For those of you whose parents divorced when you were 20+, if one of your parents started a second

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Always feel relieved that my husband and I both agreed to get fixed when we had our last kid. No matter what happens our kids will not be second fiddle.

My spouse and I agree our two kids are the only ones we want. And it’s laughable to us the men that start an entirely family once their first set of kids reach college. Ohmygod hell no! We are 3 years to empty nest and have all kinds of trips and fun plans lined up. He also got a vasectomy.

Blended family drama - no thanks. And having to go back to preschool, and teacher conferences and kids sports and busy weekends and worry …no way!

So, you think its ok women move on and get remarried and have more kids but men should just stay divorced and hand over their entire check to their ex?

Not to their ex, to their kids. The kids should not have their dads estate diluted by your kids.

No one is entitled to inheritance.

Exactly why the 2nd wife should not expect to get it.

Who says we want it?

Good we agree, you should not get it.

You should also start working stop collecting alimony and start saving for your kids inheritance. Instead of using men as a pay check

I actually have always made more money than my ex. Our money is in a trust and my ex can’t get it out without my say so.

I don’t think he’s stupid enough to take on a dependent 2nd wife.

I suspect if he’s stupid enough to remarry she wouldn’t be a slug who expected money from my family trust.

Good God! Second wives are slugs are they lol i have a career and don't take a dime from DH.
Seems to me from this thread these poor men WERE
Married to 'slugs' and now their baby slugs are crying about inheritance

Glad we agree his inheritance goes to his kids when he dies since you are not a slug and you don’t need it.

Exactly goes to all kids...not just your greedy baby slugs crying about daddy's money

You and he can create an inheritance if you want for your slug. My kids get all the money in our trust during our marriage.

Come on slug I had him during the low earning years… you can do this without your slug getting our money.

There was no money during the marriage. If she wanted his money, she shouldn't have cheated and stayed married to him. Simple.

This

We aren’t talking about ex cheating wives.

We are talking about his kids.

Do you punish the kids because she cheated? Nice

You aren't punishing kids by not leaving them an inheritance. Maybe all the money is the new wife's. Ever consider that?

You are not entitled to an inhertance.

And, yes, cheating wives has a huge impact.

We aren’t talking about the new wife’s money we are talking about the dad’s inheritance.

2nd wives can have a more negative impact, don’t be that person.

You understand that some marriages are long-term. We have been married for twice as long as he was married to his ex now so our money in mixed. There is no his/my money and its our money. We only kept our money separate when he paid child support as his ex filed in court expecting me to pay her child support (thankfully the judge threw that demand out).

So, what you are saying is I could be married for 40 years to my husband but the day he dies, 100% of our money should go to his kids, and not me and our kids. Sure, ok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make your own money. Stop relying on daddy for your retirement.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I detest my dad & his second wife. They’re raising their kids in my childhood home. His daughter’s bedroom is mine.

So, what would you prefer they do, sell the house? You think your room should be a shrine?

Your sister you mean??
You are an a*@.
Maybe he got the daughter he wanted

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The greed and entitlement on this thread is so gross. I hope it’s the same poster over and over and not multiple crazy people.

+1. OP, did your father treat you well before you turned 18? Do you want your father to be happy? What do you expect from your father when you are an adult?

Why does their father need to pay a woman to “be happy”?

How do you know this? Even it is the case, it is the father’s life and money. He does what he wants, he does now owe his adult child anything.

This

Ask yourself how you would like your children to be treated, if their father is still alive when they are adults. Ignored in favor of a new family? Would you remarry and have more kids and ignore your older children? I doubt it. But somehow it's okay for your DH to do it to his.

What if the adult kids ignore Dad? What if the mother wouldn't allow a relationship? You think in that situation they should 100% inherit all money? What about the fact his wife also earned a portion of the money? What about the fact that the new marriage lasted far longer than the original one? Sometimes Dads want to be a part of the kids lives but the mom's refuse and will not allow it, even when the kids are adults.

No one is entitled to an inheritance. Even if your parents are married you are not entitled for them to pay for college and inherit.

And, in all honesty, I wouldn't bother telling my husband's "kids" when he passes if I outlive him. My kids wouldn't tell them either. They can figure it out when Mom stops receiving his pension check.

You seem like a real charmer, I can't imagine why they'd avoid spending time with you.

The children are adults now and if their father wishes to rebuild a relationship with them, there is nothing their mother can do to stop him. If your DH doesn't have it in him to do that, I wonder why you chose him to be the father of your children. Remember, how he treats them is how he will treat yours some day.

He treats me very well and treated them very well too. I have no worries. I know why I choose him to be my kids father and he's a great father.

Now, you should talk to the AP's ex-wife. She can tell you lots of stories about his ex-wife. She is far from a nice, good person.

The thread is not about ex’s.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Always feel relieved that my husband and I both agreed to get fixed when we had our last kid. No matter what happens our kids will not be second fiddle.

My spouse and I agree our two kids are the only ones we want. And it’s laughable to us the men that start an entirely family once their first set of kids reach college. Ohmygod hell no! We are 3 years to empty nest and have all kinds of trips and fun plans lined up. He also got a vasectomy.

Blended family drama - no thanks. And having to go back to preschool, and teacher conferences and kids sports and busy weekends and worry …no way!

So, you think its ok women move on and get remarried and have more kids but men should just stay divorced and hand over their entire check to their ex?

Not to their ex, to their kids. The kids should not have their dads estate diluted by your kids.

No one is entitled to inheritance.

Exactly why the 2nd wife should not expect to get it.

Who says we want it?

Good we agree, you should not get it.

You should also start working stop collecting alimony and start saving for your kids inheritance. Instead of using men as a pay check

I actually have always made more money than my ex. Our money is in a trust and my ex can’t get it out without my say so.

I don’t think he’s stupid enough to take on a dependent 2nd wife.

I suspect if he’s stupid enough to remarry she wouldn’t be a slug who expected money from my family trust.

Good God! Second wives are slugs are they lol i have a career and don't take a dime from DH.
Seems to me from this thread these poor men WERE
Married to 'slugs' and now their baby slugs are crying about inheritance

Glad we agree his inheritance goes to his kids when he dies since you are not a slug and you don’t need it.

Exactly goes to all kids...not just your greedy baby slugs crying about daddy's money

You and he can create an inheritance if you want for your slug. My kids get all the money in our trust during our marriage.

Come on slug I had him during the low earning years… you can do this without your slug getting our money.

There was no money during the marriage. If she wanted his money, she shouldn't have cheated and stayed married to him. Simple.

This

We aren’t talking about ex cheating wives.

We are talking about his kids.

Do you punish the kids because she cheated? Nice

You aren't punishing kids by not leaving them an inheritance. Maybe all the money is the new wife's. Ever consider that?

You are not entitled to an inhertance.

And, yes, cheating wives has a huge impact.

We aren’t talking about the new wife’s money we are talking about the dad’s inheritance.

2nd wives can have a more negative impact, don’t be that person.

You understand that some marriages are long-term. We have been married for twice as long as he was married to his ex now so our money in mixed. There is no his/my money and its our money. We only kept our money separate when he paid child support as his ex filed in court expecting me to pay her child support (thankfully the judge threw that demand out).

So, what you are saying is I could be married for 40 years to my husband but the day he dies, 100% of our money should go to his kids, and not me and our kids. Sure, ok.

Thank you again. This is also why I keep my money separate so greedy first wife can't try and claim it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Always feel relieved that my husband and I both agreed to get fixed when we had our last kid. No matter what happens our kids will not be second fiddle.

My spouse and I agree our two kids are the only ones we want. And it’s laughable to us the men that start an entirely family once their first set of kids reach college. Ohmygod hell no! We are 3 years to empty nest and have all kinds of trips and fun plans lined up. He also got a vasectomy.

Blended family drama - no thanks. And having to go back to preschool, and teacher conferences and kids sports and busy weekends and worry …no way!

So, you think its ok women move on and get remarried and have more kids but men should just stay divorced and hand over their entire check to their ex?

Not to their ex, to their kids. The kids should not have their dads estate diluted by your kids.

No one is entitled to inheritance.

Exactly why the 2nd wife should not expect to get it.

Who says we want it?

Good we agree, you should not get it.

You should also start working stop collecting alimony and start saving for your kids inheritance. Instead of using men as a pay check

I actually have always made more money than my ex. Our money is in a trust and my ex can’t get it out without my say so.

I don’t think he’s stupid enough to take on a dependent 2nd wife.

I suspect if he’s stupid enough to remarry she wouldn’t be a slug who expected money from my family trust.

Good God! Second wives are slugs are they lol i have a career and don't take a dime from DH.
Seems to me from this thread these poor men WERE
Married to 'slugs' and now their baby slugs are crying about inheritance

Glad we agree his inheritance goes to his kids when he dies since you are not a slug and you don’t need it.

Exactly goes to all kids...not just your greedy baby slugs crying about daddy's money

You and he can create an inheritance if you want for your slug. My kids get all the money in our trust during our marriage.

Come on slug I had him during the low earning years… you can do this without your slug getting our money.

There was no money during the marriage. If she wanted his money, she shouldn't have cheated and stayed married to him. Simple.

This

We aren’t talking about ex cheating wives.

We are talking about his kids.

Do you punish the kids because she cheated? Nice

You aren't punishing kids by not leaving them an inheritance. Maybe all the money is the new wife's. Ever consider that?

You are not entitled to an inhertance.

And, yes, cheating wives has a huge impact.

We aren’t talking about the new wife’s money we are talking about the dad’s inheritance.

2nd wives can have a more negative impact, don’t be that person.

You understand that some marriages are long-term. We have been married for twice as long as he was married to his ex now so our money in mixed. There is no his/my money and its our money. We only kept our money separate when he paid child support as his ex filed in court expecting me to pay her child support (thankfully the judge threw that demand out).

So, what you are saying is I could be married for 40 years to my husband but the day he dies, 100% of our money should go to his kids, and not me and our kids. Sure, ok.

I hope you’ve thought this through and your accounts and assets are properly titled as joint tenants with rights of survivorship. Or you keep half of the money in an account in only your name.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I detest my dad & his second wife. They’re raising their kids in my childhood home. His daughter’s bedroom is mine.

Your sister you mean??
You are an a*@.
Maybe he got the daughter he wanted

[Anonymous]

So many spoiled grownup kids here. Make your own money, and be happy that your father has a new family! Happy for your father!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Always feel relieved that my husband and I both agreed to get fixed when we had our last kid. No matter what happens our kids will not be second fiddle.

My spouse and I agree our two kids are the only ones we want. And it’s laughable to us the men that start an entirely family once their first set of kids reach college. Ohmygod hell no! We are 3 years to empty nest and have all kinds of trips and fun plans lined up. He also got a vasectomy.

Blended family drama - no thanks. And having to go back to preschool, and teacher conferences and kids sports and busy weekends and worry …no way!

So, you think its ok women move on and get remarried and have more kids but men should just stay divorced and hand over their entire check to their ex?

Not to their ex, to their kids. The kids should not have their dads estate diluted by your kids.

No one is entitled to inheritance.

Exactly why the 2nd wife should not expect to get it.

Who says we want it?

Good we agree, you should not get it.

You should also start working stop collecting alimony and start saving for your kids inheritance. Instead of using men as a pay check

I actually have always made more money than my ex. Our money is in a trust and my ex can’t get it out without my say so.

I don’t think he’s stupid enough to take on a dependent 2nd wife.

I suspect if he’s stupid enough to remarry she wouldn’t be a slug who expected money from my family trust.

Good God! Second wives are slugs are they lol i have a career and don't take a dime from DH.
Seems to me from this thread these poor men WERE
Married to 'slugs' and now their baby slugs are crying about inheritance

Glad we agree his inheritance goes to his kids when he dies since you are not a slug and you don’t need it.

Exactly goes to all kids...not just your greedy baby slugs crying about daddy's money

You and he can create an inheritance if you want for your slug. My kids get all the money in our trust during our marriage.

Come on slug I had him during the low earning years… you can do this without your slug getting our money.

There was no money during the marriage. If she wanted his money, she shouldn't have cheated and stayed married to him. Simple.

This

We aren’t talking about ex cheating wives.

We are talking about his kids.

Do you punish the kids because she cheated? Nice

You aren't punishing kids by not leaving them an inheritance. Maybe all the money is the new wife's. Ever consider that?

You are not entitled to an inhertance.

And, yes, cheating wives has a huge impact.

We aren’t talking about the new wife’s money we are talking about the dad’s inheritance.

2nd wives can have a more negative impact, don’t be that person.

You understand that some marriages are long-term. We have been married for twice as long as he was married to his ex now so our money in mixed. There is no his/my money and its our money. We only kept our money separate when he paid child support as his ex filed in court expecting me to pay her child support (thankfully the judge threw that demand out).

So, what you are saying is I could be married for 40 years to my husband but the day he dies, 100% of our money should go to his kids, and not me and our kids. Sure, ok.

That’s exactly what they are saying and it’s absolutely ludicrous.

[Anonymous]

OP, I was 27 and married when my half brother was born. We live in different states so we have more of an aunt/nephew relationship than brother/sister, but I love him. My children are 3 and 6 years younger than my brother and he has been a really good/fun uncle for them. It was also nice to have someone to ask for parenting advice who had been through these stages recently. There were definitely times when I wished my dad was more available for my kids but overall, it has been a good experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Always feel relieved that my husband and I both agreed to get fixed when we had our last kid. No matter what happens our kids will not be second fiddle.

My spouse and I agree our two kids are the only ones we want. And it’s laughable to us the men that start an entirely family once their first set of kids reach college. Ohmygod hell no! We are 3 years to empty nest and have all kinds of trips and fun plans lined up. He also got a vasectomy.

Blended family drama - no thanks. And having to go back to preschool, and teacher conferences and kids sports and busy weekends and worry …no way!

So, you think its ok women move on and get remarried and have more kids but men should just stay divorced and hand over their entire check to their ex?

Not to their ex, to their kids. The kids should not have their dads estate diluted by your kids.

No one is entitled to inheritance.

Exactly why the 2nd wife should not expect to get it.

Who says we want it?

Good we agree, you should not get it.

You should also start working stop collecting alimony and start saving for your kids inheritance. Instead of using men as a pay check

I actually have always made more money than my ex. Our money is in a trust and my ex can’t get it out without my say so.

I don’t think he’s stupid enough to take on a dependent 2nd wife.

I suspect if he’s stupid enough to remarry she wouldn’t be a slug who expected money from my family trust.

Good God! Second wives are slugs are they lol i have a career and don't take a dime from DH.
Seems to me from this thread these poor men WERE
Married to 'slugs' and now their baby slugs are crying about inheritance

Glad we agree his inheritance goes to his kids when he dies since you are not a slug and you don’t need it.

Exactly goes to all kids...not just your greedy baby slugs crying about daddy's money

You and he can create an inheritance if you want for your slug. My kids get all the money in our trust during our marriage.

Come on slug I had him during the low earning years… you can do this without your slug getting our money.

There was no money during the marriage. If she wanted his money, she shouldn't have cheated and stayed married to him. Simple.

This

We aren’t talking about ex cheating wives.

We are talking about his kids.

Do you punish the kids because she cheated? Nice

You aren't punishing kids by not leaving them an inheritance. Maybe all the money is the new wife's. Ever consider that?

You are not entitled to an inhertance.

And, yes, cheating wives has a huge impact.

We aren’t talking about the new wife’s money we are talking about the dad’s inheritance.

2nd wives can have a more negative impact, don’t be that person.

You understand that some marriages are long-term. We have been married for twice as long as he was married to his ex now so our money in mixed. There is no his/my money and its our money. We only kept our money separate when he paid child support as his ex filed in court expecting me to pay her child support (thankfully the judge threw that demand out).

So, what you are saying is I could be married for 40 years to my husband but the day he dies, 100% of our money should go to his kids, and not me and our kids. Sure, ok.

Let’s put it this way.

You are married 40 years.

You and he have $3M … you and he together.

You die.

Your $ goes to him. He dies 2/3 of your money goes to his 2 kids from his 1st marriage and your kid gets 1/3.

Each kid gets $1M

Orrrrrr

Your kid get your 1/2 $1.5M.

His kids split his 1/2 3 ways?

You want your money going to his kids from his 1st marriage?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So many spoiled grownup kids here. Make your own money, and be happy that your father has a new family! Happy for your father!

What’s it like being a trophy wife?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So many spoiled grownup kids here. Make your own money, and be happy that your father has a new family! Happy for your father!

Or make your own money and stop marrying for money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Always feel relieved that my husband and I both agreed to get fixed when we had our last kid. No matter what happens our kids will not be second fiddle.

My spouse and I agree our two kids are the only ones we want. And it’s laughable to us the men that start an entirely family once their first set of kids reach college. Ohmygod hell no! We are 3 years to empty nest and have all kinds of trips and fun plans lined up. He also got a vasectomy.

Blended family drama - no thanks. And having to go back to preschool, and teacher conferences and kids sports and busy weekends and worry …no way!

So, you think its ok women move on and get remarried and have more kids but men should just stay divorced and hand over their entire check to their ex?

Not to their ex, to their kids. The kids should not have their dads estate diluted by your kids.

No one is entitled to inheritance.

Exactly why the 2nd wife should not expect to get it.

Who says we want it?

Good we agree, you should not get it.

You should also start working stop collecting alimony and start saving for your kids inheritance. Instead of using men as a pay check

I actually have always made more money than my ex. Our money is in a trust and my ex can’t get it out without my say so.

I don’t think he’s stupid enough to take on a dependent 2nd wife.

I suspect if he’s stupid enough to remarry she wouldn’t be a slug who expected money from my family trust.

Good God! Second wives are slugs are they lol i have a career and don't take a dime from DH.
Seems to me from this thread these poor men WERE
Married to 'slugs' and now their baby slugs are crying about inheritance

Glad we agree his inheritance goes to his kids when he dies since you are not a slug and you don’t need it.

Exactly goes to all kids...not just your greedy baby slugs crying about daddy's money

You and he can create an inheritance if you want for your slug. My kids get all the money in our trust during our marriage.

Come on slug I had him during the low earning years… you can do this without your slug getting our money.

There was no money during the marriage. If she wanted his money, she shouldn't have cheated and stayed married to him. Simple.

This

We aren’t talking about ex cheating wives.

We are talking about his kids.

Do you punish the kids because she cheated? Nice

You aren't punishing kids by not leaving them an inheritance. Maybe all the money is the new wife's. Ever consider that?

You are not entitled to an inhertance.

And, yes, cheating wives has a huge impact.

We aren’t talking about the new wife’s money we are talking about the dad’s inheritance.

2nd wives can have a more negative impact, don’t be that person.

You understand that some marriages are long-term. We have been married for twice as long as he was married to his ex now so our money in mixed. There is no his/my money and its our money. We only kept our money separate when he paid child support as his ex filed in court expecting me to pay her child support (thankfully the judge threw that demand out).

So, what you are saying is I could be married for 40 years to my husband but the day he dies, 100% of our money should go to his kids, and not me and our kids. Sure, ok.

Thank you again. This is also why I keep my money separate so greedy first wife can't try and claim it

Absolutely keep everything separate at least until child support is over. I made the mistake of paying for plane tickets vs. giving him the money so she even demanded to the court that I continue to pay for them (except she wouldn't put the kids on the plane).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many spoiled grownup kids here. Make your own money, and be happy that your father has a new family! Happy for your father!

What’s it like being a trophy wife?

It's great being the trophy wife.