Easy. Have two sandwiches |
So eat two sandwiches. You think laundry from one baby is a lot? That’s cute. Your baby isn’t colicky, doesn’t have reflux, doesn’t take hours to put to sleep, and takes a 3 hour nap? You have no idea how easy you have it right now. Don’t have any more kids. Seriously |
OP I'm not a fan of lazy husbands... but I do think you need to make this simpler for yourself. I would encourage you to stop pumping at night. Roll over, nurse baby in bed, place baby back and everyone goes back to sleep. Don't turn on lights, don't get up out of bed, don't change diapers (get better ones!!). I personally couldn't go without sleep, so that was my attack plan. 3 babies, I EBF and dh never got up once because it was too hard for me (woke both of us up, I leaked milk everywhere and pumping totally wakes you up). If you don't fully wake up, you will be able to go back to sleep very easily.
You're currently choosing the hardest path (pumping, bottle feeding and nursing). Either choose to breastfeed or go with formula. Also, baby should start dropping wakeups soon. By 8 weeks, most are down to 1-2 and by 12 some start STTN. |
After reading the updates- team DH. I think he's not on board with her martyrdom. Choosing to pump is a personal choice and it isn't the best method. You're choosing the hardest path possible, so why should his sleep suffer for it too? You're like my friend who whined that her husband wouldn't help with her 150 Christmas cards. He doesn't help.... because he thinks it's too much! |
All this! It’s best advice. Pumping sucks and I don’t know why anyone would do it voluntarily. You have to do everything you can to maximize your sleep options. I would also do most middle of the night feedings and DH did early morning. |
I think new parents don’t get the idea of “night parenting”. Being a parent is a 24 hour/7 days a week gig. |
Agreed. All that super organic healthy food and she has supply issues? Maybe her diet is part of the problem. This person can not be real. |
The man will go back to helping like he was before he went back to work and a new deal has to be worked out. Sorry, the one staying home has no pressure to perform at work. Can’t be fired from being a parent, but you can from not performing well at work. The man baby is doing his role for the family as is the mother and it will be tough for a time while baby needs to be fed every few hours. |
Who wakes up when a baby cries in the middle of the night? Answer - the mom. Dads sleep through everything. It's nature telling us what to do. Don't mess with nature. |
Your husband is being selfish, as men usually are where babies are concerned. Mine had me doing all the night waking, and I was breastfeeding and pumping to keep a stash for daycare. I also went back to my nursing job doing 12 hr shifts. And doing all the night waking.
He's an ex husband, for many reasons. If you ask him, the babies slept great and never interrupted his sleep. The reality is that he sleeps very soundly, a bomb could go off and he doesn't wake up, much less to a crying baby. The baby stage was easy and great for him. Only because I made it so. |
What’s even the point of a dude like you? Woman would be better off a single mother than with a pointless “partner”. |
Not reading all the responses…you have one kid?! sorry, but your husband is right, are you kidding me, you are staying home and can nap when baby naps. He’s at work. If you both worked , that’s a different situation. Once you return to work, you will need a new system, but right now, you should be doing all the night feeding and leave your husband sleep. |
There are moments during marriage, when your baby is awake yet again, and your husband is sleeping like a rock through it all. You will look at your husband and probably have a fleeting thought of smothering him with his own pillow. Welcome to motherhood with most men. |
I generally agree with this, with the caveat that he handles all feedings on the weekends so OP can get two nights of uninterrupted sleep. I know you can't "catch up" on sleep, but there's a big difference between an unending expanse of bad sleep and seeing a day in the not too distant future when you can sleep through the night. Also, you should have him do what you describe as the "bedtime feeding" and go to sleep as soon as he gets home/off work. That'll give you a bigger block of time to sleep. |
You on maternity leave. He is noongerno leave and is working. This is why you have maternity leave |