Which of these women is 'doing better'?
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Anonymous
| All depends on the husband. |
Anonymous
|
Depends on what they do with the money and how long can they keep it going.
If we are looking at just one year, then B. |
Anonymous
| A by far: hate working and 500k is twice our hhi. |
Anonymous
| B- There is so much make freedom with this option. DH decides to leave, no financial stress, no change in lifestyle. With Option A, wife is totally dependent on H and H doesn’t make enough to provide financial security in case of divorce. |
Anonymous
Surrounded by cats and with a body county that will not allow her soul to move into the next chapter upon death |
Anonymous
| Depends on the husband.. |
Anonymous
| I’m B but older. It has been a long path to get here. When I had no flexibility, kids were little, there was no time for anything, I made a lot but not $$$, it was a difficult time. Today is totally different. I’m spending Monday morning posting here! |
Anonymous
Most people live very well on much less than this. And no, a sahm is not walking away penniless! I say this as someone working full time with a great life on much much much less. Both options have amazing freedom and stability. |
Anonymous
| A. Lived it. Loved it. I was also dreaming of being a SAHM since I was a little girl. |
Anonymous
I'd rather be Woman 2 for sure. But you forgot this on: c. Woman 3: Has her own family money. |
Anonymous
|
As a mother, A was absolutely the best option for me and completely worthwhile. 500K is a fantastic HHI. I can outsource all I want and I get to be with my kids. Besides, the allure of working disappeared when I had kids and no amount of money I earned, made up for the time I was absent from my kids lives. A great nanny cannot replace a great mom or great dad. A great nanny is a wonderful replacement for a disengaged parent.
In all of the options, I am assuming that - you have a great marriage, and your DH is a wonderful husband and father, You will never divorce or be left in financial crisis - you have children without any big issues and you like spending time with your children - you have the money to take care of your needs like college, retirement, outsourcing chores etc. |
Anonymous
| Definitely A. |
Anonymous
Op - remember I said the dad in option a stays home (so no nanny unless needed). But to your q - assume based on $500k. Yes you can save but it’s half of $1m so you save less or save twice as slowly so that person needs to work for more years |
Anonymous
BTW - I am not throwing any shade on having a nanny. Any and all support to raise a kid or run a household or take care of elderly relatives is a boon. A great nanny can help to make things easier - even for a SAHM. Being at home with money and help allowed me to do my SAHM role with ease. I am not the super high energy, super frantic, super efficient person IRL, who can do it all. I like to do things with support around me. And I like to do the things that I like to do. For me it was guiding and being with my kids. I am not a person who cares too much about expensive things, so having a million dollar HHI is not something that I value over time. As long as I can pay for services, I am happy with my life. I was able to SAHM with a decent HHI. It has never reached $500K. We have always felt very wealthy with just $120K - $400K over the years. |
Anonymous
| Neither - the long-term SAHPs I know are not the sharpest tools in the drawer, and I’d be worried about mental degradation. |