Pretending to Not Remember Someone

[Anonymous]

My DH is still very close with his childhood friends. There's a group of about 40 that all grew up in the same neighborhood and attended the same schools K-12. We are now in our early 40s and, pre pandemic, they'd get together all the time. One girl (call her Erin) moved away in 9th grade but she had been my DH's middle school gf of about 1.5 years.

Last night she feigned to not know him. On Facebook they are organizing a possible reunion this summer and my DH offered up his family's house on the Northern Neck as the venue. This girl (who has even been there) claimed not to know my husband or about his family's river house.

She's recently divorced and moved back to DC from several years in LA

Am I crazy to think she's still carrying a flame for my husband?

[Anonymous]

Yes. That would be crazy to assume.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know but I would make sure you are at that reunion

[Anonymous]

LOL. OMG OP you actually think someone who was a middle school girlfriend is still holding a flame for your DH? Thank you. I needed this laugh today.

[Anonymous]

Maybe it’s your DH who still carries a flame for her. He seems to remember this long lost love as something big, but she doesn’t even remember him at all. He seems way more invested than she does.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH is still very close with his childhood friends. There's a group of about 40 that all grew up in the same neighborhood and attended the same schools K-12. We are now in our early 40s and, pre pandemic, they'd get together all the time. One girl (call her Erin) moved away in 9th grade but she had been my DH's middle school gf of about 1.5 years.

Last night she feigned to not know him. On Facebook they are organizing a possible reunion this summer and my DH offered up his family's house on the Northern Neck as the venue. This girl (who has even been there) claimed not to know my husband or about his family's river house.

She's recently divorced and moved back to DC from several years in LA

Am I crazy to think she's still carrying a flame for my husband?

First of all, if she is in her early 40's she is not a girl and second you are crazy. If she had a flame for your dh than wouldn't she remember him? Most likely she couldn't stand him..lol

[Anonymous]

I don't remember too much from middle school period. She obviously doesn't remember, nor was it important to her OP. I guess she moved on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL. OMG OP you actually think someone who was a middle school girlfriend is still holding a flame for your DH? Thank you. I needed this laugh today.

Well, as a guy who contacted al of his exes after my divorce I can promise you that people do in fact remember who they were once in love or lust with. Even if it was when they were a teenager.

Reaching out to exes after a divorce is very common.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. OMG OP you actually think someone who was a middle school girlfriend is still holding a flame for your DH? Thank you. I needed this laugh today.

Well, as a guy who contacted al of his exes after my divorce I can promise you that people do in fact remember who they were once in love or lust with. Even if it was when they were a teenager.

Reaching out to exes after a divorce is very common.

Really? You would contact someone you were in a "relationship" with when you were 12? That's just pathetic.

[Anonymous]

“This girl (who has even been there) claimed not to know my husband or about his family's river house. ”

She had a trauma and blocked it out.

A friend was raped by our classmates’ dad on an overnight trip when we were in HS. She has zero memory of the event or the entire trip. The dad caught caught years later because he raped other girls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't remember too much from middle school period. She obviously doesn't remember, nor was it important to her OP. I guess she moved on.

Read the title. She's pretending to not remember. People do that all the time. It's a power play.

OP- yes, she probably still likes your DH but I doubt she's going after him. She's just embarrassed she still cares.

[Anonymous]

OP- she has her reasons. Are you worried DH may cheat on you? She may pretend to forget because she doesn't really want to see everyone again....
let her be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. OMG OP you actually think someone who was a middle school girlfriend is still holding a flame for your DH? Thank you. I needed this laugh today.

Well, as a guy who contacted al of his exes after my divorce I can promise you that people do in fact remember who they were once in love or lust with. Even if it was when they were a teenager.

Reaching out to exes after a divorce is very common.

Really? You would contact someone you were in a "relationship" with when you were 12? That's just pathetic.

I was 15 at the end of 8th grade. Lost my virginity that summer. I remember his name, the way he was gentle and everything about it. Occasionally I look him up on FB. I'm 38.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't remember too much from middle school period. She obviously doesn't remember, nor was it important to her OP. I guess she moved on.

Read the title. She's pretending to not remember. People do that all the time. It's a power play.

OP- yes, she probably still likes your DH but I doubt she's going after him. She's just embarrassed she still cares.

How does OP know if someone she never met really forgot or pretends to forget? She can’t even hear tone of voice because it’s written.

OP doesn’t like the idea that her DH is forgettable, or that he remembers this woman fondly while she forgot him. The logical conclusion to make her DH look better under those conditions is to say the childhood ex is pretending because she’s still hung up on him, because that’s how amazing he he’s, which means OP is the winner because she’s with him now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. OMG OP you actually think someone who was a middle school girlfriend is still holding a flame for your DH? Thank you. I needed this laugh today.

Well, as a guy who contacted al of his exes after my divorce I can promise you that people do in fact remember who they were once in love or lust with. Even if it was when they were a teenager.

Reaching out to exes after a divorce is very common.

She didn’t do that. They’re in a fb group for the class, and OP’s DH is the one bring up the past to her. She’s not reaching out at all, she’s saying, sorry, don’t remember going to your house one time 25 years ago. And OP thinks that’s some sign that she’s still in love with him.