Weird situation with new neighbor from high school - WWYD

[Anonymous]

My only takeaway from this thread is that many of you need your dosages increased. Some of you are legit insane, but words like "gaslighting" and "mean girls" give you cover for being crazy outcasts who I can understand why nobody wants to be bothered with. You are too much for anyone normal to want to deal with--- take ownership. You likely weren't bullied people just don't like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My only takeaway from this thread is that many of you need your dosages increased. Some of you are legit insane, but words like "gaslighting" and "mean girls" give you cover for being crazy outcasts who I can understand why nobody wants to be bothered with. You are too much for anyone normal to want to deal with--- take ownership. You likely weren't bullied people just don't like you.

I see you've graduated from high school bully to internet bully. Having fun?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My only takeaway from this thread is that many of you need your dosages increased. Some of you are legit insane, but words like "gaslighting" and "mean girls" give you cover for being crazy outcasts who I can understand why nobody wants to be bothered with. You are too much for anyone normal to want to deal with--- take ownership. You likely weren't bullied people just don't like you.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the mind of a real life bully.

[Anonymous]

Helpful NIH article about what bullying is and the long term effects:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4552909/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is why we need to teach our children to be kind. Mean kids in high school scar their victims for life. While you may not remember your cruelty to this person, she does. You should apologize to her, genuinely. I am guessing you were mean to other people, too, not just her. Reflect on your viciousness and think about what you have learned since then that changed your behavior. You still sound mean, quite honestly.

+1. Just apologize. Short and to the point.

Stop throwing around buzz words. What exactly is mean? How do you know OP was mean? What in her post is mean? Just because you want to be a victim doesn’t mean OP is the villain.

We know OP was mean because people don’t make this stuff up out of the blue. OP needs to do some serious soul searching and apologize.

No, no, no. SANE grounded normal people do not make this kind of stuff up. That is true. A woman that would approach after hunting down children, and a husband, and let loose with her version of events is not that. And OP has told us she reached out to high school friends and nobody else supports or agrees with this woman's recollection. More that she wanted to be included and was not. That is not bullying. We have no more reason to believe this woman because she leveled an accusation at OP that is subjective and based on her own recollection than we do to believe OP. OP does not need to apologize. She needs to protect her family.

[Anonymous]

Question for the bullying deniers: do you dismiss and disbelieve other types of abuse? Abuse comes in many forms, both physical and emotional. Do you believe victims of childhood sexual abuse, spousal abuse, sexual harassment etc? Or do you dismiss it and claim the victim is insane?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Question for the bullying deniers: do you dismiss and disbelieve other types of abuse? Abuse comes in many forms, both physical and emotional. Do you believe victims of childhood sexual abuse, spousal abuse, sexual harassment etc? Or do you dismiss it and claim the victim is insane?

I don’t think anyone has done that. But generally some kind of corroboration or evidence is needed, right? Otherwise anyone could go around accusing anyone of anything. So while yes, I would believe anyone that approached me and told me about abuse, I’m not automatically buying into it here.

[Anonymous]

Yikes. I just read this whole thread and whether or not the OP bullied this neighbor, neighbor was WAY out of line approaching the kids and saying what she did. How are some not seeing how wrong this is??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Question for the bullying deniers: do you dismiss and disbelieve other types of abuse? Abuse comes in many forms, both physical and emotional. Do you believe victims of childhood sexual abuse, spousal abuse, sexual harassment etc? Or do you dismiss it and claim the victim is insane?

I don’t think anyone has done that. But generally some kind of corroboration or evidence is needed, right? Otherwise anyone could go around accusing anyone of anything. So while yes, I would believe anyone that approached me and told me about abuse, I’m not automatically buying into it here.

In this context the “abuse” is subjective though, right? OP knows she did not call her names, harass her, ostracize her. Yet this woman felt that OP was unkind. What specifically we are talking about matters. This is far different than child sexual abuse for goodness sakes. Even workplace harassment requires some level of objective harrassment to be actionable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yikes. I just read this whole thread and whether or not the OP bullied this neighbor, neighbor was WAY out of line approaching the kids and saying what she did. How are some not seeing how wrong this is??

I know. It is wild. Several even said good for this poor “bullied” woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes. I just read this whole thread and whether or not the OP bullied this neighbor, neighbor was WAY out of line approaching the kids and saying what she did. How are some not seeing how wrong this is??

I know. It is wild. Several even said good for this poor “bullied” woman.

Agreed. I’d have a very different opinion if the neighbor had only talked to the adults involved. Kids is way out of line.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Question for the bullying deniers: do you dismiss and disbelieve other types of abuse? Abuse comes in many forms, both physical and emotional. Do you believe victims of childhood sexual abuse, spousal abuse, sexual harassment etc? Or do you dismiss it and claim the victim is insane?

I don’t think anyone has done that. But generally some kind of corroboration or evidence is needed, right? Otherwise anyone could go around accusing anyone of anything. So while yes, I would believe anyone that approached me and told me about abuse, I’m not automatically buying into it here.

In this context the “abuse” is subjective though, right? OP knows she did not call her names, harass her, ostracize her. Yet this woman felt that OP was unkind. What specifically we are talking about matters. This is far different than child sexual abuse for goodness sakes. Even workplace harassment requires some level of objective harrassment to be actionable.

You do realize that OPs account of things will be her version, her memory and her twisting things so she comes out smelling like a rise, right? How often does an abuser fully “remember” or admit to wrongdoing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Question for the bullying deniers: do you dismiss and disbelieve other types of abuse? Abuse comes in many forms, both physical and emotional. Do you believe victims of childhood sexual abuse, spousal abuse, sexual harassment etc? Or do you dismiss it and claim the victim is insane?

I don’t think anyone has done that. But generally some kind of corroboration or evidence is needed, right? Otherwise anyone could go around accusing anyone of anything. So while yes, I would believe anyone that approached me and told me about abuse, I’m not automatically buying into it here.

In this context the “abuse” is subjective though, right? OP knows she did not call her names, harass her, ostracize her. Yet this woman felt that OP was unkind. What specifically we are talking about matters. This is far different than child sexual abuse for goodness sakes. Even workplace harassment requires some level of objective harrassment to be actionable.

You do realize that OPs account of things will be her version, her memory and her twisting things so she comes out smelling like a rise, right? How often does an abuser fully “remember” or admit to wrongdoing?

I don’t think that means we have to automatically believe an unhinged woman who went to OP’s minor children. Right?

[Anonymous]

May I just add here that the bizarre mental state propelling this woman to approach OP's kids and have her husband discuss the "situation" with OP's husband is likely the same mental state that led people to avoid her earlier in life and/or to perceive avoidance as bullying. Going up to someone's kids who you do not know and talking to them AT ALL is a little odd. Bringing something like this up is just beyond inappropriate. So, she's probably nuts and always has been. It doesn't seem that OP's "bullying" was the source of the problem--more likely one of many consequences.

[Anonymous]

I was heavily bullied K-12. And yes if I found the three second grade kids who held be down stole my life much money, punched, kicked and spit on me to take my lunch money on only day of school year mom gave me money for lunch I be pissed.

I kinda later became insult comedian in HS and Jr. HS. At a bar I once ran into someone I really must have annoyed this person in HS. They corner me and literally screamed and yelled at what I did till they calmed down. Looks like felt better and left. I said I was sorry and all that.

I have absolutely no clue who this person was or what I said. But some is very emotional. I am sure you did something

I recall a boy on bus in middle school started going on about the funky smell coming from a girl and turns out was a first period. He laughed it off. But she was humiliated. I am sure she hates all of us in the bus as no one stood up for her