Discrepancy between you want vs what you can get

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:OP, I think men do not really look for anything more than good looks, especially at the get-go when it comes to meeting people.

Uh women specifically.
(Sorry.)

As long as a woman is attractive, fit, a great cook/housekeeper as well as an excellent Mother, w/a great sense of humor and has her own interests in life.
Those attributes mean so much more to many guys vs. how much money they generate.

A successful lawyer, physician or entrepreneur, etc. would marry a Nanny/Teacher/Nurse as long as she was physically attractive to him.
Bonus points if she is great in bed & enjoys frequent sex.

This is outdated. People assortive date now. Especially lawyers and doctors.

It’s amazing how so many people continue to ignore this.

Lol like the towns this lady wants to move to (CC MD or the like) aren’t chock full of sahms?!

SAHMs with Ivy degrees (where they met their spouses) or former big law, medicine, finance who left to raise their kids. These husbands want smart accomplished wives who will pass on smart genes and raise their kids well. No one marries the secretary anymore.

You don’t have “smart genes” just because Mummy and Daddy could afford to send you to nice schools.

If you are anywhere near being familiar with admission process of these schools, you would have known that money are just a good "extra" and not a guarantee of admission. They have hundreds of applicants from all over the world and a few are accepted. And even if you are not intelligent, after years in a private school you will have a huge educational advantage vs your peers in public schools.

My son recently came from a summer camp where he lived in tents with other kids of different background. Wilson HS kids is all about drugs, girls and partying vs a DC private school HS student who is all about college admissions, grades and future career paths. He literally felt that they spoke in 2 different languages: he's trilingual besides being far more eloquent in English. He is 2 years ahead in math vs public schools AP math level. Even their English is different: they don't know words like "abysmal". Nobody played chess or ever traveled anywhere outside the US. It was a eye opening experience for my child how privileged he truly is.

So now guess why top tier colleges still accept higher percentage of grads from my son's school vs DC public schools

I think this should just be pinned to the front page of DCUM forever!!!!!

What was his other observation is that there is no such educational gap with European schools. They had couple kids from France and Spain (from bilingual families). These kids go to public schools in their countries, are fluent in English and about same level in disciplines, sports and socially as my son in DC private.

US still has this huge educational gap between public schools: even the best public are way behind private, and thus this highly selective "casts" society when kids grow up. Everyone marries someone from a similar background: nobody wants relatives who use drugs.

So you went to public school, correct? Because surely a graduate of an elite private school would correctly use the term “caste” not “casts.” If you’re going to be an education snob, you’ve got to be word-perfect in all of your communication, PP.

Np. Oh come on. I went to public school and know that. And prob first learned it in HS British lit class or world history.

Yes, I, too, am a public school grad, and am mocking PP for claiming that private school education is soooo supeeeerior, when she cannot use a generally known term correctly. Public or private, she’s a snooty dumbass.

I am the poster above. I didn’t go to any US school, because I am foreign born. Would love to see your writing in my native language. Wilson HS “sucks” either way.

[Anonymous]

OP, can you HONESTLY say that you are making the most of your appearance? Have you worked on having a fun personality?

Being chubby or obese and bitter is not appealing. You are not really trying, figure out why.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think men do not really look for anything more than good looks, especially at the get-go when it comes to meeting people.

Uh women specifically.
(Sorry.)

As long as a woman is attractive, fit, a great cook/housekeeper as well as an excellent Mother, w/a great sense of humor and has her own interests in life.
Those attributes mean so much more to many guys vs. how much money they generate.

A successful lawyer, physician or entrepreneur, etc. would marry a Nanny/Teacher/Nurse as long as she was physically attractive to him.
Bonus points if she is great in bed & enjoys frequent sex.

This is outdated. People assortive date now. Especially lawyers and doctors.

It’s amazing how so many people continue to ignore this.

Lol like the towns this lady wants to move to (CC MD or the like) aren’t chock full of sahms?!

SAHMs with Ivy degrees (where they met their spouses) or former big law, medicine, finance who left to raise their kids. These husbands want smart accomplished wives who will pass on smart genes and raise their kids well. No one marries the secretary anymore.

OP says she has a great job at a think tank or NGO. Just because she doesn’t make > 300k doesn’t mean she is a secretary. You sound like a fool. Or a troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think men do not really look for anything more than good looks, especially at the get-go when it comes to meeting people.

Uh women specifically.
(Sorry.)

As long as a woman is attractive, fit, a great cook/housekeeper as well as an excellent Mother, w/a great sense of humor and has her own interests in life.
Those attributes mean so much more to many guys vs. how much money they generate.

A successful lawyer, physician or entrepreneur, etc. would marry a Nanny/Teacher/Nurse as long as she was physically attractive to him.
Bonus points if she is great in bed & enjoys frequent sex.

This is outdated. People assortive date now. Especially lawyers and doctors.

It’s amazing how so many people continue to ignore this.

Lol like the towns this lady wants to move to (CC MD or the like) aren’t chock full of sahms?!

SAHMs with Ivy degrees (where they met their spouses) or former big law, medicine, finance who left to raise their kids. These husbands want smart accomplished wives who will pass on smart genes and raise their kids well. No one marries the secretary anymore.

OP says she has a great job at a think tank or NGO. Just because she doesn’t make > 300k doesn’t mean she is a secretary. You sound like a fool. Or a troll.

I was responding to the previous post that places like Bethesda and Chevy Chase are full of SAHMs. Yes, they are, but SAHMs with excellent backgrounds. Im and no OP doesn't have a "great job". That's my point. If you don't get that you don't get any of this.

My DH is 6'3", Ivy educated and makes 1m+ a year. Guess my background. It's not think tank.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think men do not really look for anything more than good looks, especially at the get-go when it comes to meeting people.

Uh women specifically.
(Sorry.)

As long as a woman is attractive, fit, a great cook/housekeeper as well as an excellent Mother, w/a great sense of humor and has her own interests in life.
Those attributes mean so much more to many guys vs. how much money they generate.

A successful lawyer, physician or entrepreneur, etc. would marry a Nanny/Teacher/Nurse as long as she was physically attractive to him.
Bonus points if she is great in bed & enjoys frequent sex.

This is outdated. People assortive date now. Especially lawyers and doctors.

It’s amazing how so many people continue to ignore this.

Lol like the towns this lady wants to move to (CC MD or the like) aren’t chock full of sahms?!

SAHMs with Ivy degrees (where they met their spouses) or former big law, medicine, finance who left to raise their kids. These husbands want smart accomplished wives who will pass on smart genes and raise their kids well. No one marries the secretary anymore.

OP says she has a great job at a think tank or NGO. Just because she doesn’t make > 300k doesn’t mean she is a secretary. You sound like a fool. Or a troll.

I was responding to the previous post that places like Bethesda and Chevy Chase are full of SAHMs. Yes, they are, but SAHMs with excellent backgrounds. Im and no OP doesn't have a "great job". That's my point. If you don't get that you don't get any of this.

My DH is 6'3", Ivy educated and makes 1m+ a year. Guess my background. It's not think tank.

Your husband is 6’3: and your point is what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A couple of girlfriends and I have been having some honest discussions about this. We are still single into our late 30s and have good DC type jobs. (Non profits/think tanks). We are well educated and relatively successful and we each had a certain ideas about our future husbands. We wanted a go-getter professionally successful types but those guys never seemed particularly interested in us. I can say objectively that although bright and hardworking, neither of us is particularly conventionally attractive. Those guys seem to date and marry the pretty unassuming skinny type of girls.

So here we are in a dilemma. Marry someone we do not think is "worthy" of us or stay single, as the guys we want never wanted us anyway.

WWYD?

If I were you, I’d become the person I want to marry, because the likelihood that you are actually going to marry a guy like this are dim. If you want that lifestyle, you’re going to be the one paying for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Are you looking for romantic partners or business partners?

OP here. After putting myself through college and graduate school and acquiring a fulfilling and interesting policy job, I really do not want to marry some average joe making 100k a year so we can squeeze into a 500k townhouse in Vienna and take yearly vacations to OBX.

I want a SHF in Chevy Chase, private school for my kids and international vacations.

Why NOT me? Only because I am not blonde and skinny?

Its depressing.

Male here. With a SHF in Chevy Chase. Private school for my kids. You sound dull and materialistic. What do you bring to the table?

x10000000

Woman here. Exactly my thought. NP. I see so many of these shallow women where I live, I would feel bad for them, if they weren't so ......pathetic.

OP, why would someone want to marry you just because you NEED to have an S class before a certain birthday - are those life goals? Listen to yourself. GEESUS, people, get a grip. I knew a group that would go to Dewey every summer, rent a group house, and all they would talk about is marrying a man like that. Marriage is a business transaction to them, like the oldest profession in the world. I read this all the time on these boards, and see it IRL, it makes women look bad.

Oh please. Every single one of these smug married women posting above about how their lives are just like this, wanted exactly these things and found it. OP and her friends are just saying the quiet part out loud. If you don't believe me try taking one of these snotty affluent married women and have them change places with OP (sounds like a great premise for a movie). You will immediately see them completely lose their sh*t.

Wait what? Take a 40 year old woman who has been married for twenty years and put her DH through school, switch places with OP who acts like she is looking at a menu for lunch, for a life partner? How does that even make sense? How does OP pretend to know whose money it is, or what it took for the couple to get where they are?

No matter who OP is, or who OP marries some day (or not - because her attitude sucks), OP will be up against something - the abusive IL's, the DH's drinking/rage/whatever habits - there is always something, and OP may think it sounds "easy" - but if OP can't handle this part - how on earth is she going to handle the rest?

That is some royal BS. Zero percent of SAHW in Chevy Chase marriages helped put their DH through school. They just knew to lock down the lawyer or doctor earlier but it’s not like they didn’t see the career momentum and pedigree of their potential DH.

[Anonymous]

I just want to say, for all the people bragging and also for all the women envying women with their 6 foot 3 ivy educated husbands: I am currently dating someone who is six foot 3, Harvard undergraduate, a doctor, former Harvard faculty, has been a nationally recognized figure in his field, and appeared for all the world as a stable family man for nearly 30 years. Guess what, he cheated on her prolifically all that time and says she didn't know. Most people's perfect lives are seldom as perfect as they seem. He and ex-wife are both single now in their 60s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you looking for romantic partners or business partners?

OP here. After putting myself through college and graduate school and acquiring a fulfilling and interesting policy job, I really do not want to marry some average joe making 100k a year so we can squeeze into a 500k townhouse in Vienna and take yearly vacations to OBX.

I want a SHF in Chevy Chase, private school for my kids and international vacations.

Why NOT me? Only because I am not blonde and skinny?

Its depressing.

Male here. With a SHF in Chevy Chase. Private school for my kids. You sound dull and materialistic. What do you bring to the table?

x10000000

Woman here. Exactly my thought. NP. I see so many of these shallow women where I live, I would feel bad for them, if they weren't so ......pathetic.

OP, why would someone want to marry you just because you NEED to have an S class before a certain birthday - are those life goals? Listen to yourself. GEESUS, people, get a grip. I knew a group that would go to Dewey every summer, rent a group house, and all they would talk about is marrying a man like that. Marriage is a business transaction to them, like the oldest profession in the world. I read this all the time on these boards, and see it IRL, it makes women look bad.

Oh please. Every single one of these smug married women posting above about how their lives are just like this, wanted exactly these things and found it. OP and her friends are just saying the quiet part out loud. If you don't believe me try taking one of these snotty affluent married women and have them change places with OP (sounds like a great premise for a movie). You will immediately see them completely lose their sh*t.

Wait what? Take a 40 year old woman who has been married for twenty years and put her DH through school, switch places with OP who acts like she is looking at a menu for lunch, for a life partner? How does that even make sense? How does OP pretend to know whose money it is, or what it took for the couple to get where they are?

No matter who OP is, or who OP marries some day (or not - because her attitude sucks), OP will be up against something - the abusive IL's, the DH's drinking/rage/whatever habits - there is always something, and OP may think it sounds "easy" - but if OP can't handle this part - how on earth is she going to handle the rest?

That is some royal BS. Zero percent of SAHW in Chevy Chase marriages helped put their DH through school. They just knew to lock down the lawyer or doctor earlier but it’s not like they didn’t see the career momentum and pedigree of their potential DH.

Really? You've polled them all? What an asinine thing to say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just want to say, for all the people bragging and also for all the women envying women with their 6 foot 3 ivy educated husbands: I am currently dating someone who is six foot 3, Harvard undergraduate, a doctor, former Harvard faculty, has been a nationally recognized figure in his field, and appeared for all the world as a stable family man for nearly 30 years. Guess what, he cheated on her prolifically all that time and says she didn't know. Most people's perfect lives are seldom as perfect as they seem. He and ex-wife are both single now in their 60s.

Lol girl and you're bragging about this why? There's a reason he's divorced. Divorced guys aren't prizes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think men do not really look for anything more than good looks, especially at the get-go when it comes to meeting people.

Uh women specifically.
(Sorry.)

As long as a woman is attractive, fit, a great cook/housekeeper as well as an excellent Mother, w/a great sense of humor and has her own interests in life.
Those attributes mean so much more to many guys vs. how much money they generate.

A successful lawyer, physician or entrepreneur, etc. would marry a Nanny/Teacher/Nurse as long as she was physically attractive to him.
Bonus points if she is great in bed & enjoys frequent sex.

This is outdated. People assortive date now. Especially lawyers and doctors.

It’s amazing how so many people continue to ignore this.

Lol like the towns this lady wants to move to (CC MD or the like) aren’t chock full of sahms?!

SAHMs with Ivy degrees (where they met their spouses) or former big law, medicine, finance who left to raise their kids. These husbands want smart accomplished wives who will pass on smart genes and raise their kids well. No one marries the secretary anymore.

OP says she has a great job at a think tank or NGO. Just because she doesn’t make > 300k doesn’t mean she is a secretary. You sound like a fool. Or a troll.

I was responding to the previous post that places like Bethesda and Chevy Chase are full of SAHMs. Yes, they are, but SAHMs with excellent backgrounds. Im and no OP doesn't have a "great job". That's my point. If you don't get that you don't get any of this.

My DH is 6'3", Ivy educated and makes 1m+ a year. Guess my background. It's not think tank.

Your husband is 6’3: and your point is what?

Someone talked about this on a previous page.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think men do not really look for anything more than good looks, especially at the get-go when it comes to meeting people.

Uh women specifically.
(Sorry.)

As long as a woman is attractive, fit, a great cook/housekeeper as well as an excellent Mother, w/a great sense of humor and has her own interests in life.
Those attributes mean so much more to many guys vs. how much money they generate.

A successful lawyer, physician or entrepreneur, etc. would marry a Nanny/Teacher/Nurse as long as she was physically attractive to him.
Bonus points if she is great in bed & enjoys frequent sex.

This is outdated. People assortive date now. Especially lawyers and doctors.

It’s amazing how so many people continue to ignore this.

Lol like the towns this lady wants to move to (CC MD or the like) aren’t chock full of sahms?!

SAHMs with Ivy degrees (where they met their spouses) or former big law, medicine, finance who left to raise their kids. These husbands want smart accomplished wives who will pass on smart genes and raise their kids well. No one marries the secretary anymore.

You don’t have “smart genes” just because Mummy and Daddy could afford to send you to nice schools.

If you are anywhere near being familiar with admission process of these schools, you would have known that money are just a good "extra" and not a guarantee of admission. They have hundreds of applicants from all over the world and a few are accepted. And even if you are not intelligent, after years in a private school you will have a huge educational advantage vs your peers in public schools.

My son recently came from a summer camp where he lived in tents with other kids of different background. Wilson HS kids is all about drugs, girls and partying vs a DC private school HS student who is all about college admissions, grades and future career paths. He literally felt that they spoke in 2 different languages: he's trilingual besides being far more eloquent in English. He is 2 years ahead in math vs public schools AP math level. Even their English is different: they don't know words like "abysmal". Nobody played chess or ever traveled anywhere outside the US. It was a eye opening experience for my child how privileged he truly is.

So now guess why top tier colleges still accept higher percentage of grads from my son's school vs DC public schools

Wow! You sound just as clueless and offensive as the OP. And not very smart.
My best employee graduated from Wilson HS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is an obvious troll, but what income (presumably combined from both spouses) is required to live the life she describes?

The income she would be happy with includes family money.
Very few folks can afford that level of lifestyle completely on their own.

depends on when you bought your house, I think. We bought in 2010 but made it work on ~500k. HHI is up to 800k now (recent promotion) and we are looking to buy a second home at the beach or on a lake. 3 kids. We don't do private but they will have enough in their college funds to pay for undergrad and graduate degrees. Travel is our big splurge and we spend 60k on that. And guess what, one of those trips is to the OBX and it's our kids' favorite tradition! LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just want to say, for all the people bragging and also for all the women envying women with their 6 foot 3 ivy educated husbands: I am currently dating someone who is six foot 3, Harvard undergraduate, a doctor, former Harvard faculty, has been a nationally recognized figure in his field, and appeared for all the world as a stable family man for nearly 30 years. Guess what, he cheated on her prolifically all that time and says she didn't know. Most people's perfect lives are seldom as perfect as they seem. He and ex-wife are both single now in their 60s.

Lol girl and you're bragging about this why? There's a reason he's divorced. Divorced guys aren't prizes.

You are missing the point. The whole time he was a married guy, he was the picture and resume of the husbands these CC ladies are bragging about. it took 30 years to prove differently.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think men do not really look for anything more than good looks, especially at the get-go when it comes to meeting people.

Uh women specifically.
(Sorry.)

As long as a woman is attractive, fit, a great cook/housekeeper as well as an excellent Mother, w/a great sense of humor and has her own interests in life.
Those attributes mean so much more to many guys vs. how much money they generate.

A successful lawyer, physician or entrepreneur, etc. would marry a Nanny/Teacher/Nurse as long as she was physically attractive to him.
Bonus points if she is great in bed & enjoys frequent sex.

This is outdated. People assortive date now. Especially lawyers and doctors.

It’s amazing how so many people continue to ignore this.

Lol like the towns this lady wants to move to (CC MD or the like) aren’t chock full of sahms?!

SAHMs with Ivy degrees (where they met their spouses) or former big law, medicine, finance who left to raise their kids. These husbands want smart accomplished wives who will pass on smart genes and raise their kids well. No one marries the secretary anymore.

You don’t have “smart genes” just because Mummy and Daddy could afford to send you to nice schools.

If you are anywhere near being familiar with admission process of these schools, you would have known that money are just a good "extra" and not a guarantee of admission. They have hundreds of applicants from all over the world and a few are accepted. And even if you are not intelligent, after years in a private school you will have a huge educational advantage vs your peers in public schools.

My son recently came from a summer camp where he lived in tents with other kids of different background. Wilson HS kids is all about drugs, girls and partying vs a DC private school HS student who is all about college admissions, grades and future career paths. He literally felt that they spoke in 2 different languages: he's trilingual besides being far more eloquent in English. He is 2 years ahead in math vs public schools AP math level. Even their English is different: they don't know words like "abysmal". Nobody played chess or ever traveled anywhere outside the US. It was a eye opening experience for my child how privileged he truly is.

So now guess why top tier colleges still accept higher percentage of grads from my son's school vs DC public schools

I think this should just be pinned to the front page of DCUM forever!!!!!

What was his other observation is that there is no such educational gap with European schools. They had couple kids from France and Spain (from bilingual families). These kids go to public schools in their countries, are fluent in English and about same level in disciplines, sports and socially as my son in DC private.

US still has this huge educational gap between public schools: even the best public are way behind private, and thus this highly selective "casts" society when kids grow up. Everyone marries someone from a similar background: nobody wants relatives who use drugs.

So you went to public school, correct? Because surely a graduate of an elite private school would correctly use the term “caste” not “casts.” If you’re going to be an education snob, you’ve got to be word-perfect in all of your communication, PP.

Np. Oh come on. I went to public school and know that. And prob first learned it in HS British lit class or world history.

Yes, I, too, am a public school grad, and am mocking PP for claiming that private school education is soooo supeeeerior, when she cannot use a generally known term correctly. Public or private, she’s a snooty dumbass.

I am the poster above. I didn’t go to any US school, because I am foreign born. Would love to see your writing in my native language. Wilson HS “sucks” either way.

Oh, so you know f*ck all about the American public school system. Take a seat.