Parent Intensity at Sidwell vs. STA

[Anonymous]

My son also got into both in a previous year. FWIW, my son felt that the learning style of each school was different. When he shadowed, most classes at Sidwell had a collaborative project and felt more independently driven. The kids were on iPads to do work. St. Albans felt more like "classic school" with a project here or there and very teacher-driven.

I don't think one approach is better than the other but my son definitely favored one approach over the other.

Something else to consider when deciding. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:STA parents sometimes joke there is a 'force field' at the door designed to keep parents out of the building. I mean, sure they are welcome and all but you generally get this vibe that parents aren't really needed to volunteer in the classroom and sit in on classes, etc (i.e. how it is in some elementary schools). Part of it is the boys are getting older, but I think part of it is designed to dial back some of the parental pressure on the kids during the day. I also think the building is designed as a maze to keep the parents from finding their way around the complex.

Another example is that when parents login to the student website, they don't have access to the kids progress (the kids have it on their logins, but not the parents). I asked IT about this 'glitch' and they said 'it's not a glitch, it's designed that way to keep the parents from fixating on the kids' day-to-day progress".

But as an earlier poster mentioned, I suspect it's a year-by-year thing. Some years may be better than others.

Sidwell parents don't go to Upper School at all, other than parent-teacher meetings. Parents do not have access to anything academic other than the quarterly/semester reports.

Another Sidwell upper school parent here. Maybe the middle school or lower school years are different. Perhaps parents are more present. But it hasn't been my experience in upper school. My DC came in 9th grade and agree with PP. other than 9th grade parent conference, there is no other interaction or other parents around campus. I could not even log in to my DC schedule when it came out bc only the students have access. Again, only access online is to see the quarterly and semester grades and to put money into Fox den acct.

[Anonymous]

So, the parents in both these schools cannot be trusted to behave like adults? Says a lot about the parent community.

We are at a different high school, and parents are able to access the kids' class schedule.

[Anonymous]

Know plenty of people at STA who complain about the work load and intensity level. They hire tutors, help their sons with homework, and struggle with social dynamics.

[Anonymous]

Both are great schools. At Sidwell, teacher conferences end after 9th grade. They try to promote student independence which is a good thing.

I think both schools grade too strictly which disadvantage kids who later apply to "top 10" schools --- Even a handful of "B" grades knock you out of consideration at these colleges, unless you have a hook.

Yes, the colleges are aware of strong academics, but when top schools get 50,000+ applications, all bets are off...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Both are great schools. At Sidwell, teacher conferences end after 9th grade. They try to promote student independence which is a good thing.

I think both schools grade too strictly which disadvantage kids who later apply to "top 10" schools --- Even a handful of "B" grades knock you out of consideration at these colleges, unless you have a hook.

Yes, the colleges are aware of strong academics, but when top schools get 50,000+ applications, all bets are off...

NCS too. I don’t know why these schools do this. It does put their applicants at a disadvantage when going against schools that don’t grade so hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, the parents in both these schools cannot be trusted to behave like adults? Says a lot about the parent community.

We are at a different high school, and parents are able to access the kids' class schedule.

If course they can access schedule. They can’t access daily grades and micromanage. It’s not that they can’t be trusted. It’s so students have some autonomy and don’t have their parents tracking every quiz, homework grade, etc...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS fortunate enough to have been admitted to both. We know that both are very rigorous academically, but we are trying to get a sense of how much of the academic intensity comes from the boys/students, the school, and the parents. At the STA open house, it seemed like the school really wanted parents to let the boys develop independence and discipline without much parental involvement. We have heard more mixed things about the parent community and their intensity and involvement regarding student performance at Sidwell. It’s a tough question to ask directly, so taking a little bit of a chance indirectly here.

Is this for 9th for next year? Other parents’ intensity won’t affect your child unless they sabotage your child which is unlikely. All parents have differnet parenting styles and their intensity or lack of intensity really affect her child. I would be more concerned with the fit. Is your child athletic? What kind of interests does he have? Does he tend to be more conservative or liberal? These are all things to inquire about. Also ask if you can talk to some families in the grade he is applying to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Both are great schools. At Sidwell, teacher conferences end after 9th grade. They try to promote student independence which is a good thing.

I think both schools grade too strictly which disadvantage kids who later apply to "top 10" schools --- Even a handful of "B" grades knock you out of consideration at these colleges, unless you have a hook.

Yes, the colleges are aware of strong academics, but when top schools get 50,000+ applications, all bets are off...

DS a Senior at STA. I don't think this is true at all. The number of boys getting straight As is almost nil, but many, many boys are getting accepted to top schools. In our class, I don't see parents or exerting pressure at all; many wish that their sons would relax a bit. In terms of tutoring, I only heard about it when someone was struggling (C) in class, except for SAT/ACT test prep. Our son didn't do a prep class and was the overwhelming exception. I do regret him making that decision.

As far as GPAs, I think colleges are starting to look for a little more balance, and maybe not valuing the 4.0 GPA quite as much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS fortunate enough to have been admitted to both. We know that both are very rigorous academically, but we are trying to get a sense of how much of the academic intensity comes from the boys/students, the school, and the parents. At the STA open house, it seemed like the school really wanted parents to let the boys develop independence and discipline without much parental involvement. We have heard more mixed things about the parent community and their intensity and involvement regarding student performance at Sidwell. It’s a tough question to ask directly, so taking a little bit of a chance indirectly here.

Is this for 9th for next year? Other parents’ intensity won’t affect your child unless they sabotage your child which is unlikely. All parents have differnet parenting styles and their intensity or lack of intensity really affect her child. I would be more concerned with the fit. Is your child athletic? What kind of interests does he have? Does he tend to be more conservative or liberal? These are all things to inquire about. Also ask if you can talk to some families in the grade he is applying to.

PP. it should say other parents’ intensity WILL NOT affect your child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, the parents in both these schools cannot be trusted to behave like adults? Says a lot about the parent community.

We are at a different high school, and parents are able to access the kids' class schedule.

New poster here, Sidwell US parent. As an actual school parent, I have a different assessment: the school genuinely promotes academic independence. My son”s class schedule is .... my son”s. I have no idea if my 16/17/18 year old has a quiz tomorrow: that’s his responsibility. As a near-adult, he’s in training to manage his workflow on his own and juggle multiple demands without Mama’s oversight. The faculty make themselves very accessible during office hours and online, according to my son. I have encouraged him to seek help occasionally, but only because he raises the subject at the dinner table and not because I track his day-to-day progress online.

I’m sure there are more intensive parenting approaches among upper school families but I wouldn’t know because as the PP said, parents aren’t on campus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think both schools grade too strictly which disadvantage kids who later apply to "top 10" schools --- Even a handful of "B" grades knock you out of consideration at these colleges, unless you have a hook.

Yes, the colleges are aware of strong academics, but when top schools get 50,000+ applications, all bets are off...

College admissions offices are smart and have plenty of tools to help them differentiate between legitimate GPAs and those that are inflated.

[Anonymous]

When a "top 20" college admissions office with a staff of 15-20 people get 60,000 applications for a thousand spots they are not going to have time nor bandwidth to "evaluate and adjust for grading nuances" at top privates. They will first eliminate applications that fall below a certain test score/GPA threshold...The remaining apps will get a closer look...

The reputation advantage of "top DC privates" get wiped out when there are too many applicants...

This year is going to be tough if you were "aiming high."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When a "top 20" college admissions office with a staff of 15-20 people get 60,000 applications for a thousand spots they are not going to have time nor bandwidth to "evaluate and adjust for grading nuances" at top privates. They will first eliminate applications that fall below a certain test score/GPA threshold...The remaining apps will get a closer look...

The reputation advantage of "top DC privates" get wiped out when there are too many applicants...

This year is going to be tough if you were "aiming high."

Actually, it's more like this: When a "top 20" college admissions office with a staff of 15-20 people get 60,000 applications for a thousand spots they are...going to single out all the applications from Sidwell, STA, NCS, Potomac, etc. and evaluate those against each other first and the publics separately.

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine there is a significant difference in parent intensity at Sidwell and STA. And I knew STA community pretty well.

Also, I'd pick the school based on where my kid feels most comfortable, not where I feel most comfortable.