Why have a baby when your 40?

[Anonymous]

In ye days of olde, when people had much larger families, women regularly had their final child in their 40s. Pregnancy at this age is not abnormal at all from a biological perspective. If you were healthy enough to pump out 8 kids, you were healthy enough to keep pumping them out for decades.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can people explain this to me please, I realize I'm being ignorant and probably will trigger the old farts on this forum. But why? Why not adopt? Do you really want to be 60 when your child is 20? 70 at 30? Women who have babies in their 40s really grosses me out.

I understand the economic and cultural differences for waiting to be older, but biologically you are at menopause age.

You're an idiot and a fool. 40 is not menopause age. Many people menstruate well into their 50s.

MYOB

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can people explain this to me please, I realize I'm being ignorant and probably will trigger the old farts on this forum. But why? Why not adopt? Do you really want to be 60 when your child is 20? 70 at 30? Women who have babies in their 40s really grosses me out.

I understand the economic and cultural differences for waiting to be older, but biologically you are at menopause age.

So if you adopt at 40 you will still be 50 when the kid is 20. That logic makes zero sense.

Also...menopause kicks in primarily at 50, not 40.

Lastly, women naturally have the ability to keep having kids until they cannot. That is why in previous generations prior to birth control family sizes were larger. Many women would have kids over a span of three decades, from their late teens until their mid 40s...and this was natural.

There are plenty of unhealthy teens, 20s and 30s who eat poorly and are overweight who choose to have a baby. What is the woman is 40 and super fit...she is just if not more qualified to have a baby and raise them setting a great example.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can people explain this to me please, I realize I'm being ignorant and probably will trigger the old farts on this forum. But why? Why not adopt? Do you really want to be 60 when your child is 20? 70 at 30? Women who have babies in their 40s really grosses me out.

I understand the economic and cultural differences for waiting to be older, but biologically you are at menopause age.

You cant be serious. Seriously get a life and find something else to think about haha.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can people explain this to me please, I realize I'm being ignorant and probably will trigger the old farts on this forum. But why? Why not adopt? Do you really want to be 60 when your child is 20? 70 at 30? Women who have babies in their 40s really grosses me out.

I understand the economic and cultural differences for waiting to be older, but biologically you are at menopause age.

My mom had me at 40 and is now 75 and is totally healthy and looks 60! Considering how ignorant you sound I'm assuming that probably wont be the case for you. Also its hilarious that you think 40 is old.

[Anonymous]

I know this is an old thread but I really wish I knew the age of OP.

[Anonymous]

You sound so stupid. Having a kid in your 20s sucks for the most part.

[Anonymous]

There is a lot to parenting than just age. We waited many years before getting pregnant because we were mentally and emotionally not a good place to have a kid. Things are much better now, we are more stable and we feel like we are having the kid for the right reasons rather than just because we are the age when we must.

[Anonymous]

who still has kids in their 20s? Let me guess. Thats you.

[Anonymous]

Whoops. We did it? (Again)

[Anonymous]

When I was in my 20s there was a news story about a woman having children via some new method (sorry, don't remember what it was) in her mid to late 40s. I was visiting my parents at the time the story came out and my dad had this very visceral, negative reaction. He said it was "disgusting" and "unnatural" and that he felt sorry for children born to older mothers. I told him he was being ridiculous and weirdly judgmental and what business was it of his, but he maintained his position.

Cut to almost 20 years later. I had my first baby in my late 30s and am contemplating a second in my early 40s. I feel like becoming a mother at this age is keeping me young -- I spend most of my time running after a toddler and while it's exhausting, it's also enormously rewarding. I feel like I have so much to offer my child in large part because I lived a very full and varied life before having a baby. I sometimes laugh that all the odd jobs of my somewhat meandering career seemed random at the time, but are now exactly what I need to be a great mom. And I so look forward to being present for my kids as they grow older and become adults. I know I don't have the luxury of time or assuming I'll be around for grandchildren or other major events in my children's lives. So instead I focus on making sure the time we have is meaningful. And I take great care of myself because I want to make sure my kids have me around as long as they need me.

Meanwhile, my parents had their children very young (19 and 21) and by the time they were my age, they were already old. They were in their 20s and early 30s when their kids were young, and yet most of my memories of my childhood are of my parents complaining about us, saying no to everything, clearly unhappy with their lives.

I don't think you have to wait to have kids, but I think parents who make the affirmative choice to have children later in life are often some of the best parents. I feel sorry for my dad and others who don't understand that parenthood is a gift and that, like many such gifts, it is often wasted on those who least appreciate it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can people explain this to me please, I realize I'm being ignorant and probably will trigger the old farts on this forum. But why? Why not adopt? Do you really want to be 60 when your child is 20? 70 at 30? Women who have babies in their 40s really grosses me out.

I understand the economic and cultural differences for waiting to be older, but biologically you are at menopause age.

It’s good that you recognize your limitations. Why do you feel the need to spew your ignorance when you know for a fact that you are ignorant? Did you not get enough attention today?

I'm just asking. Besides a handful of reasons I got responses on a) my grammar and a bunch of pearl clutching responses. None of which explain why you chose to have a baby at such an old age.

Well, you got plenty of substantive responses.

Why do you want to know? Why do you care? Why does it gross you out? Do 25-yr-old pregnant women gross you out? Why? Why not?

Just asking.

And you need to look up the meaning of “pearl-clutching”.

I want to know because there seems to be quite a few women in this area who are old with young children.

I care because I'm trying to understand why you would want to have a toddler while "approaching" menopause. Pardon my previous posts that offended users.

It grosses me out because you're old. I get you are offended by that but you can't change your biological clock nor what you look like. You're 55 while your teenager is throwing a temper tantrum because you're taking too long to receive your 10% discount for being a senior?

No, 25 doesn't gross me out because that's an appropriate child rearing age.

Anyone offended by my question just is insecure with themselves for having children later in life.

OP, you just keep digging yourself deeper. Do yourself a favor and go rice your scooter to Larla’s house for some popsicles. Get back to us when you hit 35.

[Anonymous]

I'll try to meet you on your level. I had my kids in my late thirties because I was hotter in my 20s and sleeping around and living it up and didn't want to be bogged down with a family. The guys I was into would have made terrible fathers (at least at the time). Because I matured a lot as my twenties passed and the man I ended up with in my mid 30s loves me for me and not solely my physical attributes and I have zero insecurity around how pregnancy changed my body. I'm a better person in my thirties and forties than I was in my twenties, and a much better mom with values I'd like to pass on to my kids. Parenting in my twenties would have meant financial instability and emotional instability. Neither of which is "gross", but neither of which is preferable over a mom who may have lost her "hotness" but gained some sense.

[Anonymous]

Theory: The OP is their 20s. Their mother is now newly pregnant. ( Perhaps with a new partner). The OP is disgusted or resentful because of the new relationship and new family dynamics.

I had my children in my 20s.
It was a great decision for me; I am an RN and had a very steady income right off the bat.
I love that I will be in my 40s when my kids are adults.

The average age of menopause amongst White women is 52.4 and 55 for Black women plus or minus 5-7 years.

Please don’t feed the troll.
Troll congrats on your new brother or sister.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wrong forum OP. This town is full of women that would gross you out. The average age of a FTM on this forum is likely 36+

Yep and the HHI to go with it. I dunno I make high six figure salary bc I was busy building a career in my 20s and 30s. What do you earn OP?