, which operates very differently for different people. I have a number of friends with few memories of childhood, and not because they’re victims of childhood trauma - some people form and retain memory very differently than others. You also have no idea what physical or psychological issues this woman might have that could have impacted her memory.

Just the other day I was thinking about my middle school experience and the boy who was my first boyfriend. I had a mad crush on him, and we dated for the better part of a year, went to school dances and to movies together and double dated with my bestie and his bestie. I remember my bestie who is still in my life, but I cannot recall my boyfriend’s name or the name of his best friend. I have a vague recollection of what might be their first names, but certainly don’t knew their full names. No middle school yearbooks to consult either. If I met him again tomorrow or saw him on Facebook I very likely wouldn’t recognize him because many people’s faces change a terrific amount from middle school to middle age. Still in my heart I will always retain fondness for David, or Danny, or Dylan? My first real boyfriend.

The things that stay sharp in our memories are usually the memories we visit over and over and over again - we burn those neural pathways deeper and deeper in our brains, while all the memories we don’t revisit often, or at all, fall away from our easy recollection. It seems very likely that this woman hasn’t thought of your husband in decades, which is why she doesn’t remember his face or his family’s vacation home.

Don’t worry yourself about her.

[Anonymous]

OP here- update.

She messaged the group today and said she's really looking forward to seeing everybody in "Reedeville". That's where my DH's river house is.

The thing is- "Reedeville" was never mentioned in the details. She messed up. If we are to believe her she would have no knowledge of the location.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here- update.

She messaged the group today and said she's really looking forward to seeing everybody in "Reedeville". That's where my DH's river house is.

The thing is- "Reedeville" was never mentioned in the details. She messed up. If we are to believe her she would have no knowledge of the location.

She didn't mess up. You don't know what conversations she's had outside the chat. She is clearly closer to part of the group than others. It is odd that you are making something out of this. On the trip, her memory will probably be refreshed. She is not secretly carrying a torch for her middle school boyfriend. You guys are not rivals. I hope you act normally on the trip.

[Anonymous]

Op you are one strange person

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here- update.

She messaged the group today and said she's really looking forward to seeing everybody in "Reedeville". That's where my DH's river house is.

The thing is- "Reedeville" was never mentioned in the details. She messed up. If we are to believe her she would have no knowledge of the location.

She didn't mess up. You don't know what conversations she's had outside the chat. She is clearly closer to part of the group than others. It is odd that you are making something out of this. On the trip, her memory will probably be refreshed. She is not secretly carrying a torch for her middle school boyfriend. You guys are not rivals. I hope you act normally on the trip.

Wrong. There are only 4 organizers. She spoke with 1. No mention of Reedeville was made. She slipped up. It's OK you don't want to believe that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What a silly thread.

OP, I suggest some reading on memory, which operates very differently for different people. I have a number of friends with few memories of childhood, and not because they’re victims of childhood trauma - some people form and retain memory very differently than others. You also have no idea what physical or psychological issues this woman might have that could have impacted her memory.

Just the other day I was thinking about my middle school experience and the boy who was my first boyfriend. I had a mad crush on him, and we dated for the better part of a year, went to school dances and to movies together and double dated with my bestie and his bestie. I remember my bestie who is still in my life, but I cannot recall my boyfriend’s name or the name of his best friend. I have a vague recollection of what might be their first names, but certainly don’t knew their full names. No middle school yearbooks to consult either. If I met him again tomorrow or saw him on Facebook I very likely wouldn’t recognize him because many people’s faces change a terrific amount from middle school to middle age. Still in my heart I will always retain fondness for David, or Danny, or Dylan? My first real boyfriend.

The things that stay sharp in our memories are usually the memories we visit over and over and over again - we burn those neural pathways deeper and deeper in our brains, while all the memories we don’t revisit often, or at all, fall away from our easy recollection. It seems very likely that this woman hasn’t thought of your husband in decades, which is why she doesn’t remember his face or his family’s vacation home.

Don’t worry yourself about her.

That's interesting. How old are you? I'm 41 and I can tell you everybody from my elementary school classes, including last names, and the names of all of my teachers. I think I must have a very good memory.

[Anonymous]

Op why are you so invested in this? Do you really honestly believe she is still pining over your DH? Your responses here are so so odd.

[Anonymous]

Does your husband know about this post?