Christmas travel-leaving 2 year old home while whole family goes to Caribbean?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no way the Nanny wants to do this.

That's what I keep asking and feel that OP is eliding. The nanny is already the primary caregiver, but a week with zero breaks, during a period of time when both the weather and seasonal closures would make it hard to get out of the house, just sounds absolutely grueling.

I had my own kids for 5 days with no help due to hospitalization and it was very unpleasant and stressful to me.

[Anonymous]

WHy the heck would your nanny WANT your 2yo over christmas. She deserves a break.

Definitely cancel.

[Anonymous]

Iwouldn't leave a SN kid and go out of the country no way. You say you could be home in 24 hours but also say that the flights are so packed you can't change your itinerary. Heck I wouldn't leave a NT kid and go out of the country. The thought of not being by my child's side if something went wrong. Couldn't live with that. As for the nanny, being the sole caregiver for a SN kid for a full week 24/7 - that's a lot. I can't believe this is a real post.

[Anonymous]

OP, no way no how should you go on this trip drying the holidays.

[Anonymous]

I wish more people in this situation would go to the media. The mask mandates, without reasonable accomodations for small children, are inhumane. It was fine early in the pandemic, but we shouldn't be preventing families from traveling for nearly two years.

[Anonymous]

Are the airlines really that strict about masks on small kids? I flew with my 3yo in August and he sometimes wore his mask, sometimes took it off, and no one seemed to notice or care. I guess boarding and taxiing they might put up a stink?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no way the Nanny wants to do this.

Maybe it’s a matter of how much she gets paid?

Except OP is saying they spent all their money on a trip to the Caribbean and there's no more for another vacation for a year. I would say the nanny should be paid at least $7K for this week, given the level of responsibility. There's no way OP is paying that, or OP lives way beyond their means and no vacations would be a good learning lesson for her about booking something you can actually afford.

[Anonymous]

OP, I think that it is okay to leave him with the nanny. NP here, At first I thought otherwise but as I read your responses I do not think it is heartless or irresponsible. You did not plan this but it is where you find yourself. I would not take him and hope for the best on the plane as families of 2 year olds are absolutely being put off planes. You trust your nanny and she is well versed in his medical needs. Your family will be together on Christmas and will celebrate together. The 2 year old will not remember it. The 5 year old will only remember that the 2 year old wasn’t there if you constantly bring it up.

It sounds like both you, spouse, and DS5 could use this time together. Do not feel guilty. Nanny can plan different activities to keep son happy. I do think having a strong back-up to nanny is wise. You said family is nearby so ask someone to look in on them and maybe favorite aunt takes him to the playground on day. I am sure that you have already given medical power of attorney to nanny as you travel for work.

Go and enjoy.

-signed single parent of 3 yr old who went on a once of a lifetime trip the day after Christmas and left DC (18 months at the time)with grandparents with 3 back-up adults to help out. Felt guilty in the planning but afterwards was and am so glad I went! It was a parent of multiples that convinced me that it was okay for me to go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That’s awful and I have no advice but condolences. Going to point out that these rules are insane…utterly insane. No other country in the world is forcing 2 year olds to wear masks. This is why Biden has dismal approval ratings. He doesn’t give a f*** about real world implications on families.

Grow up.

DP but this sentiment is how we got here. No one in power cares about *moms mostly* who are actually dealing with the mess of policies they unnecessarily created. If you express concern (ie this isn’t realistic and there’s no science behind it), this is exactly the kind of response you get. Going to guess you work in government?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wish more people in this situation would go to the media. The mask mandates, without reasonable accomodations for small children, are inhumane. It was fine early in the pandemic, but we shouldn't be preventing families from traveling for nearly two years.

Yes. Let me get you my tiniest violin. Let’s call amnesty international!

Are you seriously suggesting that not getting to go to the Caribbean is a human rights violation?

Grow up.

[Anonymous]

My first memories are of being left with my (nice) grandma at 2 1/2 while my parents and siblings went away for a long weekend. I was beside myself with jealousy and was legit sort of mad about it for abt 10 years.

[Anonymous]

I can’t stomach reading all 12 pages of this thread, but OP, would you take your 2 year old on vacation and leave the older sib at another time? If so, then I guess if yo I feel okay, it’s fine. It just seems like a terrible lesson for the older brother - that it’s okay to leave a SN member
Behind? If you were going for a weekend maybe a drive away, that seems different. Or leaving both kids. But leaving only the SN kid? What if something happens to him. Or what if something happens to you and you’re not able to come back? It just seems…odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never ever leave a child behind. You can still get covid vaccinated and bring it back to him. Stay home.

Op here. Well we’ve all had Covid, and been vaxxed, and had boosters, and 5 yo will be fully vaxxed too. Plus we have to test negative to get back to US, and transmission is very low where we’re going. It’s good enough for me.

Oh please. Where in the Caribbean is the transmission low? Nowhere. Name the country.

So what are you going to do if you test positive? You won’t be able to get home for at least ten days. Who will care for your kid if you have to quarantine in the Caribbean?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish more people in this situation would go to the media. The mask mandates, without reasonable accomodations for small children, are inhumane. It was fine early in the pandemic, but we shouldn't be preventing families from traveling for nearly two years.

Yes. Let me get you my tiniest violin. Let’s call amnesty international!

Are you seriously suggesting that not getting to go to the Caribbean is a human rights violation?

Grow up.

Speaking for myself, my family is all in PR and my grandmother passed away three months ago. Would’ve loved for my daughter to have met her but also couldn’t chance the mask issue and end up on the no-fly list as it’s literally the only way to see my family. You sound really understanding and caring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you call the airline and speak to a supervisor. I would shoot for one parent and 5 year old child to leave night of Dec. 25. Other parent to change their flight and stay home until around Dec. 27. Have that parent be prepared to just not go if things aren’t working out. But if they are, leave child with nanny then and all fly back together (or have a 2 day overlap and try for other parent to be able to change flight and head back)

I vote for this! Do some very special things with the little guy before you go and then enjoy your time with the older one guilt free. Your son knows you love him, this is only a real problem if it’s a pattern of excluding him.