Mothers - How many sex partners would you want your daughter to have prior to marriage?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Many men can also not have sex without feeling bonded and emotionally connected. The movies portray men as only caring about the sex act but talk to lots of boys and young men and they are pining over women they want and are emotionally connected to but who have rejected them or are not interested. Lots of guys become emotionally invested in the women they sleep with."

Guy here. In my experience, that's true for a minority of men. Just sharing my experience.

There are definitely guys that pine. They are usually the ones who have less experience or maybe even no experience.

Once guys get a few experiences under their belt they realize women are largely fungible.

Newsflash lover boy, men are largely fungible too. In fact, I think this is what is being debated. Women are just as sexual as men. Women don't need men to bankroll their existence and control their every move, to include how many partners they may have, etc...

There is a large contingent of women who have responded on this thread who have stated that a low partner count is what they would hope for their daughters

Me too.

Its only an outlier group within the female subset that wants women free to be sluts without any consequences or judgment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Many men can also not have sex without feeling bonded and emotionally connected. The movies portray men as only caring about the sex act but talk to lots of boys and young men and they are pining over women they want and are emotionally connected to but who have rejected them or are not interested. Lots of guys become emotionally invested in the women they sleep with."

Guy here. In my experience, that's true for a minority of men. Just sharing my experience.

There are definitely guys that pine. They are usually the ones who have less experience or maybe even no experience.

Once guys get a few experiences under their belt they realize women are largely fungible.

Newsflash lover boy, men are largely fungible too. In fact, I think this is what is being debated. Women are just as sexual as men. Women don't need men to bankroll their existence and control their every move, to include how many partners they may have, etc...

There is a large contingent of women who have responded on this thread who have stated that a low partner count is what they would hope for their daughters

Me too.

Its only an outlier group within the female subset that wants women free to be sluts without any consequences or judgment

Incorrect. My objection is judging women for being sexually active but not men for the EXACT SAME ACTION. That's bullshit. But beyond that, how does what number of partners other women have negatively affect you? Worry about your own vag.

[Anonymous]

To those posters noting that women, and not men, get pregnant, congratulations, you are correct. This, to me, indicates that I will be serious about discussing birth control with my daughter. But what no one haas explained is why this has fuck all to do with the notion that women, and not men, should limit the number of sexual partners they have. Women can take steps to ensure that there is a 99% chance they won't conceive by using the pill and condoms in combination. If they do get pregnant, they can have an abortion if they don't want to be (oh, fuck, now I've done it).

So I ask again: given the above, why should women have fewer sexual partners than men?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men and women are different sexually.
Men wake up everyday full of testosterone with millions of sperm ready to make babies everyday.
Women have one precious egg a month. For 1 week a month they will have all the feel good hormones kicking in telling them all is right with the world, they will feel very sexually aroused when they are ovulating and the body tells them go have sex now. If the egg is not fertilized then the hormones start to fall and the yucky pms ones set in. Now a woman feels less happy with the world. The body is saying"I didn't get pregnant so get away from me now you (man) are not needed this week." Then a woman bleeds, it is like a period of mourning and the hormones settle down. It all starts again the next month. All of these hormones effect how men and women bond with each other. We use are intellect and the "norms" of society to overcome our differences. BC pills do alter how a woman feels. But I think any mother needs to tell her daughter why she may have different emotional feelings than a man when it comes to sex and why she feels differently during different weeks in the month.

This is an honest answer from an honest woman.Men and women are not the same. people!!

Assuming this is accurate - which it isn't in my experience, FYI - what on earth does this have to do with how many sexual partners men/women "should" have? Gag on the "precious egg" bit. please don't glorify my ovaries. It's creepy.

I am the OP but not the PP in this original quote here. Because the outcomes are so vastly different.Male and female have sex. Male walks away and is never seen again. Female is pregnant for 9 months and has child to care for for 18 years+. Male could never think about it ever again. See how sex is different? And yes, we have found ways to reduce this in current times - but the emotional hard wiring that protects/motivates both genders in this experience still remains and can't be evolved away in two generations.

The reproductive cost for women is exponentially higher biologically, emotionally and socially than for men. This forum is full of women who have left their careers to stay at home for their babies, and those who are working struggling with the challenges of motherhood and childcare. So the whole SAHM and WOHM debate happens because biologically the women are having babies and their brain chemistry which is determining their bonding with their infants,

Can my daughter have sex with men with the same detachment that men have sex with women? Even with condoms and pills - can she be untouched emotionally, compartmentalize sex and carry on with her goals and career? If she can't - then she has no business to have sex unless she is looking for a partner - in that case in her 20s.

Is it healthy to try and overcome the natural instincts and feelings that you lay out there? Just so she can have a new penis inside of her temporarily?

Her natural instinct would be to care deeply for a male, marry him and have children with him, with some reasonable assurance that he will be a good husband and an even better father. She and her husband (or would be husband) would hopefully find sex pleasurable, fulfilling and reinforce their bonding. There is a very big chance that some relationships before marriage may not work out and there will be some heartbreak too. But her instincts would always be to find the "one".

So all this bullshit about women wanting multiple sex partners seem to me to serve the male agenda more than the female. Multiple partners may happen but mainly because relationships do not work out.

She can have a new partner temporarily, just for the fun of it, only if she can behave like a man and have no emotional and psychological impact from this coupling. Since this would be unnatural, unhealthy and distressing to her, she needs to be careful about jumping on the "everybody-have-indiscriminate-sex" bandwagon.

Ah, the soothing warmth of benevolent sexism. You see, women really don't want to have casual sex. They just want a relationship with a "good man."

Some woman want the former. Some want the latter. Some want to have the former while looking for the latter. That's how people work. No one is arguing that women or men should have sex they don't want to have. But there is nothing wrong with casual sex - even lots of casual sex - for women or men, as long as it's safe sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men and women are different sexually.
Men wake up everyday full of testosterone with millions of sperm ready to make babies everyday.
Women have one precious egg a month. For 1 week a month they will have all the feel good hormones kicking in telling them all is right with the world, they will feel very sexually aroused when they are ovulating and the body tells them go have sex now. If the egg is not fertilized then the hormones start to fall and the yucky pms ones set in. Now a woman feels less happy with the world. The body is saying"I didn't get pregnant so get away from me now you (man) are not needed this week." Then a woman bleeds, it is like a period of mourning and the hormones settle down. It all starts again the next month. All of these hormones effect how men and women bond with each other. We use are intellect and the "norms" of society to overcome our differences. BC pills do alter how a woman feels. But I think any mother needs to tell her daughter why she may have different emotional feelings than a man when it comes to sex and why she feels differently during different weeks in the month.

This is an honest answer from an honest woman.Men and women are not the same. people!!

Assuming this is accurate - which it isn't in my experience, FYI - what on earth does this have to do with how many sexual partners men/women "should" have? Gag on the "precious egg" bit. please don't glorify my ovaries. It's creepy.

I am the OP but not the PP in this original quote here. Because the outcomes are so vastly different.Male and female have sex. Male walks away and is never seen again. Female is pregnant for 9 months and has child to care for for 18 years+. Male could never think about it ever again. See how sex is different? And yes, we have found ways to reduce this in current times - but the emotional hard wiring that protects/motivates both genders in this experience still remains and can't be evolved away in two generations.

The reproductive cost for women is exponentially higher biologically, emotionally and socially than for men. This forum is full of women who have left their careers to stay at home for their babies, and those who are working struggling with the challenges of motherhood and childcare. So the whole SAHM and WOHM debate happens because biologically the women are having babies and their brain chemistry which is determining their bonding with their infants,

Can my daughter have sex with men with the same detachment that men have sex with women? Even with condoms and pills - can she be untouched emotionally, compartmentalize sex and carry on with her goals and career? If she can't - then she has no business to have sex unless she is looking for a partner - in that case in her 20s.

Is it healthy to try and overcome the natural instincts and feelings that you lay out there? Just so she can have a new penis inside of her temporarily?

Her natural instinct would be to care deeply for a male, marry him and have children with him, with some reasonable assurance that he will be a good husband and an even better father. She and her husband (or would be husband) would hopefully find sex pleasurable, fulfilling and reinforce their bonding. There is a very big chance that some relationships before marriage may not work out and there will be some heartbreak too. But her instincts would always be to find the "one".

So all this bullshit about women wanting multiple sex partners seem to me to serve the male agenda more than the female. Multiple partners may happen but mainly because relationships do not work out.

She can have a new partner temporarily, just for the fun of it, only if she can behave like a man and have no emotional and psychological impact from this coupling. Since this would be unnatural, unhealthy and distressing to her, she needs to be careful about jumping on the "everybody-have-indiscriminate-sex" bandwagon.

Ah, the soothing warmth of benevolent sexism. You see, women really don't want to have casual sex. They just want a relationship with a "good man."

Some woman want the former. Some want the latter. Some want to have the former while looking for the latter. That's how people work. No one is arguing that women or men should have sex they don't want to have. But there is nothing wrong with casual sex - even lots of casual sex - for women or men, as long as it's safe sex.

+1 And for all these people saying it's fine for men to have casual sex but not women, pray tell, who are they fucking if it's not women, since after all, women shouldn't be having casual sex and all

[Anonymous]

This is why the hookup scene in college benefits men and not most women. Many women play the game and say just hooking up is fine but it really takes a toll on the emotionally. They want a relationship because all that oxytocin is pumping through their bodies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One. The man she intends to marry. This worked out amazingly well for me. Married 12 years, amazing sex life.

How do you know your sex life is 'amazing' if you have nothing to compare it to? You don't have a point of reference, so to speak..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ah, the soothing warmth of benevolent sexism. You see, women really don't want to have casual sex. They just want a relationship with a "good man."

The person who thinks women have sex just to catch a man must have a terrible sex life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men and women are different sexually.
Men wake up everyday full of testosterone with millions of sperm ready to make babies everyday.
Women have one precious egg a month. For 1 week a month they will have all the feel good hormones kicking in telling them all is right with the world, they will feel very sexually aroused when they are ovulating and the body tells them go have sex now. If the egg is not fertilized then the hormones start to fall and the yucky pms ones set in. Now a woman feels less happy with the world. The body is saying"I didn't get pregnant so get away from me now you (man) are not needed this week." Then a woman bleeds, it is like a period of mourning and the hormones settle down. It all starts again the next month. All of these hormones effect how men and women bond with each other. We use are intellect and the "norms" of society to overcome our differences. BC pills do alter how a woman feels. But I think any mother needs to tell her daughter why she may have different emotional feelings than a man when it comes to sex and why she feels differently during different weeks in the month.

This is an honest answer from an honest woman.Men and women are not the same. people!!

Assuming this is accurate - which it isn't in my experience, FYI - what on earth does this have to do with how many sexual partners men/women "should" have? Gag on the "precious egg" bit. please don't glorify my ovaries. It's creepy.

I am the OP but not the PP in this original quote here. Because the outcomes are so vastly different.Male and female have sex. Male walks away and is never seen again. Female is pregnant for 9 months and has child to care for for 18 years+. Male could never think about it ever again. See how sex is different? And yes, we have found ways to reduce this in current times - but the emotional hard wiring that protects/motivates both genders in this experience still remains and can't be evolved away in two generations.

The reproductive cost for women is exponentially higher biologically, emotionally and socially than for men. This forum is full of women who have left their careers to stay at home for their babies, and those who are working struggling with the challenges of motherhood and childcare. So the whole SAHM and WOHM debate happens because biologically the women are having babies and their brain chemistry which is determining their bonding with their infants,

Can my daughter have sex with men with the same detachment that men have sex with women? Even with condoms and pills - can she be untouched emotionally, compartmentalize sex and carry on with her goals and career? If she can't - then she has no business to have sex unless she is looking for a partner - in that case in her 20s.

Is it healthy to try and overcome the natural instincts and feelings that you lay out there? Just so she can have a new penis inside of her temporarily?

Her natural instinct would be to care deeply for a male, marry him and have children with him, with some reasonable assurance that he will be a good husband and an even better father. She and her husband (or would be husband) would hopefully find sex pleasurable, fulfilling and reinforce their bonding. There is a very big chance that some relationships before marriage may not work out and there will be some heartbreak too. But her instincts would always be to find the "one".

So all this bullshit about women wanting multiple sex partners seem to me to serve the male agenda more than the female. Multiple partners may happen but mainly because relationships do not work out.

She can have a new partner temporarily, just for the fun of it, only if she can behave like a man and have no emotional and psychological impact from this coupling. Since this would be unnatural, unhealthy and distressing to her, she needs to be careful about jumping on the "everybody-have-indiscriminate-sex" bandwagon.

Ah, the soothing warmth of benevolent sexism. You see, women really don't want to have casual sex. They just want a relationship with a "good man."

Some woman want the former. Some want the latter. Some want to have the former while looking for the latter. That's how people work. No one is arguing that women or men should have sex they don't want to have. But there is nothing wrong with casual sex - even lots of casual sex - for women or men, as long as it's safe sex.

pretty sure you are a woman arguing with a woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Some woman want the former. Some want the latter. Some want to have the former while looking for the latter. That's how people work. No one is arguing that women or men should have sex they don't want to have. But there is nothing wrong with casual sex - even lots of casual sex - for women or men, as long as it's safe sex.

+1 And for all these people saying it's fine for men to have casual sex but not women, pray tell, who are they fucking if it's not women, since after all, women shouldn't be having casual sex and all


Thats an easy one. Its like 20% of the men having 80% of the sex. It is easy to have all women with low counts (7-10) but then you need to have an unequal distribution among men. Which is definitely the case.

Basically you have a handful (relative) amount of highly desirable males having sex with many many women and when the women are ready to settle down they mate with low count males.

[Anonymous]

OP here: women should be free to have as many sexual partners as they wish. But they are not free from people's perception.

I know that for me if a woman has over 15 partners I really start to wonder about her judgment.

There is a reason most men are repulsed at the notion of their partners having sex with another man. It is largely universal aside from cuckhold fetishists - and cuckholding is a fetish exactly because most all men feel this negative feeling.

Its hard wired. Why? I am not sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here: women should be free to have as many sexual partners as they wish. But they are not free from people's perception.

I know that for me if a woman has over 15 partners I really start to wonder about her judgment.

There is a reason most men are repulsed at the notion of their partners having sex with another man. It is largely universal aside from cuckhold fetishists - and cuckholding is a fetish exactly because most all men feel this negative feeling.

Its hard wired. Why? I am not sure.

Practice what you preach. Don't be a whore if you don't want a whore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One. The man she intends to marry. This worked out amazingly well for me. Married 12 years, amazing sex life.

How do you know your sex life is 'amazing' if you have nothing to compare it to? You don't have a point of reference, so to speak..

You know it when you have an orgasms. or when you have many orgasms. Wanting your partner, frequent sex, experimenting and orgasms. In my book makes for amazing sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men and women are different sexually.
Men wake up everyday full of testosterone with millions of sperm ready to make babies everyday.
Women have one precious egg a month. For 1 week a month they will have all the feel good hormones kicking in telling them all is right with the world, they will feel very sexually aroused when they are ovulating and the body tells them go have sex now. If the egg is not fertilized then the hormones start to fall and the yucky pms ones set in. Now a woman feels less happy with the world. The body is saying"I didn't get pregnant so get away from me now you (man) are not needed this week." Then a woman bleeds, it is like a period of mourning and the hormones settle down. It all starts again the next month. All of these hormones effect how men and women bond with each other. We use are intellect and the "norms" of society to overcome our differences. BC pills do alter how a woman feels. But I think any mother needs to tell her daughter why she may have different emotional feelings than a man when it comes to sex and why she feels differently during different weeks in the month.

This is an honest answer from an honest woman.Men and women are not the same. people!!

Assuming this is accurate - which it isn't in my experience, FYI - what on earth does this have to do with how many sexual partners men/women "should" have? Gag on the "precious egg" bit. please don't glorify my ovaries. It's creepy.

I am the OP but not the PP in this original quote here. Because the outcomes are so vastly different.Male and female have sex. Male walks away and is never seen again. Female is pregnant for 9 months and has child to care for for 18 years+. Male could never think about it ever again. See how sex is different? And yes, we have found ways to reduce this in current times - but the emotional hard wiring that protects/motivates both genders in this experience still remains and can't be evolved away in two generations.

The reproductive cost for women is exponentially higher biologically, emotionally and socially than for men. This forum is full of women who have left their careers to stay at home for their babies, and those who are working struggling with the challenges of motherhood and childcare. So the whole SAHM and WOHM debate happens because biologically the women are having babies and their brain chemistry which is determining their bonding with their infants,

Can my daughter have sex with men with the same detachment that men have sex with women? Even with condoms and pills - can she be untouched emotionally, compartmentalize sex and carry on with her goals and career? If she can't - then she has no business to have sex unless she is looking for a partner - in that case in her 20s.

Is it healthy to try and overcome the natural instincts and feelings that you lay out there? Just so she can have a new penis inside of her temporarily?

Her natural instinct would be to care deeply for a male, marry him and have children with him, with some reasonable assurance that he will be a good husband and an even better father. She and her husband (or would be husband) would hopefully find sex pleasurable, fulfilling and reinforce their bonding. There is a very big chance that some relationships before marriage may not work out and there will be some heartbreak too. But her instincts would always be to find the "one".

So all this bullshit about women wanting multiple sex partners seem to me to serve the male agenda more than the female. Multiple partners may happen but mainly because relationships do not work out.

She can have a new partner temporarily, just for the fun of it, only if she can behave like a man and have no emotional and psychological impact from this coupling. Since this would be unnatural, unhealthy and distressing to her, she needs to be careful about jumping on the "everybody-have-indiscriminate-sex" bandwagon.

Ah, the soothing warmth of benevolent sexism. You see, women really don't want to have casual sex. They just want a relationship with a "good man."

Some woman want the former. Some want the latter. Some want to have the former while looking for the latter. That's how people work. No one is arguing that women or men should have sex they don't want to have. But there is nothing wrong with casual sex - even lots of casual sex - for women or men, as long as it's safe sex.

pretty sure you are a woman arguing with a woman.

Pretty sure it is essentially a slut vs. a non-slut argument

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men and women are different sexually.
Men wake up everyday full of testosterone with millions of sperm ready to make babies everyday.
Women have one precious egg a month. For 1 week a month they will have all the feel good hormones kicking in telling them all is right with the world, they will feel very sexually aroused when they are ovulating and the body tells them go have sex now. If the egg is not fertilized then the hormones start to fall and the yucky pms ones set in. Now a woman feels less happy with the world. The body is saying"I didn't get pregnant so get away from me now you (man) are not needed this week." Then a woman bleeds, it is like a period of mourning and the hormones settle down. It all starts again the next month. All of these hormones effect how men and women bond with each other. We use are intellect and the "norms" of society to overcome our differences. BC pills do alter how a woman feels. But I think any mother needs to tell her daughter why she may have different emotional feelings than a man when it comes to sex and why she feels differently during different weeks in the month.

This is an honest answer from an honest woman.Men and women are not the same. people!!

Assuming this is accurate - which it isn't in my experience, FYI - what on earth does this have to do with how many sexual partners men/women "should" have? Gag on the "precious egg" bit. please don't glorify my ovaries. It's creepy.

I am the OP but not the PP in this original quote here. Because the outcomes are so vastly different.Male and female have sex. Male walks away and is never seen again. Female is pregnant for 9 months and has child to care for for 18 years+. Male could never think about it ever again. See how sex is different? And yes, we have found ways to reduce this in current times - but the emotional hard wiring that protects/motivates both genders in this experience still remains and can't be evolved away in two generations.

The reproductive cost for women is exponentially higher biologically, emotionally and socially than for men. This forum is full of women who have left their careers to stay at home for their babies, and those who are working struggling with the challenges of motherhood and childcare. So the whole SAHM and WOHM debate happens because biologically the women are having babies and their brain chemistry which is determining their bonding with their infants,

Can my daughter have sex with men with the same detachment that men have sex with women? Even with condoms and pills - can she be untouched emotionally, compartmentalize sex and carry on with her goals and career? If she can't - then she has no business to have sex unless she is looking for a partner - in that case in her 20s.

Is it healthy to try and overcome the natural instincts and feelings that you lay out there? Just so she can have a new penis inside of her temporarily?

Her natural instinct would be to care deeply for a male, marry him and have children with him, with some reasonable assurance that he will be a good husband and an even better father. She and her husband (or would be husband) would hopefully find sex pleasurable, fulfilling and reinforce their bonding. There is a very big chance that some relationships before marriage may not work out and there will be some heartbreak too. But her instincts would always be to find the "one".

So all this bullshit about women wanting multiple sex partners seem to me to serve the male agenda more than the female. Multiple partners may happen but mainly because relationships do not work out.

She can have a new partner temporarily, just for the fun of it, only if she can behave like a man and have no emotional and psychological impact from this coupling. Since this would be unnatural, unhealthy and distressing to her, she needs to be careful about jumping on the "everybody-have-indiscriminate-sex" bandwagon.

Ah, the soothing warmth of benevolent sexism. You see, women really don't want to have casual sex. They just want a relationship with a "good man."

Some woman want the former. Some want the latter. Some want to have the former while looking for the latter. That's how people work. No one is arguing that women or men should have sex they don't want to have. But there is nothing wrong with casual sex - even lots of casual sex - for women or men, as long as it's safe sex.

+1 And for all these people saying it's fine for men to have casual sex but not women, pray tell, who are they fucking if it's not women, since after all, women shouldn't be having casual sex and all

they can f** all the women they want, but not my daughters. i am one of the female PPs who wants low count for her daughters and i couldn't care less would other women are doing.