Boy poked DD9 in the chest

[Anonymous]

I’d tell her to slap/hit him the next time he does if, ideally when the teacher is not looking. He is likely old enough to be really embarrassed by a girl smacking him and probably won’t tattle. Even if he does- whatever. She’s 9, there wont be any actual lasting consequences anyway (and teacher and admin are likely to be sympathetic to her, and he will probably get punished as well). Either way he will stop bothering her, so problem solved. Sorry, minor violence IS the answer sometimes. 🤣

[Anonymous]

Can she and a couple of others girls band together on this so each is less vulnerable l? Safety in numbers. Be in line together and keep close watch on him, arms crossed and glare if he comes near etc. he will probably back off

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d tell her to slap/hit him the next time he does if, ideally when the teacher is not looking. He is likely old enough to be really embarrassed by a girl smacking him and probably won’t tattle. Even if he does- whatever. She’s 9, there wont be any actual lasting consequences anyway (and teacher and admin are likely to be sympathetic to her, and he will probably get punished as well). Either way he will stop bothering her, so problem solved. Sorry, minor violence IS the answer sometimes. 🤣

So crazy to me that this is seen as fine advice to give a girl, but if a boy retaliates the whole internet says hes a menace, unfixable, males are ruining schools, etc. Why does the girl get to sneakily attack someone and that is a good thing?

I'm not in support of the boy poking her, but also not in support of girls being empowered to hurt others either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d tell her to slap/hit him the next time he does if, ideally when the teacher is not looking. He is likely old enough to be really embarrassed by a girl smacking him and probably won’t tattle. Even if he does- whatever. She’s 9, there wont be any actual lasting consequences anyway (and teacher and admin are likely to be sympathetic to her, and he will probably get punished as well). Either way he will stop bothering her, so problem solved. Sorry, minor violence IS the answer sometimes. 🤣

So crazy to me that this is seen as fine advice to give a girl, but if a boy retaliates the whole internet says hes a menace, unfixable, males are ruining schools, etc. Why does the girl get to sneakily attack someone and that is a good thing?

I'm not in support of the boy poking her, but also not in support of girls being empowered to hurt others either.

I’d tell a boy to do the same thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d tell her to slap/hit him the next time he does if, ideally when the teacher is not looking. He is likely old enough to be really embarrassed by a girl smacking him and probably won’t tattle. Even if he does- whatever. She’s 9, there wont be any actual lasting consequences anyway (and teacher and admin are likely to be sympathetic to her, and he will probably get punished as well). Either way he will stop bothering her, so problem solved. Sorry, minor violence IS the answer sometimes. 🤣

So crazy to me that this is seen as fine advice to give a girl, but if a boy retaliates the whole internet says hes a menace, unfixable, males are ruining schools, etc. Why does the girl get to sneakily attack someone and that is a good thing?

I'm not in support of the boy poking her, but also not in support of girls being empowered to hurt others either.

She's not being empowered to hurt others. She's being empowered to defend herself. But I think slapping is the wrong move, I agree with loudly telling him to stop and/or kneeing him in the crotch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d tell her to slap/hit him the next time he does if, ideally when the teacher is not looking. He is likely old enough to be really embarrassed by a girl smacking him and probably won’t tattle. Even if he does- whatever. She’s 9, there wont be any actual lasting consequences anyway (and teacher and admin are likely to be sympathetic to her, and he will probably get punished as well). Either way he will stop bothering her, so problem solved. Sorry, minor violence IS the answer sometimes. 🤣

So crazy to me that this is seen as fine advice to give a girl, but if a boy retaliates the whole internet says hes a menace, unfixable, males are ruining schools, etc. Why does the girl get to sneakily attack someone and that is a good thing?

I'm not in support of the boy poking her, but also not in support of girls being empowered to hurt others either.

She's not being empowered to hurt others. She's being empowered to defend herself. But I think slapping is the wrong move, I agree with loudly telling him to stop and/or kneeing him in the crotch.

Or a swift kick in the shin

[Anonymous]

I’d teach your kid to stop being a p****. She can either tell the teacher, scream, or whack him. Whining to you is a p**** move. Do better

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think saying loudly "stop touching me" and then moving to another spot in line, even if its the back is the best advice.

Im not convinced from this telling that it is sexual in nature at all, but still annoying and inappropriate to poke anyone.

What a ridiculous lesson to teach a little girl. But coming from somone trying to pretend that a boy repeatedly poking girls in the nipple has nothing to do with sex it makes a twisted kind of sense. He wasn't doing anything *really* wrong, and anyway if he was she should be punished for it. #boymom, amirite?

I would never advise a grown woman to engage physically with a creepy man if she instead has the option to disengage. If Im sitting on the metro and a dude is creeping me out I will get up and move to another train. That's not cowardice, its common sense. Trying to kick every guy in the balls that bothers you is awful advice for a young girl to hear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think saying loudly "stop touching me" and then moving to another spot in line, even if its the back is the best advice.

Im not convinced from this telling that it is sexual in nature at all, but still annoying and inappropriate to poke anyone.

What a ridiculous lesson to teach a little girl. But coming from somone trying to pretend that a boy repeatedly poking girls in the nipple has nothing to do with sex it makes a twisted kind of sense. He wasn't doing anything *really* wrong, and anyway if he was she should be punished for it. #boymom, amirite?

I would never advise a grown woman to engage physically with a creepy man if she instead has the option to disengage. If Im sitting on the metro and a dude is creeping me out I will get up and move to another train. That's not cowardice, its common sense. Trying to kick every guy in the balls that bothers you is awful advice for a young girl to hear.

Little boys and grown men (who could physically overpower you or may even be carrying a weapon) are not at all the same thing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think saying loudly "stop touching me" and then moving to another spot in line, even if its the back is the best advice.

Im not convinced from this telling that it is sexual in nature at all, but still annoying and inappropriate to poke anyone.

What a ridiculous lesson to teach a little girl. But coming from somone trying to pretend that a boy repeatedly poking girls in the nipple has nothing to do with sex it makes a twisted kind of sense. He wasn't doing anything *really* wrong, and anyway if he was she should be punished for it. #boymom, amirite?

I would never advise a grown woman to engage physically with a creepy man if she instead has the option to disengage. If Im sitting on the metro and a dude is creeping me out I will get up and move to another train. That's not cowardice, its common sense. Trying to kick every guy in the balls that bothers you is awful advice for a young girl to hear.

How do you reconcile "he was just poking her there was nothing sexual in the interaction" with "this is a lesson about creepy men"? Or do you not even try to reconcile the sexist double binds in your mind, just blame women and girls in every situation and believe you're practicing benevolence?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think saying loudly "stop touching me" and then moving to another spot in line, even if its the back is the best advice.

Im not convinced from this telling that it is sexual in nature at all, but still annoying and inappropriate to poke anyone.

What a ridiculous lesson to teach a little girl. But coming from somone trying to pretend that a boy repeatedly poking girls in the nipple has nothing to do with sex it makes a twisted kind of sense. He wasn't doing anything *really* wrong, and anyway if he was she should be punished for it. #boymom, amirite?

I would never advise a grown woman to engage physically with a creepy man if she instead has the option to disengage. If Im sitting on the metro and a dude is creeping me out I will get up and move to another train. That's not cowardice, its common sense. Trying to kick every guy in the balls that bothers you is awful advice for a young girl to hear.

How do you reconcile "he was just poking her there was nothing sexual in the interaction" with "this is a lesson about creepy men"? Or do you not even try to reconcile the sexist double binds in your mind, just blame women and girls in every situation and believe you're practicing benevolence?

Because as someone up thread said, a 9 year old is not the same as a grown man. At that age "creepy" means annoying. But in either instance I would advise girls to leave instead of attack.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think saying loudly "stop touching me" and then moving to another spot in line, even if its the back is the best advice.

Im not convinced from this telling that it is sexual in nature at all, but still annoying and inappropriate to poke anyone.

What a ridiculous lesson to teach a little girl. But coming from somone trying to pretend that a boy repeatedly poking girls in the nipple has nothing to do with sex it makes a twisted kind of sense. He wasn't doing anything *really* wrong, and anyway if he was she should be punished for it. #boymom, amirite?

I would never advise a grown woman to engage physically with a creepy man if she instead has the option to disengage. If Im sitting on the metro and a dude is creeping me out I will get up and move to another train. That's not cowardice, its common sense. Trying to kick every guy in the balls that bothers you is awful advice for a young girl to hear.

How do you reconcile "he was just poking her there was nothing sexual in the interaction" with "this is a lesson about creepy men"? Or do you not even try to reconcile the sexist double binds in your mind, just blame women and girls in every situation and believe you're practicing benevolence?

Because as someone up thread said, a 9 year old is not the same as a grown man. At that age "creepy" means annoying. But in either instance I would advise girls to leave instead of attack.

"Because my analogy makes no sense, and I'm fine with it!" Neat?

[Anonymous]

Op here. Apparently the principal and their teacher pulled him out of specials according to my daughter, so I’m assuming that’s when they addressed it with him though he sounds like a little sh*t so maybe it was for something else.

[Anonymous]

My DD is very vocal and honestly confrontational. If yelling, being stern, hitting his hand away, etc. doesn’t work I think my DH and the other fathers we are friends with would rotate through lunch for a week watching the class. I know this sounds like a joke but they all have daughters and don’t play around with behavior like this.

[Anonymous]

Teach her to throw a punch and give her permission to do it if she's molested.