NYT article on LCPS high school re: racism

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have mixed feelings about this. I think a white 15 year old is absolutely old enough to know not to use the n-word, but she probably used it for shock value/transgression. From the article, it sounds like the word is frequently used as a direct slur at the school (not the way Mimi used it). So I can understand why black kids would react to the TikTok. But, the widespread use of the n-word in popular culture absolutely muddies the waters. Now we expect really very young white kids to understand why a word they literally hear ALL the time (I hear it repeatedly myself when working out to Lizzo!) is also a toxic word that they can never, ever say under penalty of extreme ostracization. Yes their parents should teach them, but it's a hard conversation to have.

I get so sick of hearing white people say this. Do you realize that Black parents need to have conversations with their children about simple things they shouldn’t do with the hope that these conversations will save their lives. Don’t wear a hoodie in a white neighborhood after dark. Be as accommodating to a police officer as possible. You have to be twice as good as your white counterparts to get equivalent jobs (but still be paid less). THOSE are difficult conversations.

I'm saying it's "hard" in that it is hard to explain properly in a way that ensures your kid will behave in a certain way. My kid is younger (8) but it is just factually and conceptually difficult to explain to him why a word can be used by celebrities and kids in his class, but never, ever, ever by him under penalty of something terrible happening to him. Frankly that kind of discussion (which has to be fear/punishment based) makes it harder to have the actual conversations I also want to have with him to create empathy. My son has HFA but I imagine it is also hard for NT white kids to understand the situation.

That’s because you haven’t done the work since they were little. If you only make it about the N word yeah it might not make sense. You have to start this when they are young and instill in them that some of their peers are mistreated due to their race and it is THEIR job as white kids not to allow it and to push back on it. You have to show your kids the tremendous amount of privilege they have simply by being white so they grow up self aware. Don’t blame your son being on the spectrum of you didn’t do this and don’t know how to now approach the N word out of nowhere.

There are no magic words or lectures that will stop kids from doing impulsive things. And yes, I have all of those conversations. My point is that the frank arbitrariness of the n-word at this point is hard to explain from a values and factual perspective, and instead is something I have to instill fear in him about. Which is counterproductive to the rest of the conversation.

And again to be clear - the second my son hears the n word he’s going to lock onto it and want to say it. That’s just the way he is. You don’t have a kid with special needs, so you have your own privilege as well. I’m just hoping when/if he uses it he is not subject to the kind of toxic vindictiveness of this girl and instead gets a chance to experience the natural and proportionate consequences, not a crazy overreaction.

I don't think anyone would blame your son. Especially, if you explain the situation and teach him it's the societal equivalent of bandying about the f-word. If they do blame him, then they are just trash human being.

The kid who released the video seems like a vindictive petty little twerp. I'm annoyed with the girl who said this but anyone who thinks his response was appropriate is out-of-thier mind. As for the people who keep saying, she is 15...your kids know not to shout expletives and profanities all-day, why would they say the n-word. As a black person, our parents taught us the word was just that, low-brow and offensive.

You are an ass. Kids know not to do this. I do have sympathy for this girl but she will be fine unlike the black kids in our school system who are always assumed to be less than. Always less than.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have mixed feelings about this. I think a white 15 year old is absolutely old enough to know not to use the n-word, but she probably used it for shock value/transgression. From the article, it sounds like the word is frequently used as a direct slur at the school (not the way Mimi used it). So I can understand why black kids would react to the TikTok. But, the widespread use of the n-word in popular culture absolutely muddies the waters. Now we expect really very young white kids to understand why a word they literally hear ALL the time (I hear it repeatedly myself when working out to Lizzo!) is also a toxic word that they can never, ever say under penalty of extreme ostracization. Yes their parents should teach them, but it's a hard conversation to have.

I get so sick of hearing white people say this. Do you realize that Black parents need to have conversations with their children about simple things they shouldn’t do with the hope that these conversations will save their lives. Don’t wear a hoodie in a white neighborhood after dark. Be as accommodating to a police officer as possible. You have to be twice as good as your white counterparts to get equivalent jobs (but still be paid less). THOSE are difficult conversations.

I'm saying it's "hard" in that it is hard to explain properly in a way that ensures your kid will behave in a certain way. My kid is younger (8) but it is just factually and conceptually difficult to explain to him why a word can be used by celebrities and kids in his class, but never, ever, ever by him under penalty of something terrible happening to him. Frankly that kind of discussion (which has to be fear/punishment based) makes it harder to have the actual conversations I also want to have with him to create empathy. My son has HFA but I imagine it is also hard for NT white kids to understand the situation.

That’s because you haven’t done the work since they were little. If you only make it about the N word yeah it might not make sense. You have to start this when they are young and instill in them that some of their peers are mistreated due to their race and it is THEIR job as white kids not to allow it and to push back on it. You have to show your kids the tremendous amount of privilege they have simply by being white so they grow up self aware. Don’t blame your son being on the spectrum of you didn’t do this and don’t know how to now approach the N word out of nowhere.

There are no magic words or lectures that will stop kids from doing impulsive things. And yes, I have all of those conversations. My point is that the frank arbitrariness of the n-word at this point is hard to explain from a values and factual perspective, and instead is something I have to instill fear in him about. Which is counterproductive to the rest of the conversation.

And again to be clear - the second my son hears the n word he’s going to lock onto it and want to say it. That’s just the way he is. You don’t have a kid with special needs, so you have your own privilege as well. I’m just hoping when/if he uses it he is not subject to the kind of toxic vindictiveness of this girl and instead gets a chance to experience the natural and proportionate consequences, not a crazy overreaction.

I don't think anyone would blame your son. Especially, if you explain the situation and teach him it's the societal equivalent of bandying about the f-word. If they do blame him, then they are just trash human being.

The kid who released the video seems like a vindictive petty little twerp. I'm annoyed with the girl who said this but anyone who thinks his response was appropriate is out-of-thier mind. As for the people who keep saying, she is 15...your kids know not to shout expletives and profanities all-day, why would they say the n-word. As a black person, our parents taught us the word was just that, low-brow and offensive.

You are an ass. Kids know not to do this. I do have sympathy for this girl but she will be fine unlike the black kids in our school system who are always assumed to be less than. Always less than.

'

Oh, please. A Black girl in this area who was a vocal advocate of getting her school renamed just got into Stanford. Jimmy's mistake was thinking this outing of a peer would pay off for him the same way. Instead, a lot of people are calling him a psychopath and he's stuck at a TT school.

[Anonymous]

As you can see a lot of people in this thread are just as racist as the girl and are raising their kids to be racist too. They just get away with it because they aren’t so crass as to say the N word. The majority of this thread is crapping on the Black boy and claiming his future is or should be ruined. Telling on themselves.

[Anonymous]

Oh, please. A Black girl in this area who was a vocal advocate of getting her school renamed just got into Stanford. Jimmy's mistake was thinking this outing of a peer would pay off for him the same way. Instead, a lot of people are calling him a psychopath and he's stuck at a TT school.

I mean, that young woman was working toward systemic change through grassroots organizing and shifting the balance of power.

Jimmy flat-out admitted to timing this release to do maximum damage to a single individual, who was not an elected official or person with power. I'm not sympathizing with Mimi here - she and her parents come off self-absorbed and over-coached without real contrition. But these scenarios (changing the name of a HS vs. outing someone using racist slang) are not at all comparable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As you can see a lot of people in this thread are just as racist as the girl and are raising their kids to be racist too. They just get away with it because they aren’t so crass as to say the N word. The majority of this thread is crapping on the Black boy and claiming his future is or should be ruined. Telling on themselves.

I mean, he gave a long and public account about how he saved up a compromising piece of information to create maximum damage. Not to actually address the issue of racism at school. I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he actually didn't really plan it that way - he just got frustrated by a bunch of different things, and then decided to take action on the TikTok. But if you can't see how he comes off poorly, then that's on you. OTOH he is still a child too and may not totally understand. +

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The n word is not arbitrary

Black people can say it
White people cant
Because white people use it as a tool of dehumanization and there’s no other way white people can use it

That’s not complicated

+ 1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The n word is not arbitrary

Black people can say it
White people cant
Because white people use it as a tool of dehumanization and there’s no other way white people can use it

That’s not complicated

I don't know what planet you've been living on if you think some black people don't use this and other words as tools of ridicule and dehumanization.

One can argue whether it comes from a place of self-loathing or internalized racism, but not that its use by blacks is often offensive and dehumanizing. Black people simply now have a license than others, especially whites, aren't granted when it comes to slang and the inferences drawn from its use.

Many of us are tired of it. We have no desire to use any variant of the n-word ourselves, and have given our own kids the "talk" about the double standard, but we're also sick of seeing our young people sacrificed because of things they did in their early teens and treated as collateral damage by deranged SJWs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have mixed feelings about this. I think a white 15 year old is absolutely old enough to know not to use the n-word, but she probably used it for shock value/transgression. From the article, it sounds like the word is frequently used as a direct slur at the school (not the way Mimi used it). So I can understand why black kids would react to the TikTok. But, the widespread use of the n-word in popular culture absolutely muddies the waters. Now we expect really very young white kids to understand why a word they literally hear ALL the time (I hear it repeatedly myself when working out to Lizzo!) is also a toxic word that they can never, ever say under penalty of extreme ostracization. Yes their parents should teach them, but it's a hard conversation to have.

I get so sick of hearing white people say this. Do you realize that Black parents need to have conversations with their children about simple things they shouldn’t do with the hope that these conversations will save their lives. Don’t wear a hoodie in a white neighborhood after dark. Be as accommodating to a police officer as possible. You have to be twice as good as your white counterparts to get equivalent jobs (but still be paid less). THOSE are difficult conversations.

I'm saying it's "hard" in that it is hard to explain properly in a way that ensures your kid will behave in a certain way. My kid is younger (8) but it is just factually and conceptually difficult to explain to him why a word can be used by celebrities and kids in his class, but never, ever, ever by him under penalty of something terrible happening to him. Frankly that kind of discussion (which has to be fear/punishment based) makes it harder to have the actual conversations I also want to have with him to create empathy. My son has HFA but I imagine it is also hard for NT white kids to understand the situation.

I'm the PP who thinks both of the young adults in this story kind of suck, but it's actually not that hard to explain to a NT elementary schooler why they can't use the n-word, even if their frends do. I've had the discussion with my kids multiple times, particuarly because they attend schools where they hear it bandied about by Black peers. I'm not mad that they can't say it (unlike some on this thread) and they seem to understand that there are some words they just can't use. I can see how it might be harder for a kid on the spectrum, but I don't want other white parents of NT white kids on this thread to take your situation as an excuse to not have these discussions with their white kids.

I agree that it’s a necessary and Importamt conversation to have with kids starting very young and including “even if you hear it in songs, even if your Black friend says it, even if it’s in English class.” Parents should also have those discussions around misogynist talk, anti-Semitic “jokes, using offensive language about intellectual disability etc. it does seem like if those talks either don’t happen or don’t work there should be the same standard for racist language as there is for anti-Semitic, etc. if we as a society decide that appropriate consequences include getting kicked out of college four years later than let’s be explicit about it.

If your grades at 15 matter, so do your offensive words.

[Anonymous]

This thread illuminates how this girl came to think what she did is ok. She was raised by people like many of the posters here. Be careful it's not your child next. And if it is, they deserve it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you all think? Is this (racism in LCPS) as rampant as the article portrays? Is FCPS any better? Were the consequences fair to the girl?

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/12/26/us/mimi-groves-jimmy-galligan-racial-slurs.html

Wish there wasn't a pay wall

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread illuminates how this girl came to think what she did is ok. She was raised by people like many of the posters here. Be careful it's not your child next. And if it is, they deserve it.

This post illustrates how many virtue-signaling idiots are running amok in our country right now. They will be the first to lawyer up in a hurry and deny, deny, deny when it's their kid who gets into trouble for doing something stupid with a less than fully developed frontal cortex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread illuminates how this girl came to think what she did is ok. She was raised by people like many of the posters here. Be careful it's not your child next. And if it is, they deserve it.

Spot on. So much work remains wrt combatting racism and privilege.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread illuminates how this girl came to think what she did is ok. She was raised by people like many of the posters here. Be careful it's not your child next. And if it is, they deserve it.

Spot on. So much work remains wrt combatting racism and privilege.

People are going to teach their kids not to say the n-word and never engage with aggrieved POC. Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread illuminates how this girl came to think what she did is ok. She was raised by people like many of the posters here. Be careful it's not your child next. And if it is, they deserve it.

Spot on. So much work remains wrt combatting racism and privilege.

People are going to teach their kids not to say the n-word and never engage with aggrieved POC. Problem solved.

Whatever works for you KKKaren! God speed!

[Anonymous]

Waaa! My kid can't say the n-word at 15 and get away with it. Life is so hard!