SAHMs with no retirement or college savings

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was like this. It was really annoying. They then refused to pay for college but I had to pick up their tab due to the expected family contribution and due to my dad's income, I could not get grants. My dad was not loaded but had enough that I was not grant eligible. I took out private loans at 9% and had 70k in debt from undergrad in 1999.

It really derailed my adult life. I did okay but I could have done better if I did not have that debt because I felt I could not consider professional school. It took all the joy out of my 20s...I worked 3 jobs until 33 to pay it off.

I felt my mom was lazy and had no excuse.

I will never every do that to my kids.

I work full time and have since they were born.

Wait.. YOU picked up THEIR tab? Entitled much?

Yes. I picked up their tab. It is called an expected family contribution. Everyone has this. If your parents make no money, their expectation is $0. My parents had a little so there was no grants for me. I could get some stafford loans but that did not cover the cost of education at even a public school. I went to a private school that was cheaper than public due to a scholarship. I still had the deficit is what the federal govt. says my parents should pay. I could not say they would not pay and redo my financial aid package. I tried. Every student has an EFC. Most kids do not have to go to the bank to take out private loans because their parents refuse to pay. I was not eligible for more aid. It was their tab, according to the government. If my parents were low-income, I could have gotten pell grants and other grants to cover the cost. You do not understand financial aid. The kicker was that I got into a different college that gave me more scholarship money and they refused to let me go there, and then they stopped paying. Transferring would not work because I did not take that scholarship because it had expired because I did not enroll as a freshman. Having to get a 9% loan to cover the cost of what the federal government said they would contribute and would not give me more aid was their tab. Ballooning to 70k in 1999 was unheard of. That is what happens with private loans. Get off my case. They insisted on college and screwed me.

I’m so sorry OP! You still sound angry. I wish you luck.

Of course I am angry. It changed the trajectory of my life and limited me from pursuing professional school (law or medicine). I had too much debt. I could not consider more. I had a $800 student loan payment at 21 with a BA. I barely speak to my parents now. I will never, ever do that to my kids (and the reason they cut me off...they are racist and found out about my boyfriend). This is not a forgivable thing. My kids are are on track to have college paid for.

Girl, it's not your parents fault you took out all that money. Tuition at University of Maryland was $3,500 per year in 1995. You could have gone to a community college for much less. Having $70k of student debt in the 90s from just undergrad is no one's fault but your own. Like, you'd specifically have to TRY to have that much debt. Grow up.

Aha and plenty of people do NOVA online at $1000 per 3 credits now and get employed by big companies. Then go get their masters at Ivy with earned income. Google founder went to UMD. I don't get it either

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was like this. It was really annoying. They then refused to pay for college but I had to pick up their tab due to the expected family contribution and due to my dad's income, I could not get grants. My dad was not loaded but had enough that I was not grant eligible. I took out private loans at 9% and had 70k in debt from undergrad in 1999.

It really derailed my adult life. I did okay but I could have done better if I did not have that debt because I felt I could not consider professional school. It took all the joy out of my 20s...I worked 3 jobs until 33 to pay it off.

I felt my mom was lazy and had no excuse.

I will never every do that to my kids.

I work full time and have since they were born.

Wait.. YOU picked up THEIR tab? Entitled much?

Yes. I picked up their tab. It is called an expected family contribution. Everyone has this. If your parents make no money, their expectation is $0. My parents had a little so there was no grants for me. I could get some stafford loans but that did not cover the cost of education at even a public school. I went to a private school that was cheaper than public due to a scholarship. I still had the deficit is what the federal govt. says my parents should pay. I could not say they would not pay and redo my financial aid package. I tried. Every student has an EFC. Most kids do not have to go to the bank to take out private loans because their parents refuse to pay. I was not eligible for more aid. It was their tab, according to the government. If my parents were low-income, I could have gotten pell grants and other grants to cover the cost. You do not understand financial aid. The kicker was that I got into a different college that gave me more scholarship money and they refused to let me go there, and then they stopped paying. Transferring would not work because I did not take that scholarship because it had expired because I did not enroll as a freshman. Having to get a 9% loan to cover the cost of what the federal government said they would contribute and would not give me more aid was their tab. Ballooning to 70k in 1999 was unheard of. That is what happens with private loans. Get off my case. They insisted on college and screwed me.

I’m so sorry OP! You still sound angry. I wish you luck.

Of course I am angry. It changed the trajectory of my life and limited me from pursuing professional school (law or medicine). I had too much debt. I could not consider more. I had a $800 student loan payment at 21 with a BA. I barely speak to my parents now. I will never, ever do that to my kids (and the reason they cut me off...they are racist and found out about my boyfriend). This is not a forgivable thing. My kids are are on track to have college paid for.

Girl, it's not your parents fault you took out all that money. Tuition at University of Maryland was $3,500 per year in 1995. You could have gone to a community college for much less. Having $70k of student debt in the 90s from just undergrad is no one's fault but your own. Like, you'd specifically have to TRY to have that much debt. Grow up.

Yeah, I don't get this. If your private school was cheaper than state school, and this happened in the 90s, how in the hell did you manage to need to take out $70k in loans? COA of state schools in the 90s was $10k at most. What happened?!

9% interest loans …I did not take out 70k. I took out about 40. State was not cheaper….I had to pay room and board as well as tuition. You do not understand how financial aid works for people whose parents’ income does not allow eligibility for grants.

And adding to this….

Tuition at my institution in 96, 97, 98 was $16,630, $17,635, and $18,525.

Room and board was $10,000 ish.

My academic scholarship covered about 75% of tuition. That made it equal or less that a state school. I went to the nearby financial aid office and they told me point blank transferring was not cheaper and 1 year of credits would not transfer so I would pay more ultimately.

My parents EFC was 12k a year. That means I could only get a small part covered with Stafford loans no matter where I attended. I had to go to chase bank to take out private loans for 6 semesters at 9 percent. Interest accrued immediately while I was in college: it ballooned to about 70k in 1999.

I graduated a semester early finding a loophole to take 24 credits in one semester to save money. I was working 30 hours a week.

Eff off.

what state? There aren't many state universities *2022* where tuition is $16k, let alone in 1996..so....yea, no, you're lying.

Can you read? I went to a private college. I had an academic scholarship that paid 75% of my tuition which was almost the same as the public university nearby. I still had to take our loans for room and board. That is not free.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was like this. It was really annoying. They then refused to pay for college but I had to pick up their tab due to the expected family contribution and due to my dad's income, I could not get grants. My dad was not loaded but had enough that I was not grant eligible. I took out private loans at 9% and had 70k in debt from undergrad in 1999.

It really derailed my adult life. I did okay but I could have done better if I did not have that debt because I felt I could not consider professional school. It took all the joy out of my 20s...I worked 3 jobs until 33 to pay it off.

I felt my mom was lazy and had no excuse.

I will never every do that to my kids.

I work full time and have since they were born.

Wait.. YOU picked up THEIR tab? Entitled much?

Yes. I picked up their tab. It is called an expected family contribution. Everyone has this. If your parents make no money, their expectation is $0. My parents had a little so there was no grants for me. I could get some stafford loans but that did not cover the cost of education at even a public school. I went to a private school that was cheaper than public due to a scholarship. I still had the deficit is what the federal govt. says my parents should pay. I could not say they would not pay and redo my financial aid package. I tried. Every student has an EFC. Most kids do not have to go to the bank to take out private loans because their parents refuse to pay. I was not eligible for more aid. It was their tab, according to the government. If my parents were low-income, I could have gotten pell grants and other grants to cover the cost. You do not understand financial aid. The kicker was that I got into a different college that gave me more scholarship money and they refused to let me go there, and then they stopped paying. Transferring would not work because I did not take that scholarship because it had expired because I did not enroll as a freshman. Having to get a 9% loan to cover the cost of what the federal government said they would contribute and would not give me more aid was their tab. Ballooning to 70k in 1999 was unheard of. That is what happens with private loans. Get off my case. They insisted on college and screwed me.

I’m so sorry OP! You still sound angry. I wish you luck.

Of course I am angry. It changed the trajectory of my life and limited me from pursuing professional school (law or medicine). I had too much debt. I could not consider more. I had a $800 student loan payment at 21 with a BA. I barely speak to my parents now. I will never, ever do that to my kids (and the reason they cut me off...they are racist and found out about my boyfriend). This is not a forgivable thing. My kids are are on track to have college paid for.

Girl, it's not your parents fault you took out all that money. Tuition at University of Maryland was $3,500 per year in 1995. You could have gone to a community college for much less. Having $70k of student debt in the 90s from just undergrad is no one's fault but your own. Like, you'd specifically have to TRY to have that much debt. Grow up.

Aha and plenty of people do NOVA online at $1000 per 3 credits now and get employed by big companies. Then go get their masters at Ivy with earned income. Google founder went to UMD. I don't get it either

There was no online education in 1995 to 1999 and I know this because I developed online courses when they started in 2004 and you’re still not understanding than expected family contribution is the same figure whether you go to a private school or a public school which is why they encourage families to apply for private schools because in many many cases it is actually cheaper than a public institution if you get a scholarship but that doesn’t usually include the cost of room and board that you were paying for even if you go to a public school ! Clearly none of you understand how college financial aid works or you had your parents pay so you don’t understand or your parents had no money so you were getting everything in grants and didn’t have to take out loans regardless most students do not have to take out private loans because they’re able to get federal loans based on their parents income. You are failing to understand that I could not get with other students could get because my parents made too much money and they are expected to pay a certain amount so I had to cover the cost it does not matter if the institution was public or private and like I said my private cost was cheaper than transferring to a public institution or I would’ve had to go to school longer due to lost credits and the tuition was virtually the same because of a scholarship. But it did not cover everything which is why I had to get private loans. If there are typos it’s because I’m talking into my phone and I’m not actually typing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was like this. It was really annoying. They then refused to pay for college but I had to pick up their tab due to the expected family contribution and due to my dad's income, I could not get grants. My dad was not loaded but had enough that I was not grant eligible. I took out private loans at 9% and had 70k in debt from undergrad in 1999.

It really derailed my adult life. I did okay but I could have done better if I did not have that debt because I felt I could not consider professional school. It took all the joy out of my 20s...I worked 3 jobs until 33 to pay it off.

I felt my mom was lazy and had no excuse.

I will never every do that to my kids.

I work full time and have since they were born.

Wait.. YOU picked up THEIR tab? Entitled much?

Yes. I picked up their tab. It is called an expected family contribution. Everyone has this. If your parents make no money, their expectation is $0. My parents had a little so there was no grants for me. I could get some stafford loans but that did not cover the cost of education at even a public school. I went to a private school that was cheaper than public due to a scholarship. I still had the deficit is what the federal govt. says my parents should pay. I could not say they would not pay and redo my financial aid package. I tried. Every student has an EFC. Most kids do not have to go to the bank to take out private loans because their parents refuse to pay. I was not eligible for more aid. It was their tab, according to the government. If my parents were low-income, I could have gotten pell grants and other grants to cover the cost. You do not understand financial aid. The kicker was that I got into a different college that gave me more scholarship money and they refused to let me go there, and then they stopped paying. Transferring would not work because I did not take that scholarship because it had expired because I did not enroll as a freshman. Having to get a 9% loan to cover the cost of what the federal government said they would contribute and would not give me more aid was their tab. Ballooning to 70k in 1999 was unheard of. That is what happens with private loans. Get off my case. They insisted on college and screwed me.

I’m so sorry OP! You still sound angry. I wish you luck.

Of course I am angry. It changed the trajectory of my life and limited me from pursuing professional school (law or medicine). I had too much debt. I could not consider more. I had a $800 student loan payment at 21 with a BA. I barely speak to my parents now. I will never, ever do that to my kids (and the reason they cut me off...they are racist and found out about my boyfriend). This is not a forgivable thing. My kids are are on track to have college paid for.

Girl, it's not your parents fault you took out all that money. Tuition at University of Maryland was $3,500 per year in 1995. You could have gone to a community college for much less. Having $70k of student debt in the 90s from just undergrad is no one's fault but your own. Like, you'd specifically have to TRY to have that much debt. Grow up.

Yeah, I don't get this. If your private school was cheaper than state school, and this happened in the 90s, how in the hell did you manage to need to take out $70k in loans? COA of state schools in the 90s was $10k at most. What happened?!

9% interest loans …I did not take out 70k. I took out about 40. State was not cheaper….I had to pay room and board as well as tuition. You do not understand how financial aid works for people whose parents’ income does not allow eligibility for grants.

And adding to this….

Tuition at my institution in 96, 97, 98 was $16,630, $17,635, and $18,525.

Room and board was $10,000 ish.

My academic scholarship covered about 75% of tuition. That made it equal or less that a state school. I went to the nearby financial aid office and they told me point blank transferring was not cheaper and 1 year of credits would not transfer so I would pay more ultimately.

My parents EFC was 12k a year. That means I could only get a small part covered with Stafford loans no matter where I attended. I had to go to chase bank to take out private loans for 6 semesters at 9 percent. Interest accrued immediately while I was in college: it ballooned to about 70k in 1999.

I graduated a semester early finding a loophole to take 24 credits in one semester to save money. I was working 30 hours a week.

Eff off.

Name the school. I don't believe you.

Tuition History
Year Tuition Annual Increase
1999 $19,565 5.6%
1998 $18,525 5%
1997 $17,635 6%
1996 $16,630 6.7%
22 more rows
https://www.collegecalc.org › colleges
Tuition, net price and cost to go Goucher College - CollegeCalc

[Anonymous]

And

Here’s a primer about how the expected family contribution works in the United States from the Wikipedia page so you can better understand what I’m talking about:

In the post-secondary education system of the United States, an expected family contribution (EFC) is an estimate of a student's, and for a dependent student, their parent(s)' or guardian(s)', ability to pay the costs of a year of post-secondary education. The EFC is used in the United States student financial aid process to determine an applicant's eligibility for need-based federal student aid. In most cases, the same estimate is also used for state and institutional (college-based) financial aid. The EFC is included on the Student Aid Report and Institutional Student Information Record, which are sent after filing a form called a Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA).[1]

A common misconception is that the EFC is a statement of what the family actually will pay. This is usually not the case, and many families pay more, sometimes much more, than the EFC.[citation needed] The college's costs, minus the EFC, gives the student's financial need. Most four-year colleges do not have enough financial aid to meet students' needs, and as a result, the unmet need must be paid by the parents, in addition to the EFC. The federal government offers unsubsidized Stafford Loans, which are available to any family regardless of need, as a source of funds to cover the unmet need.

In cases in which a student qualifies for merit-based (rather than need-based) financial aid, the student and their family may pay less than the EFC.

A well-to-do family's EFC may exceed the cost of attendance at a school, and in that case the student does not have financial need, as defined by the federal financial aid system.

In some cases, despite financial hardship for the student, the student's family will simply be unwilling to pay the full amount, leaving the student to find their own way to finance their college education, or forgo it.[6]

See that last bit? That is why I had to take out private loans. Public university was not cheaper due to my partial scholarship. Most students can get financial aid with grants or cover the rest with federal loans. I could not.

[Anonymous]

Wow. My miserly dad wouldn't pay anything more but the cheapest 4-year college I could get into, the cheapest housing available (three to one bedroom in a really old building), and barely enough to live off of. But he paid! I didn't take out loans until law school. Education was very important to him and I'm so grateful for that.

But he didn't save for it, he just used his income. With colleges costs what they are now and with our HHI I am definitely saving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow. My miserly dad wouldn't pay anything more but the cheapest 4-year college I could get into, the cheapest housing available (three to one bedroom in a really old building), and barely enough to live off of. But he paid! I didn't take out loans until law school. Education was very important to him and I'm so grateful for that.

But he didn't save for it, he just used his income. With colleges costs what they are now and with our HHI I am definitely saving.

And I call him miserly for other reasons, like how he makes high six figures and we stayed in Fairfield inns, made us do back-to school shopping at Goodwill, never ate out, etc. I guess I should call him a penny-pincher instead of miserly. He's generous when things are important to him.

[Anonymous]

My dad used my college savings on women and Thomas Kincade paintings. I had to leave the OOS university I attended after year one and enrolled in a community college, then local four-year university. Had loans afterward. Won't put my kids through that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was like this. It was really annoying. They then refused to pay for college but I had to pick up their tab due to the expected family contribution and due to my dad's income, I could not get grants. My dad was not loaded but had enough that I was not grant eligible. I took out private loans at 9% and had 70k in debt from undergrad in 1999.

It really derailed my adult life. I did okay but I could have done better if I did not have that debt because I felt I could not consider professional school. It took all the joy out of my 20s...I worked 3 jobs until 33 to pay it off.

I felt my mom was lazy and had no excuse.

I will never every do that to my kids.

I work full time and have since they were born.

Wait.. YOU picked up THEIR tab? Entitled much?

Yes. I picked up their tab. It is called an expected family contribution. Everyone has this. If your parents make no money, their expectation is $0. My parents had a little so there was no grants for me. I could get some stafford loans but that did not cover the cost of education at even a public school. I went to a private school that was cheaper than public due to a scholarship. I still had the deficit is what the federal govt. says my parents should pay. I could not say they would not pay and redo my financial aid package. I tried. Every student has an EFC. Most kids do not have to go to the bank to take out private loans because their parents refuse to pay. I was not eligible for more aid. It was their tab, according to the government. If my parents were low-income, I could have gotten pell grants and other grants to cover the cost. You do not understand financial aid. The kicker was that I got into a different college that gave me more scholarship money and they refused to let me go there, and then they stopped paying. Transferring would not work because I did not take that scholarship because it had expired because I did not enroll as a freshman. Having to get a 9% loan to cover the cost of what the federal government said they would contribute and would not give me more aid was their tab. Ballooning to 70k in 1999 was unheard of. That is what happens with private loans. Get off my case. They insisted on college and screwed me.

I’m so sorry OP! You still sound angry. I wish you luck.

Of course I am angry. It changed the trajectory of my life and limited me from pursuing professional school (law or medicine). I had too much debt. I could not consider more. I had a $800 student loan payment at 21 with a BA. I barely speak to my parents now. I will never, ever do that to my kids (and the reason they cut me off...they are racist and found out about my boyfriend). This is not a forgivable thing. My kids are are on track to have college paid for.

Girl, it's not your parents fault you took out all that money. Tuition at University of Maryland was $3,500 per year in 1995. You could have gone to a community college for much less. Having $70k of student debt in the 90s from just undergrad is no one's fault but your own. Like, you'd specifically have to TRY to have that much debt. Grow up.

Aha and plenty of people do NOVA online at $1000 per 3 credits now and get employed by big companies. Then go get their masters at Ivy with earned income. Google founder went to UMD. I don't get it either

There was no online education in 1995 to 1999 and I know this because I developed online courses when they started in 2004 and you’re still not understanding than expected family contribution is the same figure whether you go to a private school or a public school which is why they encourage families to apply for private schools because in many many cases it is actually cheaper than a public institution if you get a scholarship but that doesn’t usually include the cost of room and board that you were paying for even if you go to a public school ! Clearly none of you understand how college financial aid works or you had your parents pay so you don’t understand or your parents had no money so you were getting everything in grants and didn’t have to take out loans regardless most students do not have to take out private loans because they’re able to get federal loans based on their parents income. You are failing to understand that I could not get with other students could get because my parents made too much money and they are expected to pay a certain amount so I had to cover the cost it does not matter if the institution was public or private and like I said my private cost was cheaper than transferring to a public institution or I would’ve had to go to school longer due to lost credits and the tuition was virtually the same because of a scholarship. But it did not cover everything which is why I had to get private loans. If there are typos it’s because I’m talking into my phone and I’m not actually typing.

You could still attend George Mason or Nova, then find a job and attend a grand program in parallel. All my foreign born piers/first generation immigrants did this and got masters with zero debt. They did live with families thus had zero living expenses. There were community colleges already back then

Could you have stayed at parents' home attending a community college? Did they kick you out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And

Here’s a primer about how the expected family contribution works in the United States from the Wikipedia page so you can better understand what I’m talking about:

In the post-secondary education system of the United States, an expected family contribution (EFC) is an estimate of a student's, and for a dependent student, their parent(s)' or guardian(s)', ability to pay the costs of a year of post-secondary education. The EFC is used in the United States student financial aid process to determine an applicant's eligibility for need-based federal student aid. In most cases, the same estimate is also used for state and institutional (college-based) financial aid. The EFC is included on the Student Aid Report and Institutional Student Information Record, which are sent after filing a form called a Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA).[1]

A common misconception is that the EFC is a statement of what the family actually will pay. This is usually not the case, and many families pay more, sometimes much more, than the EFC.[citation needed] The college's costs, minus the EFC, gives the student's financial need. Most four-year colleges do not have enough financial aid to meet students' needs, and as a result, the unmet need must be paid by the parents, in addition to the EFC. The federal government offers unsubsidized Stafford Loans, which are available to any family regardless of need, as a source of funds to cover the unmet need.

In cases in which a student qualifies for merit-based (rather than need-based) financial aid, the student and their family may pay less than the EFC.

A well-to-do family's EFC may exceed the cost of attendance at a school, and in that case the student does not have financial need, as defined by the federal financial aid system.

In some cases, despite financial hardship for the student, the student's family will simply be unwilling to pay the full amount, leaving the student to find their own way to finance their college education, or forgo it.[6]

See that last bit? That is why I had to take out private loans. Public university was not cheaper due to my partial scholarship. Most students can get financial aid with grants or cover the rest with federal loans. I could not.

I see that but this is the law in the US. Parents are not required to pay for your college. Thus it's considered normal and ethical for this country for people start relying only on themselves. They say "not everyone goes to college" when families divorce, for example. The court will include into CS calculation only the cheapest community college annual tuition.

In Germany for example parents are required to provide the same level of education as they have. It's not necessarily I think the US system is fair, but this is what is determined by the most population in this country

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And

Here’s a primer about how the expected family contribution works in the United States from the Wikipedia page so you can better understand what I’m talking about:

In the post-secondary education system of the United States, an expected family contribution (EFC) is an estimate of a student's, and for a dependent student, their parent(s)' or guardian(s)', ability to pay the costs of a year of post-secondary education. The EFC is used in the United States student financial aid process to determine an applicant's eligibility for need-based federal student aid. In most cases, the same estimate is also used for state and institutional (college-based) financial aid. The EFC is included on the Student Aid Report and Institutional Student Information Record, which are sent after filing a form called a Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA).[1]

A common misconception is that the EFC is a statement of what the family actually will pay. This is usually not the case, and many families pay more, sometimes much more, than the EFC.[citation needed] The college's costs, minus the EFC, gives the student's financial need. Most four-year colleges do not have enough financial aid to meet students' needs, and as a result, the unmet need must be paid by the parents, in addition to the EFC. The federal government offers unsubsidized Stafford Loans, which are available to any family regardless of need, as a source of funds to cover the unmet need.

In cases in which a student qualifies for merit-based (rather than need-based) financial aid, the student and their family may pay less than the EFC.

A well-to-do family's EFC may exceed the cost of attendance at a school, and in that case the student does not have financial need, as defined by the federal financial aid system.

In some cases, despite financial hardship for the student, the student's family will simply be unwilling to pay the full amount, leaving the student to find their own way to finance their college education, or forgo it.[6]

See that last bit? That is why I had to take out private loans. Public university was not cheaper due to my partial scholarship. Most students can get financial aid with grants or cover the rest with federal loans. I could not.

I qualified for financial aid but my single parent still had an EFC that they couldn't pay, so I paid it. I worked three jobs the summer before I started college. I worked every semester of college. I didn't have to give up dance because my parents could never afford dance lessons, or for me to join any school teams. I applied only to inexpensive in state schools because debt scared me and I didn't know that I might qualify for significant financial aid elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was like this. It was really annoying. They then refused to pay for college but I had to pick up their tab due to the expected family contribution and due to my dad's income, I could not get grants. My dad was not loaded but had enough that I was not grant eligible. I took out private loans at 9% and had 70k in debt from undergrad in 1999.

It really derailed my adult life. I did okay but I could have done better if I did not have that debt because I felt I could not consider professional school. It took all the joy out of my 20s...I worked 3 jobs until 33 to pay it off.

I felt my mom was lazy and had no excuse.

I will never every do that to my kids.

I work full time and have since they were born.

Wait.. YOU picked up THEIR tab? Entitled much?

Yes. I picked up their tab. It is called an expected family contribution. Everyone has this. If your parents make no money, their expectation is $0. My parents had a little so there was no grants for me. I could get some stafford loans but that did not cover the cost of education at even a public school. I went to a private school that was cheaper than public due to a scholarship. I still had the deficit is what the federal govt. says my parents should pay. I could not say they would not pay and redo my financial aid package. I tried. Every student has an EFC. Most kids do not have to go to the bank to take out private loans because their parents refuse to pay. I was not eligible for more aid. It was their tab, according to the government. If my parents were low-income, I could have gotten pell grants and other grants to cover the cost. You do not understand financial aid. The kicker was that I got into a different college that gave me more scholarship money and they refused to let me go there, and then they stopped paying. Transferring would not work because I did not take that scholarship because it had expired because I did not enroll as a freshman. Having to get a 9% loan to cover the cost of what the federal government said they would contribute and would not give me more aid was their tab. Ballooning to 70k in 1999 was unheard of. That is what happens with private loans. Get off my case. They insisted on college and screwed me.

I’m so sorry OP! You still sound angry. I wish you luck.

Of course I am angry. It changed the trajectory of my life and limited me from pursuing professional school (law or medicine). I had too much debt. I could not consider more. I had a $800 student loan payment at 21 with a BA. I barely speak to my parents now. I will never, ever do that to my kids (and the reason they cut me off...they are racist and found out about my boyfriend). This is not a forgivable thing. My kids are are on track to have college paid for.

Girl, it's not your parents fault you took out all that money. Tuition at University of Maryland was $3,500 per year in 1995. You could have gone to a community college for much less. Having $70k of student debt in the 90s from just undergrad is no one's fault but your own. Like, you'd specifically have to TRY to have that much debt. Grow up.

Yeah, I don't get this. If your private school was cheaper than state school, and this happened in the 90s, how in the hell did you manage to need to take out $70k in loans? COA of state schools in the 90s was $10k at most. What happened?!

9% interest loans …I did not take out 70k. I took out about 40. State was not cheaper….I had to pay room and board as well as tuition. You do not understand how financial aid works for people whose parents’ income does not allow eligibility for grants.

And adding to this….

Tuition at my institution in 96, 97, 98 was $16,630, $17,635, and $18,525.

Room and board was $10,000 ish.

My academic scholarship covered about 75% of tuition. That made it equal or less that a state school. I went to the nearby financial aid office and they told me point blank transferring was not cheaper and 1 year of credits would not transfer so I would pay more ultimately.

My parents EFC was 12k a year. That means I could only get a small part covered with Stafford loans no matter where I attended. I had to go to chase bank to take out private loans for 6 semesters at 9 percent. Interest accrued immediately while I was in college: it ballooned to about 70k in 1999.

I graduated a semester early finding a loophole to take 24 credits in one semester to save money. I was working 30 hours a week.

Eff off.

what state? There aren't many state universities *2022* where tuition is $16k, let alone in 1996..so....yea, no, you're lying.

Can you read? I went to a private college. I had an academic scholarship that paid 75% of my tuition which was almost the same as the public university nearby. I still had to take our loans for room and board. That is not free.

Yes, but there was no public school in the 90s where tuition was anywhere remotely near $16k...so something's not adding up...

[Anonymous]

Can you read? I went to a private college. I had an academic scholarship that paid 75% of my tuition which was almost the same as the public university nearby. I still had to take our loans for room and board. That is not free.

PP - I get that your parents didn't contribute their EFC and that you had a scholarship that accounted for 75% of the tuition... so you paid between $4 and $5K per year for your tuition. If you took out 40k in loans, that means that you took out another ~$5-6k per year for room and board. Did you work during the summers? I had summer internships in the 90s that paid me ~3k per summer. I also worked during the school year earning roughly that over the academic calendar. Not enough to cover everything, but it made a dent. I also lived in some pretty cruddy apartments with roommates because it was ~1/2 the price of campus room and board. I'm not blaming you, PP, but you ALSO had choices that you didn't make.

[Anonymous]

Maybe she can't work due to physical/mental health problems. Maybe she has an aging/dying parent. Maybe she has wealthy family members who have already offered to pay for college for her kids.

I really doubt that she is just deciding not to work for no reason, despite living paycheck to paycheck.

[Anonymous]

In NY all State Universities charge zero tuition for families making under $125k

Over $125k annual tuition is $7,100.

Of course room and board and fees not covered 16k

My friend on Long Island Daughter living at home first two years going to SUNY Farmington on Long Island for free then to SUNY Albany last two years room and board only $16k a year.

And that is with zero financial aid. If he gets that even less