Weird situation with new neighbor from high school - WWYD

[Anonymous]

The fact that you don't remember what you did says a lot. You likely acted like a mean girl and that woman was so unimportant in your mean teen world that you erased her from your memory. I believe she is right. She will NEVER forget how you made her feel.

You better apologize and try to make it up to her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whole lot of pathetic 30 and 40-something professional victims here still clinging to perceived high school slights. As an orange imbecile would say, sad.

And before you clap back with the idiotic HARRR HARRR FOUND THE MEAN GIRL BULLY, I was in the arts in a huge high school and other than sitting next to them in English or math class, I never interacted with any kid in my high school who wasn’t in my arts discipline, so no, I was neither “popular” in the larger school nor a “bully”

Maybe, but you also don’t state that you were bullied. Until you have experienced that, you don’t have a leg to stand on.

NP. I was bullied throughout high school by a particular girl a year older than me. My friends and I joke that she was born mean. She’s now a pastor’s wife. For real. But I would NEVER approach her husband, let alone her minor kids and tell them their wife/mom was mean to me 30 years ago. It’s one thing to approach the person you have an issue with, it’s completely different to approach the person’s family!

I disagree. It's weird AF to approach anybody about something that happened 30 YEARS AGO! The window of opportunity/statute of limitations has long since passed. Get over it or risk seeming crazy for approaching the person with 30 year-old news.

NP and I disagree with you. It is fine to approach your former bully and let them know what they did. For most victims, it can take well into adulthood to overcome their high school torment and have the confidence to address it.

However, this case isn't it. The new neighbor's approach is all wrong and especially inappropriate when it comes to OP's kids. I'd be wary of her and give her a wide berth. She does not seem interested in healing, but rather stirring up trouble.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes. I just read this whole thread and whether or not the OP bullied this neighbor, neighbor was WAY out of line approaching the kids and saying what she did. How are some not seeing how wrong this is??

Agree. I was bullied in school so I know how hurtful it is.

If the neighbor truly feels victimized by OP and needs to say something, then she should do it in a 1:1 communication.

If I were OP's victim I would be more stealthy and less confrontational, but OP would have an enemy in her own neighborhood plotting revenge. Revenge is best served up cold. What your back OP, you got it coming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes. I just read this whole thread and whether or not the OP bullied this neighbor, neighbor was WAY out of line approaching the kids and saying what she did. How are some not seeing how wrong this is??

Agree. I was bullied in school so I know how hurtful it is.

If the neighbor truly feels victimized by OP and needs to say something, then she should do it in a 1:1 communication.

If I were OP's victim I would be more stealthy and less confrontational, but OP would have an enemy in her own neighborhood plotting revenge. Revenge is best served up cold. What your back OP, you got it coming.

You're emotionally stunted at best and sociopath at worst. Seek help.

[Anonymous]

Wow I think I agree with the “increase the med dosage PP” you all need some therapy to get over your HIGH SCHOOL perceptions of bullying. It’s not bullying if the popular kids didn’t invite you for a sleepover.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow I think I agree with the “increase the med dosage PP” you all need some therapy to get over your HIGH SCHOOL perceptions of bullying. It’s not bullying if the popular kids didn’t invite you for a sleepover.

Oh hello Bully.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow I think I agree with the “increase the med dosage PP” you all need some therapy to get over your HIGH SCHOOL perceptions of bullying. It’s not bullying if the popular kids didn’t invite you for a sleepover.

Oh hello Bully.

You’re behaving like a child. You don’t have some magical power over people nor can you shut them down by calling them a name. They’re not going to get cancelled because you toss around the term bully. It doesn’t work like that.

And the premise is entirely correct. Not feeling a part of things does not equate to bullying. We all felt this way at some point I’m sure.

[Anonymous]

I would be so embarrassed if I had been thinking about somebody for 30 years and later found out they legitimately had no recollection of who I am/was. Talk about insult to injury.

[Anonymous]

The OP never came back. She must have forgotten that this thread exists, and she's currently consulting two fb friends to see if they remember it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow I think I agree with the “increase the med dosage PP” you all need some therapy to get over your HIGH SCHOOL perceptions of bullying. It’s not bullying if the popular kids didn’t invite you for a sleepover.

Oh hello Bully.

You’re behaving like a child. You don’t have some magical power over people nor can you shut them down by calling them a name. They’re not going to get cancelled because you toss around the term bully. It doesn’t work like that.

And the premise is entirely correct. Not feeling a part of things does not equate to bullying. We all felt this way at some point I’m sure.

How can we cancel you, we have no idea who you are. BUT, when you defend bullies, you sound like a bully yourself. When you don't believe bullying exists, you sound very out of touch, at best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow I think I agree with the “increase the med dosage PP” you all need some therapy to get over your HIGH SCHOOL perceptions of bullying. It’s not bullying if the popular kids didn’t invite you for a sleepover.

Oh hello Bully.

You’re behaving like a child. You don’t have some magical power over people nor can you shut them down by calling them a name. They’re not going to get cancelled because you toss around the term bully. It doesn’t work like that.

And the premise is entirely correct. Not feeling a part of things does not equate to bullying. We all felt this way at some point I’m sure.

How can we cancel you, we have no idea who you are. BUT, when you defend bullies, you sound like a bully yourself. When you don't believe bullying exists, you sound very out of touch, at best.

But nobody said bullying does not exist. Nowhere here did anyone say that. They said that not feeling included or not being invited is not per se bullying. That’s absolutely true. The idea that it is is incredibly out of touch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you ever see the movie Ma with Octavia Spencer? Same scenario. Octavia's character was bullied in High School and she strikes up a friendship with the bully's kids. It doesn't end well. I'd be careful if I were you!

This doesn’t make your case the way you think it does. This isn’t even funny if that is what you are going for. Yikes.

Oh lighten up. I think the OP is making way too much of this. Just stay away from the lady.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The fact that you don't remember what you did says a lot. You likely acted like a mean girl and that woman was so unimportant in your mean teen world that you erased her from your memory. I believe she is right. She will NEVER forget how you made her feel.

You better apologize and try to make it up to her.

Yo u seem to be projecting a bit much here. Why don’t you find your hs bully and have it out since you seem to think whatever this situation is mirrors your own and what you wished would happen to you. OP doesn’t owe crazy neighbor anything at this point. Go find your own former bully to harass and demand apologies. She probably doesn’t remember you either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow I think I agree with the “increase the med dosage PP” you all need some therapy to get over your HIGH SCHOOL perceptions of bullying. It’s not bullying if the popular kids didn’t invite you for a sleepover.

Oh hello Bully.

You’re behaving like a child. You don’t have some magical power over people nor can you shut them down by calling them a name. They’re not going to get cancelled because you toss around the term bully. It doesn’t work like that.

And the premise is entirely correct. Not feeling a part of things does not equate to bullying. We all felt this way at some point I’m sure.

How can we cancel you, we have no idea who you are. BUT, when you defend bullies, you sound like a bully yourself. When you don't believe bullying exists, you sound very out of touch, at best.

What do you call adults who act inappropriately with young kids?

[Anonymous]

There are two factors at play here:
1. OP was probably a bully in high school and either doesn't want to admit it or is choosing to not remember
2. Neighbor was obviously damaged by OPs mean girl behavior. But neighbor is also acting inappropriately by approaching OPs kids.
CONCLUSION: OP should apologize and neighbor should seek therapy.