What’s the best joke you’ve ever heard?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where does the cowboy take his trash?
To the dump, to the dump, to the dump dump dump

???????

When you say the punchline in your head, try singing it to the tune of the Lone Ranger theme song.

AKA the William Tell Overture

Is this a super old people thing? Boomers? I'm 40 and have zero idea what either of these are.

It's unusual for you not to know William Tell Overture or The Lone Ranger. Did you not grow up in the US? Or maybe you didn't watch TV growing up? I'm 45, so it's not like I was watching the Lone Ranger in it's prime. But it's a widely known and used pop culture reference. And the song is in countless cartoons. My 7yo recognizes it, so it's not a generational thing.

I'm the AKA PP. I agree that it is unusual that you don't know either of those references. No, it's not just a super old thing.

The William Tell Overture is one of the most well known pieces of classical music and has been used for many media productions (of various media forms), the Lone Ranger being one of the most well known. But The William Tell Overture is played for many 4th of July fireworks festivals and is frequently used as an underscore to shows, comedies and cartoons. If you listen to it, I'm betting you'll recognize it and realize that you knew it, but just didn't know the name.

[Anonymous]

A professor of ancient Greek goes to a tailor to get his trousers mended.


The tailor asks: “Euripides?” The professor replies: “Yes. Eumenides?”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 13 yo texted me this one the other day.

What did one milk say to the other milk?
What’s up dood.

Great ABCD joke.
Doodh is milk in Hindi.

[Anonymous]

Q. What is the difference between a hoover and a harley?


A. Location of the dirtbag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A professor of ancient Greek goes to a tailor to get his trousers mended.


The tailor asks: “Euripides?” The professor replies: “Yes. Eumenides?”

Okay, I'm a geek. This one made me LOL. And I think my friend who is a Latin/English teacher will love this one.

[Anonymous]

Two old friends got together for coffee
Friend A: my husband just bought me a new diamond ring
Friend B: That's nice
Friend A: And he took me to Switzerland where we stayed in a 4 star hotel
Friend B:That's nice
Friend A: Then he gave me an unlimited budget to decorate our vacation home in the Hamptons
Friend B: That's nice
Friend A: What did your husband do for you this year?
Friend B: Oh he sent me to charm school
Friend A: Charm school? What for?
Friend B: To learn how to say that's nice instead of f*&^k you

[Anonymous]

Oh my gosh! Love the charm school joke, partly because it's a variation on a joke my dad used to tell. He always loved a good joke. This was like a hug from my dad....

[Anonymous]

Charm school continued: In his version, the one woman had a thick Italian accent and had been given lessons from a language teacher. That's where she learned to say "Atsa nice" instead of "Bull ****!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where does the cowboy take his trash?
To the dump, to the dump, to the dump dump dump

???????

When you say the punchline in your head, try singing it to the tune of the Lone Ranger theme song.

AKA the William Tell Overture

Is this a super old people thing? Boomers? I'm 40 and have zero idea what either of these are.

It's unusual for you not to know William Tell Overture or The Lone Ranger. Did you not grow up in the US? Or maybe you didn't watch TV growing up? I'm 45, so it's not like I was watching the Lone Ranger in it's prime. But it's a widely known and used pop culture reference. And the song is in countless cartoons. My 7yo recognizes it, so it's not a generational thing.

I'm the AKA PP. I agree that it is unusual that you don't know either of those references. No, it's not just a super old thing.

The William Tell Overture is one of the most well known pieces of classical music and has been used for many media productions (of various media forms), the Lone Ranger being one of the most well known. But The William Tell Overture is played for many 4th of July fireworks festivals and is frequently used as an underscore to shows, comedies and cartoons. If you listen to it, I'm betting you'll recognize it and realize that you knew it, but just didn't know the name.

Once someone disparages a thing as "super old people" or "Boomer" they're highly unlikely to back down. Better to look like a jerk than an idiot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Q. What is the difference between a hoover and a harley?


A. Location of the dirtbag.

That is funny!

Similar to:
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?
On a porcupine, the pricks are on the outside.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where does the cowboy take his trash?
To the dump, to the dump, to the dump dump dump

???????

When you say the punchline in your head, try singing it to the tune of the Lone Ranger theme song.

AKA the William Tell Overture

Is this a super old people thing? Boomers? I'm 40 and have zero idea what either of these are.

It's unusual for you not to know William Tell Overture or The Lone Ranger. Did you not grow up in the US? Or maybe you didn't watch TV growing up? I'm 45, so it's not like I was watching the Lone Ranger in it's prime. But it's a widely known and used pop culture reference. And the song is in countless cartoons. My 7yo recognizes it, so it's not a generational thing.

I'm the AKA PP. I agree that it is unusual that you don't know either of those references. No, it's not just a super old thing.

The William Tell Overture is one of the most well known pieces of classical music and has been used for many media productions (of various media forms), the Lone Ranger being one of the most well known. But The William Tell Overture is played for many 4th of July fireworks festivals and is frequently used as an underscore to shows, comedies and cartoons. If you listen to it, I'm betting you'll recognize it and realize that you knew it, but just didn't know the name.

Once someone disparages a thing as "super old people" or "Boomer" they're highly unlikely to back down. Better to look like a jerk than an idiot.

That person failed. They made themselves look like both a jerk and an idiot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Charm school continued: In his version, the one woman had a thick Italian accent and had been given lessons from a language teacher. That's where she learned to say "Atsa nice" instead of "Bull ****!"

Seriously? There's an Italian version? That's gotta be better than when I first heard it in Alabama.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where does the cowboy take his trash?
To the dump, to the dump, to the dump dump dump

???????

When you say the punchline in your head, try singing it to the tune of the Lone Ranger theme song.

AKA the William Tell Overture

Is this a super old people thing? Boomers? I'm 40 and have zero idea what either of these are.

It's unusual for you not to know William Tell Overture or The Lone Ranger. Did you not grow up in the US? Or maybe you didn't watch TV growing up? I'm 45, so it's not like I was watching the Lone Ranger in it's prime. But it's a widely known and used pop culture reference. And the song is in countless cartoons. My 7yo recognizes it, so it's not a generational thing.

I'm the AKA PP. I agree that it is unusual that you don't know either of those references. No, it's not just a super old thing.

The William Tell Overture is one of the most well known pieces of classical music and has been used for many media productions (of various media forms), the Lone Ranger being one of the most well known. But The William Tell Overture is played for many 4th of July fireworks festivals and is frequently used as an underscore to shows, comedies and cartoons. If you listen to it, I'm betting you'll recognize it and realize that you knew it, but just didn't know the name.

Only it's usually 1812 Overture for the 4th of July.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you will be a mile away and you will have their shoes.
Stuart Smalley

?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you will be a mile away and you will have their shoes.
Stuart Smalley

?

Oops, that was supposed to be smiley face