Fiance and I can't agree on wedding date

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don't get married, this marriage won't last.


Why would you say that? Sounds crazy to judge that based on this alone.

For further explanation

Me: I’ve always wanted a fall wedding. Fall is my favorite season and September just seems like a beautiful time to get married. I hate hot weather.

Fiancé: He wants a summer wedding. Fall is okay but he thinks summer will be more beautiful.

We can’t do spring because of his allergies. Neither of us want a winter wedding.

We are getting married in Chicago where we are both from. He wants a June wedding ( so it won’t be too hot) and I want a cooler September wedding.



DH and I got married in September, without realizing that it's during the school year, when weekend kid activities ramp up. All the guests still came with their kids, which was really nice of them.

So if you can tolerate the heat, perhaps June, after the school year ends, ensures that you can celebrate without giving your guests too much trouble, and that you can also have anniversaries that aren't bogged down in Back to School Nights and first PTA and sport meetings, etc.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don't get married, this marriage won't last.


Why would you say that? Sounds crazy to judge that based on this alone.

For further explanation

Me: I’ve always wanted a fall wedding. Fall is my favorite season and September just seems like a beautiful time to get married. I hate hot weather.

Fiancé: He wants a summer wedding. Fall is okay but he thinks summer will be more beautiful.

We can’t do spring because of his allergies. Neither of us want a winter wedding.

We are getting married in Chicago where we are both from. He wants a June wedding ( so it won’t be too hot) and I want a cooler September wedding.



Since you already know where you want to get married, start looking at venues. You may find a venue that doesn't have a June date for 3 years but a Sept date sooner. Or the opposite. Or you may have to find a different month as these are the two most popular months.

You're also looking at a late Sept/early Oct wedding if you want it to be cooler. Sept is still plenty hot.


It depends on the year but it’s comfortable in late September in Chicago most years. We don’t need cold - just not like 80’s.

We have two venues and leaning towards one. Both venues have June and September dates but we do have to act fast to reserve it.
Anonymous
It really doesn’t matter. You have a long and hard road ahead of you getting worked up about something so minor. I would say it’s a good test if your couple compromising skills which presently seem weak.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don't get married, this marriage won't last.


Why would you say that? Sounds crazy to judge that based on this alone.

For further explanation

Me: I’ve always wanted a fall wedding. Fall is my favorite season and September just seems like a beautiful time to get married. I hate hot weather.

Fiancé: He wants a summer wedding. Fall is okay but he thinks summer will be more beautiful.

We can’t do spring because of his allergies. Neither of us want a winter wedding.

We are getting married in Chicago where we are both from. He wants a June wedding ( so it won’t be too hot) and I want a cooler September wedding.



DH and I got married in September, without realizing that it's during the school year, when weekend kid activities ramp up. All the guests still came with their kids, which was really nice of them.

So if you can tolerate the heat, perhaps June, after the school year ends, ensures that you can celebrate without giving your guests too much trouble, and that you can also have anniversaries that aren't bogged down in Back to School Nights and first PTA and sport meetings, etc.



We won’t be having kids at the wedding. At least none under the age or 12. Only exceptions are his nephew who is 4 and will be our ring bearer.

Most of our relatives have older kids. Most of our friends either don’t have kids or have babies who will stay with family during our wedding.
Anonymous
If you can't compromise on this (and I mean truly compromise not one of you bully your way into getting your choice), you need to think long and hard if you're ready for marriage.
Anonymous
June is more expensive. Get quotes. From the venders too. Don't be emotional about this, be pragmatic. Sit together and compare the numbers (Sept is going to win-out, btw, but don't make it about you and your preference)
Anonymous
Sept will not actually look like fall yet. You have to wait until mid October for that. So do whichever works best for your families
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don't get married, this marriage won't last.


Why would you say that? Sounds crazy to judge that based on this alone.

For further explanation

Me: I’ve always wanted a fall wedding. Fall is my favorite season and September just seems like a beautiful time to get married. I hate hot weather.

Fiancé: He wants a summer wedding. Fall is okay but he thinks summer will be more beautiful.

We can’t do spring because of his allergies. Neither of us want a winter wedding.

We are getting married in Chicago where we are both from. He wants a June wedding ( so it won’t be too hot) and I want a cooler September wedding.



Your fiancé is gay. As long as it doesn’t conflict with his office or sports calendar, no man cares this much about the date of his wedding.

And all the people who are pointing out that September is hell for parents are thinking of both your guests AND you two. A wedding is one day. An anniversary that conflicts with BTSN, fall athlete orientation and parents’ weekend is the gift that keeps on giving.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don't get married, this marriage won't last.


Why would you say that? Sounds crazy to judge that based on this alone.

For further explanation

Me: I’ve always wanted a fall wedding. Fall is my favorite season and September just seems like a beautiful time to get married. I hate hot weather.

Fiancé: He wants a summer wedding. Fall is okay but he thinks summer will be more beautiful.

We can’t do spring because of his allergies. Neither of us want a winter wedding.

We are getting married in Chicago where we are both from. He wants a June wedding ( so it won’t be too hot) and I want a cooler September wedding.



Your fiancé is gay. As long as it doesn’t conflict with his office or sports calendar, no man cares this much about the date of his wedding.

And all the people who are pointing out that September is hell for parents are thinking of both your guests AND you two. A wedding is one day. An anniversary that conflicts with BTSN, fall athlete orientation and parents’ weekend is the gift that keeps on giving.


He’s not gay. Not all men are into sports. Some men do care when and where they get married. How sexist of you.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don't get married, this marriage won't last.


Why would you say that? Sounds crazy to judge that based on this alone.

For further explanation

Me: I’ve always wanted a fall wedding. Fall is my favorite season and September just seems like a beautiful time to get married. I hate hot weather.

Fiancé: He wants a summer wedding. Fall is okay but he thinks summer will be more beautiful.

We can’t do spring because of his allergies. Neither of us want a winter wedding.

We are getting married in Chicago where we are both from. He wants a June wedding ( so it won’t be too hot) and I want a cooler September wedding.



Your fiancé is gay. As long as it doesn’t conflict with his office or sports calendar, no man cares this much about the date of his wedding.

And all the people who are pointing out that September is hell for parents are thinking of both your guests AND you two. A wedding is one day. An anniversary that conflicts with BTSN, fall athlete orientation and parents’ weekend is the gift that keeps on giving.


Please tell me this is a joke post. A grown adult doesn't actually think like this do they?
Anonymous
Where are the venues and are you counting on a backdrop of blooms and gardens?

June you get the benefit of full flower season. September might get you some reblooming plants, but less so.

Anonymous
September becomes busy once you have school aged kids. We rarely get to celebrate our anniversary with so much else going on that time of year. I agree that October would be a better fall month and June is always nice and a traditional month for weddings.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Where are the venues and are you counting on a backdrop of blooms and gardens?

June you get the benefit of full flower season. September might get you some reblooming plants, but less so.



I don’t like flowers and don’t care about it. My fiancé has allergies and also hates flowers.

Our backdrop is two different locations. One overlooking Lake Michigan and the other overlooking the Chicago river. Other options will be overlooking the city. It will be a large and pretty expensive wedding.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:September becomes busy once you have school aged kids. We rarely get to celebrate our anniversary with so much else going on that time of year. I agree that October would be a better fall month and June is always nice and a traditional month for weddings.


We won’t be having kids at our wedding.
Anonymous
The wife usually gets to pick. Thankfully DH let me have what I want.

We know a couple who can’t seem to agree on a venue. Wife is set on a destination wedding that will be expensive for all her guests to get to. Like each guest will need to shell out thousands for flights and hotel. All the venues she wants are already booked. Groom seems to care less and prefers domestic.
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