Discrepancy between you want vs what you can get
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Anonymous
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A couple of girlfriends and I have been having some honest discussions about this. We are still single into our late 30s and have good DC type jobs. (Non profits/think tanks). We are well educated and relatively successful and we each had a certain ideas about our future husbands. We wanted a go-getter professionally successful types but those guys never seemed particularly interested in us. I can say objectively that although bright and hardworking, neither of us is particularly conventionally attractive. Those guys seem to date and marry the pretty unassuming skinny type of girls.
So here we are in a dilemma. Marry someone we do not think is "worthy" of us or stay single, as the guys we want never wanted us anyway. WWYD? |
Anonymous
| I’d adjust my expectations so that people wouldn’t think I was shallow. |
Anonymous
| DC has a shortage of those men, and way too many women competing for their attention. |
Anonymous
| Are you looking for romantic partners or business partners? |
Anonymous
OP here. After putting myself through college and graduate school and acquiring a fulfilling and interesting policy job, I really do not want to marry some average joe making 100k a year so we can squeeze into a 500k townhouse in Vienna and take yearly vacations to OBX. I want a SHF in Chevy Chase, private school for my kids and international vacations. Why NOT me? Only because I am not blonde and skinny? Its depressing. |
Anonymous
You can make yourself blonde and skinny. Shrug. Seriously though. You can. |
Anonymous
| Plastic surgery may help. |
Anonymous
| Physiognomy is real. You’re error is thinking those women you despise are unassuming and not just as accomplished as you are. |
Anonymous
| Men want women who are fun and in great shape. We don’t care about your degree. |
Anonymous
Okay, you lost me here. My DH is a fed and you would probably find him “unworthy” based on his income and the fact that OBX would be a much-anticipated vacation - but he’s my best friend, my rock through cancer, a wonderful father, partner and companion in life. I cannot imagine categorizing people as “worthy” or “unworthy” based on the superficial criteria you have mentioned. Regardless - NO YOU SHOULD NOT marry someone you perceive as unworthy. That would be cruel. I have a hard time believing you are for real. |
Anonymous
| You need to lower your standards. You seem to think very highly of yourselves. Only in DC would people think those are “good jobs”. |
Anonymous
Since you are in your late 30s, why didn't you mass the millions necessary to buy the single family house in Chevy Chase. There were so many opportunities to do so with stock market, crypto and real estate. There are more to come though. You might be rich in 10 years and the guy you want may want you. |
Anonymous
Male here. With a SHF in Chevy Chase. Private school for my kids. You sound dull and materialistic. What do you bring to the table? |
Anonymous
OP- you waited too long. Those of us met those guys and married them by 30. I have a Master’s Degree and work in similar field. I have the life/husband you are looking for. Almost all of my girlfriends do as well and the lady of us married at 33. |
Anonymous
^ latest of us, not lady 
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