Almost a month since wedding and no sex

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:are you the OP of this thread?

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/682243.page

I was wondering the same thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you want to be married to this guy? The marriage hasn't been consummated yet, so you could get an annulment.

That doesn't ultimately help OP much if the real problem is that she's frigid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:are you the OP of this thread?

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/682243.page

I was wondering the same thing.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you want to be married to this guy? The marriage hasn't been consummated yet, so you could get an annulment.

That doesn't ultimately help OP much if the real problem is that she's frigid.

She's not frigid, she's just bought into the myth that a girl has to remain pure until her wedding and that it's a special flower she gives to her husband.
But it sounds like her husband is not a virgin and maybe isn't religious at all. He might be getting some on the side.

[Anonymous]

Period sex is OK. Don't let that stop you. Natural lubricant.

But. If you really want some time with your DH, take a day off and spend it in bed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a virgin. We got married a month ago. I was expecting to have a romantic wedding night with either sex then or the morning of.

My husband partied too hard and was too drunk on our wedding night and we were bickering and fighting the next morning.

The week after we were fighting/arguing.

The next week I got my period.

Then it was work/thanksgiving week...

And now my husband is furious. He says our marriage is not normal and he desperately wants intimacy.I said I want to have sex too but I thought it would be in a special moment and not simply during a weekday when we come home after work at 9.

We had another huge fight this morning. I am exhausted...and scared for my marriage.

You and dh seem to be mostly upset bc no sex. You’ll learn...it can be a downward spiral of feelings when it doesn’t happen. What I fail to understand is...if there’s no going all the way, I don’t understand why (and maybe I am incorrect), some kissing/making out hasn’t led to a lot more. Just start kissing him; tell him you want to take charge so you feel comfortable, and then do what comes naturally. Take this as far as you want to go each night. I guarantee this will get you both on track.
-dh and I were virgins until our wedding, but we also went away on a honeymoon for a week. Didn’t you go get away somewhere? It helps to not be at home where there is stuff happening (though that wouldnt have stopped us).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you want to be married to this guy? The marriage hasn't been consummated yet, so you could get an annulment.

That doesn't ultimately help OP much if the real problem is that she's frigid.

She's not frigid, she's just bought into the myth that a girl has to remain pure until her wedding and that it's a special flower she gives to her husband.
But it sounds like her husband is not a virgin and maybe isn't religious at all. He might be getting some on the side.

But if she really wanted it to happen, if she was excited to give him that "gift," she would be prioritizing making the right occasion happen instead of finding a bunch of excuses not to do it. OP will never admit it, but I'm willing to bet at least half of that fighting the entire week after their wedding was about OP trying to dodge having sex.

[Anonymous]

I am a virgin. We got married a month ago. I was expecting to have a romantic wedding night with either sex then or the morning of.

My husband partied too hard and was too drunk on our wedding night and we were bickering and fighting the next morning. WTF? BICKERING ON YOUR WEDDING NIGHT/DAY/DAY AFTER? YOU HAVE YEARS AHEAD OF YOU TO BICKER.

The week after we were fighting/arguing. THE WHOLE WEEK? NON STOP?

The next week I got my period. 7 DAY LONG PERIOD? YOU CAN HAVE SEX ON YOUR PERIOD, YOU KNOW

Then it was work/thanksgiving week... WHEN I GIVE THANKS I CAN ALSO STILL HAVE SEX THAT NIGHT. SAME WITH WORK. IN FACT, I WORKED YESTERDAY AND HAD SEX LAST NIGHT. WHAAAAAT?

And now my husband is furious. HE SOUNDS LIKE AN ASSSSSSSS.
He says our marriage is not normal HE'S RIGHT and he desperately wants intimacy. NO DUH.
I said I want to have sex too ARE YOU SURE? but I thought it would be in a special moment and not simply during a weekday when we come home after work at 9.AND YOU SOUND LIKE A TEENY-BOPPER. WEEKDAYS ARE SPECIAL IF YOU MAKE THEM SPECIAL

We had another huge fight this morning. YOU GUYS FIGHT TOO MUCH. I am exhausted...and scared for my marriage. WHY ARE YOU EXHAUSTED? YOU AREN'T STAYING UP AT NIGHT HAVING SEX.

[Anonymous]

So you two fought about him getting drunk for 2 weeks?! That's the major problem OP. Period week and Thanksgiving week have nothing to do with this, just lame excuses.

You're turning your virginity into some sort of weird fairytale and holding it out until you no longer feel angry about it.

Work out your anger or get an annulment.

[Anonymous]

I'm confused why you counted off the whole week because of Thanksgiving.

You sound young and naive. You are always coming up with excuses. So you guys get home at 9? One night, bring home some takeout and wine. No TV, no cell phones, etc. Sit and eat together and talk. Then, start to snuggle and have it lead to sex. Now, if you're saying that isn't special enough, you've got bigger issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a virgin. We got married a month ago. I was expecting to have a romantic wedding night with either sex then or the morning of.

My husband partied too hard and was too drunk on our wedding night and we were bickering and fighting the next morning. WTF? BICKERING ON YOUR WEDDING NIGHT/DAY/DAY AFTER? YOU HAVE YEARS AHEAD OF YOU TO BICKER.

The week after we were fighting/arguing. THE WHOLE WEEK? NON STOP?

The next week I got my period. 7 DAY LONG PERIOD? YOU CAN HAVE SEX ON YOUR PERIOD, YOU KNOW

Then it was work/thanksgiving week... WHEN I GIVE THANKS I CAN ALSO STILL HAVE SEX THAT NIGHT. SAME WITH WORK. IN FACT, I WORKED YESTERDAY AND HAD SEX LAST NIGHT. WHAAAAAT?

And now my husband is furious. HE SOUNDS LIKE AN ASSSSSSSS.
He says our marriage is not normal HE'S RIGHT and he desperately wants intimacy. NO DUH.
I said I want to have sex too ARE YOU SURE? but I thought it would be in a special moment and not simply during a weekday when we come home after work at 9.AND YOU SOUND LIKE A TEENY-BOPPER. WEEKDAYS ARE SPECIAL IF YOU MAKE THEM SPECIAL

We had another huge fight this morning. YOU GUYS FIGHT TOO MUCH. I am exhausted...and scared for my marriage. WHY ARE YOU EXHAUSTED? YOU AREN'T STAYING UP AT NIGHT HAVING SEX.

I disagree that the husband sounds like an ass. He waited for her not having sex until they got married, then she puts off sex for another month.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a virgin. We got married a month ago. I was expecting to have a romantic wedding night with either sex then or the morning of.

My husband partied too hard and was too drunk on our wedding night and we were bickering and fighting the next morning. WTF? BICKERING ON YOUR WEDDING NIGHT/DAY/DAY AFTER? YOU HAVE YEARS AHEAD OF YOU TO BICKER.

The week after we were fighting/arguing. THE WHOLE WEEK? NON STOP?

The next week I got my period. 7 DAY LONG PERIOD? YOU CAN HAVE SEX ON YOUR PERIOD, YOU KNOW

Then it was work/thanksgiving week... WHEN I GIVE THANKS I CAN ALSO STILL HAVE SEX THAT NIGHT. SAME WITH WORK. IN FACT, I WORKED YESTERDAY AND HAD SEX LAST NIGHT. WHAAAAAT?

And now my husband is furious. HE SOUNDS LIKE AN ASSSSSSSS.
He says our marriage is not normal HE'S RIGHT and he desperately wants intimacy. NO DUH.
I said I want to have sex too ARE YOU SURE? but I thought it would be in a special moment and not simply during a weekday when we come home after work at 9.AND YOU SOUND LIKE A TEENY-BOPPER. WEEKDAYS ARE SPECIAL IF YOU MAKE THEM SPECIAL

We had another huge fight this morning. YOU GUYS FIGHT TOO MUCH. I am exhausted...and scared for my marriage. WHY ARE YOU EXHAUSTED? YOU AREN'T STAYING UP AT NIGHT HAVING SEX.

I disagree that the husband sounds like an ass. He waited for her not having sex until they got married, then she puts off sex for another month.

Kind of agree with both of you. On the one hand, he's been waiting a looong time, and her excuses are flimsy af. But on the other hand, if you're marrying a terrified virgin maybe don't get hammered at your wedding and have a plan for the wedding night. It can't possibly be a surprise to him that she was expecting something special/romantic for her first time, on their wedding night.

We didn't have sex on our wedding night because we were exhausted/drunk, but we had been having sex for years. So the biggest thing about that day was celebrating our wedding, enjoying the party (booze, etc) and spending time with our guests. If we had been waiting to have sex for the first time I would expect that to rank higher on the list of important things about the day than booze.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a virgin. We got married a month ago. I was expecting to have a romantic wedding night with either sex then or the morning of.

My husband partied too hard and was too drunk on our wedding night and we were bickering and fighting the next morning. WTF? BICKERING ON YOUR WEDDING NIGHT/DAY/DAY AFTER? YOU HAVE YEARS AHEAD OF YOU TO BICKER.

The week after we were fighting/arguing. THE WHOLE WEEK? NON STOP?

The next week I got my period. 7 DAY LONG PERIOD? YOU CAN HAVE SEX ON YOUR PERIOD, YOU KNOW

Then it was work/thanksgiving week... WHEN I GIVE THANKS I CAN ALSO STILL HAVE SEX THAT NIGHT. SAME WITH WORK. IN FACT, I WORKED YESTERDAY AND HAD SEX LAST NIGHT. WHAAAAAT?

And now my husband is furious. HE SOUNDS LIKE AN ASSSSSSSS.
He says our marriage is not normal HE'S RIGHT and he desperately wants intimacy. NO DUH.
I said I want to have sex too ARE YOU SURE? but I thought it would be in a special moment and not simply during a weekday when we come home after work at 9.AND YOU SOUND LIKE A TEENY-BOPPER. WEEKDAYS ARE SPECIAL IF YOU MAKE THEM SPECIAL

We had another huge fight this morning. YOU GUYS FIGHT TOO MUCH. I am exhausted...and scared for my marriage. WHY ARE YOU EXHAUSTED? YOU AREN'T STAYING UP AT NIGHT HAVING SEX.

Alllllllllllll of this!

[Anonymous]

I call troll.

[Anonymous]

Go to therapy already. You two need help.